New Year's Eve Movie Quotes(Page 2)
[in Times Square and Ryan Seacrest is feeling the pressure of the crowd when the giant ball gets stuck on its way up he turns to one his production crew]
Ryan Seacrest: Cause I’m starting to feel a bit of pressure. I don’t like to feel pressure. Pressure’s not a very good feel and it messes with my hair. I need my hair to be up, like the ball!
[as Claire and her crew try to fix the problem with the giant ball]
Ryan Seacrest: This would never have happened to Dick Clark.
[as Sam is getting a ride with the Pastor and his family in the giant RV]
Maude: So what’s the speech about, Sam?
Sam: Like I said, I haven’t even written it yet. I guess I’m…I’m still looking for the inspiration.
Maude: What inspires you, Sam?
Duncan: Excellent. Sweet!
[Paul takes Ingrid to the art museum where they have a miniature reproduction of the New York boroughs]
Paul: And now the very best part; walk all five boroughs in one day. I’m crossing that off the list.
[after leaving a message for Randy telling him about Ingrid and referring to her as pathetic, he then turns to read from Ingrid’s list of resolutions]
Paul: Right. Next up, is to be amazed.
Paul: Which is very vague. I will be amazed if I can come up with something. But I will.
[Ingrid walks up to Paul and is upset after overhearing Paul referring to her as pathetic]
Ingrid: I don’t want to do this anymore.
Paul: Why? What are you talking about?
Ingrid: I’m pathetic. Dude!
[she slams the tickets to the ball into his hands and turns to walk away]
Paul: Hey. Wait! Where are you going?
Ingrid: Staten Island.
Engineer Douglas: Miss Morgan, we’re not really sure what’s wrong.
Claire Morgan: How long is it gonna take to be sure?
Engineer Douglas: I don’t know. It could be a couple of minutes, it could be a couple of hours, maybe more.
Claire Morgan: Well, we don’t have a couple of hours or maybe more. We only have…midnight. I have one job tonight, to make sure, even if I have to do it with my own two hands, that ball descends at midnight. Can’t move midnight!
[the Engineer looks down]
Claire Morgan: Why are you looking at your shoes? I hate it when you look at your shoes. When you look at your shoes it means you’re not telling me something. What are you not telling me?
Engineer Douglas: We need Kominsky.
Claire Morgan: The Kominsky?
[the Engineer nods his head]
[Griffin comes home and finds Tess standing on her head]
Griffin Byrne: What are you doing?
Tess Byrne: Yoga. It’s supposed to help.
Griffin Byrne: I’m no expert, but it seems like that would just the baby in the wrong direction.
Tess Byrne: You’re gonna make such a good veterinarian someday, Griff.
Griffin Byrne: Thanks. And if you were a horse, I’d know better what to do. Of course, if you were a horse, we’d never get invited to dinner parties and I’d be married to a horse.
[taking a sniff from the small bottle]
Griffin Byrne: This smells awful. Drink it.
[Tess shakes her head]
Tess Byrne: Mm-mm.
Griffin Byrne: What? It’s castor oil. Mary Poppins swore by this.
Tess Byrne: Mary Poppins also danced with cartoon penguins. You first.
Griffin Byrne: You’re a coward.
[he takes a swig from the bottle but nearly spits it out as it’s so disgusting]
Tess Byrne: I’m sensing a thumps down.
Griffin Byrne: Oh, Mary Poppins sucks!
Tess Byrne: Well you forgot about the spoon full of sugar.
[after feeling a twinge]
Tess Byrne: What was that?
Griffin Byrne: What was what?
Tess Byrne: Oh, my gosh! My water broke!
Griffin Byrne: All of it?
Tess Byrne: Oh…well what do you think?
Griffin Byrne: Well, that’s too early! Can you turn it off?
Tess Byrne: And how do you suggest I do that?
Griffin Byrne: I don’t know! Yoga! Why don’t you get back upside down? You can’t do a downward dog or an upward dog. Do one of the dogs!
[back at the hospital Aimee is sitting with Stan while he’s dosing]
Stan Harris: Haven’t you been here all day? When do you go home?
Nurse Aimee: Just before midnight.
Stan Harris: Oh.
Nurse Aimee: You know what? I don’t care about all that hoopla and stuff anyway.
Stan Harris: So no big plans or party?
Nurse Aimee: No.
Stan Harris: No hot date? A pretty girl like you.
Nurse Aimee: Well, maybe. But right now you’re my hot date.
Stan Harris: Why?
Nurse Aimee: Pardon me?
Stan Harris: Why are you being nice to me? I’m an ass. I’ve spent my entire life being an ass. I don’t know how to stop.
Nurse Aimee: Well, you know what, Stan? Maybe being an ass is the reason you’ve gotten every single thing you ever wanted in life.
Stan Harris: Not everything.
[Randy and Elise are still stuck in the elevator]
Randy: I’m sorry I called you a groupie. We’re stuck in an elevator together, you really, you’re not gonna talk to me at all?
Elise: Fine. We can talk. But as long as we’re making assumptions about each other, why don’t I give it a shot? You grew up in suburban, fill in the blank. You went to la-di-da liberal art school. You didn’t have enough drive to get a real job and then you grew half a beard and moved to Manhattan on your grandmother’s inheritance. And…and now you think that, you know, just because you moved somewhere that you’re cool. But the truth is that, it just, it doesn’t! Okay? Because you’re just some wanna be hipster who judges everything because you’re too scared to take a chance on anything. And…and you know my guess is that this whole hatred for New Year’s comes from just some boring as hell prom queen who broke you heart on New Year’s Eve in high school. So, am I close?
Randy: Suburban Maryland. Tufts University. And I am comic book artist.
Elise: You draw.
Randy: I illustrate. And it was in college, when she broke it. And this beard took me like a year to grow.
[they both smile]
Randy: Cold coffee?
[he holds out the flask to her]
[back on the giant RV Sam is making small talk with the Pastor’s family]
Sam: Last year there were so many speeches that I had to get outside and get some fresh air, so I actually went out and got a pizza.
Maude: Did anything else happen?
[Sam looks down]
Maude: Oh, my! Something else did happen, didn’t it?
Grandpa Jed: Is it R-rated?
Sam: I met a woman and she was extraordinary.
[to her son]
Maude: It’s gonna have a goose bump ending!
Pastor Edwin: Well take your time telling it, because here comes the traffic.
[Grandpa Jed comes up behind Sam]
Grandpa Jed: Extraordinary build?
Sam: I have to get to this party.
[Ahern Records Masquerade Ball]
Penny Marshall: You’re an actress, right?
Ahern Waitress: Yeah! I’ve played a nurse, a cop, a teacher.
Penny Marshall: How about playing a waitress and get me another drink?
[back in the elevator]
Elise: I went to Juilliard and I’m a backup singer, not a back of the tour bus groupie.
Randy: Randy. A.K.A, Mr. Moron. How long have you been a backup singer?
Elise: Too long. Oh, I…I just got hired for tonight, but I was hoping that he would ask me to go on tour with him. But, uh…
Randy: Can you sing something for me?
Elise: Oh, no! The only time that I do performances for audiences of one is when I’m in the shower, so.
Randy: Well, we…
Elise: Don’t…say anything.
[over in Times Square, the ball is still stuck and Kominsky has been called out to fix it]
Claire Morgan: Thank you so much for coming.
Kominsky: You fire me.
Claire Morgan: No. No. No. That was someone else. No. So what do you think it is?
Claire Morgan: What’s short?
Brendan: There’s a short in the ball.
Kominsky: You got it.
Brendan: It sounds pretty straight forward. Easy to fix.
Kominsky: Then you fix.
[he turns to leave but Claire stops him]
Claire Morgan: No!
Kominsky: Not so easy. This ball has thirty five hundred lighting clues.
Brendan: Cues. He means cues.
Claire Morgan: Wait. You have to find the one light that went out in over three thousand?
Claire Morgan: Well how do we not progress passed the string of Christmas lights that all go out because of one bad one?
Kominsky: My question also, and then I get fired!
[he turns to leave again but Claire stops him]
Claire Morgan: We need you! I need you.
Kominsky: Okay. Then I go visit my ball on the roof.
[while Kominsky is fixing the ball, Claire gives a speech to the reporters and the waiting crowd]
Claire Morgan: As you all can see the ball has stopped half way to its porch. It’s suspended there to remind us before we pop the champagne and celebrate the New Year, to stop and reflect on the year that has gone by. To remember both our triumphs and our missteps, our promises made and broken. The times we opened ourselves up to great adventures or close our self down for fear of getting hurt. Cause that’s what New Year’s is all about, getting another chance. The chance to forgive, to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more. And stop worrying about what if and start embracing what will be. So when that ball drops at midnight, and it will drop, let’s remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other. And not just tonight, but all year long. Thank you.
[on the giant RV bus, Sam is telling the pastor’s family how he and his mystery girl last New Year’s]
Maude: I wanna hear the rest of your story.
Sam: We talked for…it felt like hours.
Grandpa Jed: Did you bang her?
Pastor Edwin: Dad, you’re talking to a man in a tuxedo.
Sam: Jed, I can’t talk like that in front of a lady.
Maude: He’s a gentlemen.
Sam: We talked, alright? I went on about the business and how our stock had just gone public and she stops me and she puts her hand over mind and she says, ‘That’s all great, but how’s your heart?’ How’s your heart? Who say that? I mean, who…?
Grandpa Jed: Please! Please!
[referring to Sam’s mystery New Year’s Eve girl]
Maude: Did you at least kiss her?
Sam: Yes, at midnight.
Grandpa Jed: And that’s it?
Sam: Well I went to the restaurant a bit later when I came back, she was gone. She left something on the table.
Grandpa Jed: Naked picture?
Maude: Let me see.
[Sam gets his wallet out and takes out a napkin note and puts it in front of Maude]
Grandpa Jed: Read it out loud, Maude.
Maude: Things are complicated. If you’re still thinking about me in a year, meet me back here at LA Gambina Trattoria at midnight, next New Year’s eve.
[Sam says the last lines out loud at the same time that Maude is reading it out loud]
Grandpa Jed: You memorized it.
Maude: You’re gonna meet her, aren’t you?
Sam: Yeah. I don’t…I don’t think so. I don’t even know her name!
Maude: You’re afraid!
Sam: She’s not gonna be there. It was one night, it wasn’t even real.
Grandpa Jed: But this napkin is and you’ve been carrying it around for a year. I mean, you went out for a slice of pizza and you may have run into ‘the one’. Do you know what that is?
Pastor Edwin: Not insanity. Serendipity. Mm? And you don’t mess with serendipity.
Pastor Edwin: I mean what’s the worst that can happen? She doesn’t show up and you go back to your party.
[Maude looks at Sam as he goes all quiet]
Maude: Oh, that’s not it at all. Is it, Sam? You’re afraid that she will show up.
Grandpa Jed: I’ll tell you what?
[he takes the napkin note from Sam]
Grandpa Jed: I’ll take care of this for you. I can tap this.
Sam: What? You can tap this!
Grandpa Jed: I’m gonna and tap this for you.
Sam: You’re gonna tap that?
Grandpa Jed: Look, I’m a widower. Right?
Maude: Forgive him.
[Paul receives a call from his sister Kim asking if he’s seen Hailey as Kim looks for her in a bar]
Paul: I’m confused, I thought you had plans tonight?
Kim: I sort of did, but I chose to be with Hailey and now she’s gone!
Paul: You know what? I’m not really worried about Hailey, I’m actually more worried about you. If you’re not working, you need to go out and have some fun. You gotta let your hair down, you gotta leave the clogs at home.
Kim: What? Great. More clog commentary!
[suddenly a drunken man from the bar drops on Kim’s lap and she moves him aside]
Kim: Listen, Paul. Right now, all I really…all I really need to do is just find Hailey.
Paul: Alright. Look, she’s a good kid. Okay? If she did happen to call her cool uncle to say where she’d be, she may in fact have said the fifty fourth street pen. But please don’t rat out the cool uncle.
Kim: Oh, my God! Paul, thank you! Thank you! Thank you so much! Thank You!
[as Kim is about to hang up the phone]
Paul: Wait! Wait! Wait! Sis! Sis, hold on! I got a huge favor to ask.
Kim: Anything. What? What? What?
[Paul finds Ingrid having a coffee in the museum cafe]
Paul: Be amazed! I got it. Ingrid, please don’t let this whole thing be ruined because I’m a big mouth idiot. I’m sick and tired of being that guy. Please, Ingrid. Please! Come with me.
Paul: Come on! Let’s go!
Ingrid: On one condition.
[cut to Ingrid driving Paul’s scooter while Paul hangs on to her at the back]
Brendan: That was a nice speech.
Claire Morgan: I was just trying to save my job.
Brendan: No, I don’t think so. I think you were talking about you.
Claire Morgan: Okay, maybe I was. But all I can do is reflect and try and do better next year.
Brendan: Or sooner.
Claire Morgan: Why did I tell you about him?
Brendan: I’m a New York cop, people they tell me things.
Claire Morgan: I’m sure he’s forgotten it by now.
Brendan: You should go.
Claire Morgan: I don’t move until the ball moves.
[at the hospital, Tess and Griffin are ready to have the baby, but Grace and James Schwab show up at the same time to have their baby]
Male Nurse: Contractions?
Griffin Byrne: Contractions, six and a half minutes apart.
James Schwab: Six? We have five minutes apart.
Male Nurse: Cervix?
Griffin Byrne: She has one.
Male Nurse: Huh?
Griffin Byrne: Uh…four centimeters dilated.
James Schwab: Four? We have five, six, seven! Maybe eight!
[Grace moans with pain and James rushes over to her and sticks his head between her legs, talking to the baby]
James Schwab: Don’t you show your head to me young lady! Not yet! Papa will tell you when it’s time, okay?
[to Griffin as they watch the other couple]
Tess Byrne: Oh, please don’t yell at my vagina.
Griffin Byrne: Oh, I never will.
Grace Schwab: It’s amazing, she really listens to James! She just crawled right back up in there!
Male Nurse: Well the nurses will take you to your room. Gentlemen, to your corner. And ladies, may the best v-jay jay win.
[back at the hospital Stan talks to Aimee thinking she’s someone he once knew]
Stan Harris: You’re so good. You always were.
Nurse Aimee: Well, I’m not really that good.
Stan Harris: Yes, you are. I’ve been thinking about the ball drop and how that always used to be our thing. Remember when I took you to New York for the first time? We watched the ball drop together, remember? It was our night. I promised you we’d be…we’d go back there. Well, it’s a promise I didn’t live up to. I’m sorry. Why did I leave you?
Nurse Aimee: Stan, I’m Aimee. Remember? Nurse Aimee. Huh?
Stan Harris: Uh-huh. Right. Right. Aimee.
[back in the elevator]
Elise: We’ve been stuck in here for hours. I can’t believe nobody’s found us yet.
[she sits down to think for a moment]
Elise: We could have our own party.
Randy: Mm. I don’t think so.
Elise: Oh, come on! We gotta do something to get you out of your…your New Year’s Eve funk.
[she grabs some decorations out of Randy’s garbage bag]
Elise: We’re at a party. You’re standing on one end of the room alone and I’m on the other.
Randy: We’ve never met.
[she puts on a party hat]
You May Also Like: