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Starring: Jamie Foxx, Dave Franco, Snoop Dogg, Meagan Goodd, Karla Souza, Natasha Liu Bordizzo, Oliver Masucci, Steve Howey, Scott Adkins, Zion Broadnax
OUR RATING: ★★½
Story:
Netflix action horror comedy directed by J.J. Perry. Day Shift (2022) follows hard working blue collar dad, Bud Jablonski (Jamie Foxx), who just wants to provide a good life for his daughter. But his mundane San Fernando Valley pool cleaning job is a front for his real source of income, hunting and killing vampires as part of an international Union of vampire hunters.
Our Favorite Quotes:
'In the end, the Devil comes for everyone.' - Audrey San Fernando (Day Shift) Click To Tweet
Best Quotes
Bud Jablonski: [after decapitating a vampire] Works every time with your old a**.
When was the last time you been to the dentist, huh?
Bud Jablonski: [as he extracts one of the vampire’s teeth] Money.
Audrey San Fernando: Do you know what the definition of insanity is, Sasha? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. You cling to the old ways like a tick on a dog’s a**. And look at where that’s gotten us.
Sasha: I made a mistake. You want this? You have it.
Audrey San Fernando: There you go again, lacking imagination. “You, our, yours.” These are words of division, darling. And divided, we are vulnerable. But together? The sky is the limit. And why rent when you can own?
Bud Jablonski: Who’s your favorite daddy?
Paige Jablonski: You.
Bud Jablonski: I’m your only daddy, I hope.
Paige Jablonski: We went to Yogurtworld.
Jocelyn Jablonski: Oh! Did you?
Bud Jablonski: Snitches get stitches. I thought we were going to keep that between us.
Jocelyn Jablonski: She needs stability.
Bud Jablonski: She has stability. She got you. She got me. She got Yogurtworld. Ain’t no Yogurtworld in Florida!
Jocelyn Jablonski: And she needs braces.
Bud Jablonski: What’s wrong with her teeth?
Jocelyn Jablonski: Her teeth are jacked up.
Bud Jablonski: She always says she likes her teeth because they look like my teeth.
Jocelyn Jablonski: That’s my point.
Jocelyn Jablonski: I have one more question. Paige said that there’s a porn star living in your building? How does she even know what a porn star is?
Bud Jablonski: It’s the Valley, Joss. They live amongst us.
'Friendships are complicated.' - Bud Jablonski (Day Shift) Click To Tweet
Troy: Decided to take me up on my offer?
Bud Jablonski: Not today, not tomorrow, not anytime.
Bud Jablonski: Like I said, Troy, Snake Eyes ain’t for sale now.
Troy: Everything’s for sale. You just have to be desperate enough.
Troy: Hey, smoker. That’s a nasty habit, don’t you think? He would have died from smoking if he wasn’t dead already.
Troy: [referring to the vampire teeth] A decade early, and a whole lot of dollars short, so I can give you like two grand for this.
Bud Jablonski: Two thousand, Troy? Two thousand? Listen, I don’t think you understand. I need cash today.
Troy: Then go and rob a bank, or do something. I’m a businessman!
Bud Jablonski: Big J, you ain’t changed a bit, baby. I see you. I see you. What’s happening?
Big John Elliott: You know me, cutting necks and cashing checks.
Dry Cleaner Mimoko: Yes?
Big John Elliott: Pink penguin puffy pants.
Ralph Seeger: Why should I extend you yet another lifeline?
Big John Elliott: Ralph, let me be the first to tell you. Bud here, he’s a new man.
Bud Jablonski: Yeah.
Ralph Seeger: Is that right?
Bud Jablonski: Yes, sir. Absolutely. I’m a changed man. I’ve cut out pork, and cartoons, and minimal white women.
Bud Jablonski: I want the night shift.
Ralph Seeger: Not on my life.
Bud Jablonski: Come on, Seeger. That’s where the big money is!
Ralph Seeger: No. Not a chance. The amount of s**t you stirred up working night shift, you expect me to let you back out there where the sun don’t shine?
Bud Jablonski: Fine. Day shift.
Seth: Carol, did you eat my yogurt again? I even wrote my name on the lid today, so you literally had to peel back my name to get to the yogurt. Oh, what, you can’t hear me? I’m going to fart in my yogurt tomorrow, and you’re going to eat my fart.
'Do you know what the definition of insanity is? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.' - Audrey San Fernando (Day Shift) Click To Tweet
Seth: Right, but I’m begging you to reconsider. I’m not meant for the field. I just bought an ergonomic chair with my own money. I’m all in on the desk.
Ralph Seeger: [referring to Bud] Well, that’s why I need you out there with him. Right. Someone who knows the codes to the letter.
Ralph Seeger: [referring to Bud] The sooner he f***s up, the sooner your sweet cheeks are in Carol’s desk. You work out?
Seth: A little.
Ralph Seeger: Yeah, thought so.
Seth: I got you an organic, gluten-free, paleo bran muffin.
Bud Jablonski: [as he tosses the muffin into the garbage] Really? Thank you. I was starving.
Seth: That was a six-dollar muffin.
Seth: The handbook says you’re supposed to blend in on the hunt. Be inconspicuous.
Bud Jablonski: You have on a suit. How’s that inconspicuous? You have on a suit. We’re in the Valley. In the summertime.
Seth: It’s a summery suit.
Bud Jablonski: A summery suit?
Seth: Juniper green. Yes.
Bud Jablonski: What is juniper green?
Seth: It’s a hue of green that I found to be complementary against my skin tone.
Bud Jablonski: [to Seth] You sound like Big John. Whole lot of gibberish.
Bud Jablonski: [to Seth] Listen, Guacamole Suit, right there on the shelf, grab that for me. Get that, and we’ll take off. And remember, whatever you do, don’t drop my s**t.
[Seth drops the box]
Seth: So, where are we going?
Bud Jablonski: I’m going hunting. I don’t know about you.
Seth: Can I offer some advice?
Bud Jablonski: No.
Seth: I have to be with you at all times in the field. Union rules.
Bud Jablonski: Other than keeping you alive, I don’t give a s**t about the rules.
Seth: I don’t believe in guns.
Bud Jablonski: You don’t believe in them?
Seth: No. They’re amoral. They’re killing machines. They’re not for me. When I was a kid, I tried shooting a squirrel with a BB gun, and I just couldn’t. Alright? I still have nightmares where I can see his little face making little squirrel noises, and I still have nightmares about it, okay?
'Am I just supposed to wear turtlenecks from now on? I mean, I do look good in a T-neck, but that's not sustainable.' - Seth (Day Shift) Click To Tweet
Audrey San Fernando: [to Troy] Did you know that a vampire cannot live without its fangs? And yet, for whatever reason, whatever cruel joke from the gods, they are the one thing we cannot regenerate. Everything that makes a vampire a predator is in its fangs. Each set is a life that could have lived a thousand lives. Lives that you had a part in ending.
Audrey San Fernando: [to Troy] The way I see it, you have two choices, two doors. One, you bend the knee, and join me in service, and you live. And two, you don’t.
Troy: You’re so full of s**t, lady. You think you’re a god? You’re not gods. You’re a big mistake. You’re a genetic mutation that would’ve died out if there hadn’t been a stinking hole for y’all to crawl into.
Audrey San Fernando: Door number two it is.
Bud Jablonski: Time for the tooth fairy.
Ralph Seeger: Ugh! Hair on your nipples!
Bud Jablonski: [referring to the vampire attacking him] Hurry up! Shoot it!
Seth: I don’t have my gun!
Bud Jablonski: Give me my shotgun!
Seth: I’m just an observer!
Bud Jablonski: Well, your going to be hors d’œuvre if you don’t give me that gun!
Seth: Look at me! Vampires just tried to kill me. You put a gun in my face, and now I just pi**ed my favorite f***ing suit!
Bud Jablonski: Hey. Hey. Relax. You did good in there. You did good in there. Besides, everybody pi**es themselves the first time.
Seth: Really?
Bud Jablonski: Yeah.
Seth: Did you?
Bud Jablonski: No, I didn’t. But listen, you did.
'We survive everything. See me fighting a bear, you pour honey on me.' - Bud Jablonski (Day Shift) Click To Tweet
Bud Jablonski: Here, take this. It’s my special blend, like a little skunk musk, okay? Now, get that on you, in the shower.
Seth: Oh, Jesus.
Bud Jablonski: On every inch of you, okay? Be extremely careful. Don’t get it in your eyes. And whatever you do, don’t get it in your butthole.
Seth: What happens in the butthole?
Bud Jablonski: I mean, it can’t kill you, but Jesus Christ.
Bud Jablonski: Feeling better?
Seth: Not really. I got a little bit of that yellow stuff in my butthole. It was so much worse than what you even described.
Bud Jablonski: Bet it was.
Trailer: