Starring: Ed Helms, Terrence Little Gardenhigh, Taraji P. Henson, Betty Gilpin, RonReaco Lee, Andrew Bachelor, David Alan Grier
Netflix’s action comedy directed by Michael Dowse. The story follows police officer James Coffee (Ed Helms), who while enjoying his new relationship with Vanessa Manning (Taraji P. Henson), her twelve year-old son, Kareem (Terrence Little Gardenhigh), plots their break-up. Attempting to scare away Coffee for good, Kareem tries to hire criminal fugitives to take him out, but accidentally exposes a secret network of criminal activity, making his family its latest target. To protect Vanessa, Kareem teams up with Coffee, the partner he never wanted, for a dangerous chase across Detroit.
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We’ll add the best quotes once the movie is released and we’ve had a chance to watch it, but for now here’s a small selection.
[on the phone to Coffee]
Vanessa Manning: Kareem needs to go by a friend’s house after school. And he asked that you pick him up.
James Coffee: When my mom dated this one guy, we became BFFs.
Kareem: You were BFFs with a grown-a** man? There’s literally documentaries on Netflix about why that’s so sick and f**ked up.
James Coffee: I think that’s a different…
Kareem: You expect us to be BF… F**k out of my face, man.
[gets out of the car]
James Coffee: Uh, good talk.
Kareem: Welcome back to my channel. Remember when I told you about that white cop who was humping my mom? Well, now you see what happens when you f**k with me.
[referring to Coffee]
Kareem: Pig stuck his d*ck in the wrong blanket.
[Kareem sees some thugs]
Henchman #1: They said that you been talking about the deal!
[he fires a couple of shots of his gun]
Kareem: Oh, sh*t!
Henchman #1: Hey, who’s back there?
James Coffee: Kareem, run!
[after the thugs chase them and they are forced to hide in the boot of the car]
Kareem: Back up, yoh. Your d*ck is rubbing against my a**.
James Coffee: Well then turns towards me.
Kareem: I don’t want to rub d*cks either!
Vanessa Manning: Is everything okay?
James Coffee: This all started when your son tried to have me killed because he saw us having sex this morning! Now, the most dangerous drug dealers in Detroit are trying to kill us!
Vanessa Manning: Oh, why did I date a white guy?! My friend, Sharon, was right. All of you are f**ked up!
[one of the thugs rings the doorbell]
Henchman #1: What the f**k you doing? Why are you f**king ringing the doorbell?
Henchman #2: Just…
Henchman #1: We don’t touch sh*t!
Henchman #3: No fingerprints, dog!
Henchman #1: Thank you!
[as they are sat in a strip club]
Kareem: Yeah, this is my f**king scene right here.
James Coffee: Tell your mom we went to Chuck E. Cheese.
Kareem: To be honest, women scare the sh*t out of me. I mean, where do you even start?
[to the stripper walking past them]
James Coffee: Excuse me. My friend here would like to practice talking with a lady.
Kareem: Tell me about yourself.
Stripper: I was born and raised in Detroit, and I have an Associate’s Degree in Biology, and I’m studying to be a veterinarian.
Kareem: How much to look at your…
James Coffee: No!
James Coffee: You have the right to remain silent!
Vanessa Manning: Aren’t you trained for sh*t like this?
James Coffee: Let’s do this!
What do you think of Coffee & Kareem quotes? Let us know what you think in the comments below as we’d love to know.