Best Quotes from Hotel Transylvania Movies

Our list of the best quotes from Hotel Transylvania movies, the animated monster comedy which follows Count Dracula, the owner of Hotel Transylvania, a refuge for the world’s monsters to get away and take a rest from human civilization, his daughter Mavis, and his monster pals.

'Suffer, suffer, scream in pain. Blood is spilling from your brain. Zombies gnaw you like a plum, piercing cries and you succumb. Suffer, suffer, scream in pain. You will never breathe again.' - Dracula Click To Tweet

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1. Hotel Transylvania (2012)

We follow Jonathan (Andy Samberg), a human who accidentally stumbles upon the hotel and falls in love with Dracula’s (Adam Sandler) teenage daughter, Mavis (Selena Gomez), despite Dracula’s attempts to keep Jonathan away from his daughter.

'Children need to discover things for themselves.' - Dracula (Hotel Transylvania) Click To Tweet

Suit of Armor: There is a clogged toilet in room 348.
Dracula: [as Bigfoot growls] lt’s okay. We all get stomach aches, Mr. Bigfoot.

Dracula: [moviequotesandmore.com] Now, now, is that any way to behave? This is a hotel, not a cemetery.

Murray: [holding Frankenstein’s head] I love this guy. He always bringing it full tilt. You’re looking skinny too. Now that you’re just a head.

Dracula: These are recent human images our surveillance has uncovered. They are getting to fatter so as to overpower us. And they are wearing less clothing, allowing more movement
to strangle us, or cut open our heads, and put candy in them. But they will never find us here. Evil villain, you will never win!

Dracula: [moviequotesandmore.com] You’re old enough to drive a hearse now. You’re old enough to make your own choices.

Eunice: Excuse me. Drac! Have you lost it? Letting your own daughter out there with those horrible humans you always tell us about? That’s why you built this place. They hate us. They’re vicious. And they’re very loud!

Wanda: [to Mavis] Bring warm clothes and a sword.
Griffin: And look out for pitchforks.
Murray: Don’t you let anyone scoop your brains out either.
Wayne: Maybe stay in the shadows. It’s more fun to just observe, from under a house.
Frankenstein: Guys, guys. She can handle it. She’s a Dracula, for Pete’s sake. But seriously, watch out for fire. Fire bad.

Shrunken Head: [moviequotesandmore.com] What did you do?
Dracula: What I had to. She’ll thank me one day.
Shrunken Head: Yeah, that’s what the guy who shrunk my head said.

Dracula: A human! Who are you? And how did you find this place?
Jonathan: Oh, I’m Jonathan. And I was just mountain climbing with some dudes, and heard this story about a spooky forest. And who’s not going to go into a spooky forest, right? So then I see these goofy looking dudes on fire, and I just kind of followed them to this like amazing castle.
Dracula: How many of you are there?
Jonathan: Just me. I like to hit it alone. You meet so many awesome people in the youth hostels. Hey, speaking of awesome, that cape thing is killing it!

Gremlin Lady: Excuse me. One of your piranhas in the lake is very rude. He ate my sister-in-law.

Jonathan: Check it out. I’m a Frankenhomie!

Mavis: Who is that?
Dracula: Who is what? Oh, that. That is nobody.
Mavis: Seriously, dad?
Jonathan: Dad?
Mavis: Yeah. I know, Dracula’s daughter. Everyone freaks out at first.
Jonathan: Dracula?!

Jonathan: [moviequotesandmore.com] Please don’t kill me. I’m so young! I have so many places I want to see. I’ve got tickets to six Dave Matthews Band concerts.

Jonathan: Wait. Aren’t you going to suck my blood?
Dracula: Classic human paranoia. Human blood is so fatty, and you never know where it’s been.
Jonathan: So, Dracula doesn’t drink blood?
Dracula: No, I use a blood substitute. Either Near Blood, or Blood Beaters. You can’t tell the difference.

Jonathan: So, wow, you’re like the real Count Dracula. Like, “I’m Dracula. Bleh, bleh-bleh!”
Dracula: l’ve never said that in my life. “Bleh, bleh-bleh.” I don’t know where that comes from.

Dracula: What is this place? It’s a place I built for all those monsters out there, lurking in the shadows, hiding from the persecution of humankind. A place for them and their families to come to and be themselves. A place void of torches, pitchforks, angry mobs! A place of peace, relaxation, and tranquility.
Jonathan: Cool. So, it’s like a hotel for monsters?
Dracula: Yes, exactly. A hotel for monsters. Way to sum it up.

Dracula: [moviequotesandmore.com] Can Frankenstein sign my costume? Can I meet the Invisible Man? Hey, if I stuck my hand in the lnvisible Man’s mouth, would it disappear?

Jonathan: So, wait, you didn’t have any clothes on when you were a bat? Or were they bat-sized?

Mavis: You’re my age?
Jonathan: Sure. Well, how old are you?
Mavis: A hundred and eighteen.
Jonathan: One hundred and…
[Dracual elbows him]
Jonathan: Yeah, I’m one-twenty-one.
Mavis: Really?

Suit of Armor: [referring to Jonathan] Boy, that kid smelled.

Jonathan: Is that real, about the garlic thing?
Dracula: Yes, I cannot have it. My throat swells.
Jonathan: Huh. Wooden stake to the heart?
Dracula: Yeah, well, who wouldn’t that kill?

Jonathan: [moviequotesandmore.com] Are these monsters going to kill me?
Dracula: Not as long as they think you’re a monster.
Jonathan: Huh? That’s kind of racist.

Mavis: He’s your cousin, Johnnystein.
Dracula: Yes, yes, yes.
Frankenstein: I don’t have no cousin.
Dracula: No, no. Yyou do. He’s your sixth cousin, three times removed.
Jonathan: On your right arm’s side.

Dracula: Frank, if your arm could talk, he would tell you that the original owner of your arm had a brother.
Jonathan: Who married a woman.
Dracula: Who was…
Jonathan: For strangling a pig!
Frankenstein: I have pig-strangling blood in my arm? That’s kind of cool.

Frankenstein: [moviequotesandmore.com] Let me get a bubonic moose nose omelet with cockroach paste and mouse jelly. Oh, and with egg whites.

Dracula: Look, love droppings, I brought you a bagel with your favorite, scream cheese.
Mavis: Holy rabies. Thanks, dad. Johnny, try some scream cheese, it’s awesome.
Jonathan: Oh, cool. But I’m scream cheese intolerant. So, polite pass.

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Dracula: You’ll ruin my hotel if they find out.
Jonathan: Well, maybe you’re just jealous that people are finally having fun at this place.
Dracula: Oh, that? That was not fun. Everyone running, jumping, swimming with no order. That was the opposite of fun.
Jonathan: Do you even know what fun is?
Dracula: I invented fun!
Jonathan: Boy, the wrong people get to be immortal.

Dracula: Look at me. You remember nothing of this encounter. You have no memory of this place, or the monsters you met. Now go and never return.
Jonathan: Wait, never return to the hotel?
Dracula: What? You were supposed to forget the hotel. I just used my powers to erase your memory. I looked straight into your eyes.
Jonathan: Huh. Well, maybe it’s the contact lenses.
Dracula: The what?
Jonathan: These little plasticky doodads that help me see better. Here, let me just try and get them out real quick.
Dracula: Oh, that is the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen!

Dracula: Listen to me. You are never to return here. You are to stay away, and never tell humans about this place. Or I will track you down, and suck every ounce of blood from your body until you look like a deflated whoopee cushion!

Jonathan: I just went to a music festival there.
Mavis: A human music festival?
Jonathan: I believe so.
Mavis: So, did they all bite your toes, and shove garlic bread in your face?
Jonathan: No. Well, one dude took a bigger bite out of my energy bar than I expected. But I blame that on the heat.

Frankenstein: And it was so nice seeing Mavis laughing and hitting it off with him.
Dracula: Who’s hitting what off? Please. Mavis could never be with someone of his kind.
Frankenstein: I’m sorry? His kind? You’re saying our kind’s not good enough for you, “Your Lordship”?
Dracula: No, no, no! Frank, I didn’t… I meant that she wouldn’t be into someone with such red, curly hair.
Griffin: What’s wrong with red, curly hair?
Dracula: Why are you getting upset?
Griffin: I have red curly hair!
Dracula: Well, how was I supposed to know that?

Quasimodo: When you bump with the hump, you land on your rump!

Jonathan: Before you kill me, can I please talk to my backpack one more time? I don’t want to leave anything unresolved.

Quasimodo: Bonjour, monsieur Dracula!
Dracula: Shut your hump hole.

Jonathan: That guy’s crazy! Trying to eat me. That’s only happened to me one other time. This weird dude at a slipknot concert.

Dracula: You know, you’re not the smoothest Frankenstein, but you’d make a great vampire.
Jonathan: For real? Because I think I kind of got your hypno-eyes down.

Dracula: [after he sees Mavis and Jonathan kissing] How could you? After I shared my pain with you?

Mavis: Dad, I’m allowed to do things. I’m not eighty-three anymore. I’m allowed to like people, or go see the world again.

Martha: [as Dracula reads from his late wife’s book for Mavis] Two lonely bats crashed in the night. They felt a Zing. Love at first sight. They knew right then they would be husband and wife. For a Zing only happens once in your life. Your Zing will come, my love. Cherish it. Love, Mommy.

Dracula: I need you to help me find Johnny.
Wayne: The human? He could’ve killed us!
Murray: He touched my guitar!
Griffin: He put his hand in my mouth to see if it would disappear.
Gremlin Lady: He let me eat his scooter!

Dracula: I know I lied. I was wrong. But you have to believe this. Johnny wasn’t a bad guy. The truth is, I don’t even know if humans are bad anymore. Frank, come on, buddy. You understand.
Eunice: He’s not talking to you. First you tell us humans are bad, now they’re good. What else? Up is down, cold is hot, gremlins don’t smell.
Gremlin Man: Hey!

Wayne: My sniffing tracking days are way behind me. Do you know how many diapers I’ve changed? How many number twos have destroyed this thing?

Wayne: [after eating all the sheep] What? Now there’s no sheep in the road. Let’s go.
Murray: That was pretty sick, man.
Wayne: You eat lamb chops, it’s the same thing.

Murray: The only way they’d know the real us is if we show the real us.

Frankenstein: We haven’t scared people in centuries. I don’t even think I have it in me anymore.
[tries to growl]
Frankenstein: I got nothing. I really got nothing.

Dracula: [as he sees a Twilight movie] This is how we’re represented. Unbelievable.

Jonathan: [sees Dracula in his bat against the plane window] Huh? Dracula. I can’t understand you.
Dracula: [unable to hear Jonathan] What? My hand’s in a tan shoe?
Jonathan: [unable to hear Dracula] What? Japan’s eating lamb stew?

Dracula: My dear boy, I have made a terrible mistake. I was trying to keep my baby to myself, because I knew I would always protect her. But I reaIize now, children need to discover things for themselves. They’ll stumble and fall, laugh and cry, but such is life. The truth is, you and Mavis are meant to be. You Zinged. If she must give her trust to someone else, I’m thankful that it is you, Jonathan. I hope you can hear me, and forgive me.

Mavis: Why are you back?
Jonathan: Because you’re my Zing, Mavis.
Mavis: I’m your Zing? But you told me you hate monsters.
Jonathan: Yeah. Well, I was afraid your dad was going to suck all the blood out of my body if I didn’t say that.
Dracula: I wouldn’t have. No, he’s right, I would have done that.

Dracula: I was wrong, Devil-chops.
Mavis: Do you really mean it, dad?
Dracula: Go make your own paradise.

Gremlin Lady: I didn’t do that.

2. Hotel Transylvania 2 (2015)

The story centers on Mavis and Jonathan, who now have a young son named Dennis, whose lack of any vampire abilities worries both Mavis and Dracula for different reasons. When Mavis and Johnny travel to Johnny’s hometown in California, Dracula decides to call on his friends to help him make Dennis a vampire, much to Mavis’s dismay.

'You can't just make somebody something they're not.' - Mavis (Hotel Transylvania 2) Click To Tweet

Murray: You got a date?
Griffin: Yeah. She’s invisible. That’s why you can’t see her.
Frankenstein: Oh, right. This is the one from “Canada”?

Mavis: [referring to Jonathan] So, you’re really okay with him not being a monster?
Dracula: Human, monster, unicorn, as long as you’re happy.

Dracula: Oh, honey, look at those fluffy clouds. Remember what we played when you were little? Hide and Go Seek Sharp Objects?

Mavis: [moviequotesandmore.com] Can you get me some ice cream with anchovies?
Dracula: No, no, no. You mustn’t give in to your cravings. It’s not good for the baby. You need to increase your spider intake, so he’ll be able to climb ceilings properly. And eat lots of sheep bile.
Mavis: I love you, dad, but we don’t even know if the kid’s going to be a vampire. I’d be thrilled if the baby’s humany, just like Johnny.
Dracula: Humany. With thousands of years of Dracula genes. Not going to happen.
Mavis: As long as the baby’s healthy.
Dracula: Of course. A healthy little vampire.
Mavis: Or human.
Dracula: Yes, a human who can fly as a bat.

Grandma Linda: [referring to Dennis] Are we sure he’s a vampire? I mean, not that it’s a bad thing, but shouldn’t he have fangs, and that pasty skin you guys have?

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Eunice: Baby-proofing a guillotine? So you cut your finger off. It’s part of the fun.
Dracula: [referring to Mavis] She made me baby-proof the whole hotel. Someone’s overprotective.

Dennis: [saying his first words] Bleh, bleh-bleh.
Dracula: I don’t say, “Bleh, bleh-bleh.”
Mavis: We didn’t say you did.
Dracula: Then where did he get that?
Dennis: Bleh, bleh-bleh.
Mavis: Well, maybe sometimes you say it.
Dracula: I only say it when I say I don’t say it!

Dracula: So, Drac, I wanted to go through some thoughts I had, as your new human relations coordinating co-assistant.
Jonathan: Sure. It’s a real job. Not a cheap excuse to keep Mavis happy, so you never leave here.

Dracula: Hello, my little devil. Did you have sweet nightmares?
Dennis: Uh-huh. I dreamed that I saw a stegosaurus.
Dracula: Oh. And were you drinking his blood?
Dennis: No.
Dracula: Just throwing it out there.

Mavis: Twinkle, twinkle, little star, how I wonder…
Dennis: Mommy, I’m too old for lullabies.
Dracula: What? That’s not how that one goes.
Mavis: This is the way most people sing it.
Dracula: Most people? What’s wrong with, “Suffer, suffer, scream in pain. Blood is spilling from your brain.”
Mavis: Daddy.
Dracula: Come on. You know how I sang it to you. “Zombies gnaw you like a plum, piercing cries and you succumb. Suffer, suffer, scream in pain. You will never breathe again.

Mavis: I’m sorry, but you can’t just make somebody something they’re not.

Dracula: [referring to Dennis] He is a monster! He’s just a late fanger.
Shrunken Head: Mm-hmm. And I could be a hand model.

Shrunken Head: If he’s not a vampire by his birthday, it ain’t happening.
Dracula: Oh, it ain’t ain’t happening, baby. All he needs is time with his vampa.
Frankenstein: Vampa?
Dracula: Vampire grandpa. Come on, man. That’s obvious.

Dracula: You kids go to California, and see if it’s the right place to raise Denisovich.
Mavis: And you remember how to video chat?
Dracula: Yes, yes. With the phone, and the buttons, and the agony.

Mavis: Thanks for being so understanding, dad. I know you’ll keep him safe.
Dracula: Of course, Mavey. Stake my heart and hope to die.

Dracula: How do you click in the stupid car seat?
Frankenstein: You got to cut those nails, man.
Wayne: We just strap our kids down with duct tape.

Dracula: We’re not everybody. We’re scary monsters. Remember?
Griffin: Hey, what are you putting in?
Dracula: It’s an audio book. Bigfoot’s life story. He reads it himself.

Wayne: We don’t need to kill anymore. We have Pop-Tarts.

Mavis: Johnny, have you tried this Slurpée?
Jonathan: Not that quickly, hon.
Mavis: It comes in forty-eight flavors. We have to try them all!
Jonathan: I don’t know if we have time.
Mavis: Why? This place is open all night. Right, sir?
Kal: Yes.

Tourist Driver: Excuse us. Do you know where someone can get a bite around here?
Tourist Passenger: Did you seriously just ask a vampire where to get a bite?

Jonathan: That’s my girlfriend, suckers.
Mavis: Your wife, Johnny. My wife. Even better.

Kid: That was sick, lady. Where did you learn how to do that stuff?
Mavis: Transylvania.
Kid: That’s cool. I have a cousin from Pennsylvania.

Mavis: I mean, I grew up knowing nothing living inside that hotel. And you learned about everything growing up in Santa Claus.
Jonathan: Santa Cruz.

Mavis: Maybe if Dennis grows up away from Transylvania, he won’t be so freaky. Like me.
Jonathan: Are you nuts? Mavis, you’re a blast. You’re so full of life, and curious about everything. If Dennis grows up to be just like you, I’ll be the luckiest dad in the world.

Mavis: Maybe you’ve let humans into your hotel, dad. But I don’t think you’ve let them into your heart.

Dracula: Listen to me. My dad cannot know you’re a human. Or any of your family.
Jonathan: What? But, Drac, I’m proud that we’re…
Dracula: Or he’ll steal your family’s souls, and eat your backpack!

Dracula: This is your vampire costume? What are you, nuts?
Jonathan: I ordered it online. It was the only place that delivered overnight.
Dracula: You look like you got a baboon’s butt on your head.

Dracula: Talk like a vampire.
Jonathan: My name is Count Jonafang. I am a vampire.
Dracula: Okay, vampires don’t go around saying, “I am a vampire.”
Jonathan: Sorry. I am Count Jonafang. Bleh, bleh-bleh.
Dracula: Are you kidding me?
Jonathan: I’m sorry. I’m nervous!

Jonathan: Drac, this is Brandon, AKA Kakie. We got him for Dennis.
Kakie: Hey, man.
Dracula: Nauseated to meet you.

Vlad: [referring to Linda and Mike] These two smell funny.
Grandma Linda: Oh, you’re European. It’s called deodorant.
Grandpa Mike: Nothing like insulting an entire continent, Linda.

Frankenstein: Hey, Count! How goes it? Frankenstein. Actually, I’m technically Frankenstein’s monster. Frankenstein, he’s the doctor who…
Vlad: Would love to hear more. Call my people.

Frankenstein: This is Murray.
Murray: Please don’t kill me! I mean, yoh, V! What’s up?
Vlad: Talking toilet paper. Well, that’s a new one.

Jonathan: I am Count Jonafang. Bleh, bleh, black sheep. Have you any wool?
Vlad: What’s that thing on your head? Looks like my grandmother’s boobies.

Candle Cake Monster: I want all the cake. Sharing is for cowards!

Grandma Linda: I think Dennis just wants to be normal.
Mavis: Can we stop using the word “normal”?
Dracula: Where we live now, he’s normal.
Mavis: He is who he is. And you can’t change him, dad!

Vlad: You’re a fool!
Dracula: Your great-grandson is the sweetest, kindest, most special boy I’ve ever met. And if you can’t give him the love he deserves because he’s half-human, then you’re the fool.

Dennis: I have to move away, Winnie. To California. My mommy thinks I’m not happy here because I don’t have hair on my face like you. I’m sorry I’m not a monster.
Winnie: No, you are perfect. You’re the nicest boy I know. And I have three hundred brothers!

Mavis: [referring to Dennis] He’s not in the room.
Wayne: He’s not by the pool.
Frankenstein: [as he drinks the pot of soup] He’s not in this pot of soup.

Dennis: Are you okay, Winnie?
Winnie: Yes, my Zing.

Dennis: Papa Drac, I’m a vampire, and a superhero. Am I cool now?
Dracula: Now? Dennis, you were always cool. Human, vampire, unicorn, you’re perfect no matter what.

Vlad: All this pressure about when the boy’s fangs were coming out. Who cares? Mine came out years ago! Look.
Dracula: [as Vlad takes his teeth out] Okay, dad, put them back in before we all barf.

3. Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation (2018)

We follow Dracula as he finds love with ship captain Ericka (Kathryn Hahn) while on a vacation on a cruise liner with his family and friends. However, Mavis discovers that Ericka is actually a descendant of monster hunter Van Helsing (Jim Gaffigan), Dracula’s arch-enemy.

'Family is everything. You have to honor the past. But we make our own future.' - Dracula (Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation) Click To Tweet

Murray: Man, I hate wearing disguises. These heels are killing me.
Dracula: Okay, take it down a notch. We don’t want to alarm the humans.

Van Helsing: [moviequotesandmore.com] You can’t run from me, Prince of Darkness! I will hunt you for all eternity! I swear I will never rest until I destroy you. And every other monster, if it’s the last thing I ever do!
Dracula: Boy, that guy is annoying.

Mavis: It doesn’t matter where you come from, or how different you are. A Zing only happens once in your life, and you have to cherish it.

Murray: She got stitches in all the right places.
Wayne: Okay, there’s no way that is related to you, Frank.
Frankenstein: No, she’s my right arm’s cousin.

Frankenlady: Frank wanted me to meet you. We’re arm cousins, twice removed.
Dracula: Of course. I’d recognize that bicep anywhere.

Dracula: [moviequotesandmore.com] I’m far too busy. I have Mavis and Dennis and the hotel, and bleh, bleh-bleh.
Frankenstein: Did you guys hear that? He actually said, “Bleh, bleh-bleh.”
Dracula: I don’t say, “Bleh, bleh-bleh!”

See more Hotel Transylvania 3 Quotes

Phone Voice: What can I help you with, Lord of Darkness?
Dracula: I’m looking for a Zing.
Phone Voice: Okay. Changing phone ring.
Dracula: No, no. I’m looking for a date.
Phone Voice: The date is Friday, July 13th.
Dracula: No, no, no. I want to meet someone.
Phone Voice: Understood, you want to eat dim sum!
Dracula: Are you kidding me right now?! Don’t you get it? I want to go on a date! I’m lonely.
Phone Voice: I understand. You want bologna!

Gremlin Stewardess: Ladies and gentlemen, please direct your attention to the front of the cabin. For your safety, please unbuckle your seat belts.

Dracula: Why are we on a plane? We can fly, you know!

Frankenstein: Maybe you’ll find your own fireworks on the cruise, huh?
Dracula: It’s not the Love Boat, Frank.

Mavis: [after Dracula’s Zinged with Ericka] Oh, no! He’s having a heart attack!
Murray: Drac? Not likely.
Wayne: Yeah, the only heart attack that can hurt him is with a wooden stake.

Ericka: For so long, monsters were hiding, living in the shadows. But not anymore! You’ve stood up and waved your hand, or claw, or tentacle, and said, “We’re here, we’re hairy, and it is our right to be scary!”

Ericka: [as Dracula speaks gibberish] Oh, such a romantic language. You know, there’s just something about an accent that makes a man sound so intelligent.

Ericka: You were so right, Great-Grandfather. Monsters are disgusting!
Van Helsing: They’re animals!

Dracula: Mavis needs me. She depends on me. I need to be home with my family.
Griffin: Hey, Murray here may be from Egypt, but you’re the one in “de Nile”. You guys get that?

Ericka: Aw, what a cute family. What? No, it’s not. Dracula bad! Dracula bad!

Dracula: [to Ericka] Your delicious neck wrappings are in a nice coffin. Would you like to see my parts?

Eunice: Frank, would you rub some moonscreen on my back, before I get burned?

Dracula: There must have been garlic in the guacamole.
Ericka: Oh, no. Isn’t that deadly for you?
Dracula: No, no, no. It’s just that I’m garlic intolerant.
[involuntarily breaks wind]
Dracula: Was that you?

Dracula: Family is everything. You have to honor the past. But we make our own future.

Van Helsing: You’ve been sneaking around my back trying to kill Dracula again, haven’t you?
Ericka: So what if I have? I am a grown woman! I have the right to kill whoever I want.

Eunice: [to Frankenstein] Oh, no, you don’t. Last time you gambled, you lost an arm and a leg. Literally!

Ericka: You saved my life.
Dracula: Of course. Why wouldn’t I?
Ericka: I just can’t believe you would do that for a human.
Dracula: Humans, monsters, what’s the difference?

Mavis: I can’t believe my dad Zinged with someone who’s trying to kill him.
Jonathan: Yeah, the Zing makes you do crazy things.

Jonathan: What’s most important to understand is that love is an infinite enigma that is beyond our understanding. You and I were two halves, a world apart. But then we followed the strands of destiny and were brought together. And our halves made one whole.
Mavis: But what if she and he…
Jonathan: You must release all the negativity and look within. Your bond is unbreakable.

Dennis: Woh, you sounded pretty smart, dad.
Jonathan: Oh, that? Yeah, it was just the philosophy of Sifu Sing from my favorite TV show when I was a kid Kung Fu Shaolin Monk Master.

Mavis: Go talk to her.
Dracula: I can’t. You heard what she said, she could never be with someone like me.
Mavis: No, dad. You’re just a half, and you have to follow your destiny to find an infinite whole.
Dracula: You sound like Johnny.
Mavis: Point is, you can’t deny a Zing. Monster, human, unicorn. It doesn’t matter. So go to her! Now!

Van Helsing: I know you recognize me, your greatest rival.
Dracula: Hmm. Oh, right. You own that Holiday Inn down by the airport.
Van Helsing: No! It is I, Abraham Van Helsing.
Dracula: Van Helsing? After all these years? You look awful.
Van Helsing: Always with the quick insults.

Ericka: I’m so sorry, Drac. I was trying to kill you this whole time, but then I realized how wrong I was. How wrong all of this is. And then I Zinged.
Van Helsing: Zing? What’s a Zing?
Ericka: It’s a monster thing. You wouldn’t understand.
Dracula: It’s like true love.
Van Helsing: Love?!

Murray: You got to be greater than the haters.

Van Helsing: Why, after everything, would you save my life?
Dracula: Because, basically we are all the same. Claws, or hands, two eyes, or three eyes.
Witch: Green skin.
Skeleton: No skin.

Van Helsing: For decades I have hunted your kind, persecuted you. The only thing I can do to make it up to you is give you a thirty percent refund.
Monster: Preposterous!
Van Helsing: Oh, alright. Full refund.

Griffin: Wayne, Wanda. What happened to you guys?
Crystal: Yeah, we, like hardly saw you on the cruise.
Wayne: Yeah, I know. We got tranquilized and spent most of the trip locked in a closet.
Wanda: We’re going to book it again for the holidays.

Dracula: It’s just, I wanted to make sure nobody would bother us.
Ericka: Oh! Why? Are you going to suck-a my blood? Bleh, bleh-bleh.
Dracula: No. I was going to ask you if you would marry me.

4. Hotel Transylvania 4: Transformania (2022)

After Van Helsing’s mysterious new invention transforms Dracula and his monster pals into humans, and Jonathan into a monster, with their new mismatched bodies, Dracula and the pack must find a way to switch themselves back before their transformations become permanent.

'If you only see the worst in things, you'll miss the best part.' - Jonathan (Hotel Transylvania 4: Transformania) Click To Tweet

Mavis: Dad, Johnny did all of this for you. He was trying to make this day special.
Dracula: Oh, you mean by ruining my carefully planned party. Wow, thank you, dear son-in-law.
Mavis: What was that?
Dracula: Oh, hey. Nothing, honeybat.

Mavis: Dad, I know you and Johnny don’t always see eye to eye, but I love him, and I wouldn’t change a thing.
Dracula: Really? You sure you wouldn’t make just a few teensy changes?
Dracula: [as he cleans up a frozen Johnny] Better, no?
Mavis: No! He’s perfect just the way he is.
Dracula: Okay. Okay. Whatever you say, honeybat. Now, let’s continue this special day, because it’s going to get even more specialier.

Ericka: You ready for your big speech, honeyfangs?
Dracula: Yes, I think so. But Johnny is giving me the greatest headache of my entire existence right now, like a giant wooden stake right through my brain!
Ericka: Oh, you know Johnny. He just gets a little carried away.
Dracula: Yes, exactly. And ruins everything. That’s the problem.

Ericka: [moviequotesandmore.com] Well, you are just all sorts of wonderful, aren’t you?
Dracula: Well, it’s not for nothing that they call me Count Wonderful.
Ericka: Oh. Do they?
Dracula: And also Dark Prince of Loveliness. Lord of Smoochy Time.

Jonathan: I guess I just never got the feeling that he really thought of me as, you know, part of the family.
Mavis: What are you talking about? Of course you’re part of the family.
Jonathan: No, I know. But you know how Cranky Fangs is sometimes. I mean, it feels like I am, but not really.

See more Hotel Transylvania 4 Quotes

Jonathan: [referring to the hotel] So many great ideas. I’m dizzy with hospitality creativity. Like horizontal escalators all through the lobby. Name tags for all guests for more casual relations. Green energy saving options. Stationary bikes in every room for your own power source. It’s going to be the ultimate Johnny takeover!

Dracula: I actually can’t give you the hotel.
Jonathan: What?
Dracula: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. It is an old, very, very old, very ancient, very serious real estate law!
Jonathan: Real estate law?
Dracula: Yes. Yes. It says, “No residence, whether it be residential, or commercial, shall ever be transferred to, owned by, or inherited to a human. For if it did, to wit, then that property shall be forfeited and repossessed unto it.”
Jonathan: Woh. Those are some serious “its”.

Murray: [referring to Dracula trying to make an announcement] What is wrong with him?
Frankenstein: Boy, is he nervous.
Wayne: This is hard to watch.
Griffin: Get on with it!
Eunice: Griffin!
Griffin: What? He’s dying up there.
Eunice: I know, but you have to be respectful.
Eunice: [stands and yells] Get on with it already!

Dracula: And I feel that now is the time for Hotel Transylvania to, oh. Expand! Yes! We are expanding the hotel!
Erika, Mavis: What?!
Dracula: Yes. Yes. In order to address the increasingly long lines, I am pleased to announce we will be adding a new restroom to the lobby.
Murray: You can’t never have enough bathrooms.

Jonathan: Oh, man. This is all my fault. I ruined everything, all because I’m not a monster.
Van Helsing: So, you want to become a monster, huh?
Jonathan: Van Helsing?
Van Helsing: I can help with that. I’ve got just the thing down in my lab. The question is, where did I put it?

Van Helsing: Behold, the Monsterfication Ray. It turns any human into a monster.
Jonathan: Awesome! But is it safe though?
Van Helsing: Great question. What we need is a guinea pig. Meet Gigi.
Jonathan: Aw. She’s so cute.
Van Helsing: Not for long.

Jonathan: Hey, Drac. What’s up?
Dracula: Johnny?
Jonathan: Yeah, it’s me. I’m a monster. Check out these big feet. And these claws, ooh. And these ears, they’re so pointy. And, look, I’ve got a tail!

Zombie: [as he turns human] What? I can’t believe it. The nightmare, it’s over! I’m human again!
[gets bitten by another zombie and turns back into a zombie]

Dennis: Papa Drac, is that my dad?
Dracula: [hypnotizing them] That was not your father, just some random monster. Everything is normal.

Frankenstein: Did you see Johnny? He’s a monster!
Dracula: I know! I can’t fly!
Wayne: Did he just say “Wow, that’s a fly?”
Griffin: No, he definitely said something about pie.

Dracula: No! It can’t be.
Jonathan: Wow, look at us, Drac. You’re human, and I’m a monster. It’s like Freaky Friday, but on a Tuesday though.
Dracula: Aaah!

Jonathan: Hey, Drac. What’s wrong?
Dracula: Oh, it is the humanness!

Van Helsing: [referring to the crystals to fix the ray] These crystals are very rare and hard to come by. It took me three years to find that one. You see, I was a young monster hunter at the time, well, not too young, but I felt young.
Dracula: Okay, don’t need the whole story.

Jonathan: [referring to South America] We can just pop down there and get a new one!
Van Helsing: If it were but that simple, my friend. First, you must travel through the treacherous jungle. Survival’s doubtful. Then down a perilous river, until you reach the Cave of the Reflexión! Where entering is deadly, and escape impossible! It cost me my right back wheel.
Dracula: Sorry for your loss?

Dracula: [tries to turn into a bat but nothing happens] Right. Still human.

Wayne: I think Johnny looks way better as a monster.
Griffin: Yeah, there’s a good looking guy in there.
Murray: Ooh, and the green really brings out his eyes.

Wayne: [as Dracula texts them] Drac always does this. I hate getting caught between him and Mavis.
Frankenstein: What should I write back?
Murray: How about, “No, we’re not covering for you anymore?”
Griffin: Yeah, “Now that you’re human, you can’t do nothing about it.”
Wayne: “Go do your own dirty work for a change, buster.”
Frankenstein: Okay, got it. Send.
Griffin, Murray: What?!
Wayne: You actually sent that?!
Murray: Oh, man. We’re in trouble now.
Frankenstein: No, I just sent him a gif.

Griffin: [as he’s turning human] Oh, no, no. What’s this, you guys? Oh, I’m balding?

Jonathan: Wow. Flying as a monster is so much better. Right, Drac?
Airbag Monster: [as Dracula’s hyperventilating] Feeling better? Nervous flyer, huh?
Dracula: How is this plane even in the sky?! What is that sound? Do you smell burning? Is that duct tape holding the wing together?!

Mavis: Have you seen Papa Drac, or your father?
Dennis, Winnie: [monotone] That was not my father, just some random monster. Everything is normal.
Mavis: Okay, yep. Something’s definitely going on.

Dracula: The sun!
Jonathan: Drac? The sun won’t fry you now. You’re human, remember? It’s totally safe.
Dracula: [as he stares at the sun] The sun it’s magnificent. I cannot believe that my whole life I have missed this elegant splendor. It’s glorious. It’s wondrous. It’s burning my eyes! I’m blind!

Dracula: Johnny, your monsterness is weighing us down. We’re getting nowhere.

Murray: [as they’ve all turned human] Have you seriously been naked this whole time?
Griffin: Yeah. Why would only my glasses be visible?

Mavis: Who are those guys?
Griffin: It’s me, Uncle Griffin. You don’t recognize me?
Mavis: No! I’ve literally never seen you before!

Eunice: [to Frank] I leave you alone for five minutes, and you become a human?!

Mavis: [as they see Dracual and Johnny on the news] Wait, that looks kind of like… Johnny?!
Murray: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Your dad’s a human now, and Johnny’s a monster. Oh, no. I was not supposed to say that out loud.

Jonathan: What is that smell? Oh.
Dracula: What is that? Oh! It’s me!
Jonathan: Drac, chill. You just need a shower.
Dracula: And where am I going to find a shower in the middle of the jungle?
[suddenly starts raining]

Dracula: [as he’s sweating] How am I so wet, and yet completely dry?

Ericka: I don’t understand. What are they doing in South America?
Mavis: And how did they change themselves in the first place?
Ericka: Exactly! It’s not like there’s a mad scientist just living in the basement. Oh.

Jonathan: Being a monster is super weird.
Dracula: Yeah. But being a human is the worst.
Jonathan: Ah, come on. I wouldn’t say that.
Dracula: Really? Blisters, sunburn, and swamp butt aren’t the worst?

Dracula: What was that? Mosquito!
Jonathan: Vampires of the jungle.
Dracula: Hey, I resent that.

Frankenstein: [to Griffin] Keep your shirt on, pal. We’ve seen more than enough of you. Me, on the other hand, easy on the eyes.
Eunice: Ugh, please.

Dracula: Oh! My head! What? What’s going on?
Jonathan: Have a good nap?
Dracula: Nap? You slapped me so hard I lost consciousness!
Jonathan: But I did get that mosquito.

Jonathan: Ah, man. Boy, that was fun.
Dracula: Right. Getting lost and almost falling to your death is super fun.
Jonathan: Okay, Mr. Cranky Fangs. Whatever you say.

Jonathan: [to Dracula] If you only see the worst in things, you’ll miss the best part.

Jonathan: At first, a tasty marshmallow. Then… Oh, no! It’s on fire and ruined! But blow out the fire, and crack open the burnt stuff. You’ll find something sweet and gooey inside. You just have to look for it.
Dracula: [as he eats the burnt marshmallow] Gooeylicious!

Dracula: I guess it’s always been hard for me to see the positive side of things. You know, raising a daughter on your own for so long, you’re constantly worried. Always fearing the worst. That’s why I built the hotel. To protect her. To protect all of us. It’s part of our family.

Ericka: Hey, hot stuff.
Dracula: Ericka!
Ericka: [as Dracula tries to look like his old self] Don’t sweat it. I love you inside and out.

Dracula: Guys? You, I mean, you’re…
Murray: Human? Yeah, we noticed.
Frankenstein: Though in my case, it’s a huge improvement.

Dracula: I can explain. It all happened so fast. You see, Johnny found out that I was giving you guys the hotel. But then he, you know, had a Johnny takeover. Escalators, name changes, blah, blah, blah. And so I, well, you know. I panicked!
Mavis: And lied?
Jonathan: Wait. There’s no monster real estate law?

Mavis: This is all your fault! All Johnny wanted was to feel like he was part of this family, but you could never accept him. All you care about is your stupid hotel!
Dracula: Mavis, I was going to…
Mavis: And now, because of you, I might lose him forever!

Dracula: Okay, everybody, the crystal has to be here somewhere. We’ll find it as long as we stay focused and don’t get separated.
[looks behind him and sees everyone gone]

Mavis: What is going on? Did you find the crystal?
Dracula: Ugh, the crystal? We can’t even find each other. It’s cuckoo in here!

Wanda: Wendy, Wally, Wilma, Wyatt…
Wayne: Is this all of them?
Wanda: Not even close!

Dracula: [as Johnny is turning into mindless monster] Johnny, you are the marshmallow!
Jonathan: Huh?
All: Huh?
Griffin: Wait, he had a marshmallow on him?

Dracula: You said that if I only saw the worst in things, I would miss the best parts. And you were right. I was so worried that you would ruin everything I cared about, that I didn’t see you. Your kindness, your energy, your Johnnyness. Before you, my life was like a burnt marshmallow, hard, and crunchy, and sad. But you cracked it open and became the ooey-gooey center of all of our lives.
Wayne: We’re dead.

Dracula: [to Johnny] What I’m trying to say is, that you are part of the family. My family. I can’t believe it took becoming a human to finally realize it. And I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to say it, and maybe now it’s too late. But you taught me to look for the good in everything. And now I see that so much of the good in my life is because of you.

Murray: No! You are keeping those on!
Griffin: Don’t be so uptight. I’m inviz.
Murray: Man, just because you’re invisible doesn’t mean you get to be naked. What is wrong with you?

Jonathan: I wonder if Van Helsing can adjust this thing, so that I’m a monster, but still me.
Mavis: I don’t think so.
Jonathan: Ah, come on. How about just a tail?
Mavis: No, Johnny. You’re perfect just the way you are.

Dracula: I know a lot has happened, but I was hoping that if you’re still interested, I wanted to say that the hotel is destroyed!
Jonathan, Mavis: [they turn to see the hotel is on fire] Huh?!

Jonathan: Don’t worry, Drac. We’ll rebuild it just the way it was.
Dracula: No. Rebuild it the way you want to. It’s your hotel now.
Mavis: Dad, are you sure?
Dracula: It’s time to begin a new chapter.

Dracula: [at the re-opening] The hotel! I don’t understand. It’s exactly the same!
Mavis: Well, we just made a couple of tiny adjustments.
Dracula: Huh?