Due
Date
Quotes (Page 3)
Due
Date
Quotes
Part 1
| 2 | 3
Border
Security Guard:
What's wrong with your friend?[a stoned Peter is playing with the passenger car window]
Ethan Tremblay: I...Peter, don't do that.
Border Security Guard: Why are your eyes so glassy? You been partying?
Ethan Tremblay: No, I have glycoma.
Border Security Guard: What about your friend? Does he have glycoma too?
[Ethan turns to Peter]
Ethan Tremblay: Answer the man. Do you have glycoma too?
[Peter shakes his head]
Ethan Tremblay: No, he doesn't have glycoma.
Border Security Guard: What about the dog? Does he have glycoma? Cause his eyes are glassy as fuck.
[Peter laughs]
Border Security Guard: Stop the car, give me the keys please.
[after Ethan has abandoned Peter at the Mexican border]
Border Security Guard: I told you, I took the wrong exit and wound up here by mistake. No matter how many times you ask me that's going to be my answer.
Peter Highman: You sound like Jason Bourne, man. You don't know where you're going, no ID.
Federali Agent: You Americano's sneak into our country, bring drugs, party. You sleep with our women.
Peter Highman: I've never heard of an American sneaking into Mexico. This would be an isolated incident. Actually it's usually the reverse.
[after Ethan has broken Peter out of the Mexican border]
Peter Highman: How many laws did we just break?
Ethan Tremblay: I don't know, sixty?
Peter Highman: I had no idea where I was going. Then I see you, remember when we jackknifed together? But you didn't look like you.
Ethan Tremblay: We locked eyes, I know that.
Peter Highman: God, you looked crazy!
Ethan Tremblay: Yeah. Well, I was in stealth mode. Still got the scarf on my head and everything.
Peter Highman: You were like a fucking commando! You were a comanche warrior.
Ethan Tremblay: Thanks.
Peter Highman: It was the greatest ever.
Ethan Tremblay: Thank you.
Peter Highman: Rescue. A daring rescue. You came back for me.
Ethan Tremblay: Of course I did.
Peter Highman: That's so great.
Ethan Tremblay: Yeah, I made you a promise. I told you I was going to get you home safe. I'm getting you home safe, okay.
Peter Highman: I'm gonna kiss you.
Ethan Tremblay: What?
Peter Highman: I'm going to give you a smooch.
Ethan Tremblay: No.
Peter Highman: Dude, come on?
Ethan Tremblay: No way!
Peter Highman: I'm going to give you a little smooch.
Ethan Tremblay: Stop, Peter! I'm driving!
Peter Highman: Come on.
[Peter kisses Ethan on his arm]
Ethan Tremblay: Sick!
Peter Highman: You go it.
Ethan Tremblay: My gosh! Everything's up and down with you, roller coast.
Peter Highman: I owe you big time. There's no fucking way I'd seen my kid if you hadn't done that. There's no way. I love you, dude.
Ethan Tremblay: I love you too, Peter.
[looking over at the Grand Canyon]
Peter Highman: I'm tellin' ya, I wouldn't make it up.
Ethan Tremblay: I could have sworn I read it was man made.
Peter Highman: Nope, nope. Not correct. Very old. Formed over time. Grand Canyon. Known fact.
Ethan Tremblay: Peter, I have a photogenic memory...
Peter Highman: Ethan...
Ethan Tremblay: I can recall...
Peter Highman: Ethan, I promise you. It's...It's old, it's the Grand Canyon. It's not the Hoover Dam.
Ethan Tremblay: Well, I know it's not the Hoover Dam. It was build by the pilgrims.
Peter Highman: Also incorrect.
Ethan Tremblay: Let's stick with the plan, you know.
Peter Highman: But I thought this was part of the plan. What am I missin'? Ethan? What's really goin' on? Because when I said the Grand Canyon wasn't on the way, you said 'Too bad, it would have been perfect.' And when I said we already passed the Mississippi River, you said 'Too bad, dad loved titties and jazz.'
Ethan Tremblay: It's just...just, you know, we got stuff to do and I don't want to step on it.
Peter Highman: I know it's hard to say goodbye. And I didn't know your dad, but from what you've told me he was a great father. He was a cool guy. I'm just saying, this gesture, if you got it in you. He deserves a grand gesture.
[to his father's ashes]
Ethan Tremblay: Dad, you were like a father to me. And uh...I don't know how I'm gonna make it without you. But I know that you'll look after me from up there. I have to make you proud dad, okay. I promise. I love you, say hi to mum.
[to Peter after he's thrown his dad's ashes over the Grand Canyon]
Ethan Tremblay: He was a great guy. You would have loved him, he was just like me.
Ethan Tremblay: What?
Peter Highman: I had no intention of comin' back. So wrong.
Ethan Tremblay: Why would you do that?
Peter Highman: Because I'm a pig, I'm an asshole. I don't know, I'm working on it.
Ethan Tremblay: Well, you know what? You came back with donuts, and I think that says more about you than leaving does.
Ethan Tremblay: Well, there's something I've been wanting to get off my chest too.
Peter Highman: Shoot.
Ethan Tremblay: I'm not really twenty three years old.
Peter Highman: I know. It's okay.
Ethan Tremblay: The other thing is, Peter, I have your wallet and I've had it this whole time.
Peter Highman: What? What are you talkin' about?
Ethan Tremblay: Peter. Okay, listen...
Peter Highman: Why would you do that?
Ethan Tremblay: I saw it on the plane and I didn't wanna be alone, I was really vulnerable because of my father's death. I had just...I didn't wanna go across country by myself, you know?
[Peter grabs his wallet from Ethan and looks through it]
Peter Highman: It's all here.
Ethan Tremblay: Yeah.
Peter Highman: All my money, all my credit cards. Everything...everything I needed. This whole time.
Ethan Tremblay: You okay with it?
Peter Highman: It's in the past. What are you gonna do?
Ethan Tremblay: Okay.
Peter Highman: Okay.
Ethan Tremblay: Thanks, Peter.
[Peter shrugs]
Ethan Tremblay: Okay.
Peter Highman: Okay.
Ethan Tremblay: Let's hit the road then, right?
Peter Highman: Yeah, sure.
Ethan Tremblay: You get Sonny and I'll uh...I'll drive I guess.
Peter Highman: Okay. I'll grab him.
[Peter suddenly grabs Ethan and bangs his head hard against the car]
Peter Highman: I'll fucking kill you!
[after finding out his wife has gone into labor]
Peter Highman: Not gonna make it. That's great, I'm gonna miss the birth of my child.
Ethan Tremblay: We are gonna make it.
Peter Highman: There's no 'we'. Don't say 'we'. Okay, now...
Ethan Tremblay: First of all in the future...
Peter Highman: No, me first.
Ethan Tremblay: Please?
Peter Highman: No, you can't. I told you I saw red. I told you I was put my hands on you. I have a problem and I am sorry you were the recepient of it, but I warned you. I'm sorry.
Ethan Tremblay: Fine. But in the future when we're hanging out as buddies, if we get into a fight, don't got for my face! You know that's how I make a living, okay?
Peter Highman: Okay.
[Ethan opens the glove compratment and finds a gun in there, he takes it out]
Ethan Tremblay: Why do you have this thing on?
[he fires the gun, shooting at Peter]
Ethan Tremblay: [in shock] Shoot!
[Peter screams]
Ethan Tremblay: I can't believe I did that! Sorry, Peter. I'm so sorry. I didn't think it was loaded. I'm so embaressed. Pull over.
Peter Highman: No, I wanna keep going.
Ethan Tremblay: No, no, no! Pull over.
Peter Highman: I wanna keep going. I don't wanna stop.
Ethan Tremblay: Peter, pull over?
Peter Highman: No, it didn't happen!
Ethan Tremblay: Pull over, pull over, pull over!
Peter Highman: [shouts] It didn't happen! Why? I'm in shock!
Ethan Tremblay: We gotta get you to a hospital.
Ethan Tremblay: Oh, God!
Peter Highman: Stop! Stop.
Ethan Tremblay: What did I do? What did I do? What did I do?
Peter Highman: I'm with you now, it's okay. Tell you what? Let's do a little acting exercise like we did at the restuarent bathroom, okay? You're a sergeant, I'm just another grunt in your platoon but you promised me that you'd get me home to my high school sweetheart. Action.
[Ethan throws up all over Peter]
Ethan Tremblay: I puked into the wound!
Peter Highman: I know. It's okay, buddy.
[Ethan starts to act out the scene Peter had told him to do before Ethan puked]
Ethan Tremblay: Get into the back steet, private. What are you, a girl or somethin'?
Peter Highman: Excellent.
Ethan Tremblay: You're son's about to be born, what are you gonna name him?
Peter Highman: I'll know it when I see him.
Ethan Tremblay: What about Sonny?
Peter Highman: No. I'm not naming my son after a masturbating dog.
Ethan Tremblay: Don't listen to him, Sonny. He loves you.
[walking down the hospital corridor]
Ethan Tremblay: Shoot!
Peter Highman: What?
Ethan Tremblay: I forgot to crack the window for Sonny.
Peter Highman: The door's off the car, Ethan!
Ethan Tremblay: What? Okay, good. See, together we think of everything.
Peter Highman: Have I told you, that I love your perm?
Ethan Tremblay: Thank you, Peter.
[walking down to hospital corrider trying to find Sarah]
Ethan Tremblay: Put your handcuffs in your pocket, hide your hancuffs. Here's your rally monkey.
Peter Highman: Boom!
[Peter finally finds Sarah's room in the hospital, she's in labor]
Sarah Highman: Baby, you finally made it!
Dr. Greene: Jesus, Peter! Are you okay?
Sarah Highman: Baby?
Peter Highman:Yeah, I just lost a little blood.
[Peter faints]
Ethan Tremblay: Everybody relax. Just relax. We need to find a hospital, okay?
Sarah Highman: Who are you?
Ethan Tremblay: My name is Ethan Tremblay. I'm your husbands best friend.
Sarah Highman: It's nice to meet you.
Ethan Tremblay: Nice to meet you too. Now, let's get that baby out of your vagina.
Sarah Highman: Okay.
[looking at his baby]
Peter Highman: That's a handsome boy.
Ethan Tremblay: It's a girl, actually.
[Peter shakes his in disagreement]
Ethan Tremblay: Yep.
Peter Highman: No.
Ethan Tremblay: Doctor Greene says it happens all the time, you know. Ultrasounds aren't always reliable.
Peter Highman: Right.
Ethan Tremblay: Little Rosie.
Peter Highman: Rosie. Little Rosie Highman. Does that sound strange to you?
Ethan Tremblay: No, it's such a pretty name. Sarah thought you'd be okay with it.
Peter Highman: When d'you talk to Sarah?
Ethan Tremblay: Right after I cut the umbilical cord.
Peter Highman: You cut it?
Ethan Tremblay: The tether of life, from mother to child. I got to cut that.
Peter Highman: No!
Ethan Tremblay: Yes.
Peter Highman: You?
Ethan Tremblay: I kept some. I kept a little bit of it and put it in my wallet. It's good for sore ankles and stuff.
Peter Highman: Oh my God! Ethan, I dreamt this. This is crazy. I had this strange dream that it was today, and...and...it was a...a bear.
Ethan Tremblay: A what?
Peter Highman: And the bear chewed the cord.
Ethan Tremblay: Mmhmm.
Peter Highman: I mean that's kinds spot on if you think about it. That's like a one in a...you know what I mean?
Ethan Tremblay: I don't get it. What...
Peter Highman: Forget it. It's, it's...it's uh...it's gotta be a good sign.
Ethan Tremblay: God, a crazy few days!
Peter Highman: That was nuts.
Ethan Tremblay: We should do it again sometime, go across country again.
Peter Highman: Okay. Sure.
Ethan Tremblay: Call me tomorrow about it.
Peter Highman: If I don't...
Ethan Tremblay: Call me tomorrow about it.
Peter Highman: I might email you. Please don't take it personally.
Ethan Tremblay: No, no. An...an email's fine.
[just before Ethan's about to leave]
Ethan Tremblay: It's been a real pleasure, Peter.
Peter Highman: Been a lot of things.
[as Ethan is walking away]
Peter Highman: Hey, Ethan. Welcome to Hollywood!
Ethan Tremblay: What's that? You want me to come back and talk to you
Peter Highman: No. No. I'm just saying in the most general sense, the city welcomes you.
Ethan Tremblay: Just make sure you call me tomorrow.
Peter Highman: I'll call you.
[watching Ethan on an episode of Two and a Half Men]
Sarah Highman: [laughing] You what...he's...he's really funny!
Peter Highman: Don't get crazy. I'll tell you the show's funny.
Sarah Highman: Come on. You love him, you know you love him.
Peter Highman: I survived him, there's a difference.
[there's an incoming call from Ethan on Peter's cell phone]
Peter Highman: Like clockwork. I told him to call me after we watched it.
Sarah Highman: He's excited.
[referring to Rosie, Peter's holding her on his lap]
Peter Highman: If she says his name I'll freak out.
[last lines; Ethan acting on an episode of Two and a Half Men]
Ethan Tremblay: Pita bread? Hummus?
Alan Harper: Um..again, no thank you.
Charlie Harper: You got anymore pot?
Ethan Tremblay: Not for nine dollars an hour I don't. I mean, I don't know what you're talking about.
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Total
Quotes: 90
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