Starring: Rachel McAdams, Abby Ryder Fortson, Elle Graham, Benny Safdie, Kathy Bates
OUR RATING: ★★★★☆
Story:
Comedy drama written and directed by Kelly Fremon Craig. Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret (2023) centers on 11-year-old Margaret (Abby Ryder Fortson), who is uprooted from her life in New York City for the suburbs of New Jersey, going through the messy and tumultuous throes of puberty with new friends in a new school. She relies on her mother, Barbara (Rachel McAdams), who is also struggling to adjust to life outside the big city, and her adoring grandmother, Sylvia (Kathy Bates), who isn’t happy they moved away and likes to remind them every chance she gets.
Best Quotes
Margaret Simon: Oh, you made this?
Sylvia Simon: From scratch. It’s cashmere. I did everything, but shave the goat.
Sylvia Simon: You’re moving.
Herb Simon: Really, Mom?
Margaret Simon: What?
Barbara Simon: Sylvia, you promised.
Margaret Simon: We’re moving?
Sylvia Simon: She saw the boxes. She was putting it together.
Barbara Simon: I don’t think she was.
Margaret Simon: So, we’re moving?!
Margaret Simon: We’re leaving New York?
Herb Simon: Barely leaving New York. It’s just on the other side of the river.
Margaret Simon: But we’re happy here. We don’t need to move.
Herb Simon: No, we don’t need to move, but we want to move. Right?
Margaret Simon: I don’t.
Sylvia Simon: [to Margaret] Oh, my darling. I’m never going to see you again.
Herb Simon: Oh, Jesus. So dramatic all the time.
Margaret Simon: Are you there, God? It’s me Margaret Simon. I just wanted… Well. First, I’ve heard a lot of great things about you. I don’t want to move. I’ve never lived anywhere but the city, and I don’t want to do this. Please, I’m begging you. Just please, just stop this move from happening. If you can’t do that, just please don’t let New Jersey be too horrible.
Nancy Wheeler: [to Margaret] You’re still flat. Well, I’m already growing. See? I’m going to have a pretty big chest. You know, coming from New York, I thought you’d be a lot more grown up.
Nancy Wheeler: Anyways, listen, Margaret. I’ve decided I want you to join my secret club. There’s three of us and I’m letting in one more. But you can’t wear socks, or else the others might not want you.
Barbara Simon: [to Margaret, referring to school] Are you ready for your first day? How you feeling? It’s going to be great, right?
Herb Simon: And if it’s not great, first days don’t count anyways.
Herb Simon: I just got a new power mower, and I’m really excited for the grass to grow.
'I hate feeling self-conscious trying not to feel self-conscious, because then you only feel more self-conscious.' - Mr. Benedict (Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret) Share on X
Mr. Benedict: I love that I’m finally getting to be a teacher for the first time. I hate feeling self-conscious trying not to feel self-conscious, because then you only feel more self-conscious, and then you’re blabbing in front of a whole bunch of kids.
Barbara Simon: And how are you?
Sylvia Simon: Oh, fine. I read that when you don’t have any loved ones around your life expectancy drops drastically. But, you know, I’ve had a good run.
Nancy Wheeler: If you want to be in the club, then you have to wear a bra.
Margaret Simon: I want to get a bra.
Barbara Simon: Oh. Do you think you need one?
Margaret Simon: I guess I just don’t like those holidays because I don’t celebrate any of them. My dad is Jewish, and my mom’s Christian, so instead of picking which religion I am, they just decided that I wouldn’t have one and I can choose when I grow up.
'I cannot wait to take it off.' - Margaret Simon, 'Yeah. Welcome to womanhood.' - Barbara Simon (Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret) Share on X
Barbara Simon: [referring to her parents] They told me it would be very hard for them to have a Jewish son-in-law. And that if I wanted to marry him, that was my business, but I wouldn’t be their daughter anymore.
Margaret Simon: But you are their daughter.
Barbara Simon: I guess, what I mean is that, they just didn’t want me in their life anymore. So, I’m not.
Margaret Simon: [praying] Oh, also, I’m getting a bra today. I’d like something to put in it, please.
Barbara Simon: We’re looking for a bra for my daughter.
Department Store Sales Lady: Well, we don’t have many that small.
Department Store Sales Lady: [after measuring Margaret’s bra size] Barely a twenty-eight. Not even a double A. Your best bet is going to be to go with one of these Gro-Bras here. So one day, when you do grow, it’ll grow with you.
'I think that maybe the truth is there's nobody up there. There's nobody listening. There's only just me.' - Margaret Simon (Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret) Share on X
Barbara Simon: [as Margaret tries on the bra] How does that feel?
Margaret Simon: I cannot wait to take it off.
Barbara Simon: Yeah. Welcome to womanhood.
Herb Simon: You ever been kissed in the suburbs?
Barbara Simon: No, sir.
Nancy Wheeler: If you want to get out of those small bras, you’re going to have to do the same exercise and technique I do.
Margaret Simon: There’s an exercise?
Nancy Wheeler: Of course there is. You hold your arms out like this, and you say, “I must. I must. I must increase my bust. I must. I must. I must increase my bust!”
Janie Loomis: Does that really work?
Nancy Wheeler: I’m living proof.
Margaret Simon: You know, maybe I will do my school project on religion. I think it’s finally time for me to decide what to be, God. You wouldn’t mind, would you? I’ll tell you all about it. And I promise I won’t make any decisions without you first.
Sylvia Simon: There’s the rabbi. He’s the best in the city. Two hours, in and out, bing, bang, boom.
'It gets tiring trying so hard all the time, doesn't it?' - Barbara Simon (Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret) Share on X
Margaret Simon: You said that I can choose my own religion when I grow up.
Barbara Simon: Yeah, when you grow up. When you’re an adult.
Margaret Simon: I’m almost twelve. That’s almost an adult.
Barbara Simon: Honey, no.
Herb Simon: [referring to Margaret] Well, she’ll go to a couple of endless services, and then, she’ll realize how lucky she was we never made her go. Know what got me off going to temple?
Barbara Simon: What?
Herb Simon: Going to temple. You don’t understand a word they’re saying. And you sit there for a long time.
Gretchen Potter: [referring to the male anatomy in the medical book] It looks like a thumb.
Janie Loomis: It’s so saggy.
Gretchen Potter: It’s a wobbly blob.
Janie Loomis: I never want to see anyone naked, or have anyone see me naked. It’s just gross.
Nancy Wheeler: Come on. What about when you get married?
Janie Loomis: Especially then.
Gretchen Potter: [as they’re looking at the model in the magazine] Look how round they are. Mine just look like little wizard hats.
Gretchen Potter: [referring to the model in the magazine] Do you think any of us will look like that when we’re nineteen?
Girls: We must. We must. We must increase our bust!
Margaret Simon: [after her first kiss with Philip Leroy] I know I shouldn’t be enjoying this, God, but it’s just too good.
Margaret Simon: If only you could give me a hint, God. I’m more confused than ever. Which religion should I be? Sometimes I just wish I’d been born one way or the other.
Mrs. Webster: I am here to speak to you today about your changing bodies.
Nancy Wheeler: [to the others] Told you this was the big sex movie.
Documentary Narrator: [the students watch the info. film] The blood is released through the v***na. That’s menstruation.
Gretchen Potter: Who do you think will get it first?
Nancy Wheeler: Who do you think will get it last?
Margaret Simon: I’d die if I didn’t get it before I was sixteen.
Barbara Simon: Honey, you will get it exactly when you’re supposed to get it.
Nancy Wheeler: I just don’t really understand how you got it first when I have way more than you.
Gretchen Potter: Well, that doesn’t mean anything.
Nancy Wheeler: Yes, it does, Gretchen.
Gretchen Potter: My sister said that it kind of has a smell. But I haven’t noticed that yet.
Nancy Wheeler: A smell? Like what?
Gretchen Potter: She said it kind of smells like the monkey bars.
Nancy Wheeler: The monkey bars? Ugh.
Gretchen Potter: Yeah.
Janie Loomis: I used to love the monkey bars.
Margaret Simon: But do you feel older now? Like more mature?
Gretchen Potter: Oh, yeah. I don’t know how to explain it, and you won’t understand it till you get it, but I feel like everything’s changed.
Margaret Simon: [praying] Are you there, God? It’s me, Margaret. I’ve never been so jealous my entire life, and I hate myself for being jealous. Just please, please just let me grow, and let me get my period. Let me just be normal and regular like everybody else. Just please, please, please, please, please, please, please! Amen.
Margaret Simon: [referring to the cashier, as they’re going to buy sanitary pads] Please, God, let it be a lady.
Philip Leroy: [to Margaret] I got you something. It’s a pinch to grow an inch. And you know where you need that inch.
Laura Danker: You think I don’t know that all of you make fun of me like it’s some kind of game?
Margaret Simon: It’s not me.
Laura Danker: Do you think I want to be the biggest kid in the class? How would you feel if you were to wear a bra in fourth grade and everybody called you names just because of how you looked?
Margaret Simon: I don’t know.
Margaret Simon: I’m the worst person who ever lived, God. I picked on Laura Danker just because I felt mean. I don’t want to be like Nancy. I don’t even know if I want to be friends with her anymore. I’ve been looking for you, God. I looked for you in Temple. I looked for you in Church. I didn’t feel you at all. Why? Why, God? Why do I only feel you when I’m alone?
Barbara Simon: [referring to her parents coming to visit] But what if this means they’ve changed?
Herb Simon: And if they haven’t?
Barbara Simon: They’re my parents. The only ones I got.
Herb Simon: They are your parents.
Herb Simon: [referring to Barbara’s parents] I used up all my small talk in the car. Do they like sports? TV shows?
Barbara Simon: Game shows. They used to watch game shows.
Sylvia Simon: Oh. This is Morris Binamin.
Morris Binamin: Rhymes with cinnamon.
Paul Hutchins: [to Margaret] Do you go to Sunday school? Or, have you ever thought about it?
Sylvia Simon: Nope. Never. Not once.
Barbara Simon: Margaret is nothing! Margaret is not Jewish or Christian. She is no religion until she decides.
Margaret Simon: I don’t care anymore. It’s all just so stupid, religion! Just stop fighting! I don’t want a religion. I don’t care. I don’t care! I don’t even believe in God!
Margaret Simon: [from her school assignment] “Dear Mr. Benedict, what I learned about religion is that it makes people fight. That every religion says the same thing. If you pray to God, he’ll listen to you, and help you, and make things better. But I’ve prayed, and prayed, and everything just gets worse. I don’t know anymore, but I think that maybe the truth is there’s nobody up there. There’s nobody listening. There’s only just me. Sincerely, Margaret Simon.”
Margaret Simon: Thanks, Mr. Benedict. You’re a really good teacher.
Mr. Benedict: Well, I wouldn’t say all that. You know, still trying to iron out some of the kinks.
Margaret Simon: No, you were really good.
Mr. Benedict: I’m glad you felt that way.
Margaret Simon: I got it. I got my period.
Barbara Simon: What?
Margaret Simon: I got it, right?
Barbara Simon: Yeah!
Barbara Simon: I can’t believe this is happening to you.
Margaret Simon: I don’t believe it either.
Barbara Simon: You’re a woman!
Margaret Simon: I’m a woman!
Margaret Simon: Are you still there, God? It’s me, Margaret. Thanks. Thanks an awful lot.
Trailer: