Starring: Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, Michael Caine, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Gary Oldman, Morgan Freeman, Eric Roberts, Chin Han, Ritchie Coster
OUR RATING: ★★★★★
Superhero action sequel directed and co-written by Christopher Nolan. The story follows Batman/Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) in his continuing war on crime. With the help of allies Lt. Jim Gordon (Gary Oldman) and DA Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart), Batman has been able to keep a tight lid on crime in Gotham City. But when a menace knows as the Joker (Heath Ledger) emerges, he starts to wreak havoc and chaos on the people of Gotham. Batman must accept one of the greatest psychological and physical tests of his ability to fight injustice and begins to tread a fine line between heroism and vigilantism.REVIEWS
Our Favourite Quotes:'If you're good at something, never do it for free.' - The Joker (The Dark Knight) Click To Tweet 'Some men just want to watch the world burn.' - Alfred Pennyworth (The Dark Knight) Click To Tweet 'You complete me.' - The Joker (The Dark Knight) Click To Tweet 'In their last moments, people show you who they really are.' - The Joker (The Dark Knight) Click To Tweet 'Nobody panics when things go 'according to plan'. Even if the plan is horrifying!' - The Joker (The Dark Knight) Click To Tweet 'Sometimes people deserve to have their faith rewarded.' - Batman (The Dark Knight) Click To Tweet
Best Quotes (Total Quotes: 88)
[first lines; before the bank heist]
Grumpy: Three of a kind, let’s do this.
Chuckles: That’s it, three guys?
Grumpy: Two guys on the roof. Every guy gets a share. Five shares is plenty.
Chuckles: Six shares, don’t forget the guy who planned the job.
Grumpy: He thinks he can sit it out and still take a slice? I know why they call him “The Joker.”
Happy: So why do they call him “The Joker”?
Dopey: I heard he wears make-up.
Dopey: Yeah, to scare people. You know, war paint.
[during the bank heist, Bozo subdues the terrified customers and employees by putting grenades in their hands and pulling the pins]
Grumpy: Obviously, we don’t want you doing anything with your hands other than holding on for dear life!
[during a bank heist, the Joker has tricked all his men into killing each other, one after the other. One of the last ones, getting wise, points his gun at another thug, who still has his mask on]
Grumpy: I’m betting The Joker told you to kill me soon as we loaded the cash.
Bozo: No. No, no, no. I kill the bus driver.
Grumpy: [confused] Bus driver? What bus dri…?
[a school bus drives through the bank wall and kills Grumpy]
Gotham National Bank Manager: Oh, criminals in this town used to believe in things. Honor. Respect. Look at you! What do you believe in, huh? What do you believe in?!
[Bozo leans down and sticks a grenade in the manager’s mouth]
Bozo: I believe whatever doesn’t kill you, simply makes you…
[Bozo takes off his mask]
The Joker: …stranger.
[Batman has just fought off Scarecrow and a group of Batman want tobes]
Batman: Don’t let me find you out here again.
Brian Douglas: We’re trying to help you!
Batman: I don’t need help.
Dr. Jonathan Crane: Not in my diagnosis!
Brian Douglas: What gives you the right? What’s the difference between you and me?
[Batman lowers himself into the Batmobile]
Batman: I’m not wearing hockey pads!
Alfred Pennyworth: Be nice when Wayne Manor’s rebuilt, you can swap not sleeping in a penthouse for not sleeping in a mansion.
Bruce Wayne: More copycats last night, Alfred, with guns.
Alfred Pennyworth: Why don’t you hire them and take the weekend off?
Alfred Pennyworth: Know your limits, Master Wayne.
Bruce Wayne: Batman has no limits.
Alfred Pennyworth: Well, you do, sir.
Bruce Wayne: Well, can’t afford to know them.
[to Harvey Dent]
Lt. James Gordon: You don’t have to sell me Dent. We all know you’re Gotham’s White Knight.
Bruce Wayne: I need a new suit.
Lucius Fox: Yeah, three buttons is a little ’90’s, Mr. Wayne.
Bruce Wayne: I’m not talking fashion, Mr. Fox, so much as function.
[Wayne hands him a diagram]
Lucius Fox: You want to be able to turn your head.
Bruce Wayne: Sure would make backing out of the driveway easier.
Harvey Dent: The famous Bruce Wayne. Rachel’s told me everything about you.
Bruce Wayne: I certainly hope not.
[after running into Harvey and Rachel at a restaurant]
Bruce Wayne: So, let’s put a couple tables together.
Harvey Dent: I’m not sure they’ll let us.
Bruce Wayne: Oh, they should. I own the place.
Harvey Dent: When their enemies were at the gates, the Romans would suspend democracy and appoint one man to protect the city. It wasn’t considered an honor, it was considered a public service.
Rachel Dawes: Harvey, the last man who they appointed to protect the Republic was named Caesar and he never gave up his power.
Harvey Dent: Okay, fine. You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.
[during the mobsters meeting]
The Chechen: Who’s stupid enough to steal from us?
Salvatore Maroni: Two-bit whack-job. Wears a cheap purple suit and make-up. He’s not the problem. He’s a nobody.
[Lau announces that he’s removed all the mob’s cash from their banks before the police raid, and stashed them in a secure location]
Lau: For obvious reasons I couldn’t wait for your permission. Rest assured, your money is safe.
[from outside comes the sound of loud, fake laughter. The mob bosses turn and see the Joker enter]
The Joker: I thought my jokes were bad.
Gambol: Give me one reason why I shouldn’t have my boy here pull your head off.
The Joker: How about a magic trick?
[pulls out a pencil and sticks it upright into the table]
The Joker: I’m going to make this pencil disappear.
[Gambol’s thug walks over to kill The Joker, who quickly slams his face into the pencil and kills him]
The Joker: Ta-daa! It’s, it’s gone.
The Joker: Let’s wind the clocks back a year. These cops and lawyers wouldn’t dare cross any of you. I mean, what happened? Did your balls drop off? Hm? You see, a guy like me…
[the mobsters laugh but the Joker ignore this and continues]
The Joker: A guy like me, look, listen. I know why you choose to have your little group therapy sessions in broad daylight. I know why you’re afraid to go out at night. The Batman. See, Batman has shown Gotham your true colors, unfortunately. Dent? He’s just the beginning. And as for the television’s so called “plan?”
[indicates Lau on the video phone]
The Joker: Batman has no jurisdiction. He’ll find him and make him squeal! I know the squealers when I see them, and…
[he indicates Lau again, who hurriedly turns off the picture]
The Chechen: What do you propose?
The Joker: It’s simple. We, uh, kill the Batman.
[the mobsters laugh]
Salvatore Maroni: If it’s so simple, why haven’t you done it already?
The Joker: If you’re good at something, never do it for free.
Gambol: You’re crazy.
The Joker: I’m not. No, I’m not. If we don’t deal with this now, soon little, uh, Gambol here won’t be able to get a nickel for his grandma.
Gambol: Enough from the clown!
[reveals the inside of his jacket, which has hand grenades with the pins attached to a thread tied to the Joker’s finger]
The Joker: Ah-ta-ta-ta-ta! Let’s not “blow” this out of proportion.
Gambol: You think you can steal from us and just walk away?
The Joker: Yeah.
The Joker: So listen, why don’t you give me a call when you start taking things a little more seriously.
[takes out his Joker card and places on the table]
Lucius Fox: Now for high altitude jumps you’re going to need oxygen and stabilizers. Now I must say compared to your usual requests, jumping out of an airplane is pretty straightforward.
Bruce Wayne: And what about getting back into the plane?
Lucius Fox: I’d recommend a good travel agent.
Bruce Wayne: Without it landing.
Lucius Fox: Now that’s more like it, Mr. Wayne. The CIA had a program back in the 60’s for getting their people out of hot spots called Sky Hook. We could look into that.
[examining one of the gauntlets for his new and improved Bat suit, Bruce presses a button, and the spikes are launched across the room, narrowly missing Fox before they bury themselves in the wall]
Lucius Fox: Perhaps you should read the instructions first.
Bruce Wayne: [sheepish] Yeah.
[on Wayne’s Yacht on the Caribbean with the Moscow Ballerinas]
Bruce Wayne: You look tired, Alfred. You’ll be all right without me?
[Alfred looks at all the sunbathing women]
Alfred Pennyworth: You can tell me the Russian for, “apply your own bloody suntan lotion.”
[holding a knife inside Gambol’s mouth]
The Joker: want to know how I got these scars? My father was a drinker. And a fiend. And one night he goes off crazier than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn’t like that. Not-one-bit. So, me watching, he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it! He turns to me, and he says, “Why so serious, son?” Comes at me with the knife, “Why so serious?” He sticks the blade in my mouth, “Let’s put a smile on that face!” And…
[looks sidelong at one of Gambol’s thug, watching the whole thing in horror]
The Joker: Why so serious?
[Joker flicks his wrist and Gambol goes down]
[to Gambol’s thugs, being held helpless]
The Joker: Now, our operation is small, but there’s a lot of potential for “aggressive” expansion. So, which one of you fine gentlemen would like to join our team? Oh, there’s only one spot open right now, so we’re going to have…
[breaks pool cue over knee]
The Joker: …tryouts.
[The Joker throws the broken pool cue in the middle of the thugs]
The Joker: Make it fast.
[Joker has Brain Douglas captured and is recording him]
The Joker: Tell them your name.
Brian: Brian Douglas.
The Joker: Are you the real Batman?
The Joker: No?
The Joker: No? Then why do you dress up like him?
[grabs Brian’s mask and dangles it in front of the camera]
The Joker: Whooo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Brian: Because he’s a symbol that we don’t have to be afraid of scum like you.
The Joker: Yeah you do, Brian. You really do. Yeah. Oh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. So, you think Batman’s made Gotham a better place? Hmm? Look at me. Look at me!
[turns camera to himself]
The Joker: You see this is how crazy Batman’s made Gotham! You want order in Gotham? Batman must take off his mask and turn himself in. Oh, and every day he doesn’t, people will die. Starting tonight. I’m a man of my word.
[at the fund raising party in Bruce Wayne’s Penthouse]
Alfred Pennyworth: A little liquid courage, Mr. Dent?
Harvey Dent: Alfred, right?
Alfred Pennyworth: That’s right, sir.
Harvey Dent: Yeah, Rachel talks about you all the time. You’ve known her, her whole life!
Alfred Pennyworth: Oh, not yet, sir.
Harvey Dent: [laughs] Any psychotic ex-boyfriends I should be aware of?
Alfred Pennyworth: [smiles] Oh, you have no idea.
Bruce Wayne: You know that day that you once told me about, when Gotham would no longer need Batman? It’s coming.
Rachel Dawes: Bruce. You can’t ask me to wait for that.
Bruce Wayne: It’s happening now. Harvey is that hero. He locked up half of the city’s criminals, and he did it without wearing a mask. Gotham needs a hero with a face.
Harvey Dent: You cannot leave me alone with these people.
Rachel Dawes: The whole mob’s after you, and you’re worried about these guys?
Harvey Dent: Yeah, compared to this, the mob doesn’t scare me.
The Joker: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. We are tonight’s entertainment! I only have one question. Where is Harvey Dent?
[nobody responds, the Joker walks around the room pointing with his shotgun at everyone]
Gentleman at Party: We’re not intimidated by thugs!
The Joker: You know, you remind me of my father.
[Joker pulls out his switchblade and brings it to the Gentleman’s mouth]
The Joker: I hated my father!
Rachel Dawes: Okay, stop!
[turns to face Rachel, tosses the Gentleman to his thugs and approaches Rachel, adjusting his hair with the knife]
The Joker: Well, hello, beautiful. You must be Harvey’s squeeze, hm? And you are beautiful.
[Joker hovers around the incredibly nervous Rachel]
The Joker: Well, you look nervous. Is it the scars? You want to know how I got them?
[he grabs Rachel’s head and positions the knife by her mouth]
The Joker: Come here. Hey! Look at me. So I had a wife, beautiful, like you, who tells me I worry too much. Who tells me I ought to smile more. Who gambles and gets in deep with the sharks. Look at me! One day, they carve her face. And we have no money for surgeries. She can’t take it. I just want to see her smile again, hm? I just want her to know that I don’t care about the scars. So I stick a razor in my mouth and do this…
[Joker mimics slicing his mouth open with his tongue]
The Joker: …to myself. And you know what? She can’t stand the sight of me! She leaves. Now I see the funny side. Now I’m always smiling!
[Rachel knees the Joker in the groin, he merely laughs it off]
The Joker: A little fight in you. I like that.
Batman: Then you’re going to love me.
[Batman attacks him]
Batman: Let her go!
[Joker dangles Rachel out of a window]
The Joker: Very poor choice of words…
[then let’s Rachel drop]
[after Batman saves Rachel from falling out of a window]
Batman: Are you alright?
Rachel Dawes: Let’s not do that again.
Bruce Wayne: Targeting me won’t get their money back. I knew the mob wouldn’t go down without a fight, but this is different. They crossed the line.
Alfred Pennyworth: You crossed the line first, sir. You squeezed them, you hammered them to the point of desperation. And in their desperation they turned to a man they didn’t fully understand.
Bruce Wayne: Criminals aren’t complicated, Alfred. We just need to figure out what he’s after.
Alfred Pennyworth: With respect, Master Wayne, perhaps this is a man that you don’t fully understand either.
Alfred Pennyworth: A long time ago, I was in Burma, my friends and I were working for the local government. They were trying to buy the loyalty of the tribal leaders by bribing them with precious stones. But their caravans were being raided in a forest north of Rangoon by a bandit. So we went looking for the stones. But in six months, we never met anyone who traded with him. One day I saw a child playing with a ruby the size of a tangerine. The bandit had been throwing them away.
Bruce Wayne: So why steal them?
Alfred Pennyworth: Because he thought it was good sport. Because some men aren’t looking for anything logical, like money. They can’t be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.
[Wayne Enterprises accountant Coleman Reese believes that he’s discovered Batman’s secret identity]
Lucius Fox: Let me get this straight, you think that your client, one of the wealthiest, most powerful men in the world, is secretly a vigilante who spends his nights beating criminals to a pulp with his bare hands. And your plan is to blackmail this person?
[Fox smiles at Reese]
Lucius Fox: Good luck.
Maroni’s Mistress: Can’t we go someplace quieter? We can’t hear each other talk.
Salvatore Maroni: What makes you think I want to hear you talk?
[after Gordon has been seen shot and killed during the Mayor’s speech to the grieving police offer families]
Harvey Dent: Rachel listen to me, you’re not safe there.
Rachel Dawes: This is Gordon’s unit…
Harvey Dent: Gordon’s gone Rachel.
Rachel Dawes: He vouched for these men.
Harvey Dent: And he’s gone. The Jokers named you next. God is there someone, is there anyone in this town you can trust?
Rachel Dawes: Bruce, we can trust Bruce Wayne.
[Batman is holding Maroni out over a ledge]
Batman: I want The Joker.
Salvatore Maroni: From one professional to another, if you’re trying to scare somebody, pick a better spot. From this height, the fall wouldn’t kill me.
Batman: I’m counting on it.
[he drops Maroni off the ledge, breaking his legs]
[after breaking Maroni’s Legs from dropping him over a ledge]
Batman: Where is he?
Salvatore Maroni: I don’t know. He found us!
Batman: He must have friends!
Salvatore Maroni: Friends? Have you met this guy?
Batman: Someone knows where he is.
Salvatore Maroni: Nobody’s going to tell you nothing. They’re wise to your act. You got rules. The Joker, he’s got no rules. Nobody’s going to cross him for you. You want this guy, you got one way. And you already know what that is. Just take off that mask and let him come find you. Or do you want to let a couple more people get killed while you make your mind?
[Harvey tosses his coin trying to torture one of Joker’s thugs in getting him to give information about the Joker]
Batman: You’d leave a man’s life to chance?
Harvey Dent: Not exactly.
Harvey Dent: The Joker killed Gordon. He’s going to kill Rachel.
Batman: You’re the symbol of hope I could never be. Your stand against organized crime is the first legitimate ray of light that Gotham in decades. If anyone saw this, everything would be undone, all the criminals you pulled off the streets would be released and Jim Gordon will have died for nothing. You’re going to hold a press conference tomorrow morning.
Harvey Dent: Why?
Batman: No one else will die because of me. Gotham’s in your hands now.
Harvey Dent: You can’t…
[Batman walks away]
Harvey Dent: You can’t give in. You can’t give in!
Bruce Wayne: You once told me that if the day came that I was finished that we’d be together.
Rachel Dawes: Bruce, don’t make me your one hope for a normal life.
Bruce Wayne: Did you mean it?
Rachel Dawes: Yes.
[they kiss and Bruce then starts to walk away from her]
Rachel Dawes: Bruce, if you turn yourself in, they’re not going to let us be together.
Bruce Wayne: People are dying, Alfred. What would you have me do?
Alfred Pennyworth: Endure, Master Wayne. Take it. They’ll hate you for it, but that’s the point of Batman, he can be the outcast. He can make the choice that no one else can make, the right choice.
Bruce Wayne: Well today I found out what Batman can’t do. He can’t endure this. Today you get to say “I told you so.”
Alfred Pennyworth: Today, I don’t want to.
[pauses for several moments]
Alfred Pennyworth: But I did bloody tell you.
Alfred Pennyworth: I suppose they’re going to lock me up as well. As your accomplice…
Bruce Wayne: Accomplice? I’m going to tell them the whole thing was your idea.
[Harvey talking at the press conference]
Harvey Dent: The night is darkest just before the dawn. I promise you, the dawn is coming.
Harvey Dent: So be it. Take the Batman into custody.
[everyone at the press conference looks confused]
Harvey Dent: I am the Batman.
[Dent throws his coin to Rachel and she discovers Dent’s coin is two-faced]
Rachel Dawes: You make your own luck.
[the Batpod emerges from an alleyway]
The Joker: Now there’s a Batman!
[stumbles out of wrecked truck; to Batman]
The Joker: Come on, come on, come on, I want you to do it, I want you to do it. Come on, hit me. Hit me!
[we see Gordon back from the dead; to The Joker]
Lt. James Gordon: We got you, you son of a bitch!
[Gordon gets Harvey out of the back of the truck Joker had kept him in]
Harvey Dent: Gordon! You do like to play things pretty close to the chest.
Lt. James Gordon: We got him Harvey.
[referring to The Joker]
Mayor: What do we got?
Lt. James Gordon: Nothing. No matches on prints, DNA, dental. Clothing is custom, no labels. Nothing in his pockets but knives and lint. No name, no other alias.
James Gordon Jr.: Did Batman save you, Daddy?
Lt. James Gordon: Actually, this time I saved him.
[Gordon is interrogating the Joker to find out where Harvey Dent has been taken]
Lt. James Gordon: Where is he?
The Joker: What’s the time?
Lt. James Gordon: What difference does that make?
The Joker: Well, depending on the time, he may in one spot, or several.
Lt. James Gordon: If we’re going to play games…
[takes off Joker’s handcuffs]
Lt. James Gordon: I’m going to need a cup of coffee.
The Joker: Ah, the good cop, bad cop routine?
Lt. James Gordon: Not exactly.
[Gordon steps out of the room, the overhead lights come on. Batman is behind The Joker, he slams Joker’s head on the table]
The Joker: Never start with the head, the victim gets all fuzzy.
Batman: You wanted me, here I am.
The Joker: I wanted to see what you’d do. And you didn’t disappoint, you let five people die. Then, you let Dent take your place. Even to a guy like me, that’s cold…
Batman: Then why do you want to kill me?
The Joker: [laughs] I don’t, I don’t want to kill you! What would I do without you? Go back to ripping off mob dealers? No, no, no! No. You, you complete me.
Batman: You’re garbage who kills for money.
The Joker: Don’t talk like one of them. You’re not! Even if you’d like to be. To them, you’re just a freak, like me! They need you right now, but when they don’t, they’ll cast you out, like a leper! You see, their morals, their code, it’s a bad joke. Dropped at the first sign of trouble. They’re only as good as the world allows them to be. I’ll show you. When the chips are down, these, uh, these civilized people, they’ll eat each other. See, I’m not a monster. I’m just ahead of the curve.
Batman: Where’s Dent?
The Joker: You have all these rules and you think they’ll save you!
[as Batman slams Joker into the wall]
Lt. James Gordon: He’s in control.
Batman: I have one rule.
The Joker: Oh, then that’s the rule you’ll have to break to know the truth.
Batman: Which is?
The Joker: The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules.
[mimicking Batman’s voice]
The Joker: And tonight you’re going to break your one rule.
Batman: I’m considering it.
The Joker: Oh, there’s only minutes left, so you’re going to have to play my little game if you want to save one of them.
[The Joker has just indicated that his has taken both Harvey Dent and Rachel Dawes]
The Joker: You know, for a while there I though you really were Dent, the way you threw yourself after her…
[Batman loses control and starts to punch the Joker]
The Joker: Look at you go! Does Harvey know about you and his little bunny?
[slams Joker into mirror]
Batman: Where are they?!
The Joker: Killing is making a choice…
Batman: Where are they?!
The Joker: Choose between one life or the other. Your friend, the district attorney. Or his blushing bride to be.
[Batman punches him again]
The Joker: [laughs] You have nothing, nothing to threaten me with. Nothing to do with all your strength. Don’t worry I’m going to tell you where they are. Both of them, and that’s the point, you’ll have to choose. He’s at 250 52ND Street and she’s on Avenue X, at Cicero.
[to Det. Stephens]
The Joker: Do you want to know why I use a knife? Guns are too quick. You can’t savor all the little emotions. In, you see, in their last moments, people show you who they really are. So in a way, I know your friends better than you ever did. Would you like to know which of them were cowards?
[after the tragic ending of Harvey Dent and Rachel Dawes capture]
Lt. James Gordon: The Joker planned to be caught. He wanted me to lock him up in the M.C.U.
[Alfred opens Rachel’s letter Bruce and starts to read it]
Rachel Dawes: [voice over] Dear Bruce, I need to be honest and clear. I’m going to marry Harvey Dent. I love him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. When I told you that if Gotham no longer needed Batman we could be together, I meant it. But now I’m sure the day won’t come when you no longer need Batman. I hope it does and if it does I will be there, but as your friend. I’m sorry to let you down. If you lose your faith in me, please keep your faith in people. Love, now and always, Rachel.
[after Rachel’s death]
Bruce Wayne: Did I bring this on her? I was meant to inspire good. Not madness, not death.
Alfred Pennyworth: You have inspired good, but you spat in the faces of Gotham’s criminals. Didn’t you think there might be some casualties? Things were always going to get worse before they got better.
Bruce Wayne: She was going to wait for me Alfred. Dent doesn’t know. He can never know.
[Alfred takes Rachel’s letter off the food tray]
Bruce Wayne: What’s that?
Alfred Pennyworth: It can wait.
Bruce Wayne: That bandit, in the forest in Burma, did you catch him?
Alfred Pennyworth: Yes.
Bruce Wayne: How?
Alfred Pennyworth: We burned the forest down.
Harvey Dent: Remember that name you all had for me when I was at Internal Affairs? What was it, Gordon?
Lt. James Gordon: Harvey, I…
Harvey Dent: Say it. SAY IT!
Lt. James Gordon: Two-Face. Harvey Two-Face.
[Harvey turns his head, revealing the horribly burnt scarred side of his face]
Harvey Dent: Why should I hide who I am?
[after visiting the scarred Dent in the hospital, Gordon emerges and sees Maroni there, leaning on a cane and looks at him coldly]
Salvatore Maroni: This is crazy, this is too much.
Lt. James Gordon: You should have thought of that before you let that clown out of the box.
The Chechen: What you do with all your money?
The Joker: You see, I’m a guy of simple tastes. I enjoy dynamite, and gunpowder, and gasoline!
[the Chechen watches, appalled, as Joker’s thugs pour gasoline on his mountain of cash]
The Joker: And you know the thing that they have in common? They’re cheap!
[takes The Chechen’s cigar out of his mouth and throws it onto the mountain of cash]
The Joker: I’m only burning my half. All you care about is money. This town deserves a better class of criminal. And I’m going to give it to them!
Alfred Pennyworth: Will you be wanting the Batpod, sir?
Bruce Wayne: In the middle of the day, Alfred? Not very subtle.
Alfred Pennyworth: The Lamborghini, then.
[with deadpan sarcasm]
Alfred Pennyworth: Much more subtle.
Two-Face: Your men, your plan!
The Joker: Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I’m a dog chasing cars. I wouldn’t know what to do with one if I caught it. You know, I just do things. The mob has plans, the cops have plans, Gordon’s got plans. You know, they’re schemers. Schemers trying to control their little worlds. I’m not a schemer. I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control things really are. So, when I say, uh, come here.
[takes Two-Face’s hand into his own]
The Joker: When I say that you and your girlfriend was nothing personal, you know that I’m telling the truth.
The Joker: It’s the schemers that put you where you are. You were a schemer, you had plans, and look where that got you.
[Two-Face tries to grab the Joker]
The Joker: I just did what I do best. I took your little plan and I turned it on itself. Look what I did to this city with a few drums of gas and a couple of bullets. Hmm? You know, you know what I’ve noticed? Nobody panics when things go “according to plan”. Even if the plan is horrifying! If, tomorrow, I tell the press that, like, a gang banger will get shot, or a truckload of soldiers will be blown up, nobody panics, because it’s all “part of the plan.” But when I say that one little old mayor will die, well then everyone loses their minds!
[Joker hands Two-Face a gun and points it at himself]
The Joker: Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos. Oh, and you know the thing about chaos? It’s fair!
[still holding the gun, Two-Face pauses and takes out his coin he shows the unscarred side of the coin]
Two-Face: You live.
The Joker: Mm-hmm.
[Two-Face turns coin to show the scarred side]
Two-Face: You die.
The Joker: Mmm, now we’re talking.
Detective Wuertz: Dent. Jesus. I thought you was dead.
[looking at the array of thousands of tiny monitors in Wayne Enterprises Research and Development Labs]
Batman: Beautiful, isn’t it?
Lucius Fox: Beautiful. Unethical. Dangerous. You’ve turned every cellphone in Gotham into a microphone.
Batman: And a high-frequency generator-receiver.
Lucius Fox: You took my sonar concept and applied it to every phone in the city. With half the city feeding you sonar, you can image all of Gotham. This is wrong.
Batman: I’ve got to find this man, Lucius.
Lucius Fox: At what cost?
Batman: The database is null-key encrypted. It can only be accessed by one person.
Lucius Fox: This is too much power for one person.
Batman: That’s why I gave it to you. Only you can use it.
Lucius Fox: Spying on thirty million people isn’t part of my job description.
Lucius Fox: I’ll help you this one time, but consider this my resignation. As long as this machine is at Wayne Enterprises I won’t be here.
Batman: When you’re finished, type in your name.
[in Maroni’s Limo]
Salvatore Maroni: Look, take it up with the Joker. He killed your woman, who made you like this.
Two-Face: The Joker’s just a mad dog. I want whoever let him off the leash.
Two-Face: Who picked up Rachel? It must have been someone she trusted.
Salvatore Maroni: Look, if I tell you, will you let me go?
Two-Face: It can’t hurt your chances.
Salvatore Maroni: It was Ramirez.
[Two-Face pulls the coin out and cocks his gun]
Salvatore Maroni: [panicking] But you said…
Two-Face: I said it couldn’t hurt your chances.
[flips his coin which lands on the unscarred side]
Two-Face: You’re a lucky man.
[flips his coin again which now lands on the scarred side]
Two-Face: He’s not.
Salvatore Maroni: Who?
Two-Face: Your driver.
[buckles his seat belt and shoots the driver in the back, the car goes flying off the road]
[over the PA addressing the passengers in the two ferries]
The Joker: Tonight you’re all going to be part of a social experiment. Through the magic of diesel fuel and ammonium nitrate, I’m ready right now to blow you all sky high. Anyone attempts to get off their boat, you all die. Each of you has a remote to blow up the other boat. At midnight, I blow you all up. If, however, one of you presses the button, I’ll let that boat live. So, who’s it going to be; Harvey Dent’s most wanted scumbag collection, or the sweet and innocent civilians? You choose, oh, and you might want to decide quickly, because the people on the other boat might not be quite so noble.
Lt. James Gordon: Harvey, where’s my family?
Two-Face: Where my family died.
[while fighting with Batman, Joker knocks him down and raises a knife]
The Joker: All the old familiar places.
[Joker pins Batman at the edge of the building, in view of the two rigged ferries]
The Joker: We really should stop this fighting, we’ll miss the fireworks!
Batman: There won’t be any fireworks!
The Joker: And here we go!
[silence. Nothing happens. Confused, Joker turns to look at the clock, which shows that it’s past midnight and neither ferry has blown the other up]
Batman: What were you hoping to prove? That, deep down, everyone’s as ugly as you? You’re alone!
The Joker: [sighs] Can’t rely on anyone these days, you got to do to everything yourself. Don’t we!
The Joker: It’s a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, do you know how I got these scars?
Batman: No! But I know how you got these!
[Batman shoot his gauntlets into Jokers face]
The Joker: Oh, you. You just couldn’t let me go, could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You truly are incorruptible, aren’t you? Huh? You won’t kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. And I won’t kill you because you’re just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever.
Batman: You’ll be in a padded cell forever.
The Joker: Maybe we could share one.
Batman: This city just showed you that it’s full of people ready to believe in good.
The Joker: Until their spirit breaks completely. Until they get a good look at the real Harvey Dent and all the heroic things he’s done. You didn’t think I’d risk losing the battle for Gotham’s soul in a fistfight with you? No. You need an ace in the hole. Mine’s Harvey.
Batman: What did you do?
The Joker: I took Gotham’s white knight and I brought him down to our level. It wasn’t hard. You see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes is a little push.
[Joker laughs hysterically as Batman races off and the SWATS come to take the Joker into custody]
[at the burnt warehouse where Rachel was captured and killed]
Batman: You don’t want to hurt the boy, Harvey.
Two-Face: It’s not about what I want, it’s about what’s fair! You thought we could be decent men, in an indecent time! Well you were wrong. The world is cruel, and the only morality in a cruel world is chance…
[holds up his coin]
Two-Face: …Unbiased, unprejudiced, fair. His son’s got the same chance she had, 50-50.
Batman: What happened to Rachel wasn’t chance, we decided to act. We three.
Two-Face: Then why was it me who is the only one who lost everything?
Batman: It wasn’t…
Two-Face: The Joker chose me!
Batman: Because you were the best of us! He wanted to prove that even someone as good as you could fall.
Two-Face: [bitterly] And he was right.
Batman: You’re the one pointing the gun, Harvey. So point it at the people responsible.
Two-Face: Fair enough
[holds up his coin]
Two-Face: You first.
[flips the coin then shoots Batman and points the gun at himself]
Two-Face: My turn.
Batman: But The Joker cannot win.
[Batman crouches by Two-Face’s dead body]
Batman: Gotham needs it’s true hero.
[he gently turns Two-Face’s head to show the unscarred side which is Harvey]
Lt. James Gordon: No!
Batman: You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain. I can do those things because I’m not a hero, not like Dent. I killed those people. That’s what I can be
Lt. James Gordon: No, you can’t! You’re not!
Batman: I’m whatever Gotham needs me to be.
Lt. James Gordon: [voice over] They’ll hunt you.
Batman: [voice over] You’ll hunt me. You’ll condemn me. Set the dogs on me. Because that’s what needs to happen. Because sometimes the truth isn’t good enough.
[cuts to show Alfred burns the envelope from Rachel]
Batman: [voice over] Sometimes, people deserve more.
[cuts to show Lucius Fox types his name into the sonar machine]
Batman: [voice over] Sometimes people deserve to have their faith rewarded.
[last lines; calling to Batman hurrying off into the shadows]
James Gordon Jr.: Batman? Batman? Why’s he running, Dad?
Lt. James Gordon: Because we have to chase him.
James Gordon Jr.: He didn’t do anything wrong.
Lt. James Gordon: Because he’s the hero Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So we’ll hunt him because he can take it. Because he’s not our hero. He’s a silent guardian, a watchful protector, a dark knight.
Total Quotes: 88