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[referring to Django]
Calvin Candie: Doc, I am a seasoned slaver. You are, well, you are a neophyte. I’m simply tryin’ to ascertain if this cowboy here is takin’ advantage of you.
Dr. King Schultz: With all due respect, Monsieur Candie, I didn’t seek you out for your advice. I sought you out to purchase a fighting nigger at above top-dollar market price. Now I was under the impression, when you granted me an audience, it would be to discuss business.
Calvin Candie: Well, we weren’t talkin’ business yet. We were discussin’ my curiosity.
[the bartender, Roscoe, gives Schultz his drink]
Calvin Candie: Roscoe, Coco, go outside and play. Sheba, you stay right there.
Sheba: I know you didn’t mean me.
[Schultz raises his glass of beer]
Dr. King Schultz: Prost!
[Candie raises his drink]
Calvin Candie: German.
Calvin Candie: Now, according to Moguy, if I do business with you, I’m doing business with both y’all. He does the eyeballin’, you the billfold? Is that it?
Dr. King Schultz: Well, you don’t make it sound too flattering, but more or less, yeah.
[Candie turns to Django]
Calvin Candie: Hm. So, Bright Boy, Moguy tells me you looked over my African flesh and you was none too impressed, huh?
Django: Not for top dollar.
[Candie walks over to Django]
Calvin Candie: Well, then, we got nothin’ more to talk about. You see, you wanna buy a beat-ass nigger from me, those are the beat-ass niggers I wanna sell, so.
Django: He don’t wanna buy the niggers you wanna sell. He wants the nigger you don’t wanna sell.
Calvin Candie: Well, I don’t sell the niggers I don’t wanna sell.
Dr. King Schultz: Well, you won’t sell your best. You won’t even sell your second best. But your third best, you don’t want to sell him either? But if I made you an offer so ridiculous you’d be forced to consider it, who knows what could happen?
Calvin Candie: And what do you consider ridiculous?
Dr. King Schultz: For a truly talented specimen, the right nigger?
[looking at Django]
Dr. King Schultz: How much would you say, Django?
Django: Twelve thousand dollars.
Calvin Candie: Gentlemen, you had my curiosity, but now you have my attention.
[the next day a whole procession make their way to Candyland, including Candie in his carriage with Schultz and Django riding on their horses behind them, Schultz and Django ride up towards Candie’s carriage]
Calvin Candie: Willie. Willie. Hold up! Hold up.
Dr. King Schultz: Ah! Good morning, gentlemen.
Calvin Candie: Good Dr. Schultz. Beautiful morning, isn’t it?
Dr. King Schultz: You couldn’t have picked a better one.
Calvin Candie: Please, won’t you take a ride with us here in the Victoria.
Dr. King Schultz: Oh, thank you very much.
Calvin Candie: You can tie your horse up back there.
[Schultz gets off his horse and goes to tie him up, Candie looks over at Django who’s feeding some grass to his horse]
Calvin Candie: Django.
[Django tips his hat to acknowledge Candie; the scene then cuts to the previous evening, when they were all having dinner at The Cleopatra Club]
Calvin Candie: Where I part company from many of my phrenologist colleagues is I believe there is a level above bright, above talented, above loyal that a nigger can aspire to. Say, one nigger that just pops up in ten thousand, the exceptional nigger.
[back to the procession to Candyland, Candie looks over to Django as Schultz is busy tying his horse up]
Calvin Candie: Bright day, huh, Bright Boy?
Django: Sun is up.
Calvin Candie: Shinin’ on all of us.
Calvin Candie: Have a seat, doc.
[Schultz takes a seat on Candie’s carriage]
Dr. King Schultz: Thank you. Quite an honor.
Calvin Candie: The honor is all ours.
Dr. King Schultz: Thank you.
[cut back to the previous evening as they continue having dinner at The Cleopatra Club]
Calvin Candie: But I do believe that given time, exceptional niggers, like Bright Boy here, become if not frequent, more frequent.
[looking at Django]
Calvin Candie: Bright Boy, you are that one in ten thousand.
[scene goes to the next day, to the procession to Candyland, one of the overseers approaches Django]
Hoot Peters: The name of the game is keep up, not catch up, nigger.
[the other overseers laugh, Django walks up slowly towards Hoot, who’s sat on his horse, suddenly Django gets a hold of Hoot’s leg and pulls him down along with his horse, and they fall flat onto the ground, the other overseers point their guns at Django and Django immediately draws his gun on them]
Django: Touch your guns, you die.
Calvin Candie: Everybody, calm down! Now I saw the whole thing. No harm done.
Billy Crash: Are you…are you kidding me? This nigger just…
Calvin Candie: I said no harm done! Now take your hand off your pistol! Butch, that means you too. Everybody stop antagonizing my guest. Hoot! Get back up on your horse.
[Hoot is still lying on the ground]
Hoot Peters: He broke my collarbone!
Calvin Candie: For God’s sake, somebody please help Hoot here back up on his goddamn horse.
Billy Crash: Oh, now you are one lucky nigger.
Django: You better listen to your boss, white boy.
Billy Crash: Oh, I’m gonna go walkin’ in the moonlight with you.
Django: You wanna hold my hand?
[Billy laughs and starts riding away]
Calvin Candie: Willie, take us home.
[the procession starts making their way towards Candyland again]
[as they continue to make their way to Candyland, Django feels one of Candie’s slaves looking at him as he rides his horse]
Django: You got a problem with your eyeball, boy?
Rodney: No, sir.
Django: You want a boot heel in it?
Rodney: No, sir.
Django: Then you keep your goddamn eyeballs off me. You flash that bad look at me again, I’ll give you a reason not to like me. Now move, nigger!
[Django rides his horse down the line of slaves]
Django: You niggers are gonna understand something about me, I’m worse than any of these white men here. You get the molasses out your ass, you keep your goddamn eyeballs off me.
[Candie watches Django from his carriage]
Calvin Candie: He is a rambunctious sort, ain’t he?
Dr. King Schultz: Indeed.
[there’s a moment’s pause as Candie turns to looks over at Django again]
Dr. King Schultz: May we stop for a moment so I may put a word in my man’s ear? You know, I’m expecting to fall in love once I see the specimens at Candyland, so before that moment, it would be good if I could have a confidential strategy meeting with my confidant.
[after Candie grants Schultz a moment to talk quietly to Django]
Django: You mind telling me what the hell you doin’?
Dr. King Schultz: I confirmed that Broomhilda’s at Candyland.
Django: You’re sure it’s her?
Dr. King Schultz: He didn’t call her by name, but she’s a young lady, whip marks on her back and speaks German. Now, while it’s not wise to assume, in this instance, I think it’s pretty safe. Point being, don’t get so carried away with your retribution, you lose sight of why we’re here.
Django: You think I lost sight of that?
Dr. King Schultz: Yes, I do. Stop antagonizing Candie. You’re going to blow this whole charade, or more than likely get us both killed. And I, for one, don’t intend to die in Chickasaw County, Mississippi, USA.
Django: I’m not antagonizing him, I’m intriguing him.
Dr. King Schultz: You’re yelling abuse at these poor slaves.
Django: I recall the man who had me kill another man in front of his son and he didn’t bat an eye. You remember that?
Dr. King Schultz: Yeah, of course I remember.
Django: What you said was that this is my world, and in my world you gotta get dirty. So that’s what I’m doin’, I’m gettin’ dirty.
[Schultz stares at Django for a moment]
Dr. King Schultz: Well, you’re paraphrasing a tad, but that was the general gist. See you at Candyland.
[Schultz turns and walks off towards Candie’s carriage, Django gets back on his horse and rides back up the line of slaves]
Django: Alright, niggers, back at it.
[to Billy as Django passes by him]
Django: That means you too, Moonlight.
[Candie’s carriage and entourage stop near the Candyland Plantation as they see a runaway slave that has been chased up a tree by four dogs, who are all barking at the slave]
Calvin Candie: I’ll be. D’Artagnan! Now, boy, why do a fool thing like run off?
D’Artagnan: I can’t fight no more, Monsieur Candie.
Calvin Candie: Yes, you can. You might not be able to win, but your ass can fight.
getting frustrated by the dogs, Candie rises from his carriage
Mr. Stonesipher, would you please shut these goddamn dogs up? I cannot hear myself think!
[to the dog]
Mr. Stonesipher: Quiet down, Marsha! Marsha, hush up! Marsha! Hush up!
[to the other trackers]
Mr. Stonesipher: Hey! Get these goddamn dogs away from this nigger!
[one of the trackers takes the dogs to one side away from D’Artagnan]
Calvin Candie: Come on now, boy. Get on out that tree.
D’Artagnan: Yes, sir.
[D’Artagnan comes down from the tree, Candie steps out of his carriage and walks towards Stonesipher]
Calvin Candie: How long was he loose?
Mr. Stonesipher: A night. Day. Half the other night.
Calvin Candie: How far he get off the property?
Mr. Stonesipher: ‘Bout 20 miles off the prop. Pretty far considering that limp he got.
Calvin Candie: Hm. Mr. Moguy, who was uh…D’Artagnan supposed to fight on Friday?
Leonide Moguy: One of this new lot.
Calvin Candie: Well, way he looks now, a blind Indian wouldn’t bet a bead on him.
[D’Artagnan start crying]
D’Artagnan: Please, Monsieur Candie, I ain’t got it in me no more. I can’t…
Calvin Candie: Now, now, now, now, now. Now, no beggin’. No playin’ on my soft heart.
[Candie walks closer to D’Artagnan and crouches down in front of him]
Calvin Candie: You in trouble now, son.
D’Artagnan: Yes, sir.
Calvin Candie: I done…I done paid five hundred dollars for you. When I pay five hundred dollars, then I expect to get five fights out of a nigger before he roll over and play dead.
D’Artagnan: Yes, sir.
Calvin Candie: You gotta understand that I’m…I’m runnin’ a business here. You…you fought three fights.
D’Artagnan: But I won every one.
Calvin Candie: Yes, you did. Yes, you did. But that last one, you muddled the line between winnin’ and losin’.
D’Artagnan: Yes, sir.
Calvin Candie: Still, the fact remains, I paid five hundred dollars, I want five goddamn fights! So what about my five hundred dollars, huh? What about my five hundred dollars? You gonna reimburse me? You even know what reimburse means? Huh?
[Candie’s white crew start laughing except for Schultz]
Dr. King Schultz: I’ll reimburse you!
[Candie suddenly turns to look over at Schultz who takes out his wallet]
Calvin Candie: You will?
Dr. King Schultz: Yep.
Calvin Candie: You’ll pay five hundred dollars for practically a one eyed Ole’ Joe, ain’t fit to push a broom?
Django: No, he won’t. He just tired of you toyin’ with him is all. As a matter of fact, so am I. But we ain’t payin’ a penny for that pickaninny, ain’t got no use for him. Ain’t that right, doc?
Dr. King Schultz: You heard him.
[Schultz puts his wallet back in his jacket pocket and sits back down in Candie’s carriage]
Calvin Candie: You’re gonna have to excuse Mr. Stonesipher’s slack jawed gaze. He…he ain’t never seen a nigger like you ever in his life. Ain’t that right, Mr. Stonesipher?
[Stonesipher spits before answering]
Mr. Stonesipher: That right.
Calvin Candie: For that matter, nor have I.
[Candie steps up to Django on his horse and looks up at him]
Calvin Candie: Now, seein’ as you won’t pay a penny for this pickaninny here, you won’t mind me handlin’ this nigger any way I see fit?
Django: He’s your nigger.
[without taking his eyes away from Django]
Calvin Candie: Mr. Stonesipher, let Marsha and her bitches send D’Artagnan to nigger heaven.
[Stonesipher and the other trackers release the dogs which then attack D’Artagnan, as D’Artagnan cries out in pain from being torn apart by the dogs, the other slaves react and look away, during attack Candie continues to stare at Django and Django returns his stony stare, never reacting; Candie then looks over at Schultz, who looks away as the attack is taking place]
Calvin Candie: Your boss looks a little green around the gills for a blood sport like nigger fighting.
Django: Nah, he just ain’t used to seein’ a man ripped apart by dogs is all.
Calvin Candie: Hm. You are used to it?
Django: I’m just a little more used to Americans than he is.
Calvin Candie: Hm.
Django: Now, Monsieur Candie, whenever you’re ready. We rode five hours so you could show off your stock. Let’s get to it. Cause as of now, if he’s an example, I ain’t impressed.
Calvin Candie: Follow me.
[Candie turns and walks towards his carriage, Django looks at D’Artagnan as his torn body gets dragged away by the dogs]
[after Candie’s procession finally arrive at Candyland, his loyal house-slave Stephen notices Django riding up with Schultz and we immediately see his dislike and disapproval of Django in his eyes, Candie turns and notices Stephen on the front porch of the house]
Calvin Candie: Hello! Stephen, my boy!
Stephen: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hello, my ass.
[referring to Django]
Stephen: Who this nigger up on that nag?
[Stephen walks down the stairs towards Candie’s carriage]
Calvin Candie: Oh, Stephen, you have nails for breakfast? What’s the matter? Why you so ornery? You miss me, huh?
Stephen: Oh, yes, sir. I…I miss you like a…like a hog miss slop! Like a..like a baby miss mammy’s titty. I miss you like I misses a rock in my shoe.
[Stephen and Candie laugh]
Stephen: Now, I axed you, who this nigger on that nag?
Django: Hey, Snowball.
[Stephen turns and looks at Django sat on his horse]
Django: Wanna know my name or the name of my horse, you ask me.
Stephen: Just who the hell you callin’ Snowball, horse boy? I’ll snatch your black ass off that nag there and in the mud so fast…
Calvin Candie: Woh, woh, woh! Stephen, Stephen, Stephen. Let’s keep it funny. Django here’s a Freeman.
[pointing to Django]
Stephen: This nigger here?
Calvin Candie: That nigger there. Let me at least introduce the two of you. Django, this is another cheeky black bugger like yourself, Stephen. Stephen, this here’s Django. You two oughta hate each other.
Stephen: Calvin, just who the hell is this nigger you feels the need to entertain?
Calvin Candie: Django and his friend in gray here, Dr. Schultz, are customers. And they are our guests, Stephen. And you, you old decrepit bastard, oughta show them every hospitality. You understand that?
Stephen: Yes, sir. Him I understand. But I don’t know why I got to take lip off this nigger.
Calvin Candie: You don’t have to know why. Do you understand?
Stephen: Yes, sir. I understand.
Calvin Candie: Well, good. They’re spendin’ the night. Go up in the guest bedrooms and get two ready.
[pointing to Django]
Stephen: He gonna stay in The Big House?
Calvin Candie: Stephen, he’s a slaver. It’s different.
Stephen: In The Big House?!
Calvin Candie: Well, you got a problem with that?
Stephen: Oh, no. I ain’t got no problem with it, if you ain’t got no problem with burnin’ the bed, the sheets, the pillowcases, everything else when this black ass motherfucker’s gone!
Calvin Candie: That is my problem, they are mine to burn! Now your problem right now
is makin’ a good impression! And I want you to start solvin’ that problem right now and get them goddamn rooms ready!
Stephen: Yes, sir, Monsieur Candie.
Calvin Candie: Go on, now.
[Stephen starts walking off towards the house and mutters]
Stephen: Can’t believe you brought a nigger to stay in The Big House. Your daddy rollin’ over in his goddamned grave.
Calvin Candie: Man, the lip on him. Wooh! He’s gettin’ worse and worse.
[after Stephen walks off, Candie stands up in his carriage and yells out]
Calvin Candie: Now, where is my beautiful sister?!
[Candie sister walks out on to the front porch of the house]
Calvin Candie: There she is! Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
[Candie jumps down from his carriage and goes over to his sister]
Calvin Candie: Dr. Schultz, this attractive Southern belle is my widowed sister. Darlin’, you are a tonic for tired eyes.
[he kisses her cheeks, Schultz and Candie ride over closer to the house]
Calvin Candie: May I present to you Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly.
[Lara Lee does a curtsy; one of the overseers rides over to the slaves lined up outside the house]
Overseer #1: Chester, Rodney, Chicken Charly. Y’all get your ass over by that pen.
Overseer #2: Come on, Charly. Come on, now!
Overseer #1: Let’s go.
[the slaves start running off towards the pen]
Overseer #1: You know where it is. Like you on a rope! Niggers don’t walk around here, niggers run!
[Schultz walks over to Candie]
Dr. King Schultz: Ah, Monsieur Candie?
Calvin Candie: Hm?
Dr. King Schultz: Yeah, about that matter about the nigger girl you were talking about?
Calvin Candie: Nigger gal?
Dr. King Schultz: Yeah, I believe you mentioned she spoke German.
Calvin Candie: Ah, yes! Hildi, what about her?
Dr. King Schultz: Do you think before the demonstration, you could send her around to my room?
Calvin Candie: You little dickens, you. I don’t see why not.
[turning to Stephen]
Calvin Candie: Stephen, when you get through showin’ them to their rooms, go fetch Hildi, get her cleaned up and smellin’ real nice and sent over to Dr. Schultz’s room here.
Stephen: Actually, Monsieur Candie, sir, there’s a somethin’ I ain’t…I ain’t told you about yet.
Calvin Candie: What?
Stephen: Uh…Hildi in The Hot Box.
[he points over to a large iron box on the grounds a little in the distance, this make Django look over at the box with concern]
Calvin Candie: What’s she doin’ there?
Stephen: What you think she doin’ there…in The Hot Box? She bein’ punished.
Calvin Candie: What she do?
Stephen: She run off again.
Calvin Candie: Jesus Christ, Stephen, how many people ran away while I was gone?
Calvin Candie: When did she go?
Stephen: Last night. They…they brung her back this morning.
Calvin Candie: How bad did Stonesipher’s dogs tear her up?
[on hearing this, Django puts his hand on his gun, ready to draw]
Stephen: Lucky for her, they was out chasin’ D’Artagnan’s ass. Now, Bill and Cody went lookin’ for her, found her, brung her back. Now, she a little beat-up, but she done that to her own damn self runnin’ through them damn bushes and shit.
Calvin Candie: How long has she been in the box?
Stephen: How long you think she been in there? All damn day! And the little bitch got ten more days to be in there.
[on hearing that Broomhilda is still alive, Django takes his hand off his gun]
Calvin Candie: Still, take her out.
Stephen: Take her out? Why?!
Calvin Candie: Because I said so, that’s why. Dr. Schultz is my guest. Hildi is my nigger. Southern hospitality dictates I make her available to him.
Stephen: But, Monsieur Candie, she run off.
Calvin Candie: Jesus Christ, Stephen. What is the point of havin’ a nigger that speaks German if you can’t wheel ’em out when you have a German guest? Now, I realize it is inconvenient, but still, you take her ass out.
Stephen: Yes, sir.
[Candie turns to his sister]
Calvin Candie: Lara Lee, will you and Cora be responsible for gettin’ Hildi cleaned up and presentable for Dr. Schultz here?
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Of course, darlin’.
[turning to Schultz and Django]
Calvin Candie: Now, gentlemen, I do apologize, but I am weary from our travels beyond words. It is time for me to rest my tired eyes.
[Candie kisses his sister’s cheek before walking into the house]
[after Candie goes into the house, Stephen yells over to the overseers]
Stephen: Y’all done heard the man! Get her ass up outta there!
[turning to the house slave]
Stephen: Cora! Come here! Get over there and get her cleaned up, bring her back over here to Dr…
Stephen: What he say your name is, Shoots?
Dr. King Schultz: Schultz.
Stephen: Schultz. Get her back over here. Hurry up, girl.
Cora: Yes, sir.
[as Cora runs over to the iron box, Django watches as the overseers open up the iron coffin like box, throw water on Broomhilda, who’s naked, and as the water hits her she screams out and cries, the overseers drag her out of the box and take her away to be cleaned up, Django continues to watch when Stephen calls out to him]
Stephen: Is you comin’ with me or is you gonna sleep in that little box over yonder?
[Django turns and gives Stephen a cold look]
[later that evening, a cleaned up Broomhilda is brought to Schultz by Lara Lee and Cora, Lara Lee knocks on Schultz’s door and he opens the door]
Dr. King Schultz: Hello, ladies.
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Dr. Schultz, may I introduce to you Broomhilda?
[Schultz looks at Broomhilda and she curtsy’s]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Hildi, this is Dr. Schultz.
Dr. King Schultz: It’s a pleasure to meet you, Broomhilda. I’ve heard a lot of good things about you.
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Well, it’s not every nigger speaks German, don’t ya know.
Dr. King Schultz: As I look at you now, Broomhilda, I can see all the passions you inspire are completely justified.
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: The doctor here speaks German.
Dr. King Schultz: And I’ve been informed you do as well?
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Go ahead, girl. Speak a little German.
[Broomhilda addresses Schultz in German]
Broomhilda Von Shaft: [subtitled] It would be my pleasure to speak with you in German.
Dr. King Schultz: Astonishing.
[Schultz speaks to Broomhilda in German]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Please come inside, Fraulein.
[Broomhilda enters Schultz’s room]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: And I shall bring you…
Dr. King Schultz: Much obliged.
[Schultz closes the door in her face]
[inside the room with the door closed, Schultz speaks in German to Broomhilda]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Can I pour you a glass of water?
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Ja.
[Schultz walks over to the other side and pours her a glass of water, he holds out the glass to her and as she comes over to take it, he holds onto the glass for a moment]
Dr. King Schultz: Don’t be afraid.
[he lets go of the glass]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Excuse me.
[Schultz walks over to his bed and starts making it up]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] I’m aware you haven’t spoken German in a long while. So I’ll talk slowly.
[we see Django on the other side of the adjoining door, listening]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] I’m only speaking German to you now in case Candie’s people are listening to us.
[Schultz puts on his jacket]
Dr. King Schultz: Hm. Pardon.
[there’s a moment’s pause as he looks at Broomhilda]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] How beautiful you are.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Danke.
[Schultz sits in front of her]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Myself and a mutual friend of ours have gone through a lot of trouble, and rode a lot of miles, to find you, Fraulein…to rescue you.
[Broomhilda looks at him with confusion]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Please drink.
[Broomhilda drinks from her glass of water]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Now, it’s myself and our mutual friend’s intention to take you away from here forever.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: [subtitled] I don’t got any friends.
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Yes, you do.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: [subtitled] Who?
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] I can’t tell you. Our mutual friend has a flair for the dramatic.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: [subtitled] Where is this friend?
[Schultz points to the adjoining door behind her]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Standing right behind that door.
[Broomhilda turns and looks at the door]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Promise me you won’t scream?
[Broomhilda nods her head as she turns back to look at Schultz]
Dr. King Schultz: [subtitled] Say, “I promise.”
Broomhilda Von Shaft: [subtitled] I promise.
[Schultz raps on the bedpost to give his signal, and the adjoining door slowly opens, Broomhilda sees Django standing there]
Django: Hey, Little Trouble Maker.
[shocked, Broomhilda drops her glass of water then she falls on the floor in a dead faint, Schultz and Django look at each other]
Dr. King Schultz: You silver-tongued devil, you.
[in the kitchen, Stephen walks past Cora as she is instructing the other house slaves on what to serve at dinner]
Stephen: Get your big pretty ass out the way.
Cora: You know you like it.
Stephen: That’s ’cause you knows what I like.
Cora: Ooh! Come on with these biscuits, girl.
[Stephen walks into the dining room and stands next to Candie, Django and the other white people including Schultz are sat around the dining table, the house slaves, including Broomhilda are serving them]
Dr. King Schultz: Look, Monsieur Candie, they were all fine specimens, no doubt about it. But the best three by far were Samson…
[turns to Django, who’s sat next to him]
Dr. King Schultz: What’s that other one’s name?
[turning back to Candie]
Dr. King Schultz: Goldie, and Eskimo Joe. By the way, why is he called Eskimo Joe?
Calvin Candie: You never know how these nigger nicknames get started. His name was Joe, maybe one day he said he was cold. Who knows?
[Candie’s sister and Schultz laugh]
Dr. King Schultz: Well, regardless, Samson’s your best. We all know that. You will never sell him, and I can see why, he’s a champion.
Calvin Candie: Hm-hm. All three are champions.
Django: Samson’s the champion. Them other two pretty good.
[the other house slaves in the room look shocked at the way Django just spoke to Candie]
Stephen: Calvin, now what’s this nigger you let…
Calvin Candie: It’s alright. It’s alright.
Dr. King Schultz: You have to understand, Monsieur Candie, while admittedly a neophyte in the nigger fight game, I do have a little bit of a background in the European traveling circus.
Calvin Candie: Is that right?
Dr. King Schultz: Hence, I have big ideas when it comes to presentation.
Calvin Candie: Hm.
Dr. King Schultz: I need something more than just a big nigger. Yeah, he needs to have panache.
Stephen: Need to have what? What?
Calvin Candie: Panache. Uh…
[Candie points to Schultz to explain]
Dr. King Schultz: A sense of showmanship.
Calvin Candie: Showmanship, yes.
Dr. King Schultz: I want to be able to bill him as The Black Hercules.
Calvin Candie: The Black Hercules, isn’t that clever?
Stephen: More like Niggerles.
Dr. King Schultz: I said, and I quote, “I would pay top dollar for the right nigger.” Now I’m not saying that Eskimo Joe is the wrong nigger, per se. But is he right as rain?
Calvin Candie: Oh, Dr. Schultz, I will have you know there is no one in the nigger fight game that appreciates the value of showmanship more than Monsieur Calvin J. Candie here.
Calvin Candie: But one must not forget the most important thing in the nigger fight game.
Calvin Candie: And that is a nigger that can win fights.
Calvin Candie: Now that should be your first, second, third, fourth, and fifth concern. Now, after you have that, and you know you have that, then you can start to implement a grand design. In other words, first thing is first.
Stephen: First thing’s first.
[Schultz turns to Broomhilda and snaps his fingers at her, she comes forward and pours him some more wine, as she pours he speaks to her quietly in German and she smiles]
Calvin Candie: Ooh! I see you two gettin’ on.
Dr. King Schultz: Famously. Oh, Monsieur Candie, you can’t imagine what it’s like not to hear your native tongue in four years.
Calvin Candie: Well, hell, I can’t imagine two weeks in Boston.
[this makes Stephen laugh hard while everyone else at the table chuckles]
Stephen: Two weeks in Boston! Monsieur Candie, you a mess! Two weeks in Boston!
Dr. King Schultz: I can’t express the joy I felt conversing in my mother tongue. And Hildi is a charming conversation companion.
[Schultz touches Broomhilda’s arm and she smiles shyly]
Calvin Candie: Well, be careful now, Dr. Schultz. You might have caught yourself a little dose of nigger love.
Calvin Candie: Nigger love’s a powerful emotion, boy.
Calvin Candie: It’s like a pool of black tar. Once it catches your ass, you’re caught.
Stephen: Yes, sir, you stuck.
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: I don’t know, doctor. You can lay on all the German sweet talk you want, but it looks like this pony’s got big eyes for Django.
[Broomhilda looks up in shock and Django quickly looks away]
Dr. King Schultz: Well, naturally. It is the soaring eagle that attracts her attention, not the plucked chicken.
[this makes the others at the table chuckle, Broomhilda leaves the room and as she leaves Stephen watches her with suspicion and then looks at Django]
Calvin Candie: Dr. Schultz, don’t be so down on yourself. You are quite the dapper European gentleman.
[Stephen follows Broomhilda into the kitchen]
Stephen: You know that nigger, don’t you?
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Who?
Stephen: Who? Don’t ‘who’ me, bitch. You know who I’m talkin’ about.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: At the table? I don’t know him.
Stephen: You don’t know him?
Broomhilda Von Shaft: No.
Stephen: No, what?
Broomhilda Von Shaft: No, sir.
[Stephen does an evil quite laugh]
Stephen: You wouldn’t lie to me, now, would you?
[Broomhilda shakes her head]
Stephen: Okay. If…if you say so.
[Stephen looks at her with suspicion and leaves the kitchen to go back into the dining room]
[back to the dinner table, the conversation about the Mandingo fighters continues]
Django: Eskimo Joe’s a quality nigger, no doubt about it. But if it was my money, I wouldn’t pay no twelve thousand dollars for him.
Dr. King Schultz: What would your price be?
Django: Well, if I was inclined to be generous, and I don’t know why I would be inclined to be generous, nine thousand…maybe.
Calvin Candie: Dr. Schultz, let me reclarify how this whole negotiation came about. You see, it wasn’t me who came to you to sell a nigger.
Stephen: Sure wasn’t.
Calvin Candie: It was you who approached me to buy one.
Stephen: Sure was.
Calvin Candie: Now, that nine thousand figure Bright Boy’s been bandyin’ about, that ain’t too far off from right. And if I wanted to sell Eskimo Joe for that, I could do so any day of the week.
Stephen: Any day.
Calvin Candie: But, like you said in Greenville, doctor, I don’t want to sell him. It was only your ridiculous offer of twelve thousand that made me even consider it.
[Schultz considers Candie’s words for a moment before replying]
Dr. King Schultz: You know, Monsieur Candie, you do possess the power of persuasion.
[this makes Candie smile and then Schultz suddenly slaps the table]
Dr. King Schultz: Why not! Monsieur Candie, you have a deal. Eskimo Joe, twelve thousand dollars.
[Candie slaps the table]
Calvin Candie: Hooray, doctor. Hooray. And a wise decision that is.
Dr. King Schultz: However, that is a tremendous amount of money. And the way you have your Mr. Moguy, I have a lawyer. Persnickety man named Tuttle, and I would need my Mr. Tuttle to draw up a legal contract before I’d feel comfortable exchanging that amount of money for flesh.
Calvin Candie: Mm-hmm.
Dr. King Schultz: Not to mention having Eskimo Joe examined by a physician of my choosing.
Calvin Candie: Naturally.
Dr. King Schultz: So, say I return in about…
[he looks over at Django and Django raises five fingers]
Dr. King Schultz: …five days time.
Calvin Candie: Five days?
Dr. King Schultz: With my Mr. Tuttle. And then my Mr. Tuttle and your Mr. Moguy can hash out the finer details between themselves.
Calvin Candie: I say splendid, doctor. Splendid.
Calvin Candie: Gentlemen, may I propose a toast.
[Candie raises his glass and the others do the same]
Calvin Candie: To Eskimo Joe! Or shall we call him The Black Hercules?
[the others around the table laugh]
Dr. King Schultz: To The Black Hercules.
Stephen: The Black Hercules.
[Schultz turns to touch his glass to Django’s and says quietly]
Dr. King Schultz: To The Black Hercules.
Stephen: You was right, doctor. That name do have pan-ass.
Calvin Candie: Hm. Hildi, top my drink off.
[Broomhilda steps next to him and pours more wine into his glass]
Calvin Candie: So, Hildi, how you like servin’ at the big table in The Big House, huh?
Stephen: When Monsieur Candie talk to you, you answers.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: I like it a lot, Monsieur Candie.
Calvin Candie: Mm-hmm.
[Schultz and Django look tensely over at them]
Calvin Candie: It’s a lot better than sizzlin’ in that Hot Box, or draggin’ your ass through a bramble bush. But maybe it’s not quite as much fun as gettin’ to pleasure all them Mandingos, huh, sugar bear?
Stephen: Oh, Lord, she like them niggers. Sure do.
Calvin Candie: Like Samson? Huh?
Broomhilda Von Shaft: No, sir.
Stephen: You know, Monsieur Candie, the doctor here might be interested in seein’ Hildi’s peeled back, seein’ as how they don’t have many niggers where he come from.
Calvin Candie: Dr. Schultz, when you was alone with Hildi, here, did you…did you just speak German or did you get to take her clothes off?
[Stephen looks to see how Django reacts, Django just watches Broomhilda with tension]
Dr. King Schultz: No, we just talked and…
Calvin Candie: Oh, so you haven’t seen her back?
Dr. King Schultz: I haven’t…
Calvin Candie: No, no, no, no. Stephen’s right, you might find this interesting. Hildi, go on, take off your dress. Show Dr. Schultz your back here. Go on.
[Stephen starts to undoing Broomhilda’s dress at the back, Broomhilda looks over at Django with tears in her eyes]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Uh…Calvin. I just got her all dressed up and lookin’ nice.
Calvin Candie: But, Lara Lee, Dr. Schultz is from Dusseldorf. They don’t got niggers there. He is a man of medicine.
[as Django watches this, he slowly takes his hand down to his gun, getting ready to draw]
Calvin Candie: I’m sure it would fascinate him, the niggers’ endurance for pain. These niggers are tough, Dr. Schultz, no doubt about it.
[Stephen pushes Broomhilda’s dress back and turns her around, showing her exposed back]
Calvin Candie: Hildi’s got somethin’ like four lashes on her back. Lara Lee just get one, she’d lose her goddamn mind.
Stephen: Sure would.
[Candie points to the whip marks on Broomhilda’s back]
Calvin Candie: Look at that, doctor. It’s like a paintin’. Look at that.
[suddenly Lara Lee snaps and slaps the table]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Calvin! We are eating. Ain’t no one wanna look at her whipped up back.
Calvin Candie: Fine. Fine, fine, fine, fine. After dinner, then, Stephen. After dinner. During the brandies, gentlemen, hm?
[Django nods his head and puts his gun back into his holster and takes his hand off the gun]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Cora, come get this girl!
[Stephen watches how Django has been reacting and smiles to himself, Cora walks into the room]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: She a mess.
Cora: Yes, ma’am.
[Cora sees how Broomhilda’s dress has been undone at the back]
Cora: Oh! Why are you all undone? I just got you done up. Come on in here.
[Cora takes Broomhilda out of the dining room, Stephen takes one more look at Django, and follows Broomhilda and Cora into the Kitchen]
[in the kitchen, Cora helps Broomhilda with doing up the back of her dress]
Cora: Baby, you on Stephen bad side, and you need to be on his blind side.
[Stephen sneaks up behind Cora and Broomhilda]
Stephen: You say you ain’t know him.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Huh?
Stephen: I said, you said you ain’t know him.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: I don’t.
Stephen: Yes, you do.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Mr. Stephen, I don’t.
Stephen: Why is you lyin’ to me?
[tears start welling up in Broomhilda’s eyes]
Broomhilda Von Shaft: I ain’t.
Stephen: Then why is you cryin’?
Broomhilda Von Shaft: You scarin’ me.
Stephen: Why is I’m scaring you?
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Because you’re scary.
[the whole kitchen goes quiet as Stephen watches Broomhilda, then the silence is broken as they hear Schultz speaking to Candie in the dining room]
Dr. King Schultz: To speak German this afternoon with Hildi was positively soul-enriching.
Calvin Candie: Doctor, that warms my heart to hear that.
[suddenly Stephen grabs hold of Broomhilda’s arm and pushes her down into the nearby chair]
Stephen: You stay right here.
[Stephen moves to the kitchen door, swings it open, and watches Schultz]
Dr. King Schultz: You indicated earlier you’d be willing to part with Hildi.
Calvin Candie: Why, yes. Yes, siree bob, I did.
Dr. King Schultz: In that case, allow me to propose another proposition.
Calvin Candie: I’m all ears.
[suddenly Stephen interrupts by barging into the dining room and shouting behind him]
Calvin Candie: Hurry up, goddamn it!
Stephen: Monsieur Candie…
Calvin Candie: Stephen! You just interrupted Dr. Schultz here.
Stephen: I’m sorry, Dr. Schultz. My ears ain’t worth a damn these days.
Calvin Candie: Excuse him.
Stephen: Monsieur Candie, could I get a word with you in the kitchen?
Calvin Candie: You mean get up out of my chair?
Stephen: If you could manage it.
Calvin Candie: Why?
Stephen: It’s about dessert.
Calvin Candie: What about dessert?
Stephen: I’d rather discuss that in private.
Calvin Candie: We’re having white cake! What sort of melodrama could be brewing back there?
Stephen: You right, Monsieur Candie. You right, I’ll handle it myself.
[as Stephen turns to go he whispers to Candie]
Stephen: Meet me in the library.
[then more loudly so the others can hear]
Stephen: I just can’t understand why you won’t come talk to these niggers. Shit get fucked up around here, you blame me.
Calvin Candie: Fine! Fine, friend Stephen, I…I will be along momentarily.
Stephen: Yes, sir.
[Stephen leaves the room, then Candie turns to the table]
Calvin Candie: Well, gentlemen, as you can see, talented as they are no doubt in the kitchen, from time to time, adult supervision is required.
[Candie rises from his chair]
Calvin Candie: If you’ll excuse me a moment.
[Candie turns to leave and as he opens the door to the kitchen he addresses the house slaves]
Calvin Candie: You may clear the dinner service.
[the house slaves start clearing the dinner table]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: So, Dr. Schultz, why don’t you regale us with a tale of the circus.
Dr. King Schultz: The circus?
[Candie enters the library where Stephen is sat in a chair drinking brandy]
Calvin Candie: What is the matter?
Stephen: Them motherfuckers ain’t hereto buy no Mandingos. They wants that girl.
Calvin Candie: Stephen, what the hell are you talking about? Hm?
[Candie sits in the chair opposite Stephen’s]
Stephen: They playin’ your ass for a fool, is what I’m talking about. They ain’t here for no musclebound Jimmie, they here for that girl.
Calvin Candie: Wh…what girl? What, Hildi?
Stephen: Yeah, Hildi. Her and Django, them niggers know each other.
Calvin Candie: He…he just bought Eskimo Joe, I…
Stephen: Did he give you any money?
Calvin Candie: No! Not yet. But they…
Stephen: Then he ain’t bought diddly, not yet no how. But he’s just about to buy who he come here to buy when I interrupted him. Thank you, Stephen. You’re welcome, Calvin.
[Calvin thinks for a moment taking all this in]
Calvin Candie: Where…where you gettin’ all this? Why would they go through all that trouble for a nigger with a…with a chewed up back, ain’t worth three hundred dollars?
Stephen: They doin’ it cause that nigger Django’s in love with Hildi. She probably his wife. Now, why that German gives a fuck who that uppity son of a bitch is in love with, I’m sure I don’t know.
Calvin Candie: If she’s who they want, why this whole snake oil pitch about Mandingos then?
Stephen: You wouldn’t pay no never mind to no three hundred dollar. But that twelve thousand? That made you real friendly now, didn’t it?
Calvin Candie: Yes, it did. His Wife, huh?
[he pauses for a moment]
Calvin Candie: If it had been a snake, it would have bit me. Those lyin’ goddamn time-wastin’ sons of bitches.
[suddenly Candie snaps his hand in anger and shouts]
Calvin Candie: Sons of bitches!
[back in the dining room, Lara Lee is talking to Schultz, trying to hold down the fort until Candie returns]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: …out of New Orleans, so I have quite a bit of practice with theater types.
[Candie enters the room]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Oh, there you are. I was beginning to think that you and that old crow run off together.
[Lara Lee, Candie and Moguy laugh]
Calvin Candie: That’d be a hell of a note, wouldn’t it? Lara Lee, I was just lookin’ out the big window. Billy Crash is out there dealing with some shady slaver tryin’ to sell a passel of ponies. Would you be a dear, go out there and give them gals an eyeball? Hm?
[he comes up behind her chair and leans down to kiss her cheek]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Of course, brother.
Calvin Candie: Thank you, darlin’.
[Lara Lee rises, Candie kisses her cheeks and she exits the room]
Dr. King Schultz: Yeah. Business never sleeps.
Calvin Candie: Mm-hmm.
Dr. King Schultz: Apropos, before your exit, we were discussing the possibility of my purchasing Broomhilda.
Calvin Candie: Ah, yes. Yes, we were, doctor. And we will again, in a moment.
[Candie takes out a skull from a box and places it on the dining table]
Dr. King Schultz: Who’s your little friend?
[Candie sits and places his hand on top of the skull]
Calvin Candie: This is Ben. He’s an old Joe that lived around here for a long time. And I do mean a long damn time. Old Ben here took care of my daddy, and my daddy’s daddy. Till he up and keeled over one day, Old Ben took care of me. Growin’ up the son of a…of huge plantation owner in Mississippi puts a white man in contact with a whole lotta black faces. I spent my whole life here, right here in Candyland, surrounded by black faces. Now, seeing them every day, day in, day out, I…I only had one question. Why don’t they kill us?
[Moguy laughs and Candie gives him a cold look]
Calvin Candie: Now, right out there on that porch, three times a week for fifty years, Old Ben here would shave my daddy with a straight razor. Now, if I was Old Ben, I woulda cut my daddy’s goddamn throat and it wouldn’t have taken me no fifty years to do it neither. But he never did. Why not?
Calvin Candie: You see, the science of phrenology is crucial to understanding the separation of our two species.
[Candie rises from his seat and takes out a small saw]
Calvin Candie: In the skull of the African here, the area associated with submissiveness is larger than any human or any other subhuman species on planet Earth.
[Candie starts sawing the back of the skull and breaking off the piece]
Calvin Candie: If you examine this piece of skull here, you will notice three distinct dimples.
[he points to the areas on the piece of skull]
Calvin Candie: Here, here and here. Now, if I was holding the skull of a…of an Isaac Newton or Galileo, these three dimples would be found in the area of the skull most associated with creativity. But this is the skull of Old Ben, and in the skull of Old Ben, unburdened by genius, these three dimples exist in the area of the skull most associated with…servility.
[looking at Django]
Calvin Candie: Now, Bright Boy, I will admit you are pretty clever. But if I took this hammer here…
[points to the hammer placed on the table]
Calvin Candie: …and I bashed in your skull with it, you would have the same three dimples in the same place as Old Ben.
[suddenly the dining room door bursts open and Pooch points his sawed-off shotgun at Schultz and Django, this makes Schultz and Django jump up and turn from their seats, Candie yells at them]
Calvin Candie: Hey! Now lay your palms flat on that tabletop! If you lift those palms off that turtle shell tabletop, Mr. Pooch is gonna let loose with both barrels of that sawed-off.
[Schultz and Django slowly turn and sit back down with their palms on the table]
Calvin Candie: There have been a lot of lies said around this dinner table here tonight, but that you can believe! Mr. Moguy, would you be so kind as to collect the pistol hanging off these boys hips here?
[Moguy rises from his seat and goes over to Schultz get his guns]
Calvin Candie: Thank you ever so much.
Leonide Moguy: Doctor.
Calvin Candie: Where were we?
[Moguy goes over to Django and collects his gun]
Leonide Moguy: Jackass.
Calvin Candie: Ah, yes. I do believe you were just getting ready to make me a proposition to buy Broomhilda. Am I right?
Dr. King Schultz: Right.
Calvin Candie: Bring out Hildi!
[Stephen enters the dining room with Broomhilda through the kitchen, he pushes Broomhilda forward]
Stephen: Get over there yonder.
[Candie pushes Broomhilda into his seat]
Calvin Candie: Sit your ass in that goddamn seat!
[Broomhilda yells in pain]
Stephen: Lay your hand flat on that tabletop.
Calvin Candie: Now shut your mouth!
[Django and Broomhilda look at each other]
Calvin Candie: Dr. Schultz, in Greenville, you yourself said that for the right nigger you’d be willin’ to pay what some may consider is a ridiculous amount. To which me myself said, “What is your definition of ridiculous?” To which you said, “Twelve thousand dollars.”
[he grabs hold of top of Broomhilda’s head making her yell out]
Calvin Candie: Now, considering y’all have ridden a whole lotta miles, went through a whole lotta trouble, and done spread a whole lotta bull to purchase this lovely lady right here, it would appear that Broomhilda is in fact the right nigger. And if y’all want to leave Candyland with Broomhilda, the price is twelve thousand dollars.
Dr. King Schultz: And I take it you prefer the take it or leave it style of negotiation?
Calvin Candie: Yes, I do, doctor. You see, under the laws of Chickasaw County, Broomhilda here is my property. And I can choose to do with my property whatever I so desire! And if y’all think my price for this nigger here is too steep…
[he grabs hold of Broomhilda’s face]
Calvin Candie: …what I’m gonna desire to do is…
[he takes the hammer from the table, then suddenly pushes Broomhilda’s head down on the table and holds the hammer up as if to smash her head with it, Django reacts by jumping out of his chair]
Calvin Candie: …take this goddamn hammer here and beat her ass to death with it! Right in front of both y’all!
[Pooch points his sawed-off shotgun at Django’s back]
Butch Pooch: Easy, big fella.
[Candie continues to hold Broomhilda’s head down and holding the hammer up with his other hand and yells out]
Calvin Candie: Then we can examine the three dimples inside Broomhilda’s skull! Now, what’s it gonna be, doc?! Huh?! What’s it gonna be?!
[Schultz yells out]
Dr. King Schultz: May I lift my hands off the tabletop in order to remove my billfold?!
Calvin Candie: Yes, you may.
[Schultz quickly removes his wallet from his jacket pocket and throws it on the table towards Candie, Stephen picks up the wallet and takes out a wad of cash and starts counting it]
Stephen: That twelve.
[Stephen pockets the cash and throws the wallet back towards Schultz on the table, Candie smashes the hammer on the table and yells]
Calvin Candie: Sold! To the man with the exceptional beard and his unexceptional nigger!
[he throws the hammer down on the table]
Calvin Candie: Mr. Moguy.
Leonide Moguy: Yes, Calvin?
Calvin Candie: Will you make these gentlemen a receipt for twelve thousand dollar, please?
Leonide Moguy: Twelve thousand dollar.
Calvin Candie: Hm.
[to Schultz and Django]
Calvin Candie: It was a pleasure doing business with y’all. Now gentlemen, if you care to join me in the parlor, we will be serving white cake.
[we see Calvin signing over Broomhilda’s bill of sale with Moguy acting as witness, Broomhilda stands next to Django, and watches Candie sign the papers, Schultz is sat in the parlor looking disturbed as he remembers how D’Artagnan was killed, Pooch is also sat in the room holding his shotgun and Lara Lee is sat in the background playing the harp]
Leonide Moguy: Well done, Calvin.
[Schultz, looking upset, turns to Lara Lee as she continues to play the harp]
Dr. King Schultz: Excuse me. Excuse me, ma’am?
[he walks over to her]
Dr. King Schultz: Could you please stop playing Beethoven? Take your hands off the harp!
[he pulls her hands off the harp and opens the parlor doors and goes through to the library]
Stephen: Doctor! Doctor, you can’t go in there!
Calvin Candie: Stephen, Stephen.
Stephen: He ain’t got no business going in there.
Calvin Candie: Let it be. He’s just a little upset, that’s all. I’ll handle this.
[Candie picks up two plates of white cake, and still holding the signed bill of sale, walks over to Schultz in the library]
Calvin Candie: White cake?
Dr. King Schultz: I don’t go in for sweets, thank you.
Calvin Candie: Hm.
[Candie places one plate of cake and the bills of sale on the table nearby and starts eating his own cake, seating down in one of the chairs]
Calvin Candie: You brooding about me getting the best of you, huh?
[Schultz is standing with his back to Candie]
Dr. King Schultz: Actually, I was thinking of that poor devil you fed to the dogs today, D’Artagnan. And I was wondering what Dumas would make of all this.
Calvin Candie: Come again?
[Schultz turns to look at Candie]
Dr. King Schultz: Alexandre Dumas. He wrote ‘The Three Musketeers’.
Calvin Candie: Yes, of course, doctor.
Dr. King Schultz: I figured you must be an admirer. You named your slave after his novel’s lead character.
[he turns his back to Candie again]
Dr. King Schultz: Now, if Alexandre Dumas had been there today, I wonder what he would have made of it?
Calvin Candie: You doubt he’d approve, huh?
[Schultz turns to face Candie again]
Dr. King Schultz: Yes, his approval would be a dubious proposition at best.
Calvin Candie: Soft hearted Frenchie.
Dr. King Schultz: Alexandre Dumas is black.
[Schultz points to the bill of sale on the table nearby]
Dr. King Schultz: Are these Broomhilda’s papers?
Calvin Candie: Yes, they are.
Dr. King Schultz: May I?
Calvin Candie: Of course.
Dr. King Schultz: Thank you.
[Schultz walks over to the table and picks up the papers]
Calvin Candie: That is her bill of sale, her ownership history, and of course, her freedom papers, doctor.
Dr. King Schultz: Would you have ink and pen for me?
Calvin Candie: Right over there on that little table.
Dr. King Schultz: Thank you.
[Schultz goes over to the table, picks up the pen and signs the paper, he then takes the paper and pen to Candie and gives it to him to sign, Candie gives the pen back to Schultz]
Dr. King Schultz: Thank you.
[Schultz looks at the bill of sale]
Dr. King Schultz: Broomhilda Von Shaft…
[he turns and holds out the bill of sale up towards Broomhilda]
Dr. King Schultz: …consider yourself a free woman.
[Broomhilda looks at Django]
[Schultz puts the bills of sale in his back pocket]
Dr. King Schultz: Mister Candie, normally I would say auf wiedersehen, but since what ‘auf wiedersehen’ actually means is ’till I see you again’ and since I never wish to see you again, to you sir, I say goodbye.
[he turns to Django]
Dr. King Schultz: Let’s go.
[Django turns to Broomhilda]
Django: Come on.
[they start walking out to leave]
Calvin Candie: One more moment, doctor!
[Schultz stops and turns to Candie]
Dr. King Schultz: What?
[Candie rises from his seat and turns to face Schultz]
Calvin Candie: It’s a custom here in the South, once a business deal is concluded that the two parties shake hands. It implies good faith.
Dr. King Schultz: I’m not from the South.
[Schultz turns to leave again]
Calvin Candie: But you are in my house, doctor. So I’m afraid I must insist.
Dr. King Schultz: Insist? On what? That I shake your hand? Oh, then I’m afraid I must insist in the opposite direction.
Calvin Candie: You know what I think you are?
Dr. King Schultz: What you think I am? No, I don’t.
Calvin Candie: I think you are a bad loser.
Dr. King Schultz: And I think you’re an abysmal winner.
Calvin Candie: Nevertheless, here in Chickasaw County, a deal ain’t done until the two parties have shook hands. Even after all that paper signin’, don’t mean shit you don’t shake my hand.
Dr. King Schultz: If I don’t shake your hand, you’re gonna throw away twelve thousand dollars? I don’t think so.
Calvin Candie: Mr. Pooch, if she tries to leave here before this nigger-lovin’ German shakes my hand, you cut her ass down.
[Pooch turns to Broomhilda and points his shotgun at her, Django comes over and stands in front of her]
Dr. King Schultz: You really want me to shake your hand?
Calvin Candie: I insist.
[Candie holds out his hand]
Dr. King Schultz: If you insist.
[Schultz walks towards Candie, offering his hand when suddenly the small gun pop out from Schultz sleeve and into his hand and he shoots Candie in the heart, Candie looks down at his bullet wound with shock then falls dead to the floor, everybody in stunned and Stephen starts crying out and goes over to Candie’s body]
Stephen: No! Calvin! Calvin!
[Schultz turns to Django]
Dr. King Schultz: I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist.
[suddenly Schultz is blown away as Pooch fires his sawed-off shotgun at him, Django then grabs hold of Pooch’s hand gun and shoots him with it]
Leonide Moguy: Nigger’s gone crazy! Help!
[Moguy starts to run off when Django turns to shoot at him but misses]
Leonide Moguy: Help, he’s killing everyone!
[as Moguy opens the parlor door Django shoots him, Django then jumps out of the parlor and starts shooting at Candie’s men, then a blood bath of a shooting rampage follows as Django keeps shooting and killing Candie’s men as they come at him]
[as the shootout continues Django runs out of bullets and hides under some fallen furniture, he sees more of Candie’s men enter the house and they start shooting at him]
Stephen: Hold your fire! Hold your fire!
[Candie’s men continue to shoot]
Stephen: Stop shootin’, goddamn it!
[the shooting stops and Stephen comes out of his hiding place from the parlor]
Stephen: We got your woman! Billy Crash here got his pistol upside her head. You don’t stop all that carryin’ on, he gonna blow her goddamn brains out! And that ain’t no threat, horse boy. That there is a promise.
[Billy steps out holding Broomhilda with a gun at her head]
Stephen: Or, you can give up, throw your gun out, we won’t kill Hildi.
Stephen: Honest Injun, Django. I swear ‘fore God. You give up, ain’t no harm gonna come to her.
Django: And I’m supposed to believe your black ass?
Stephen: Personally, I don’t give a good goddamn what you believe or don’t believe! I believe if you don’t give up in the next ten seconds, we gonna blow this bitch’s brains out! Believe that!
[Django pauses trying to think what to do]
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Don’t do it. You give me up.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Just let me go.
Django: They got too much.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Django.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: I love you.
Django: Hold it!
Broomhilda Von Shaft: No.
Django: I give up.
Stephen: I can’t hear you, nigger.
Django: I said, I give up!
[Django throws his gun aside and steps out from under the furniture on seeing this Broomhilda cries out]
Broomhilda Von Shaft: No! No!
[he faces Candie’s men, takes his jacket off then holds his hands up and walks forward into the hall where Candie’s men surround him]
[we see Django has been strung up naked, upside down in the barn, he is unconscious and his is inches off the floor with a muzzle tied to his face, Billy walks into the barn towards Django and wakes him up by hitting his boot against Django’s muzzle]
Billy Crash: Cock-a-doodle-do, nigger.
[he turns and walks to the other side of the barn]
Billy Crash: So y’all bounty hunters, huh? I knew there was something fishy about y’all. We found your wanted posters and book of figures in your saddlebags. I got to say, I ain’t never heard of no black bounty hunter before.
[Billy takes his jacket off and walks back towards Django]
Billy Crash: Black boy paid to kill white men? How’d you like that line of work? Probably pretty good while it lasted, huh?
[Billy heats up his huge knife, holds it up, he walks towards Django and grabs Django’s genitals]
Billy Crash: Time to say good night to them nuts, blackie.
[Django cries out]
Billy Crash: On three. One…
[Django cries out again]
Billy Crash: I got you. Two…
[Django yells out again]
Billy Crash: Calm down, now. Here it comes.
[just then Stephen walks into the barn carrying Django’s clothes under his arm]
Stephen: Crash, Miss Lara want to see you. Somethin’ to do with the Old Man’s funeral. Oh, and she changed her mind about snipping Django.
[Stephen puts Django’s clothes down]
Stephen: She gonna give him to the LeQuint Dickey people.
Billy Crash: Well, she didn’t waste a minute telling me.
[Billy turns to look at Django]
Billy Crash: How disappointin’.
[he turns and leaves the barn]
[as Billy leaves the barn, Stephen closes the barn door behind him and turns to the still bound upside down naked Django]
Stephen: You leavin’. This here what you take with you.
[Stephen picks up Django’s clothes and throws it near Django]
Stephen: Your black ass has been all them motherfuckers at The Big House could talk about for the last few hours. Seem like white folk ain’t never had a bright idea in their life was coming up with all kinds of ways to kill your ass. Now, mind you, most of them ideas had to do with fuckin’ with your fun parts. Now, that may seem like a good idea, but truth is, when you snip a nigger’s nuts, most of them bleed out in, oh, about, hm…seven minutes. Most of ’em. Well, more than most.
[he sits on a stool facing opposite Django]
Stephen: Then I says: “Shitfire. The niggers we sell to LeQuint Dickey got it worse than that.” And they still sayin’, “Let’s whip him to death.” Or “Throw him to the Mandingos”, “Feed him to Stonesipher’s dogs.” And I said, “What’s so special about that? We do that shit all the time. Hells bells, the niggers we sell to LeQuint Dickey got it worse than that.” Lo and behold, out of nowhere, Miss Lara come up with the bright idea of givin’ your ass to the LeQuint Dickey Mining Company. And as a slave of the LeQuint Dickey Mining Company, henceforth, till the day you die, all day, every day, you will be swinging’ a sledgehammer, turning big rocks into little rocks. Now, when you get there, they gonna take away your name, give you a number and a sledgehammer, and say, “Get to work!” One word of sass, they cuts out your tongue. And they good at it too you won’t bleed out. Oh, they does that real good. They gonna work ya. All day, every day, till your back give out. Then they’re gonna hit you in the head with a hammer, throw your ass down the nigger hole. And that will be the story of you, Django.
[on route to the mining company, Django’s hands are tied to a rope and is being led on foot behind one of the transporters, we also see that three of Candie’s Mandingo fighters have been placed inside a cage wagon and they are all being taken to the mining company, as they stop for a rest, Django tries to get the attention of the one of the transporters]
Django: Hey, white boy.
[the transporter ignores him]
Django: I said, hey, white boy!
Frankie: Shut up, black. You ain’t got nothin’ to say I want to hear.
Django: How’d you like to make eleven thousand dollars?
Frankie: Do what, now?
Django: I said how’d you like to make eleven thousand dollars. Eleven thousand five hundred, actually.
Frankie: What the fuck are you talkin’ about?
Django: Back there at that plantation, Candyland, there was an eleven thousand five hundred dollar fortune just sittin’ there, and you all rode right past it.
Frankie: You be damned, blackie. We’re not bandits.
Django: I ain’t saying that. Nice thing about this fortune is it ain’t illegal, you can’t steal it. You got to earn it, white boy.
Frankie: You got something to say, mate, you say it.
Django: The eleven thousand five hundred dollar fortune waitin’ for you back at Candyland is in the form of a “Wanted Dead or Alive” bounty on Smitty Bacall and the Bacall Gang.
Frankie: Who the fuck is Smitty Bacall?
Django: Smitty Bacall is the leader of this murderous gang of stagecoach robbers, the Bacall Gang. There’s a seven thousand dollar “Wanted Dead or Alive” bounty on him. One thousand five hundred dollars for each of his three accomplices: Dandy Michaels, Gerald Nash, and Crazy Craig Koons. Now, all four of them gentlemen, they back there at Candyland laughing their ass off. You know why? Cause they just got away with murder. But it ain’t got to be that way. You and your mates, y’all can ride back there and y’all can go get that money.
Frankie: What’d these jokers do again?
Django: These sons of bitches, they…they killed innocent people. Stagecoach robbery. Innocent white people. I got the handbill right here in my pocket, if you let me get it.
Frankie: Get it out.
[Django takes out the handbill that Schultz had given to him just before he’d killed Smitty Bacall, we see one of the other mining company transporters read from the handbill]
Roy: “Wanted. Dead or alive. Smitty Bacall and the Smitty Bacall Gang.”
Frankie: But you’re a slave.
Roy: “For murder…”
Django: I ain’t no goddamn slave.
Roy: “…and stagecoach robbery.”
Django: Do I sound like a fuckin’ slave?
Roy: “Seven thousand dollars for Smitty Bacall.”
Floyd: That’s a shitload!
Django: I’m a bounty hunter. Yesterday, as a free man, I rode into Candyland on a horse
with my German white partner, Dr. King Schultz. We tracked the Bacall Gang all the way
from Texas to Chickasaw County. We finally found their ass layin’ low in Candyland. We went in there to get ’em, things went sour, my partner got killed, Calvin Candie got shot, then everybody there decided to blame me, so here I am. But y’all know I ain’t on that manifest and all y’all know I ain’t supposed to be on this trip. But them four men is still back there, they’re still wanted, and that eleven thousand five hundred is up for grabs, and the last thing they’d expect is y’all ridin’ back in there and gettin’ it.
Roy: What’s the deal? You tell us who they are and we turn you loose?
Django: No, no, no, no. I ain’t gonna tell you who they are. But, you give me a pistol, one of them horses, and five hundred dollar of that eleven thousand five hundred, and I’ll point ’em out to you.
[as Floyd and Roy consider Django’s offer]
Roy: This is a real handbill.
Floyd: Now just ’cause it’s a real handbill doesn’t mean that other bunch of malarkey is.
Roy: Now why would a slave have a “Wanted Dead or Alive” handbill in his pocket?
[they open the cage door holding the Candie’s three Mandingo fighters]
Roy: Did that black ride into Candyland yesterday?
[the Mandingo fighters look at each other but say nothing, Roy takes his gun out and points it at the men in the cage]
Roy: Alright, I’m gonna ask you again. I want you to remember, I don’t like liars. Is he a Candyland slave, or did he ride in with a white man on a horse yesterday?
Big Fred: Yeah. They walked us from the Greenville auction, and he rode in on a horse
with a white man.
Roy: Now this white man, was the black his slave?
Rodney: He weren’t no slave.
Floyd: You…you fuckin’ sure about that?
Rodney: Damn sure.
Roy: Alright. What happened over in Candyland?
Chicken Charlie: Buncha shootin’, master got shot.
Roy: Who shot him?
Chicken Charlie: The German.
Roy: Why’d he do that?
Chicken Charlie: Nigger and the German was actin’ like they were slavers but they wasn’t.
Roy: Well, what were they?
Rodney: Bounty hunters.
Floyd: Fuck me, Roy. I mean, this could…this could be big, mate.
[Roy and Floyd walk back to Django and Frankie]
Roy: Well, smoke, you got a deal.
Django: I got one more condition.
Roy: What’s that?
Django: When we get there, when time come, you let me help you kill ’em.
[he starts laughing]
Floyd: You’re a funny bugger.
Roy: Cut him loose.
Floyd: Yeah, yeah. You got yourself a deal, blackie.
[Django replies in an Australian accent]
Django: You got yourself a deal, mate.
[this makes Floyd laugh]
Floyd: Hey! You’re alright for a black fella. Oh, yeah.
[he cuts the rope around Django’s wrists]
Floyd: There we go. There you go, mate.
Roy: We’re gonna give you that packhorse over there.
Django: What them saddlebags got in ’em?
Django: No. I ain’t ridin’ no horse with no goddamn dynamite on its back.
Roy: I can understand that. Frankie, why don’t you take them sticks off that horse and stick ’em in the nigger cage.
[Frankie opens the cage]
Frankie: A little dynamite for you black fellas to play with.
[he throws one of the saddlebags containing the dynamite into the cage and the three men inside jump up making Frankie laugh]
Roy: Now, Floyd, you got that rifle up on the wagon, don’t you?
Floyd: Yeah, right.
Roy: Why don’t you give him your gun and gun belt?
[to Django as he takes his gun belt off]
Floyd: Now, don’t drop the fuckin’ thing, alright? I’ve just had the sights fixed and they’re perfect.
[he hands over the belt with the gun to Django]
Django: Oh, that’s good to know.
[without taking the gun out of the holster, Django shoots Floyd and then takes the gun out and shoots Roy, as Frankie is carrying the other saddlebag of dynamite towards the cage he turns to shoot but Django shoots the saddlebag which explodes, blowing Frankie up; the three men in the cage watch as Django takes Roy’s gun, walk up to the wagon, takes the saddle off one of the horses and unhooks it from the wagon, he climbs onto the horse and rides up to the back of the cage were the door has been left open and looks at the three men inside]
Django: Throw me up that dynamite.
[Rodney throws him the dynamite, Django turns and rides off towards Candyland, the three men watch him ride off with admiration]
[back in Candyland, we see Broomhilda being locked up, then we see Candie’s trackers hanging out in their tracker shack when they hear the dogs barking outside]
Mr. Stonesipher: Jake!
Mr. Stonesipher: Get out there and see what’s wrong with them goddamn dogs!
[as Jake stands to go outside suddenly the door bursts open and Django appears and he starts shooting at the trackers]
Django: D’Artagnan, motherfuckers!
[he shoots and kills all the trackers, then we see Django riding off again towards Candyland, back in Candyland we see Candie’s coffin being carried and getting ready to be buried]
[Django arrives in Candyland and enters the barn, he finds his bundle of clothes then sees Schultz body has been dumped in the corner of the barn, he walks up to Schultz’ body and finds Broomhilda’s bill of sale and freedom papers tucked at the back of Schultz’s pants, he takes them, then kisses his hand and gently touches Schultz head]
Django: Auf Wiedersehen.
[Django turns and leaves, he finds Broomhilda in the shack she’s been locked up in, she’s lying in bed crying]
Django: It’s me, baby.
[she gets out of bed and runs into his arms and they start kissing]
[Candie’s family and house slaves return back to the house from the funeral at night, as they enter the house Stephen sings]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Cora, Would you prepare us some coffee?
Stephen: Sheba, you help her.
Cora: Come on.
[as Cora and Sheba go to prepare coffee, they hear another voice singing the same song as Stephen was, they look up to see Django, dressed in one of Candie’s suits, lighting a candle]
Django: Oh, y’all gonna be together with Calvin in the by-and-by, alright.
[he takes the lighted candle and walks towards the balcony and looks down at everybody below]
Django: Just a bit sooner than y’all was expectin’.
[as Billy goes to draw his gun, Django quickly draws his gun out and shoots him and his men, Billy lies on the floor yelling out in pain]
Django: Billy Crash. Now, where were we? Oh, that’s right. Last time I seen you, you had your hands on my…
[he shoots Billy’s genitals and Billy yells out in pain]
Billy Crash: D-jango! You black son of a bitch!
Django: The D is silent, hillbilly.
[Django shoots Billy in the head and kills him]
Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly: Oh, no!
[after Django’s killed Billy]
Django: Now, all you black folks, I suggest you get away from all these white folks.
[Stephen quickly goes to open the front door]
Django: Not you, Stephen. You right where you belong.
[looking at Cora]
Django: Oh, Cora, before you go, will you tell Miss Lara goodbye?
Cora: Do what now?
Django: I said, tell Miss Lara goodbye.
[Cora looks at Lara Lee]
Cora: Bye, Miss Lara.
[Django shoots and kills Lara Lee, Cora and Sheba look at Django in terror]
Django: Y’all two run along now.
[Cora and Sheba turn and quickly leave the house, Broomhilda, who’s sat on Django’s horse, Tony, outside the house and holding onto Schultz’s horse, Fritz, sees Cora and Sheba making a run for it; back in the house Django and Stephen are alone]
Django: Stephen, how you like my new duds? You know, before now I didn’t know that burgundy was my color.
[Stephen looks down and the dead bodies around him, then drops his cane and takes a couple of steps forward without a limp]
Stephen: I count six shots, nigger.
[Django quickly takes out two gun from his gun belt and holds them up]
Django: I count two guns, nigger.
Django: You said in seventy-six years on this plantation, you seen all manner of shit done to niggers. But I notice, you didn’t mention kneecappin’.
[Django shoots at one of Stephen’s kneecaps and Stephen yells out in pain]
Stephen: Oh, God! Motherfucker! Damn it!
[Django starts walking down the stairs]
Django: Seventy-six years, Stephen. How many niggers you think you see come and go, huh? Seven thousand? Eight thousand? Nine thousand? Nine thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine? Every single word that came out of Calvin Candie’s mouth was nothin’ but horseshit. But he was right about one thing, I am that one nigger in ten thousand.
[Django shoots a bullet into Stephen’s other kneecap, Stephen yells out in pain and falls to the ground, Django slowly walks past him]
Stephen: You son of a bitch! Aah! You motherfucker! Oh, sweet Jesus, let me kill this nigger! You ain’t gonna get away with this, Django! They gonna catch your black ass. You gonna be on the wanted posters now, nigger. Them bounty hunters gonna be lookin’ for you.
[Django walks towards the door and looks back at Stephen]
Stephen: You can run, nigger, but they gonna find your ass! And when they do, oh, Lord, what they gonna do to your ass!
[Django takes Candie’s cigar, which is in its cigar holder, and lights up the end of the dynamite cable that he has rigged the house with]
Stephen: They ain’t gonna just kill you, nigger! You done fucked up! This Candyland, nigger! You can’t destroy Candyland!
[as the lighted cable on the dynamite continues to quickly burn its way towards the dynamite sticks, Django opens the door and leaves the house, Stephen continues yelling out]
Stephen: We been here! There’s always gonna be a Candyland!
[Broomhilda sees Django walks out of the house and smiles, Django puts on his shades and turns to look back at the house, Stephen carries on yelling out as the cable on the dynamites continues to burn closer to the sticks]
Stephen: Can’t no nigger gunfighter kill all the white folks in the world! They gonna find your black ass!
[outside, Django waits looking at the house and Broomhilda puts her fingers in her ears]
Stephen: Django! You uppity son of a…!
[suddenly the cable burns out as it reaches the stick of dynamites and the house explodes, Django turns to look at Broomhilda they smile at each other and she does a silent clap for him, he starts walking towards her[
Django: Hey, Little Trouble Maker.
Broomhilda Von Shaft: Hey, Big Trouble Maker.
[Django gets onto Schultz’s horse and the horse does a little show as it goes towards Broomhilda]
[last lines; we see flashback to when Schultz was teaching Django how to become a bounty hunter during the winter in the snowy mountains]
Dr. King Schultz: You know what they’re going to call you? “The fastest gun in the South.”
[back at the burning grounds of Candyland, Django and Broomhilda get ready to leave]
Django: Let’s get outta here.
[after the credits end we see cut back to the three Mandingo fighters that were in the mining company cage after Django had left them and ridden off]
Chicken Charlie: Who was that nigger?
Total Quotes: 94