Starring: Nicholas Hoult, Nicolas Cage, Awkwafina, Ben Schwartz, Adrian Martinez, Shohreh Aghdashloo, Bess Rous
OUR RATING: ★★★☆☆
Story:
Horror comedy directed by Chris McKay. Renfield (2023) centers on Renfield (Nicholas Hoult), the tortured aide to history’s most narcissistic boss, Dracula (Nicolas Cage), who decides to leave his centuries-long line of work as a henchman and finds a new lease on life in modern day New Orleans when he falls in love with a feisty, but perennially aggressive traffic cop named Rebecca Quincy (Awkwafina).
Best Quotes
Renfield: [whilst he’s at a support group meeting] Hello. My name is Robert Montague Renfield. And just like all these decent folks, I am in a destructive relationship.
Dracula: Mr. Renfield, I bid you welcome. I am Dracula.
Renfield: When I met him, I was a real estate lawyer hoping to make a deal that would change my life and my family’s lives forever. Oh, and it most certainly did.
Renfield: And then he made me his familiar. Which means that I take care of Master’s every need. Including staff changes, and arranging his special dietary requirements.
Renfield: Look, I didn’t just jump into serving the Prince of Darkness. We had some great times. But just like all great times, they come to an end.
Renfield: Dracula’s powers come from consuming human life. Mine come from eating bugs.
Dracula: I am your only salvation. I am your only friend. I am the only one who cares for you.
Renfield: I actually remember thinking, “He really, really means it this time.”
Renfield: At the peak of his powers, Dracula goes on a full-tilt blood-sucking bender, the good guys show up and do their thing, and then it’s up to me to clean up the mess. It’s what I call our transitional period. So I take him to a new city, nurse him back to full power, find a decent place to ride it out until the whole cycle starts all over again.
Support Group: I am enough, and I have enough. I deserve happiness. I am grateful for all that I am. And I take full charge of my life today.
Renfield: They can repeat these affirmations all they want. It’ll never make their problems go away. But I can.
Renfield: Now, no one’s ever going to call me a hero, but I’ve come up with a mutually beneficial solution for people like Caitlyn, get rid of their monsters by giving mine what he needs.
'It is important for you to remember that the only person who can save us is ourselves.' - Mark (Renfield) Share on X
Renfield: I am something much, much worse. I’m a friend of Caitlyn.
Dracula: Fetch me the hand.
Renfield: Yes. Right away. There you go. A little amuse-bouche. Palate cleanser.
Dracula: What is this?
Renfield: That’s Doug, I believe.
Dracula: Doug is trash! You’re feeding me trash!
Dracula: You know, I don’t ask for much, Renfield. Just the blood of a few dozen innocent people.
Dracula: I want happy couples, unsuspecting tourists, a handful of nuns, a busload of cheerleaders.
Renfield: A busload of cheerleaders?
Dracula: A busload of cheerleaders will get me back to full power like that.
'Success really is the best revenge.' - Bellafrancesca Lobo (Renfield) Share on X
Dracula: [to Renfield] It must be difficult to be caught between their rules and mine. Their rules offer a confusing tangle of morality, whereas mine are very simple. You can kill and eat whatever you want and never die. And it truly is a gift. And yet, you seem to think it makes you some sort of a monster. Do you have any idea how inconsiderate that is? My needs are the only thing that matters, servant.
Renfield: I suppose this is what you’d call my health-care plan. His blood has the power to heal the injured. And there’s not even a copay. Unless you consider my soul.
Rebecca: He was running from something, sir. And then he crashed into a DUI checkpoint, committed ten felonies, and not to mention eff-you-ing a room full of cops.
Kyle: You eff-you me all the time.
Rebecca: F*** you, Kyle!
Chris: [referring to the bar] You think you’ll get answers here?
Rebecca: I think we’ll get dinner. Maybe answers for dessert.
'You're not a hero. You're not even a villain. You're just a guy that kills random people.' - Rebecca (Renfield) Share on X
Renfield: [referring to Lobo] That was amazing. You were amazing. What you did. You stood up to him. How did you do that?
Rebecca: What kind of life would I lead under the thumb of one of those a**holes?
Renfield: A very sad one.
Rebecca: Did I watch you cut a guy’s arms off with a decorative serving platter?
Renfield: Oh, yeah. That was adrenaline.
Rebecca: It was awesome.
Rebecca: Are you from around here, or…
Renfield: Oh, no. I’m everywhere.
Rebecca: Ah, military. That would explain all the moves.
Renfield: Yeah, but forever ago. The Great War. Iraq. Maybe not great, you know, but overall pretty good. Three out of five stars.
Rebecca: You must really not be from around here, because we certainly don’t see your kind very often.
Renfield: I’m sorry, what kind is that?
Rebecca: Heroes.
Renfield: Ah, f***. Do you think it’s too late to grab one of those nuns?
'You want to be a hero, you have to risk everything.' - Rebecca (Renfield) Share on X
Dracula: What have I been doing all these years? I mean, look at me, lurking in the shadows and filth like some kind of a diseased animal. You said it yourself, I deserve better. So, why am I not embracing what I truly am?
Renfield: Which is?
Dracula: A god, Renfield. An immortal, insatiable, all-powerful being.
Dracula: Everything you said about the modern world is true. It is a dangerous place. Only not for us. For them, it’s a dangerous, sad, broken place full of fear and desperation. It’s weak. Longing for a powerful force to guide it, control it, dominate it. Like you. I mean, this entire society was designed by Renfields, for Renfields. So, why should I have to adapt to it? It should have to adapt to me.
Dracula: We’re in this together, Dracula and Renfield. From now on, humanity will no longer be divided by the good and the evil, only by followers, and food. You and I forever, until the end of time.
Carol: How is my life? My life is like a never-ending hallway of fun house mirrors, but all the clowns are me.
Mark: Are you okay?
Renfield: No. I need to get out of a toxic relationship.
Renfield: My boss, he’s pretty delusional, I think. He thinks he can take over the world.
Mark: He’s a narcissist, Renfield. We all know exactly how you feel.
Sharon: You can’t get him out of your head.
Renfield: No.
Trevante: Ooh, and you feel like he could kill you with the snap of his fingers.
Renfield: Yes. Wouldn’t even need to snap.
Weird Kevin: He controls rats with his mind.
Mark: It’s okay. It’s okay. He’s on medication.
Mark: But if you were to stop focusing on his needs, what would happen? Yeah. What would happen? Stop focusing on his needs. What would happen?
Renfield: He won’t grow to full power.
Mark: Exactly. He won’t grow to full power. What? That’s so weird! Why would you phrase it like that? But, yes. He’s right.
Renfield: Robert Montague Renfield, yes, at your service.
Rebecca: You look different.
Renfield: Oh.
Rebecca: Good different. I really like your sweater.
Renfield: Oh, thank you. I went to Macy’s.
Renfield: [to Rebecca] I’m here to give my witness statement.
Chris: You always bring flowers to give a witness statement?
Kyle: [referring to Renfield] Rebecca, is this your boyfriend?
Rebecca: Shut the f*** up, Kyle!
Renfield: [to Rebecca] You stood up for everyone who’s ever lived in fear of the powerful forces shaping their lives. Okay? And you need to keep doing that, because when people like you stop standing up to people like them, that’s when the monsters take over. So, you are not lost. You’re an inspiration.
Tedward Lobo: Do you know who the f*** I am? I’m Teddy f***ing Lobo.
Dracula: I am Count Dracula.
Tedward Lobo: You win.
Dracula: Who are you? You were sent by the church?
Tedward Lobo: Church? No. What are you f***ing talking about? I’m a criminal. My whole organization is about evil.
Tedward Lobo: [referring to Renfield] So, what is he, your f***ing roommate?
Dracula: He’s my servant!
Tedward Lobo: He doesn’t seem to be serving you very well.
Renfield: I’m sorry, Master. I never meant to hurt you.
Dracula: Hurt me? Are you actually suggesting that anything you could do would hurt me?!
Dracula: I was wrong about you. I should’ve realized what you were capable of when you were so eager to join me.
Renfield: I don’t think I was eager. I think that you caught me at a low moment, and you maybe manipulated me too. And you just caught me at a low moment and you used some of your power.
Dracula: No, no, no, no, no, no. No!
Dracula: [to Renfield] You’re the one who used me! You used my power because you’re a husk. An empty void that nothing can fill. The only thing that gave your life any meaning was my power. The power you used to bring me victims while you pretended to be one yourself. However, I’m the real victim here! I am the one you swore to protect! And you abandoned me!
Dracula: You’re the monster, Renfield, not me. It’s you.
Renfield: I will no longer tolerate abuse. Stop laughing. I deserve love. I deserve happiness.
Dracula: You deserve only suffering!
Dracula: [to Renfield] I will find everyone you have ever loved, and I will drain them.
Rebecca: How do you two know each other?
Karla: From this support group thing. For people addicted to a**holes. A**holes Anonymous.
Mark: Would you like to introduce yourself to the group?
Dracula: I’m the Prince of Wallachia. Some call me the Dark One. Others, the Lord of Death. However, to most, I am known simply as…
Trevante: Renfield’s boss!
Dracula: I am Dracula.
Mark: Okay. Obviously we’re dealing with a little bit more than just narcissism here.
Renfield: Master, please. These are good people.
Dracula: Good. You’ve finally brought me what I’ve been asking for. Let’s eat.
[he starts killing the support group members]
Dracula: There are some experiences worse than death, Renfield. Such as spending the remaining years of your miserable life knowing all the depravity you’ve witnessed in the last century will be nothing compared to the suffering I’m going to unleash on this world. The world you chose over mine. When I’m finished, the entire human race, everyone you care about, will suffer. Because you betrayed me.
Renfield: [after Dracula kills the support group members] I destroyed everything. I thought I could save these people by bringing Dracula all of their monsters. But what I’ve really done is deliver my monster right to them.
Dracula: Whatever pain Renfield caused you, I will return ten thousand fold. I will unleash an army of death whilst warming my skin next to mountains of burning corpses. How does that sound to you?
Tedward Lobo: It sounds like you got to meet my mom.
Renfield: Snickerdoodle?
Rebecca: I don’t want your murder cookies.
Renfield: They’re just regular cookies.
Rebecca: Well, I don’t know what “regular cookies” means to a murderer.
Renfield: I don’t really know that either.
Rebecca: Give me the murder cookie. Just not the one that looks like s**t.
Renfield: I don’t know which one you think looks like s**t.
Renfield: I’m not saying we need to be friends, but you’re in a lot of s**t right now. And there’s a very good chance I might be the only person you can actually trust.
Rebecca: The fact that you are the only person that I can trust just proves that I am monumentally f***ed.
Rebecca: Dracula?
Renfield: Dracula.
Rebecca: Count Dracula?
Renfield: No. No. President Dracula.
Rebecca: Like you get Dracula people to eat?
Renfield: I do other stuff too.
Rebecca: Like what? Wash his cape?
Renfield: No. It’s dry-clean only.
Rebecca: [to Renfield] I cannot believe I bought into your bulls**t. You’re not a hero. You’re not even a villain. You’re just a guy that kills random people.
Ant Kid’s Mom: [as Renfield is eating her kid’s pet ants] You’re a bad man, Mr. Renfield!
Renfield: Yeah, well, sometimes that comes in handy.
Rebecca: [to Renfield] You know when something crazy happens, and someone’s like, “I’m so sorry you had to see that”? And the other person’s like, “It’s okay. I’ve seen way worse”? Everything I saw you do today is going to be my “way worse”.
Renfield: You know, that’s his greatest power. He looks into your eyes and finds what you think you need to make your life whole. Your dreams, and your desires, and your greed. Your shame. I blamed him for forcing me to abandon my family. But that’s not true. I wanted all those things, and I chose to follow him. I’m not a victim. I made all those mistakes on my own.
Rebecca: [to Renfield] Look, I don’t think you’re such a bad guy. Life throws a lot of s**t at you. But sometimes you fall under the thrall of a vampire for a few decades, and sometimes you call your sister an unbearable twat at Grandma’s birthday party.
Rebecca: You want to be a hero, Renfield? You have to risk everything. And as someone that cares about you, you’re never really going to be free until you face him.
Renfield: Alright, if we’re going to do this, we need to prepare, and we need to do it before sunset.
Rebecca: I’m ready to do it before lunch.
Rebecca: [as Renfield is eating insects] Can you maybe save that for later?
Renfield: Oh, sorry.
Rebecca: It’s all in…
Renfield: Is it in my teeth?
Rebecca: It is in every tooth.
Tedward Lobo: [to Renfield] Wait a second. Don’t I know you? Because you look so familiar.
Tedward Lobo: I’m clearly the yin to your yang.
Renfield: We’ve barely met twice.
Tedward Lobo: You patronizing piece of s**t!
Tedward Lobo: Having Dracula powers is f***ing amazing.
Renfield: Stop saying “Dracula powers”.
Tedward Lobo: Fine. What do you call it?
Renfield: It’s a curse.
Tedward Lobo: God, you’re such a f***ing drama queen.
Rebecca: [to Renfield, referring to Dracula] You were wrong about him. He’s not a monster. He wants to be better, like you. Maybe I can help. In all the darkness, I can find the light.
Dracula: Congratulations. You shot my foot.
Rebecca: Your foot still bleeds.
Dracula: I am the dark poetry in the hearts of all mankind.
Dracula: Do you know what you are?
Renfield: Yes, I do. I’m Robert Montague Renfield, and I’m a codependent.
Renfield: You’re right. You didn’t have to use your power to make me your servant, because I gave all my power to you. And I can take it back. I am enough! And I have enough! And I am capable of change! Because I love myself. I am taking full charge of my life today! Look into my eyes, Dracula. Full power, m**herf***er.
Renfield: [as Dracula is trapped] Is that a protection circle?
Rebecca: I got the instructions off a Wiccan Tumblr.
Renfield: Oh. And that?
Rebecca: Cocaine.
Renfield: Really?
Rebecca: Yeah. I guess any kind of powder works as long as you say the right magic words.
Renfield: Wow. Thank you, Wiccan Tumblr.
Renfield: Any last wishes?
Dracula: I wish to spend a season in hell, where all the amusing people are. Hail Satan!
Renfield: [as he and Rebecca are beating Dracula to a pulp] Yes, I know this looks extreme, and maybe a little fun. But to our defense, there is so much folklore out there about how to actually kill a vampire, it gets confusing. You know, I’ve personally seen him come back from some crazy s**t. So why not try everything? You know, I’m not even a hundred percent sure this will kill him. But I do know it will take him a long, long time to come back from.
Rebecca: It’s never too late to be a hero.
Mark: [to Renfield, at the support group meeting] And thank you for using Dracula blood to bring us all back to life. You know, if it wasn’t for you, none of us would have learned what it’s like to come back from the other side, having seen things that you can’t unsee. And know things that you can’t unknow.
Renfield: My name is Robert Montague Renfield, and I’m a codependent. But I no longer feel like a victim, because I’ve finally faced my demons. You might also say I chopped my demons up into tiny little pieces, encased them in concrete, and flushed them down the drain. And if I can find the power to do that, then maybe everyone can. Metaphorically speaking.
Trailer: