By Cody (Phoenix, Arizona)
batman-robin

 

Batman & Robin. That’s all anyone has to say before the painful memories begin to resurface. June 20th 1997 was one of the darkest days in film history, and by dark I don’t mean how Batman Begins was dark. No, the dark I’m talking about is what’s brought on by depression, disappointment, and dismay. There are so many problems with Batman & Robin that it can be hard to touch all aspects. Trust me I could write pages about every feature that makes this movie horrendous but I’m just going to touch upon the major issues.

To start, we have the acting. The acting is terrible, but I can’t put entire blame on the actors because the script is like something out of a children’s book. For example Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character of Mr. Freeze, mostly says cheesy one-liners and everything he says is only in short sentences. Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy makes me roll my eyes whenever she’s on screen because she acts (like everyone in this movie) like a cartoon with no qualities that relate to good or even mediocre villains for that matter. I’m not even going to talk about Bane because it’s too painful. If I want a good Bane I’ll watch The Dark Knight Rises.

Not only are the villains weak, but the heroes are as well. George Clooney as Batman made no sense at all. In every adaptation of Batman, Bruce Wayne treats his hero persona as a different person altogether, but here George Clooney shows no distinction or even a flicker of the character that is the dark knight.

Robin and Batgirl are in the movie simply to be Batman’s “help” but they don’t bring anything to the movie than two additional characters to deliver sleep inducing dialogue. The plot is also incomprehensible. I am strongly against spoilers so I’m not going to go into it.

The action in the movie more closely resembles the 1960’s Adam West TV show than an action movie made in the late 1990’s. All the characters flip through the air noticeably on wires.

What I truly believe is the worst aspect of the movie is the director Joel Schumacher. What just hurts me most is that Schumacher can be a very good director but in the case of Batman & Robin it looks like his talent took a vacation.

Overall this movie is more closely related to the comedy spoof genre than action/superhero rivaling such classic movies as Meet the Spartans & Vampires Suck.

Batman & Robin is an atrocity. Do not watch it, do not rent it, don’t even watch it for free unless you want to live with the aftertaste of bad filmmaking. All I can say is thank goodness for Christopher Nolan for resurrecting Batman in the form of his Dark Knight Trilogy or else this would have been what Batman would’ve been remembered as.

Rating: 0.3/5

 

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