The Lego Movie Quotes: Imaginative Nostalgic Fun(Total Quotes: 129)
Dan Hageman (story)
Kevin Hageman (story)
Phil Lord (story and screenplay)
Christopher Miller (story and screenplay)
Chris Pratt – Emmet Brickowoski
Will Ferrell – Lord Business / President Business / The Man Upstairs
Elizabeth Banks – Wyldstyle / Lucy
Will Arnett – Batman / Bruce Wayne
Morgan Freeman – Vitruvius
Liam Neeson – Bad Cop / Good Cop / Pa Cop
Craig Berry – Blake
Alison Brie – Unikitty
David Burrows – Octan Robot
Anthony Daniels – C-3PO
Charlie Day – Benny
Amanda Farinos – Mom
Keith Ferguson – Han Solo
Will Forte – Abraham Lincolne
Dave Franco – Wally
Todd Hansen – Gandalf
Jonah Hill – Green Lantern
Jake Johnson – Barry
Keegan-Michael Key – Foreman Jim
Kelly Lafferty – Lord Business’ Assistant
Chris McKay – Larry The Barrista
Christopher Miller – TV Presenter
Graham Miller – Duplo
Doug Nicholas – Surfer Dave
Shaquille O’Neal – Shaq
Nick Offerman – Metal Beard
Chris Paluszek – Robot Foreman
OUR REVIEW & RATING ★★★★½
From the opening scene The Lego Movie quotes fires off an endless array of hysterical jokes that are full of high energy, slightly edgy and smart.
The story centers on Emmett, an ordinary Lego construction worker, carrying out his daily duties in accordance with the instruction manual provided to all Lego citizens by President Business, an obsessive compulsive tyrannical CEO bent on world domination. A chance encounter with the beautiful WyldStyle leads Emmett to the mythical fellowship, Piece of Resistance, an ancient relic spoken of only in prophecy that can be used to save the Lego citizens from their impending doom. Emmett is then drafted into the fellowship and goes on an epic quest along with an old mystic named Vitruvius, WyldStyle and her boyfriend, Batman to defeat President Business.
The narrative is fairly generic but it has been executed with a brilliant mix of humor, creativity and heart that the story feels incredibly new and original. Almost every scene contains a silly joke or gag, including a lot of Easter eggs that begs a repeat viewing, and skillfully manages to avoid cynicism and clichés. The voice cast all succeed in making their characters colorful and memorable with Chris Pratt, Will Ferrell, Will Arnett and Liam Neeson being the most notable.
Verdict: The Lego Movie succeeds in being a ridiculously entertaining, nostalgic and imaginative family movie that is fast-paced, quick-witted and clever.
[first lines; we see deep within the Lego mountain Vitruvius is guarding something when he senses someone approaching]
Vitruvius: He’s coming. Cover your butt.
Guard: Cover the what?
[Lord Business busts in and does an evil laugh]
Lord Business: Vitruvius.
Vitruvius: Lord Business.
Lord Business: You’ve hidden the Kragle well, old man.
[turning to his army of Lego robots]
Lord Business: Robots, destroy him!
Robots: Yes, Lord Business.
Vitruvius: Your robots are no match for a Master Builder, for our eyes see everything!
[he sends out four Lego falcons and they get immediately destroyed by Lord Business, Vitruvius covers his eyes]
Vitruvius: My eyes!
[after knocking down Vitruvius Lord Business goes over to the Kragle]
Lord Business: The Kragle, the most powerful super weapon is mine.
[he opens the Kragle]
Lord Business: Ah! The Kragle!
[he does an evil laugh]
Lord Business: Now my evil power will be unlimited! Can you feel me?!
Robot: I can feel you.
[his robots start carrying the Kragle away]
Lord Business: Wooh! Nothing’s gonna stop me now!
Vitruvius: Wait! There is a prophecy.
Lord Business: Oh, now there’s a prophecy.
[he turns to Vitruvius]
Vitruvius: About the Piece of Resistance.
Lord Business: Oh, yes, the supposed missing Piece of Resistance that can somehow magically disarm the Kragle. Give me a break!
[Vitruvius rises and turns to face Lord Business, suddenly his eyes shine brightly]
Vitruvius: One day a talented lass or fellow, a Special one with face of yellow, will make the Piece of Resistance found from its hiding refuge underground. And with a noble army at the helm, this Master Builder will thwart the Kragle and save the realm, and be the greatest, most interesting, most important person of all times. All this is true, because it rhymes.
Lord Business: Oh, well. That was a great inspiring legend that you made up.
[suddenly he kicks Vitruvius with his giant robot leg off the edge of the cliff]
Lord Business: The Special one? What a bunch of hippy dippy baloney.
[8 and a half years later; Emmet Brickowoski waking up in his apartment and turns off his alarm, he gets out bed yaws and stretches and walks through to his living room]
Emmet Brickowoski: Good morning, apartment! Good morning, doorway! Good morning, wall. Good morning, ceiling. Good morning, floor! Ready to start the day!
[he grabs a book from a shelf]
Emmet Brickowoski: Ah, here it is.
[reading from the manual]
Emmet Brickowoski: The instructions to fit in, have everybody like you, and always be happy! Step one; breathe.
[Emmet inhales and exhales deeply]
Emmet Brickowoski: Okay, got that one down. Step two; greet today’s smile and say…
[we see all the Lego citizens opening their window and yelling]
Lego Citizens: Good morning, city!
[back to Emmet continuing with the instructions from the manual]
Emmet Brickowoski: Step three; exercise. Jumping Jacks him ’em!
[he start jumping on the spot]
Emmet Brickowoski: One. Two. Three. I am so pumped up!
[looking at the manual again]
Emmet Brickowoski: Step four; shower.
[Emmet gets in the shower and starts washing himself]
Emmet Brickowoski: And always be sure to keep the soap out of your eyaaahh!
[he screams as the soap gets into his eyes]
[next we see Emmet standing in front of the bathroom mirror shaving]
Emmet Brickowoski: Shave your face, brush your teeth. Comb your hair.
[he laughs to himself as he brushes his hair]
Emmet Brickowoski: Wear clothes.
[we see Emmet walking out of his apartment naked until he realizes]
Emmet Brickowoski: Woop! Almost forgot that one!
[he turns back into his apartment and we see him quickly trying on different outfits]
Emmet Brickowoski: No. No. Uh-uh. No. Got that wrong.
[he finally wears his construction uniform]
Emmet Brickowoski: And that’s it, check! Step nine; eat a complete breakfast with all the special people in your life.
[we see him sitting in his living room eating his breakfast alone]
[he turns to his plant]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hey, planty! What do you want to do this morning? Watch TV? Me too!
[he turns on the TV showing President Business giving a presentation]
President Business: Hi, I’m President Business, president of the Octan Corporation and the World. Let’s all take extra care to follow the instructions…
[whispers into microphone]
President Business: …or you’ll be put to sleep.
President Business: [shouting] And don’t forget Taco Tuesday’s coming next week! That’s the day every rule following citizen gets a free taco and my love! Have a great day, everybody!
Emmet Brickowoski: You have a great day too, President Business. Man, he’s such a cool guy. I always wanna hear more of…wait! Did he say put to sleep?!
[suddenly Emmet gets distracted by the TV showing a promo of a sitcom]
TV Presenter: Tonight on “Where are my Pants?”
Actor on TV Show: Honey? Where are my pants?
[he steps out showing that he’s not wearing any pants and we hear canned laughter, Emmet laughs hard at this and falls of the couch]
Emmet Brickowoski: What was I just thinking? I don’t care.
Emmet Brickowoski: Step eleven; greet your neighbors.
[we see Emmet walking to work and saying hi to everyone he passes]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hey, Joe.
Joe: Hey, pal.
[Joe, carrying a massive pole turns nearly hitting Emmet who quickly ducks]
Emmet Brickowoski: Woh.
[Emmet spots someone he knows across the street]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hey, Surfer Dave.
Surfer Dave: Hey, brah.
[walking down the street]
Emmet Brickowoski: Good morning, Sharon.
Sharon: Hi, Emmet.
[suddenly her cats starts walking out of her apartment]
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, hey, Jasmine. Dexter. Andy! Loki, Brad, Leroy, Fluffy, Fluffy Junior, Fluffy Senior, Jeff.
[Emmet gets into car and drives into work]
Emmet Brickowoski: Step twelve; obey all traffic signs and regulations. Step thirteen; enjoy popular music.
[he turns on the radio]
Radio DJ: Jumping Jacks and Daddy “Everything is Awesome”.
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, my gosh! I love this song!
[the music starts playing]
Music on Radio: Everything is awesome. Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome when you’re living out a dream.
Emmet Brickowoski: Always use the turn signal, park between the lines.
[Emmet and everyone else parks in exactly the same way]
Emmet Brickowoski: Yes! Drop off dry cleaning before noon, read the headlines, don’t forget to smile.
[he waves and smiles to everyone as he walks down the street]
Emmet Brickowoski: Always root for the local sports team.
[Emmet and the Lego citizens shouts]
Lego Citizens: Go, sports team!
Emmet Brickowoski: Always return a compliment.
[to the male Lego citizen stepping out of the coffee shop]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hey, you look nice.
[everyone turns to Emmet]
Lego Citizens: So do you.
Emmet Brickowoski: Drink overpriced coffee!
[inside the coffee shop he buys a coffee]
Larry The Barrista: There you go. That’s thirty-seven dollars.
[Emmet looks at him for a moment before replying with excitement]
Emmet Brickowoski: Awesome!
[Emmet walks to work with his overpriced coffee following the line of all the other construction workers doing exactly the same]
Construction Worker: Did you see “Where are my Pants?” last night?
[everyone replies at the same time]
Construction Worker: Classic episode.
[the Everything is Awesome” music continues to play in the background as the Lego construction workers get into position]
Foreman: Instructions coming in from central. Okay, it says here that anything that’s weird then blow it up.
[the workers start blowing up the buildings]
Foreman: Alright, everyone, let’s make it look exactly like it does in the instruction.
Construction Worker #1: Hey, buddy! I need one-by-two keyhole!
Emmet Brickowoski: No, problem, Michael.
Construction Worker #2: Two-by-two macaroni over here.
Emmet Brickowoski: Two-by-tow macaroni flying in. Here’s one, Mel.
[they all start singing along to “Everything is Awesome”]
Emmet Brickowoski: Man, I feel so good right now! I can sing this song for hours!
[5 Hours Later; everyone at the construction site is still singing “Everything is Awesome” and it’s finally coming to the end of the day]
Construction Worker #1: When you’re part of a team! Wooh! Yeah! I’m going to the Sports Bar after work tonight. Who wants to eat some delicious chicken wings and get crazy!
[as the other constructions workers start leave together, Emmet is left behind and tries to get their attention]
Emmet Brickowoski: Chicken wings! I love chicken wings!
Construction Worker #2: Yeah, who wants to share a croissant with this guy?
Emmet Brickowoski: Croissant! I love croissant!
Construction Worker #3: Oh, yeah! I sure do love giant sausages!
Emmet Brickowoski: Giant sausages! No way!
[nobody pays Emmet any attention as he tries to join them]
Emmet Brickowoski: You know what I love to do? Is share a meal with the special people in my life. Fred, Barry, Gail, me and you…
[suddenly Emmet slams into a construction post, falls and a gust of wind blow his instruction manual out of his hand]
Emmet Brickowoski: Ah, no! Wait! Guys, wait up! Okay, I’ll meet you there!
[Emmet chases after his instruction manual as the wind continues to carry it off]
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, where did it go?
[he finds the manual lying on some Lego rubble]
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, there you are.
[as he retrieves the manual and turns to leave he hears something and stops]
Emmet Brickowoski: I think I heard a whoosh.
[Emmet goes to find the sources of the noise]
[we see a hooded figure holding a device that is searching for a relic, just as they relic is detected Emmet notices the hooded figure]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hey, pal, I hate to tell you this, but uh…I don’t think you’re supposed to be here. Yeah, as the rule specifically states; works light closes at six, it’s a hard hat area only.
[looking at the hooded figure’s outfit]
Emmet Brickowoski: That’s not official safety orange.
[Emmet reads from his manual]
Emmet Brickowoski: If you see anything weird, report it immediately.
[he grabs his phone]
Emmet Brickowoski: Well, I guess I’m gonna have to report yyyyyyyyyy…
[in that moment the hooded figure removes its hood to reveal a beautiful woman, Emmet suddenly gets is frozen on the spot by her beauty, the girl gets fed up and makes a run for it]
Emmet Brickowoski: Where are you going? Miss, I didn’t mean to scare you! I’m so…aaahhh!
[as he starts going after her he trips and falls down a big hole in the ground]
[as Emmet falls underground he gets continually knocked about]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hello!
[he lands on his back in an area where half the walls are painted in rainbow colors]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hey, that’s not so bad.
[suddenly he starts to fall again and gets knocked about further until he finally falls to the ground and notices a giant block encased in crystal which is shining brightly]
Emmet Brickowoski: What is that?
[he hears a voice coming from the block]
Voice: Come here.
Emmet Brickowoski: What do I do? I don’t have my instructions.
[the voice from the giant block gets louder]
Voice: Touch the beams.
Emmet Brickowoski: I feel like maybe I should touch that.
[Emmet gets up and starts walking over to the giant block, he becomes completely transfixed and steps over his instruction manual, he slowly extends his hand and touches the block and immediately gets a vision which includes Vitruvius reciting the Piece of Resistance prophecy]
Vitruvius: A Special one with face of yellow, will make the Piece of Resistance found from its hiding refuge underground…
[Emmet then passes out]
[as Emmet slowly wakes he hears someone’s voice interrogating him]
Bad Cop: Wake up. Come on, wake up. Where is the Master Builder? Where did you find the Piece of Resistance? Hey?
[Emmet starts to open his eyes]
Emmet Brickowoski: Good morning apartment….?
Bad Cop: Wake up!
[suddenly an angry looking cop shines a light onto Emmet making him immediately awake]
Bad Cop: Where did you find the Piece of Resistance?
Emmet Brickowoski: The Piece of what?
Bad Cop: The Piece of Resistance. Where is it?!
[suddenly he knocks a chair aside in anger scaring Emmet]
[we see Emmet is being held in an interrogation room with his hands shackled to chair]
Emmet Brickowoski: I…I don’t…! Where am I? What’s happening?
Bad Cop: What’s happening? Playing dumb, Master Builder.
Emmet Brickowoski: No. I…Master Builder?
Bad Cop: Oh, so you’ve never heard of the prophecy?
Emmet Brickowoski: No.
Bad Cop: Or the Special?
Emmet Brickowoski: No! No! I…
Bad Cop: You are a liar!
[Bad Cop starts to kick and wrestle around with the chair in the room]
[as Emmet watches Bad Cop continue to wrestle and kick the chair]
Emmet Brickowoski: Look, um…I watch a lot of cop shows on TV. Isn’t there supposed to also be a…isn’t there supposed to be a good cop?
[Bad Cop throws a chair in Emmet’s direction and Emmet quickly ducks]
Bad Cop: Oh, yes. But we’re not done yet.
[suddenly Bad Cop turns his face which changes to the cheerful Good Cop]
Good Cop: Hi, buddy! I’m your friendly neighborhood police officer. Would you like a glass of water?
[he holds a cup of water towards Emmet]
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh. Yeah, actually…
[Emmet goes to reach for the cup when suddenly Good Cop changes his face to Bad Cop]
Bad Cop: Too bad.
[he then knocks cup off the table]
Bad Cop: Security cameras picked up this.
[he shows Emmet the footage on the TV monitor next to them]
Bad Cop: You were found at the construction site convulsing with a strange piece.
Emmet Brickowoski: That’s disgusting!
Bad Cop: Then why is it permanently stuck to your back?
[suddenly we see the block is attached to Emmet’s back]
Emmet Brickowoski: Aah! Aah!
[Emmet moves his chair back in an attempt to get the block off his back]
Emmet Brickowoski: Get off me! It won’t come off! It’s chasing me! Look, it’s not my fault! I have no idea how this thing got on my back.
[Bad Cop changes it’s face to Good Cop]
Good Cop: Of course, buddy. I believe you.
Emmet Brickowoski: Great!
[suddenly Bad Cop appears beside Emmet]
Bad Cop: I believe you too. You see the quotations I’m making with my claw hands? It means I don’t believe you! Why else would you show up with that thing on your back just three days before President Business is going to use the Kragle to end the world?
Emmet Brickowoski: President Business is gonna end the world? But he’s such a good guy! And Octan, they make good stuff; music, dairy products, coffee, TV shows, surveillance systems, all history books, voting machines… Wait a minute.
Bad Cop: Come on, you can’t be this stupid.
Emmet Brickowoski: Look, this is a misunderstanding. I’m just a regular, normal, ordinary guy. And I’m late to meet my best friends in the whole world, and they’re probably missing me right now. They’re probably out looking around, “Hey, where’s Emmet? Hey, where’s my best friend Emmet?” And you know what? Ask all my friends, they’ll tell you!
Bad Cop: Oh, we asked them alright. Boom!
[he turns on the TV monitor which shows Emmet’s construction work colleagues being interviewed about Emmet]
Randy: That guy’s not a criminal mastermind.
Emmet Brickowoski: See!
Barry: Yeah, he’s kind of your average, normal, kind of guy.
Emmet Brickowoski: Thank you.
Barry: But you know, he’s not…he’s not like normal like us. No, he…he’s not that special.
Gail: I’m so confused. Who are we talking about?
[Emmet’s smile starts to disappear]
[Gail looks at the photo of Emmet being shown to her]
Gail: Wait, does he work with us?
Emmet Brickowoski: Gail doesn’t remember me?
Barry: Look at Randy here, he likes sausage. That’s something. Gail is perky, that’s something. Harry…well!
Fred: When you say Harry, I go…
[he starts laughing]
Fred: When you say the other guy, I go…
[he just looks into the camera showing no emotion, Emmet, now looking really upset, continues to watch his friends being interviewed]
Surfer Dave: I know that guy, but I know like zippy-zappo about him.
Emmet Brickowoski: We just talked earlier.
Fred: And I mean, all he does is say yes to everything everybody else is doing.
[we see Larry the Barrista guy being interviewed]
Larry The Barrista: You know, he’s just sort of a…little bit of a…blank slate, I guess.
[we hear him talking to a customer]
Larry The Barrista: That’ll be forty-two dollars, please.
Randy: We all have something that makes us something, and Emmet is…nothing.
[Emmet looks devastated; to Bad Cop]
Emmet Brickowoski: There you go. I told you I was a nobody.
Bad Cop: No, it’s the perfect cover.
Emmet Brickowoski: Cover? Cover for what?
Bad Cop: I can’t break him. Take him to the melting chamber!
Emmet Brickowoski: What?!
[in the melting chamber Emmet has been strapped to the melting device]
Emmet Brickowoski: Aaah! Aaah! Aaah! You’re going to melt me?! Am I gonna die?
Good Cop: You’ll live, you’ll be fine.
[Bad Cop/Good Cop’s phone rings and Bad Cop answers it]
Bad Cop: President Business. I have him right here, sir. Yes, we’ve told him he’ll live so he doesn’t try to escape. But…we’re lying to him.
[Bad Cop presses the button to activate the melting device and leaves]
Emmet Brickowoski: Wait, what did he just say?
Robot: Hold still.
Emmet Brickowoski: There’s obviously been a mix up here! You’ve got the wro…
[a red beam of light is shot at Emmet’s back to remove the Piece of Resistance]
Emmet Brickowoski: Ow! Ow, ow, ow! Ooow! That is gonna start hurting pretty soon!
[as the Robot starts to increase the heat suddenly the hooded woman, Wyldstyle, that Emmett had noticed in the construction site earlier attacks the robots, takes them all down and goes to Free Emmet]
Emmet Brickowoski: No, no, no!
[she frees him from his iron shackles]
Emmet Brickowoski: Woh! Who are you?
[she takes off her hood to reveal her face and Emmet is transfixed again]
Emmet Brickowoski: It’s you.
[she extends her hand towards him]
Wyldstyle: Come with me if you wanna not die.
[just as Emmet goes to grab her hand Good Cop enters the chamber]
Good Cop: Hi, everybody! How is the melting goi…?
[as he notices Emmet escaping with Wyldstyle Bad Cop appears]
Bad Cop: Hey, hey, hey!
[he starts shooting at Emmet and Wyldstyle]
Bad Cop: Red alert! Red alert! I need everyone, repeat, everyone, to go after the Special.
[after they escape from the melting chamber]
Wyldstyle: The tunnel’s that way!
[as Emmet tries to follow her he lands on the ground with a garbage can stuck to his head]
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, boy!
[looking at Emmet with the garbage can on his head]
Wyldstyle: Oh, sir, you’re brilliant! We’ll build a motorcycle out of the alleyway.
[she hops on top of the garbage can on his head and removes it]
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh!
[then Wyldstyle starts gathering parts to build a motorcycle]
Emmet Brickowoski: So, uh…didn’t catch your name or anything about what you’re uh…up to, or what we’re doing here.
Wyldstyle: It’s brilliant, sir, that you pretended to be a nobody. But you can drop the act with me, it’s cool.
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, the act.
[as Wyldstyle finishes building a really cool looking motorcycle]
Emmet Brickowoski: Woh!
Wyldstyle: Jump on. Let’s go!
[Emmet jumps on to the back of the motorcycle and they leave]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hey, uh…
Wyldstyle: Hang on, sir.
[just then Bad Cop starts following them in his police car]
Bad Cop: All units, cut them off on their own, now!
[suddenly his face changes to Good Cop]
Good Cop: Or whenever you can.
Robot: Yes, sir, Bad Cop.
[as they are being chased and shot at]
Emmet Brickowoski: Watch out!
Wyldstyle: Hold on!
[Wyldstyle manages to avoid hitting the police cars in front of them]
Wyldstyle: We need to meet up with Vitruvius and tell him the Piece has been found.
Emmet Brickowoski: Uh-huh.
[as Bad Cop continues to chase after them]
Bad Cop: Caught up with them on a rail. Release the Copper Choppers.
[the helicopter above them drops down a motorcycle with two cops in it, they start shooting at Wyldstyle and Emmet but Wyldstyle shoots back and manages to get their motorcycle onto the street below]
Emmet Brickowoski: Will you please tell me what is happening?
Wyldstyle: I’m rescuing you, sir. You’re the one that the prophecy spoke of, you’re the Special.
Emmet Brickowoski: Me?
Wyldstyle: You found the Piece of Resistance and the prophecy states that you are the most important, most talented, most interesting and most extraordinary person in the universe. That’s you, right?
Emmet Brickowoski: Uh…yes. That’s me.
Wyldstyle: Great. You drive.
Emmet Brickowoski: What?!
[suddenly she jumps up to knock down the helicopter above them]
[as Emmet is left to drive the motorcycle by himself, he’s got no control over it and starts yelling]
Emmet Brickowoski: I wanna go home! This is not what I mean!
[as Wyldstyle is trying to take down one of the robot cops chasing them on a bike she sees Emmet swerving around on the road]
Wyldstyle: Oh, no! Watch out, Special!
[to the other drivers on the road as Emmet tries to control the bike]
Emmet Brickowoski: I’m sorry! Never driven one of these! I’m sorry!
[as he goes to avoid hitting a truck he accidentally hits back and destroys one of the robots bike’s chasing them]
Wyldstyle: Wow, that’s amazing!
[Wyldstyle then manages to land onto their bike sitting behind Emmet]
Wyldstyle: That was incredible! You’re even better than the prophecy said you’d be.
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, really?
Wyldstyle: I’m, uh…I’m Wyldstyle.
[as he tries to avoid hitting another vehicle]
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, I’m sorry. What was that?
Emmet Brickowoski: Wyldstyle?
Emmet Brickowoski: What are you, a DJ?
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, that’s your name? It’s Wyldstyle?
Emmet Brickowoski: Like on your birth certificate it says Wyldstyle?
Wyldstyle: Let’s not talk about my name!
[instructing his robot cops as he chases after Emmet and Wyldstyle]
Bad Cop: Don’t let the special get away!
Robot: No, we blocked the freeway.
Wyldstyle: Hang on, sir.
Emmet Brickowoski: What are you doing?
[suddenly Wyldstyle starts assembling their vehicle into an aircraft]
Wyldstyle: Let’s fly! Let’s head to the secret tunnel.
[as they get close to the city walls]
Emmet Brickowoski: Uh…these are the city limits!
Wyldstyle: Let’s just head for the tunnel.
[as they get nearer to the wall it suddenly opens up to reveal a secret tunnel]
Emmet Brickowoski: You want me to drive into that weird swirly hole? Are you insane?
Wyldstyle: Don’t break! Go! Don’t stop! Go, now!
Emmet Brickowoski: I can’t do this!
[suddenly Emmet goes to jump out but Wyldstyle grabs him and pulls him back]
Emmet Brickowoski: That is against the instruction!
Wyldstyle: Wait. What’s your favorite restaurant?
Emmet Brickowoski: Any chain restaurant.
Wyldstyle: Favorite TV show?
Emmet Brickowoski: “Where are my pants.”
Wyldstyle: Favorite song?
Emmet Brickowoski: “Everything is Awesome!”
Wyldstyle: Oh, no!
[at that moment they enter the secret tunnel in the wall and it immediately closes up after them making the police cars chasing them and the helicopter crash into it]
Bad Cop: Darn, darn, darn, darny-darn!
[he starts kicking a metal object in anger, one of the cops behind him starts running off, Bad Cop kicks the metal object and it lands on top of the cop that was running off]
[Emmet and Wyldstyle enter into a new Lego world, Emmet screams as he falls and finally lands onto the ground, Wyldstyle leaves him screaming]
Emmet Brickowoski: Wait. Where are we?
[a sign comes up to announced this new Lego world as “The Old West”]
Emmet Brickowoski: This is so weir…
[suddenly Wyldstyle walks over to him and hits him with a giant cactus]
Emmet Brickowoski: Ow!
Wyldstyle: You’re not the Special! You lied to me!
Emmet Brickowoski: Well, I mean it depends…it really depends on…
Wyldstyle: You’re not even a Master Builder, are you?
[Wyldstyle turns and starts walking off and Emmet follows her]
Emmet Brickowoski: Uh…I mean I know what a Master Builder is, why don’t you tell me what it is? That way I could see if you’re right.
Wyldstyle: You ruined the prophecy.
Emmet Brickowoski: I’m sorry, okay? You just made being Special sound so good.
Wyldstyle: To think I was going to follow you to the end of the universe.
Emmet Brickowoski: You were? Well, here’s the thing, how do we know for sure that I’m not the Special? We just don’t know it yet.
[just then Wyldstyle pulls Emmet behind a gravestone as she hears people in the distance]
[Wyldstyle and Emmet watch two cowboys in the distance]
Cowboy #1: You all wanna dry turkey leg?
Cowboy #2: Do you have any idea what that does to your colon?
[suddenly Wyldstyle slips in from above, attacks them and knocks them out]
Emmet Brickowoski: Oh, my G-O-S-H.
[Wyldstyle throws Emmet a cowboy hat]
Wyldstyle: Just put the hat on. Oh, and this. And this, and this. And this.
[from inside the cowboy’s wagon she throws him a poncho, gun and a horse]
Wyldstyle: And by the way, I have a boyfriend.
[she turns and we see she’s wearing an old fashioned western dress]
Emmet Brickowoski: I’m not sure exactly why you bring that up.
Wyldstyle: Super serious and you do not want to mess with him.
Emmet Brickowoski: Okay.
Wyldstyle: So, don’t get any ideas.
[she jumps onto one of the cowboy’s horse]
Emmet Brickowoski: I never have any ideas.
[Emmet sits his horse up and it suddenly runs off]
Emmet Brickowoski: Wait!
[after catching his horse, Emmet catches up with Wyldstyle and rides beside her]
Emmet Brickowoski: Hey, uh…listen. Do you think you can explain to me like why I’m dressed like this and what those big words in the sky were all about and like where we are in time?
[she huffs at him in frustration and her horse does the same]
Wyldstyle: Your home, Bricksburg, is one of many realms in the universe. There’s also this one, Pirates Cove, Knights Club, Vikings Landing, Clown Town, a bunch of others we don’t need to mention.
Emmet Brickowoski: Mm-hmm.
Wyldstyle: Lord Business, or as you think you know him, President Business, stole the Kragle, the most powerful object in the universe…
[as Emmet listen to her he starts seeing and hearing her in a slow dream voice]
Wyldstyle: blah, blah, blah. Proper name. Place name. Backstory stuff…
Emmet Brickowoski: Mm-hmm.
Wyldstyle: …is the Special. The Special…
[again as he watches her he hears her voice in a slow dreamy voice]
Wyldstyle: I’m so pretty. I like you. But I’m angry with you for some reason.
Emmet Brickowoski: Mm-hmm.
Wyldstyle: …at the end of the universe, put the Piece of Resistance onto the Kragle and disarm it forever!
Emmet Brickowoski: Great. I think I got it. But just in case, tell me the whole thing again, I wasn’t listening.
[Wyldstyle huffs at him in frustration again as does her horse]
Wyldstyle: Okay, all the people of the universe were once free to travel and mingle and build whatever they wanted. But President Business was confused by all the chaos, so he erected walls between the worlds and became obsessed with order and perfection, and he stole the mysterious secret super weapon called…
[flashback to when Lord Business stole the Kragle from Vitruvius]
Lord Business: The Kragle!
Wyldstyle: And he hired Bad Cop to hunt down all the Master Builders, who were always changing everything. Those of us who remained, well we went into hiding, built tunnels to survive. And we searched for the Piece of Resistance, the only thing that can stop the Kragle.
Emmet Brickowoski: The Kragle, I know that. I mean, that cop, well he said something about the Kragle, President Business was going to use the Kragle to end the world in three days. I can’t make any sense of it.
[suddenly Wyldstyle realizes something]
Wyldstyle: Taco Tuesday! I knew that was suspicious. There’s no time to lose, we must find Vitruvius and get to the Office Tower before it’s too late!
[she starts rushing off]
Emmet Brickowoski: Okay. How scary can someone’s office be?
[at President Business’ Office which is located at the very top of Octan office tower, Emmet’s face is plastered on all the monitors as the robots try to find him]
Robot #1: President Business, we’re trying to locate the fugitive, but his face is so generic it matches every other face in our database.
President Business: Diabolical. Okay, have Bad Cop meet me in my office in…twenty three seconds.
Robot #1: Will do, sir.
President Business: Chow.
Robot #2: Coffee sales are up, sir.
President Business: Glad to hear it. Let’s rebuild that roof to be even higher.
Robot #3: Roof building, we’re on it!
Robot #4: Sir, can you approve this poster for Taco Tuesday?
President Business: Perfect. Wooh! I love everyone on this room.
Robots: We love you, sir!
[going through to the radio station where the song “Everything is Awesome” is being played]
President Business: Hey, guys. Great job on the radio station.
Robot DJ’s: Thank you, sir. We love listening to this song over and over again.
President Business: Keep it up, guys.
[in the TV station we see the actors for the show “Where Are My Pants?”]
Actor on TV Show: Honey? Where are my pants?
[the audience laughs]
Director: And cut!
[going over to the actors]
President Business: Hilarious. That never gets old.
Actor on TV Show: It does not.
Robot: Bad Cop is waiting for you in your office.
President Business: Wonderful, fantastic. Would you cancel my two o’clock, this next meeting could run a little bit…deadly.
[President Business changes into his Lord Business outfit with his giant iron legs]
Computer: Activate component. Light sequence. Flame test. Engage dramatic entrance.
[suddenly Lord Business enters his office is a cloud of smoke]
Lord Business: Bad Cop.
[Bad Cop backs away in fear as Lord Business approaches him]
Bad Cop: Lord Business, I know the Special got away. But…
Lord Business: Don’t be so serious. Where’s the other guy?
[Bad Cop face turns to Good Cop]
Good Cop: Hey, hey!
Lord Business: Hey, buddy. I missed you.
Good Cop: Oh, did you really?
Lord Business: Have I ever shown you my relic collection?
Good Cop: Nope, I don’t think you have.
Lord Business: Nobody knows where this stuff comes from.
[he shows Good Cop a giant Band-Aid]
Lord Business: This one is the cloak of Band-Aid. I hear it’s super painful to take off. You wanna try it on?
Good Cop: Well, uh…
[suddenly Bad Cop appears]
Bad Cop: No, but thank you.
Lord Business: We’ve done some great work over the years together, Bad Cop. Capturing all those Master Builders and torturing them and what not.
Bad Cop: Thank you, sir.
Lord Business: Although, you did let the Piece of Resistance go. The one thing that can ruin my plans, the one thing that I asked you to take care of.
[he comes over to Bab Cop and puts one arm around his shoulder]
Lord Business: That’s super frustrating. It makes me just wanna pick up whoever’s standing closest to me and just throw them this window, and out into the infinite abyss!
[he picks up Bad Cop takes him to the large glass window and bangs his head against it]
Lord Business: I wanna do it so bad.
Bad Cop: I know you do, sir. But please, please don’t.
[he throws Bad Cop aside]
Lord Business: And it’s not just you, Bad Cop, that keeps messing up my plans. People everywhere are always messing with my stuff. But I have a way to fix that. A way to keep things exactly the way they are supposed to be…permanently.
[Lord Business turns on his TV monitor which shows his robots carrying the box containing the Kragle]
Lord Business: Behold the most powerful weapon of all the relics.
[his robots open the box containing the Kragle and take it out]
Lord Business: The Kragle!
[we see the Kragle is in fact an old tube of Krazy Glue]
Lord Business: As you can see they’re loading the Kragle into a machine upstairs. I call it “The Tentacle Arm Kragle Outside Sprayer”, or TAKO! The S is silent. So on Taco Tuesday it’s going to spray the Kragle over everyone and everything with a bunch of super scary nozzles, like this one.
[the tentacle reaches out and comes over to Bad Cop]
Lord Business: I’ll show you how it works.
Bad Cop: Sir, I don’t know if this is necessary.
Lord Business: Oh, don’t worry. I won’t test it on you. I’ll do it on your parents.
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