Starring: Diane Keaton, Jacki Weaver, Pam Grier, Rhea Perlman, Celia Weston, Phyllis Somerville, Alisha Boe, Charlie Tahan, Bruce McGill
OUR RATING: ★★½
Comedy directed by Zara Hayes. The story follows Martha (Diane Keaton), who after moving into a retirement community, starts a cheerleading squad with her fellow residents, Sheryl (Jacki Weaver), Alice (Rhea Perlman), and Olive (Pam Grier), proving that it’s never too late to follow your dreams.
Our Favorite Quote:'We're all so self-conscious, and we're all so worried about what everyone else is thinking. When, of course, the only thing that really matters is what we think of ourselves.' - Martha (Poms) Click To Tweet
Best Quotes (Total Quotes: 27)
Vicki: Now, what brings you to Sun Springs?
Martha: Oh, I’m just here to die.
Vicki: Well, I think we can aim a little bit higher than that.
[they both laugh]
[referring to Sun Springs Retirement Community]
Vicki: We’ve got everything you could ever need. We’ve got three golf courses, two bowling alleys, oh, an indoor pool, and the outdoor pool. The works.
Vicki: I always say, “If you’re bored in Sun Springs, you just need to be watered.”
Vicki: All our residents are required to join at least one club.
Vicki: Now, there are over a hundred of them. In the unlikely event that you can’t find the right club for you. Fun fact!
Vicki: You can start your own!
Sheryl: Hi! Moving in?
Martha: Oh. Yeah.
Sheryl: I was hoping you’d be a man.
Martha: Excuse me?
Sheryl: Did you know single women outlive single men by almost ten years? And Lord knows there’s not enough erections around here as it is.
Martha: Oh, we’re talking erections, huh? Wow.
[referring to her cheerleader uniform]
Sheryl: What’s this?
Martha: Oh, no, it’s just a bunch of old junk.
Sheryl: You were a cheerleader? Oh, aren’t you full of surprises? Ms. Pep Squad. Queen of the campus.
Martha: Yeah, in another life, I guess you’d call it. I used to just come running home so that I could practice all afternoon, and it drove my mom totally crazy. That’s how bad I wanted it. Yeah. And I tried out three times and I never made the cut. But get this. Finally, in my senior year, I made the varsity squad.
Sheryl: Better late than never!
Martha: Yeah. On the day before our first game, I found out that my mother was very sick. So, I quit the team, you know, started to take care of her. Man, you know. Oh, my God. I, you know, I never did perform.
Martha: No, that’s…
Sheryl: Maybe you should give it another shot.
Martha: Yeah, maybe the Dallas Cowgirls have an opening, right?
Martha: I have an announcement to make. We’re starting a cheerleading club at Sun Springs.
Sheryl: Is that the set-up or the punchline?
Martha: No, no, no. I’m really serious, right? I mean, I have to join a club. I don’t like any of their clubs, so I’m creating my own. Yes. Come on, seriously!
Sheryl: You do know how old you are.
Martha: What’s the difference? I mean, we’ll learn a few moves. There’s nothing to it. I…
Sheryl: Hey, what’s this “we”?
Martha: I know this sounds so crazy, but I can’t do it without you.
Martha: We’re starting a cheerleading club.
Vicki: But who will you be cheering for?
Martha: Ourselves. And, of course, we will be performing for the Senior Showcase.
Vicki: Oh, will you? Well, I’m sorry, but we can’t allow this.
Sheryl: Oh, come off it. Why not?
Vicki: Well, insurance, for one thing.
Martha: There’s nothing dangerous about this. It’s just for fun.
Vicki: Well, we also have Sun Spring’s reputation to think about.
Martha: It’s cheerleading, not pole dancing.
[auditioning to find cheerleaders for their club]
Olive: Hi, I’m Olive. I don’t have any cheerleading experience, but my husband and I, we take a tango class.
Martha, Sheryl: Oh.
Olive: It was either tango or a divorce, so.
Martha: You know what you could do is, you could just show us what you’ve got.
Olive: Let me begin.
Sheryl: So, um, Alice, we notice you signed up for the cheerleading try-outs.
Alice: Oh, yes, I saw your flyer. It sounded fun.
Sheryl: Oh, why didn’t you come?
Alice: Well, I wanted to. But my husband doesn’t like me out too much on my own. I took a sewing class last year, and he had to make his own dinners on Wednesday nights.
Martha: Well, that sounds traumatic, of course.
Sheryl: What if we practiced in the morning, and then you could get home in time for dinner? Yeah!
Alice: Yeah, well, it’s not just that.
Alice: No. He’s worried about the morality of it.
Martha: The morality?
Alice: Yes, he says that anyone who wants to be a cheerleader at my age is either a slut or a whore. And probably both.
Martha: Maybe he should just take his caveman-like opinions and shove them up his you know what. I mean…
Sheryl: Hey, Alice…
Martha: Oh, sorry.
Sheryl: … we’re just a bunch of nice ladies, looking for some clean, wholesome fun.
Martha: Okay, yes.
Sheryl: What do you say?
Alice: Well, I always did want to be a cheerleader. Maybe I could ask him one more time.
[after Alice returns from asking her husband about joinging their cheerleading club]
Sheryl: Did you ask him?
Alice: I did.
Sheryl: And? What did he say?
Alice: “Over my dead body.”
[attending Alice’s husband funeral]
Martha: Oh, God. That was fast, wasn’t it?
Sheryl: A little too fast, if you ask me.
Martha: No, he confused his meds. I’m sure Alice didn’t want to kill him.
Sheryl: Well, she always wanted to be a cheerleader.
Martha: Oh, come on. The woman is devastated, and I’m sure it was the last thing that was on her mind.
[as Alice is walking past them behind her husband’s coffin, she turns to them]
Alice: See you at practice.
[she smiles to herself for a moment]
[as they are practicing]
Helen: I have to be careful!
Helen: I had my knee replaced last year.
Martha: Well, that’s, no, that’s perfectly fine. You can just bend at your hips.
Ruby: I can’t jump too much because I get dizzy. When I jump too much, I get dizzy.
Martha: You do?
Sheryl: Martha, maybe we should make a list of everybody’s conditions.
[the ladies start chatting among themselves]
Martha: [to Sheryl] We’re not making a list.
[as they make a list of everyone’s medical conditions]
Ruby: You got my dizziness down, right?
Sheryl: Yeah, got that.
Evelyn: And sciatica. I have the sciatica.
Sheryl: Oh, right.
Olive: And my wrist.
Sheryl: Oh! Did I mention I had chlamydia?
Martha: Yeah, that and a shocking amount of other personal information, so can we get back to rehearsing?
Alice: But what about you, Martha? Do you have anything to report?
Martha: No, I’m fine. I’m actually, I’m just as fit as a fiddle.
Ben: You got to listen to me for a second. You can’t do this.
Ben: Okay, this is a bad, bad idea.
Sheryl: Oh, don’t be so dramatic.
Ben: Grandma, you are going to humiliate yourself in front of the entire school!
Martha: The entire school? The entire school?
Martha: What are we talking about here, huh? Huh?
Ben: You don’t know?
[as they are about to perform in front of the whole school]
Paige: Break a hip.
Sheryl: Get pregnant.
Sheryl: Actually, we need you.
Chloe: For what?
Martha: Well, we want you to be our choreographer.
Martha: That’s right. We’re putting our squad back together. And as you may have noticed, we have a few rough edges, but we’ve seen you. We have. You’re good.
Martha: And we need some of that.
[referring to Chloe]
Olive: Why would we let her coach us?
Sheryl: Because, Olive, in case you haven’t noticed, we could do with a little help.
Helen: We’re not even a club anymore. Vicki banned us.
Sheryl: Oh, forget Vicki. We will practice in secret.
Olive: Practice for what? The Showcase is over.
Martha: We’re going to find someplace else to perform, okay?
Alice: We humiliated ourselves. Everybody saw it.
Martha: And that’s the reason why we need to do this. To prove we’re not some joke, and to show the world what we can really do! We really can do this if we do this together.
[to her cheerleading group]
Martha: I want you to really, really look in that mirror, and take in yourselves, right? Look closely. We’re all so self-conscious, and we’re all so worried about what everyone else is thinking. When, of course, the only thing that really matters is what we think of ourselves.
[Martha is showing them the site for the South Coast Classic competition]
Sheryl: A competition?
Chloe: This is a really big deal. People come from all over to compete. You guys can’t compete
next to real cheerleaders.
Martha: Yes, we can!
Chloe: The oldest category is eighteen plus!
Sheryl: So what? We’re eighteen plus.
Sheryl: Eighteen plus fifty.
Sheryl: Oh, look.
Sheryl: It’s on in three weeks.
Martha: Well, that’s okay, because Chloe’s going to help us. Right, Chloe?
Chloe: No! No, you guys didn’t say anything about a competition. Do you know how much training that involves? People train for a year, not three weeks!
Martha: Okay. What do you think?
Sheryl: I say screw it. Let’s sign up.
Chloe: Oh, my God.
Chloe: Sheryl, that was so badass of you to stick up for me back there.
Sheryl: Aw. You’re one of us now. Except with higher boobies.
[referring to Martha having cancer]
Sheryl: Why didn’t you tell me?
Martha: Why would I?
Sheryl: Because you tell your friends when you got cancer, for Christ’s sake.
Sheryl: Anyway. The doctor says you’ll be out tomorrow. And once they drain away all the fluid, you’ll be feeling fine. And that’s good because the competition’s in three days.
Martha: I’m not going.
Sheryl: Oh, yes, you are. The hell you’re not.
Martha: No, you don’t even need me! What am I..
Sheryl: Yes, we, of course we need you! You’re the leader. And I’m not going to let you quit just like that. You are coming to the competition, if I have to drag you there myself.
Martha: I’m dying.
Sheryl: Well, you were dying yesterday, and you’re going to be dying next week. And in the meantime, you should be dancing your ass off. Isn’t that what this was all about?
[Martha begins to cry]
Martha: I’m scared. I’m scared, okay?
Sheryl: I know, I know.
Martha: I’m sorry, it’s just…
Sheryl: I know you’re scared, of course.
Martha: I’m so scared.
Sheryl: Sometimes you just have to look that shit in the face and tell it to go to hell.
Martha: Thank you.
Martha: Thank you, for being my friend.
Chloe: [to Sheryl] I’ve never had a grandma before, and now it’s like I have eight.
[as they are about to go up next in the cheerleading competition]
Sheryl: [to Martha] Everybody’s freaking out!
Ruby: I feel sick!
Alice: My stupid dickhead husband was right! I can’t do this!
[speech to the cheerleading team as they are about to go up next in the competition]
Chloe: Guys, don’t worry about the audience! Just follow each other like we practiced, okay? We got this. Martha?
Chloe: Anything you’d like to add?
Martha: I know I told you we could do this. But the truth is I have no idea what’s going to happen out there. Maybe we’ll make fools of ourselves, right? But I do know one thing. There’s no one I’d rather go out there with than you ladies. I love you! I love you all! Okay? Now, I know you’re scared. Wooh. I’m scared too.
Martha: But, you know, sometimes you just have to look that shit in the face and tell it to go to hell!
[they all cheer]
[one year later; as the Sun Springs Cheerleaders are getting ready to perform in support of ovarian cancer research]
Chloe: Okay, everyone. Two minutes. Let’s huddle in. Huddle in. Alright, don’t worry about the crowd. It’s just us out there. You got this. Sheryl, anything you’d like to add?
Sheryl: Just one thing. We’re doing this for Martha.
All: For Martha.
Total Quotes: 27
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