Starring: Mila Kunis, Kristen Bell, Kathryn Hahn, Jada Pinkett Smith, Christina Applegate, Lilly Singh, Annie Mumolo
OUR RATING: ★★★☆☆
Story:
Comedy written and directed by Jon Lucas and Scott Moore. Bad Moms (2016) centers on Amy Mitchell (Mila Kunis), who has a seemingly perfect life, over-achieving kids, beautiful home and a career. However she’s over-worked, over-committed and exhausted to the point that she’s about to snap. When the PTA alpha moms (Christina Applegate and Jada Pinkett Smith) at her kids’ school push her too far, Amy finally snaps. Fed up, she joins forces with two other over-stressed moms (Kathryn Hahn and Kristen Bell), on a quest to liberate themselves from conventional responsibilities, going on a wild, un-mom-like binge of long overdue freedom, fun and self-indulgence putting them on a collision course with the PTA perfect moms.
Where to Watch:
Best Quotes
Amy: I’m Amy Mitchell, and I’m a mom. I had my first kid when I was twenty years-old, and I’ve been running late ever since. My days are filled with dropping the kids at school, then racing to work where I have meeting, after meeting, after meeting. I usually end up eating a s**tty lunch at my desk, and I try to work out once a week. Why do I suck at Zumba? Most days, I race back to school for the kids plays, and poetry readings and class projects, which I’m always late for. And then there’s PTA meetings, and volunteering and parent-teacher conferences. Jesus, Miss Wiggins f***ing hates me. At least once a day, I feel like the worst mom in the world, and I cry in my car. Then I shuttle the kids to piano lessons and soccer games and dance classes and doctors’ appointments, before my daily trip to the grocery store. This chick seems like she’s got it all figured out. But I feel like I’m screwing up all the time. Still, I love being a mom.
Amy: Okay, so your dad had to go out of town on a business trip, so I’m going to try to do everything myself today, which should be fine, as long as everybody does what they are supposed to do. Right?
Amy: [the family dog limps into the kitchen] Oh, no.
Gwendolyn: [referring to Kiki] Oh, my God. She just got all her sadness all over me.
Stacy: You know what? I saw him install a car seat yesterday in two seconds. I’m telling you, it was like, boom, boom, click. It was so hot.
Vicky: Oh, gosh.
Stacy: You know what? I think I’d let him put it in my butt. I mean, in theory, I’m not really into the butt thing, but I would let him go to town back there.
Vicky: I’m with you.
Amy: [pulling up in front of her kids school] Okay, I got four minutes to get Roscoe to the vet, so I love you kids, get out, get out, get out, get out. I love you so much. I’m so sorry.
Dylan: Bye, Mom.
Amy: [Gwendolyn knocks on her car window, taking her by surprise and she sprays herself with her hot coffee] Oh, my God! F***, it’s so hot!
Gwendolyn: Can you roll down? Can you roll down the window?
Amy: Okay. Okay, okay. Hey.
Gwendolyn: Hey, babe. Listen. Hi. There is a emergency PTA meeting today at five o’clock. It should be about two to three hours.
Amy: Awesome. Awesome.
Jane Mitchell: I can’t believe I’m going to be late to my first soccer practice.
Amy: Baby, I’m doing the best that I can.
Jane Mitchell: Yeah, that’s what makes it even sadder.
Amy: Excuse me, Coach? I’m so sorry that Jane is late. It is all my fault.
Soccer Coach: You look wrecked. You having a bad day?
Amy: Oh, God, it literally could not get any…
Soccer Coach: [as Amy suddenly gets hit by a soccer ball] S**t.
[Amy starts screaming in frustration]
Gwendolyn: Now, I called this emergency PTA meeting to address an issue that radically affects the safety of our children. The bake sale.
Amy: Is this a joke?
Gwendolyn: Now, this is a list of the toxic ingredients that are absolutely banned from the bake sale. No BPA, no MSG, no BHA, no BHT. Plus no soy, no sesame, and, of course, no nuts or eggs or milk or butter or salt or sugar or wheat. Okay?
Amy: Sorry, what ingredients can we use?
Gwendolyn: Anyway, I will be putting together a special bake sale police force that will monitor the food. That will destroy any offensive treats and prosecute the wrongdoers. Yes. So who will be my first volunteer for the bake sale police force? I think we’re going to have Amy Mitchell!
Amy: What?
Gwendolyn: That’s what you get for being late, sweetie.
Amy: No.
Amy: I’ve had a really long day. I have been bruised and burned, knocked unconscious. I screwed up my daughter’s first day at soccer, and I hand-searched my son’s poo for a pen cap, and my poor dog has vertigo. I mean, who knew that that was even a real thing, you guys? God, I’m drowning at work and my boss is a f***ing moron. And three hours ago I may or may not have committed a felony hit-and-run. I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry. I’m done. I quit.
Carla: [to Kiki] You’re bat-s**t crazy, yeah. And I’m never getting in a car with you.
Carla: [getting drunk at a bar] Do you know what I hate? There are so many f***ing rules now.
Amy: Yes, God. “Don’t punish your kids.”
Kiki: “Don’t say no to your kids.”
Carla: Yeah. “Go to your kid’s baseball games. Tell your kids you love them. Don’t f*** the janitor at your kid’s school.” I mean, what the f*** is this? Russia?
Amy: We’re killing ourselves, trying to be perfect, and it’s making us insane.
Kiki: In this day and age, it’s impossible to be a good mom.
Amy: Screw it.
Kiki: Yeah.
Amy: Let’s be bad moms.
Carla: Oh, I’m in.
Amy: Right?
Kiki: Oh, my gosh. Okay. This is exciting. I’m in!
Amy: Yes! To bad moms
Kiki: To bad moms!
Carla: To bad moms!
Kiki: [after making a toast to being bad moms] I love you guys.
Carla: [Kiki puts her arms around Amy and Carla] Oh, dude.
Amy: We love you, Kiki.
Carla: We just met, Kiki.
Kiki: Forever. I love you forever.
Carla: I’m not into this kind of…
Amy: Oh, gosh. Honey, we got to go get you home. We got to go.
Carla: Yeah, let’s go.
Amy: We got to go.
Kiki: No, I can’t. I have to go to the supermarket.
Amy: Let’s go to the supermarket!
Amy: [calls Kiki] Hello?
Kiki: Hey, Kiki. It’s Amy.
Amy: Hi! I was actually calling to see, if you’d like to join me at the movies today.
Kiki: Are we allowed to do that?
Amy: Well, I don’t see why not.
Kiki: I can’t. I mean, I have to iron Kent’s underwear.
Amy: What? Why?
Kiki: I don’t know. He likes really stiff underwear.
Amy: Come on, Kiki, live a little.
Kiki: Okay. Okay, okay. I’ll do it.
Amy: Awesome. Okay, I’ll call Carla.
Kiki: Oh, fun! I like her. I’m also very scared of her.
Amy: This has been so much fun. Thank you, girls, for coming out with me.
Kiki: Are you kidding me? This has literally been the best day of my entire life.
Gwendolyn: Well, you see, I care, sweetie. I don’t, I don’t know what’s been going on with you, I mean, with your weird outbursts and your terrible style, but it ends now. Okay? I run this school, and no one takes a class or kicks a ball or plays a f***ing clarinet without my say-so. And I can make life a living hell for you and your dirty little children. Do you understand me?
Amy: Woh, Gwendolyn. I genuinely think you should just relax a little bit. I mean, have a donut hole. They’re delicious. They’re from a gas station. They’re…
Gwendolyn: You have crossed the line, little girl. And I am going to destroy you. Winter is coming.
Carla: [referring to Amy’s bra] Holy f***! Look at your mom bra! There’s so much surface area. You can make three regular bras out of this one mom bra.
Amy: This isn’t my mom bra. This is my sexy bra.
Carla: Shut up!
Amy: Don’t laugh.
Carla: Wait, are you serious?
Amy: Yes!
Carla: Oh, honey.
Carla: [referring to Amy’s bra] Oh! That looks like you just got out of surgery.
Amy: Is it that bad?
Carla: Yeah, there’s just one boob-log.
Kiki: Yeah.
Carla: You don’t even have two tits.
Amy: I have this in black. Do you guys want to see it in black?
Carla, Kiki: No!
Amy: Oh, wow.
Kiki: This bra will be the death of your v***na.
Amy: You guys, I’ve only handled one p**is my entire life.
Kiki: Oh, honey!
Amy: What do I do if I get a guy with a weird d**k?
Kiki: Kent is a never-hard.
Amy: Ooh, what’s a never-hard?
Kiki: Oh, he never gets fully hard. So I just have to kind of fold his p**is up like a balloon animal and shove it up in my v***na.
Carla: That sounds horrible!
Amy: Yeah.
Kiki: Sometimes I take the balls and shove them up there too, because at least, you know, they’re firm.
Carla: Honey, that is a lot of s**t to shove up your cooter.
Kiki: I mean, I’m just happy he’s circumcised.
Amy: What if I get somebody who’s not circumcised?
Carla: Run out of the room screaming. It’s like finding a gun in the street. Just scream and get out of there!