Funny Movie Quotes and Lines -
Don't
take the jokes too
seriously!
We all know that there a lot of funny movie quotes out there but with
so many things going on in our lives nowadays it's hard to remember
them and we forget what's funny let alone the quotes from the movie.
To help you along on this little expedition of merriment and amusement
I have put together for you a random collection of the the funniest
movie quotes I could find and if you don't have the time to watch the
entire film, well, these quotes are the next best thing. If nothing
else, they are a little taster of what kind of comedy you'll find
within that movie.
Hopefully somewhere in these quotes will be something to
put a smile on your face, but remember don't take these jokes too
seriously!
If you want to send your favorite funny movie lines, please do not
hesitate to send it by
clicking
here.
Let us not waste any more time and begin the glee here...
Total
Funny Movie Quotes: 64
Funny Movie Quotes Part 1 | 2 | 3
10
Things I Hate About You (1999)
Ms. Perky: People
perceive you as
somewhat...
Kat Stratford:
Tempestuous?
Ms. Perky:
'Heinous bitch' is
the term used most often.
See
more 10
Things I Hate About You Quotes
Walter Stratford: Hello,
Katarina.
Make anyone cry today?
Kat Stratford:
Sadly, no. But
it's only 4:30.
Chastity: I
know
you can be
overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be
whelmed?
Bianca: I
think you can in
Europe.
[discovering Joey Donner
has drawn on
his face]
Michael: I
have a dick on my face, don't I?
[after discovering Kat
has crashed
her car on purpose]
Walter Stratford: My
insurance does not cover PMS!
Kat Stratford: Well
then, tell
them I had a seizure.
Walter Stratford: You're
18, you
don't know what you want. And you won't know what you want 'til you're
45, and even if you get it, you'll be too old to use it.
Kat Stratford:
I
guess in this
society, being male and an asshole makes you worthy of our time.
Kat Stratford:
We're
going now.
Walter Stratford:
Alright, wait
a minute. No drinking, no drugs, no kissing, no tattoos, no
piercings, no ritual animal slaughters of any kind. Oh, God,
I'm
giving them ideas.
30
Minutes
or Less (2011)
[at the check out
counter a register woman swipes their items]
Register Woman:
Guns. Mask. You sure you all don't wanna grab some condoms?
Nick: No.
Why?
Register Woman:
Because this is usually what men buy before they rape someone.
Chet: Oh,
we're not rapists! Us two, small fries? No way.
[she gives them a cold
unbelieving look]
Register Woman:
Is it gonna be cash or credit for your rape kit?
[Chet put a box of
hamburger slider kit on the counter]
Chet: Hey,
is a slider station in a rape kit? Cause we're gettin' one of
those too.
Nick: We'll
pay cash.
Chet: Not
into rape, just into sliders.
See more 30
Minutes or Less Quotes
The 40 Year Old
Virgin (2005)
Mooj: Hey
Andy,
don't let him
bother you. It's okay not to have sex. Not everybody's a pussy magnet.
You, uh, what are you, 25?
Andy Stitzer:
I'm 40.
Mooj: Holy
shit, man, you got
to get on that!
See
more The 40
Year Old Virgin Quotes
Andy
Stitzer: You know what? I respect women! I love women! I
respect them so much that I completely stay away from them!
[after getting his chest
partially
waxed]
Andy Stitzer:
This is not a
good look for me!
Boy at Health Clinic:
Hey, do you
have any extra large condoms?
Dad at Health Clinic: Oh,
Seth, please! You have a tiny penis.
Andy
Stitzer: I need some poon! I need genital to genital
connections!
[to a shirtless Andy,
who has an
incredibly hairy chest]
David: I
love your sweater.
Does that come in a V-neck?
[describing the
prostitute who
was really
a transvestite]
Andy Stitzer: She
had hands as
big as Andre the Giant's, and she had an Adam's apple as big as her
balls.
[Trish and Andy are on
the bed,
kissing]
Trish: Do
you have
protection?
Andy Stitzer:
I don't like
guns.
Andy Stitzer:
I'm
gonna tell her.
Cal: You
should totally tell
her.
Andy Stitzer:
I'm going to.
Cal: 'Cause
I watched this
movie called "Liar Liar" and the message was, "Don't lie." And that was
a smart movie.
50/50
(2011)
Kyle: You're
gonna be fine.
Adam: Yeah.
Kyle: You're
gonna be fine. Fifty fifty! If you were a casino game, you'd have the
best odds.
Adam: Yeah.
Thanks.
See more 50/50 Quotes
(500) Days of Summer
(2009)
[Tom's boss reads the
message on a
valentine's card that Tom has written after he's been dumped by Summer]
Vance: Roses
are red, violets
are blue...Fuck you, whore!
Annie
Hall (1977)
Alvy Singer:
It's mental masturbation!
Annie Hall:
And you would know all about that, wouldn't you?
Alvy Singer:
Hey, don't knock masturbation! It's sex with someone I love.
See
more Annie Hall Quotes
As Good as It Gets (1997)
[enters his
psychiatrist's
office]
Melvin Udall:
Hi.
[shuts the
door] HELP!
Dr. Green:
If you want to see
me, you will not do this. You will make an appointment.
Melvin Udall:
Dr. Green, how
can you diagnose someone as an obsessive compulsive disorder, and then
act like I have some choice about barging in here?
See
more As Good
As it Get Quotes
Melvin Udall:
People who talk
in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch.
Carol Connelly:
OK, we all have
these terrible stories to get over, and you...
Melvin Udall:
It's not true.
Some have great stories, pretty stories that take place at lakes with
boats and friends and noodle salad. Just no one in this car. But, a lot
of people, that's their story. Good times, noodle salad. What makes it
so hard is not that you had it bad, but that you're that pissed that so
many others had it good.
[introducing Carol to
Simon]
Melvin Udall: Carol
the
waitress, Simon the fag.
Carol Connelly:
When you first
entered the restaurant, I thought you were handsome...and then, of
course, you spoke.
Melvin Udall:
Never, never,
interrupt me, okay? Not if there's a fire, not even if you hear the
sound of a thud from my home and one week later there's a smell coming
from there that can only be a decaying human body and you have to hold
a hanky to your face because the stench is so thick that you think
you're going to faint. Even then, don't come knocking. Or, if it's
election night, and you're excited and you wanna celebrate because some
fudgepacker that you date has been elected the first queer president of
the United States and he's going to have you down to Camp David, and
you want someone to share the moment with. Even then, don't knock. Not
on this door. Not for ANY reason. Do you get me, sweetheart?
Simon Bishop:
Uhm, yes. It's
not a...subtle point that you're making.
Melvin Udall:
Okay then.
[shuts door in Simon's
face]
[sitting in the bar
after he's
insulted Carol and she's storms out]
Melvin Udall:
Well, it's not
right to go into details, I got nervous. I screwed up, I said the wrong
thing. Where if I hadn't, I could be in bed right now with a woman who,
if you make her laugh, you got a life. Instead I'm here with you...
[gestures to bartender]
Melvin Udall:
...No offense,
but a moron pushing the last legal drug.
Receptionist:
How do you write women so well?
Melvin Udall: I
think of a
man, and I take away reason and accountability.
Simon Bishop: The
best thing
you have going for you is your willingness to humiliate yourself.
[after Carol arrives at
Melvin's
apartment in the middle of the night]
Carol Connelly:
I'm not going
to sleep with you! I will never sleep with you, never, ever! Not ever!
Melvin Udall:
Well, I'm sorry,
but...we don't open for the "no sex oaths" until 9am.
[to Simon after he's
been released
from hospital for being beaten up and robbed]
Melvin Udall: You're
a
disgrace to depression.
Bad Teacher (2011)
Elizabeth Halsey: You
know
Lynn, when I first started teaching I thought that I was doing it for
all the right reasons. Shorter hours. Summers off. No accountability.
Lynn Davies: Oh,
I love my summers. Fresh corn...mmm.
Elizabeth Halsey: From
now on, my full time job is finding a guy who's gonna take care of me.
Lynn Davies: God,
I pray for that.
See more Bad
Teacher Quotes
The Big Year (2011)
Stu: Am I
nuts, Edith?
Edith: Are
you asking me as a therapist or as a wife?
Stu: Which
one is cheaper?
See
more The Big Year Quotes
Brad Harris:
There's going to be major fallout in a few hours!
Bill Clemens: Nuclear
fallout?
Brad Harris: Bird
fallout!
Barbara: Do
you ever wonder what killed your marriage to Steph in o-three?
Kenny Bostick:
First of all, I was married to Bridget in o-three.
[to Stu]
Brad Harris: I
just wanna do something big, you know?
Kenny Bostick: We
need a little adventure.
Brad Harris: We're
doing a big year.
Kenny Bostick: A
year to do all the things we never could.
[to Brad]
Stu: Most
people wake up one day and realize they didn't do everything they
wanted to.
Blazing
Saddles (1974)
Bart:
I'm rapidly
becoming a big underground success in this town.
Jim: See?
In another
twenty-five years, you'll be able to shake their hands in broad
daylight.
See
more Blazing
Saddles Quotes
[Jim downs a bottle of
whiskey in one
long guzzle]
Bart: A man
drink like that and
he don't eat, he is going to DIE.
Jim: [eagerly] When?
[consoling Bart]
Jim: What
did you expect?
"Welcome, sonny", "Make yourself at home", "Marry my daughter". You've
got to remember that these are just simple farmers. These are people of
the land. The common clay of the new West. You know...morons.
[explaining why he
became a drunk]
Jim: Well,
it got so that every piss-ant prairie punk who
thought he could shoot a gun would ride into town to try out the Waco
Kid. I must have killed more men than Cecil B. DeMille. It got pretty
gritty. I started to hear the word "draw" in my sleep. Then one day, I
was just walking down the street when I heard a voice behind me say,
"Reach for it, mister!" I spun around...and there I was, face-to-face
with a six-year old kid. Well, I just threw my guns down and walked
away. Little bastard shot me in the ass. So I limped to the nearest
saloon, crawled inside a whiskey bottle, and I've been there ever since.
Hedley Lamarr:
Unfortunately
there is one thing standing between me and that property...the rightful
owners.
Hedley Lamarr:
Qualifications?
Applicant:
Rape, murder, arson,
and rape.
Hedley Lamarr:
You said rape
twice.
Applicant: I
like rape.
Taggart:
What do you want me to
do, sir?
Hedley Lamarr:
I want you to
round up every vicious criminal and gunslinger in the west. Take this
down.
[Taggart looks for a pen
and paper
while Hedley talks]
Hedley Lamarr: I
want
rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperadoes, mugs,
pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men,
Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers,
hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers,
ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists!
[Taggart finally finds a
pen and
paper]
Taggart:
Could you
repeat that, sir?
[Taggart finds everyone
at the camp
farting whilst eating beans]
Lyle: How
'bout some more
beans, Mr. Taggart?
[Taggart fans his hat in
the air to
remove the stench]
Taggart: I'd
say you've
had enough!
Bart: Hey,
Charlie. What is it
that's not exactly water and it ain't exactly earth?
Bart, Charlie:
QUICKSAND!
Bridesmaids
(2011)
Annie's Mom:
I signed up to speak at AA tonight and I...I...I...I just have to.
Annie: Mom?!
Annie's Mom: No!
I...I forgot. I'm sorry! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!
Annie: Mom,
I keep telling you, you're not supposed to go to those things. You
know, you're not an alcoholic.
Annie's Mom: Well,
only because I've never had a drink.
Annie: What?
Annie's Mom: I
mean, they are inspiring.
See more Bridesmaids
Quotes
Cars 2 (2011)
Finn McMissile:
Finn McMissile, British intelligence.
Mater: Tow
Mater, average intelligence.
The Change-Up (2011)
Dave: You're
living the dream,
Mitch. Having children, it's...it's like, it's living with little
mini-heroin addicts. You know, they're laughing one minute and then
they’re crying the next. And then they trying to kill themselves in the
bathroom for no good reason. They're very mean and selfish and burn
through your money. And they break shit...
Mitch: Got
it! Got it! Got it! Come on!
See
more
The Change-Up Quotes
Dave: Tell
me about your women. Please!
Mitch: I
have been keeping company with a number of nice ladies.
[going through photos of
the women he's seeing]
Mitch: This,
right here is Brenda. She wants it in missionary, wheel barrow, Arabian
goggles, the pastrami sandwich. Let me tell you, no man is that hungry.
Dave: I
don't even know what these are!
Mitch:
You're married.
Dave: Good
point.
[referring to the woman
in the photo]
Dave: What
is her name?
Mitch: That
is Tatiana.
Dave: Wow!
And what's her last name?
Mitch: Tatiana,
calls me at three in the morning and wants to fuck steam. Who gives a
shit!
Dave: Right.
Got it!
[whilst pissing
into a fountain]
Dave: You
know I was just saying that I envy you life, Mitch.
Mitch: And
I envy yours.
Mitch and Dave: I
wish I had your life!
[after they’re
switched bodies; Dave is now in Mitch's body and Mitch is in Dave's]
Dave: I'm a
douchebag!
Mitch: I'm
a fucking tool!
Mitch: For
the first time in your life, you're good looking, you're single. What's
goin' on between us, it's crazy! But what's even more crazy, is not to
use it!
Dave: I
adjusted the W.A.P.C to reflect the new monthly projection. I'll have
my briefs on your desk by lunch.
Mitch: That
puts my balls on your chin by dinner.
Dave: That
is schedule for sexual harassment!
Mitch: Or,
you two guys should go out. Cause you're still single, Mitch.
[turns and winks at Dave]
Dave: Wait!
What?
Dave: Question.
How long have you been shaved down there?
Mitch: I
get an extra inch. And only married dudes rock the dick froze anymore!
Clueless
(1995)
Heather: It's
just like Hamlet
said, "To thine own self be true."
Cher: Hamlet
didn't say that.
Heather: I
think I remember
Hamlet accurately.
Cher: Well,
I remember Mel
Gibson accurately, and he didn't say that. That Polonius guy did.
See
more Clueless
Quotes
Josh: You
look like Pippi
Longstocking.
Cher: Well
you look like
Forrest Gump. Who's Pippi Longstocking?
Josh:
Someone Mel Gibson never
played.
Amber: Ms.
Stoeger, my plastic
surgeon doesn't want me doing any activity where balls fly at my nose.
Dionne: [sarcastically]
Well, there goes
your social life.
Cher:
Christian said he'd call
the next day, but in boy time that meant Thursday.
Tai: Cher,
you're a
virgin?!
Cher: You
say that like it's a
bad thing.
Dionne:
Besides, the PC term is
"Hymenally challenged".
[after taking her
drivers test]
Cher: So,
how did I do?
DMV Tester:
How'd you do? Well,
let's just see shall we? You can't park, you can't change lanes, you
can't make right hand turns, you damaged private property and you
almost killed someone. Off hand, I'd say you failed.
Tai: Why
should I listen to
you, anyway? You're a virgin who can't drive.
Cher: That
was way harsh, Tai.
Cher: Would
you call me selfish?
Dionne: No,
not to your face.
Cher: I want
to do something
for humanity.
Josh: How
about sterilization?
Murray: Your
man Christian is a
cake boy!
Cher, Dionne:
A what?
Murray: He's
a disco-dancing,
Oscar Wilde reading, Streissand ticket holding friend of Dorothy, know
what I'm saying?
Cher: Uh-uh,
no way, not even!
Murray: Yes
even, he's gay!
Dionne: He
does like to shop,
Cher. And the boy can dress.
Tai: Do you
think she's pretty?
Cher: No,
she's a full-on Monet.
Tai: What's
a Monet?
Cher: It's
like a painting,
see? From far away, it's OK, but up close, it's a big old mess. Let's
ask a guy. Christian, what do you think of Amber?
Christian:
Hagsville.
Cher: See?
Crazy Stupid Love (2011)
Jacob: The
skin under your eyes is starting to look like Hugh Hefner's ball sack.
See more Crazy
Stupid Love Quotes
Despicable Me
(2010)
Gru: We are
going to pull of the TRUE crime of the century...we are going to steal
the MOON!
See
more Despicable Me Quotes
Gru: I
shrink the moon, I grab the moon, I sit on the toilet bowl...what?
[sees a child's drawing
on his plans, of himself sitting on a toilet bowl]
Gru: We
stole the Statue of Liberty...
[the minions cheer]
Gru: ...the
small one, from Las Vegas!
[the cheering stops]
Dr. Nefario: Here's
the new weapon you ordered.
[shoots minion with the
fart gun]
Gru: No,
no, no. I said DART gun!
Dr. Nefario:
Oh yes. Cause I was wondering...under what circumstances would we use
this?
Gru: Okay...
Gru: Do you
speak Spanish?
Miss Hattie:
Do I look like someone who speaks Spanish?
Gru: It's
just that your face is so...Como es burro.
[thinking it's a
compliment]
Miss Hattie: Oh!
Why, thank you!
Dumb
& Dumber (1994)
Harry: One
time, we
successfully
mated a bulldog with a Shih-Tzu.
Mary:
Really? That's weird.
Harry: Yeah,
we called it a
bullshit.
See
more Dumb
& Dumber Quotes
Harry: I
can't believe we drove
around all day, and there's not a single job in this town. There is
nothing, nada, zip!
Lloyd: Yeah!
Unless you wanna
work forty hours a week.
Harry: Nice
set of
hooters you got
there!
Mary: I beg
your pardon?
Harry: The
owls! They're
beautiful!
State Trooper: Pullover!
Harry: No,
it's a cardigan but
thanks for noticing.
Lloyd: Yeah,
killer boots man!
Harry: I
thought
the Rocky
Mountains would be a little rockier than this.
Lloyd: Yeah,
that John Denver
is full of shit, man.
Harry: Yeah
I called
her up, she
gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something, I
don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
Due
Date (2010)
[referring to his dad]
Ethan Tremblay: At
least he tasted good.
Peter Highman:
Not bad. Yeah, strong. It was uh...full flavored, robust blend.
Ethan Tremblay: He
really enjoyed coffee and in the end he was enjoyed as coffee. Circle
of life.
Peter Highman: Lion
King. All that.
See more Due Date Quotes
Return
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Funny Movie Quotes Part
1
| 2 | 3
Ferris
Bueller's
Day Off
(1986)
Ed Rooney:
Last thing I
need at this point in my career is fifteen hundred Ferris Bueller
disciples running around these halls. He jeopardizes my ability to
effectively govern this student body.
Grace: Well,
makes you look
like an ass is what he does, Ed.
See
more
Ferris Buller's Day Off Quotes
Ed Rooney: I
did not achieve
this position in life by having some snot-nosed punk leave my cheese
out in the wind.
Grace: Oh,
he's very
popular Ed. The
sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies,
dickheads, they all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude.
Ferris: Pardon
my
French, but
Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two
weeks you'd have a diamond.
[Rooney thinks he's just
caught
Ferris]
Ed Rooney:
Les jeux sont
faits. Translation: the game is up. Your ass is mine.
The
Hangover (2009)
Stu Price: This is so illegal.
Phil Wenneck: Can't
you see
the fun part in anything?
Stu Price: Yeah,
we're stuck
in traffic in a stolen police car with what is sure to be a missing
child in the back seat. Which part of this is fun?
See more The Hangover
Quotes
The Hangover Part II (2011)
Alan: I'm
going to miss you monkey. I wish monkeys could Skype. Maybe one day.
See more The Hangover
Part II Quotes
Happy Feet Two (2011)
Carmen: You,
me? Fat chance!
Ramon: I
have a chance! And it's fat!
See
more Happy Feet Two Quotes
Carmen: Ramon,
you're beautiful.
Ramon: Only
on the outside.
Will the Krill:
I'm moving up the food chain. I'm gonna go chew on something that has a
face!
Bill the Krill:
No! No! No! No!
[suddenly Will takes a
bite out of a giant seal]
Will the Krill: A
little chewy.
Bill the Krill: You
just nibbled on its butt!
The Help (2011)
Eugenia 'Skeeter' Phelan:
I got a job today.
Charlotte Phelan: Where?
Eugenia 'Skeeter' Phelan:
Writin' for the Jackson Journal.
Charlotte Phelan: Great.
You can write my obituary; Charlotte Phelan. Dead. Her
daughter still single!
Eugenia 'Skeeter' Phelan:
Mother, would it be really so bad if I never had a husband?
Charlotte Phelan:
Skeeter!
See more The Help
Quotes
Horrible
Bosses (2011)
[introducing himself]
Dean 'MF' Jones: Motherfucker
Jones.
Dale Arbus:
Your first name is Motherfucker?!
Dean 'MF' Jones:
Last name Jones. You got a problem with that?
Dale Arbus: No!
No! Cool name. Yeah. Is that like on your birth certificate?
[Kurt elbows Dale to
stop asking questions]
Dean 'MF' Jones: My
real name is Dean.
Nick Hendricks:
Dean Jones. That's the same name of the actor in Herbie The Love Bug.
Kurt Buckman:
Yeah, he's not gonna know who that is.
Dean 'MF' Jones:
I know who he is, bitch!
Kurt Buckman: Sorry.
Dean 'MF' Jones: I
can't walk around this fuckin' neighborhood
with that Disney-assed name!
See more Horrible
Bosses Quotes
Jack and Jill (2011)
Jill: Are
you going bald?
Jack: Huh?
Jill: No!
No! No! You're getting fatter and your hair doesn't realize it needs to
cover more face.
See
more Jack and Jill Quotes
Office Worker #1:
What's this about a twin?
Office Worker #2: Jack
here has a twin sister.
Office Worker #1: Identical
or paternal?
Office Worker #2: Uh...nocturnal,
like a bat.
Al Pacino:
Your sister and I grew up on the same street. When I look at her I see
me.
Jack: When
I look at her I see me too.
Erin: Some
twins can feel when the other one's hurt.
[Jill slaps herself in
the face and looks at Jack to see if he feels the pain]
Jack: I
didn't feel it.
[Jill slaps herself in
the face a little harder]
Jack: Little
harder.
[Jill slaps herself in
the face more harder]
Erin: No,
Jill, stop it! He's kidding.
Jill: What?!
[suddenly Gary punches
Jill hard in the face]
Gary: Feel
that, daddy?
Jack: I
actually did feel something there. Pride in my son.
Joyful Noise (2012)
G.G. Sparrow:
Well I am who I am!
Vi Rose Hill:
Well maybe you were, five procedures ago.
See
more Joyful Noise Quotes
[to Vi Rose]
G.G. Sparrow: Who
cares if I got a few little nips and tucks? God didn't make plastic
surgeons so they could starve!
[as G.G. is trying to
hit Vi Rose]
Vi Rose Hill: Quit
it with those nails, Edward Scissorhands!
Juno
(2007)
Leah: Dude,
I think it's best
to just tell 'em.
Juno MacGuff:
I'm Pregnant.
Bren: Oh,
God.
Juno MacGuff:
But, uh ah, I'm
going to give it up for adoption and I already found the perfect
couple, they're going to pay for the medical expenses and everything.
And...and what...in thirty or odd weeks we can just pretend that this
never happened.
Mac MacGuff:
You're pregnant?
Juno MacGuff: I'm
sorry. I'm
sorry...and if it is any consolation I have heartburn that is radiating
in my knee caps and I haven't taken a dump since Wednesday...morning.
See
more Juno
Quotes
[after Juno's parents
have found out
she's pregnant]
Mac MacGuff: Did
you see that
coming?
Bren:
Yeah...but I was hoping
she was expelled, or into hard drugs.
Mac MacGuff:
That was my first
instinct too. Or a DWI...anything but this!
Rollo: You
better
pay for that
pee-stick when you're done with it. Don't think it's yours just because
you marked it with your urine!
Paulie Bleeker:
I still have
your underwear.
Juno MacGuff:
I still have your
virginity.
Juno MacGuff: Bleeker's
mom was
possibly attractive once, but now she looks like a Hobbit. You know,
the fat one, that was in the Goonies.
Juno MacGuff:
Uhhh,
I hate it when
adults use the term "sexually active." What does it even mean? Am I
gonna like deactivate some day or is it a permanent state of being?
The King's
Speech (2010)
Lionel Logue:
Do you know any jokes?
King George VI:
Timing
isn't my strong suit.
Lionel Logue:
Do you know the "f" word?
King George VI:
Ffff... fornication?
Kung Fu Panda 2 (2011)
[after Po and his gang
stop the wolf soldiers from raiding the village]
Bunny Fan:
The Dragon Warrior!
Wolf Boss:
The panda? That's impossible!
Po: My fist
hungers for justice!
[his stomach growls
loudly]
Po: That was
my...fist.
See more Kung Fu
Panda 2 Quotes
Life
of Brian (1979)
Brian's mother: He's not the Messiah. He's a very
naughty boy!
See
more Life of Brian Quotes
Little
Fockers (2010)
[Greg
answers Jack's call]
Greg Focker: Hey,
grandpa Jack.
Jack Byrnes: Greg,
this is Jack Byrnes.
Greg Focker: Yeah,
I know. I
just...I could tell from the caller ID.
Jack Byrnes: Greg,
stop talking
and listen. There's always been a patriotic to lead our family through
good times and bad. I've come to realize that next in line to the
Byrnes throne is you. So I ask you, Greg, are you prepared to be...the
God Focker?
[Greg start to laugh]
Jack Byrnes:
Are you laughing?
Greg Focker: Yeah...I
know. I'm
just...I was making...no!
Jack Byrnes: Because
this is no
laughing matter, Focker.
Little
Miss Sunshine (2006)
Richard:
Sarcasm is the refuge of losers.
Frank: [sarcastically] It
is? Really?
Richard:
Sarcasm is losers
trying to bring winners down to their level.
Frank: [sarcastically]
Wow, Richard,
you've really opened my eyes to what a loser I am. How much do I owe
you for those pearls of wisdom?
Richard: Oh,
that ones on the
house.
See
more Little
Miss Sunshine Quotes
[getting pulled over by
the police]
Richard: Oh my God, I'm getting pulled over. Everyone,
just...pretend to be normal.
Grandpa:
Jesus, I'm tired. I'm
so fucking tired. You know how tired I am? If a girl came up to me and
begged me to fuck her, I couldn't do it. That's how tired I am.
Dwayne: You
know what? Fuck
beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. You
know, school, then college, then work, fuck that. And fuck the air
force academy. If I wanna fly, I'll find a way to fly. You do what you
love, and fuck the rest.
Frank: I'm
glad you're talking
again, Dwayne. You're not nearly as stupid as you look.
The
Man with Two Brains (1983)
Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr:
Ladies
and gentlemen, I can envision a day when the brains of brilliant men
can be kept alive in the bodies of dumb people!
Dr. Necessiter's butler: Can
I get you anything more,
doctor?
I'm about to retire.
Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr:
Really?
You seem so young.
Megamind
(2010)
[after Hal has been
transformed into a superhero]
Hal: Is
this some kind of dream?
[Megamind's disguised as
Jor-El]
Megamind:
This is a dream come true. You've been blessed with unfathomable power.
Hal: What
kind of power?
Megamind:
Unfathomable. It's unf...with...without fathom.
Hal: Wow!
See more Megamind Quotes
Moneyball (2011)
Billy Beane:
There are rich teams and there are poor teams, then there's fifty feet
of crap, and then there's us.
See
more Moneyball Quotes
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