By Jeff Bronner


Well, I just walked out of The Counselor, and I have to say it was easily the worst movie I have ever seen. I am a peaceful, loving person, and my honest response was to tear down the twenty foot cut-out poster in the movie lobby (true story!). I felt so deeply manipulated and lied to during the movie that I needed an outlet for my rage! And before you think I’m a nut, I’m actually an aspiring screenwriter who has almost sold several projects.

So why is it so bad? First off, Cormac McCarthy LOVES the sound of his own voice. He gives the characters these long-winded speeches that have nothing to do with anything. Have you ever seen Breaking Bad? That is a well-done version of the drug world. This is the worst, most elusive, most banal version I have ever seen.

SPOILER ALERT: Secondly, in a normal Hollywood movie, there is a main character who has to overcome obstacles and bad guys to win something. Well, in The Counselor, there is a main guy, and when his whole world gets threatened and turned upside down, he just takes it in the ass because THERE IS NO BAD GUY to fight against. It’s the nameless, faceless Cartel that the movie states over and over and over that you don’t have a chance against.

I guess you could say its Cameron Diaz’s character manipulating everything, but you never know for sure. I feel like the most important scenes — like the ones explaining what the hell was going on — were either never written or were left on the cutting room floor. They must have not had enough flowery bullshit for Mr. McCarthy.

Why Brad Pitt, Penélope Cruz and Javier Bardem would do this movie is beyond me.


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