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Home / Movie Quotes / The Social Network Quotes – ‘I invented Facebook.’

The Social Network Quotes – ‘I invented Facebook.’

by MovieQuotesandMore.com

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Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Andrew Garfield, Justin Timberlake, Armie Hammer, Rooney Mara, Bryan Barter, Brenda Song, Joseph Mazzello, Patrick Mapel, Max Minghella, Barry Livingston, John Getz, Rashida Jones, Dakota Johnson, Douglas Urbanski

OUR RATING: ★★★★☆

Story:

Bio-drama directed by David Fincher based on the book “The Accidental Billionaires” adapted by Aaron Sorkin. The story follows Harvard undergrad and computer genius Mark Zuckerberg (Jesse Eisenberg), who in 2003 begins work on a new concept that eventually turns into the global social network known as Facebook. Six years later, he is one of the youngest billionaires ever, but Zuckerberg finds that his unprecedented success leads to both personal and legal complications when he ends up on the receiving end of two lawsuits, one involving his former friend Eduardo Saverin (Andrew Garfield).

 

Best Quotes   (Total Quotes: 179)


 

[first lines]
Mark Zuckerberg: Did you know that there are more people with genius IQ’s living in China than there are people of any kind living in the United States?
Erica Albright: That can’t possibly be true. What would account for that?
Mark Zuckerberg: Well, first of all a lot of people live in China. But here’s my question, how do you distinguish yourself from a population of people who all got sixteen hundred on their SAT’s?
Erica Albright: I didn’t know they take SAT’s in China.
Mark Zuckerberg: They don’t. I wasn’t talking about China anymore, I was talking about me.
Erica Albright: You got sixteen hundred?


 

Mark Zuckerberg: Would you like to talk about something else?
Erica Albright: No. It’s just since the beginning of the conversation about finals club I think I may have missed a birthday. There are really more people in China with genius IQ’s than the entire population…?
Mark Zuckerberg: The Phoenix is the most diverse. The Fly club, Roosevelt punched the Porc.
Erica Albright: Which one?
Mark Zuckerberg: The Porcellian, the Porc, it’s the best of the best.
Erica Albright: Which Roosevelt?
Mark Zuckerberg: Theodore.


 

Erica Albright: Okay, well, which is the easiest to get into?
Mark Zuckerberg: Why would you ask me that?
Erica Albright: I’m just asking.
Mark Zuckerberg: None of them. That’s the point. My friend Eduardo made three hundred thousand dollars betting oil futures one summer and Eduardo won’t come close to getting in. And the ability to make money doesn’t impress anybody around here.
Erica Albright: Must be nice. He made three hundred thousand dollars in a summer.
Mark Zuckerberg: He likes meteorology.
Erica Albright: You said it was oil futures.
Mark Zuckerberg: You can read the weather, you can predict the price of heating oil. I think that you asked me that because you think the final club that’s easiest to get into is the one where I’ll have the best chance.
Erica Albright: I, what?


 

Erica Albright: The one that’s the easiest to get into would be the one where anybody has the best chance.
Mark Zuckerberg: You didn’t ask me which one was the best one. You asked me which one was the easiest one.
Erica Albright: I was honestly just asking, okay. I was just asking to ask. Mark, I’m not speaking in code.
Mark Zuckerberg: Erica…
Erica Albright: You’re obsessed with finals clubs. You have finals clubs OCD. You need to see someone about who’ll prescribe some sort of medication. You don’t care if the side effects may include blindness.
Mark Zuckerberg: Final clubs. Not finals clubs. And there’s a difference between being obsessed and being motivated.
Erica Albright: Yes, there is.
Mark Zuckerberg: Well you do. That was cryptic, so you do speak in code.
Erica Albright: I didn’t mean to be cryptic.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: I’m just saying I need to do something substantial in order to get the attention of the clubs.
Erica Albright: Why?
Mark Zuckerberg: Because they’re exclusive. And fun and they lead to a better life.
Erica Albright: Teddy Roosevelt didn’t get elected president because he was the member of the Phoenix Club.
Mark Zuckerberg: He was a member of the Porcellian and yes he did.
Erica Albright: Why don’t you just concentrate on being the best you, you can be.
Mark Zuckerberg: Did you really just say that?
Erica Albright: I was kidding.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: I’m going to be straight forward with you and tell you I think that you might want to be a little more supportive. If I get in I will be taking you to the events and the gatherings and you’ll be meeting a lot of people you wouldn’t normally get to meet.
Erica Albright: You would do that for me?
Mark Zuckerberg: We’re dating.
Erica Albright: Okay. Well, I want to try and be straight forward with you and let you know that we’re not anymore.
Mark Zuckerberg: What d..?
Erica Albright: We’re not dating anymore. I’m sorry.
Mark Zuckerberg: Is this a joke?
Erica Albright: No, it’s not.
Mark Zuckerberg: You’re breaking up with me?
Erica Albright: You’re going to introduce me to people I wouldn’t normally have the chance to meet. What the f…? What is that supposed to mean?
Mark Zuckerberg: Wait, settle down.
Erica Albright: What is it supposed to mean?
Mark Zuckerberg: Erica, the reason we’re able to sit here and drink right now is because you used to sleep with the door guy.


 

Erica Albright: The door guy, his name is Bobby. I have not slept with the door guy. The door guy is a friend of mine and he’s a perfectly good class of people. And what part of Long Island are you from? Wimbledon?


 

Mark Zuckerberg: Is this real?
Erica Albright: Yes.
Mark Zuckerberg: Okay, then wait. I apologize, okay.
Erica Albright: I have to go study.
Mark Zuckerberg: Erica…
Erica Albright: Yes.
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m sorry. I mean it.
Erica Albright: I appreciate that but I have to go…
Mark Zuckerberg: Come on. You don’t have to study, you don’t have to study. Let’s just talk.
Erica Albright: I can’t.
Mark Zuckerberg: Why?
Erica Albright: Because it is exhausting. Dating you is like dating a stairmaster.


 

Erica Albright: I have to go study.
Mark Zuckerberg: You don’t have to study.
Erica Albright: Why do you keep saying I don’t have to study.
Mark Zuckerberg: Because you go to BU. Do you want to get some food?
Erica Albright: I’m sorry you’re not sufficiently impressed with my education
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m sorry I don’t have a rowboat. So we’re even.
Erica Albright: I think we should just be friends.
Mark Zuckerberg: I don’t want friends.
Erica Albright: I was just being polite. I have no intention of being friends with you.


 

[Erica takes Mark hand and looks straight at him]
Erica Albright: Look, you are probably going to be a very successful computer person. But you’re going to go through life thinking that girls don’t like you because you’re a nerd. And I want you to know from the bottom of my heart that that won’t be true. It’ll be because you’re an asshole.
[Erica gets up and walks off]


 

[Mark is writing a post on his blog]
Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] Erica Albright’s a bitch. You think that’s because her family changed their name from Albrecht or do you think it’s because all BU girls are bitches? For the record she may look like a 34C, but she’s getting all kinds of help from our friends at Victoria’s Secret. She’s a 34B, as in barely anything there. False advertising.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] The truth is she has a nice face. I need to do something to take my mind off her. Easy enough, except I need an idea.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] I’m a little intoxicated. I’m not going to lie. So what, it’s not even 10 p.m. and it’s a Tuesday night. The Kirkland Facebook is open on my desktop and some of these people have pretty horrendous Facebook pics. Billy Olsen, sitting here, had the idea of putting some of the pictures next to pictures of farm animals and have people vote on whose hotter. Good call, Mr. Olsen.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] Yeah, it’s on. I’m not going to do the farm animals but I like the idea of comparing two people together. It gives the whole thing a very ‘Turing’ feel since people’s ratings of the pictures will be more implicit, than say, choosing a number to represent each person’s hotness like they do on hotornot.com.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] The first thing we’re going to need is a lot of pictures. Unfortunately, Harvard doesn’t keep a public centralized Facebook so I’m going to have get all the images from the individual houses that people are in. Let the hacking begin.


 

[Mark continues writing his blog]
Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] First up is Kirkland. They keep everything open and allow indexes in their Apache configuration, so a little w-get magic is all that’s necessary to download the entire Kirkland Facebook. Kids’ stuff.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] Next is Eliot. They’re also open, but with no indexes on Apache. I can run an empty search and it returns all of the images in the database in a single page. Then I can save the page and Mozilla will save all the images for me. Excellent. Moving right along.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] Lowell has some security, they require a username/password combo and I’m going to go ahead and say they don’t have access to the main F.A.S user database. So they have no way of detecting an intrusion.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] Adams has no security but limits the number of results to twenty a page. All I need to do is break out the same script I just used on Lowell and we’re set.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] Quincy has no online Facebook. What a sham. Nothing I can do about that.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] Dunster is intense. Not only is there no public directory but there’s no directory at all. You have to do searches and your search returns more than twenty matches, nothing gets returned. And once you do get results they don’t link directly to the images, they link to a PHP that redirects or something. Weird. This may be difficult, I’ll come back later.


 

Eduardo Saverin: Hey, what’s going on?
Mark Zuckerberg: [voice over] Perfect timing. Eduardo’s here and he’s going to have the key ingredient.


 

Eduardo Saverin: Hey, Mark.
Mark Zuckerberg: Wardo.
Eduardo Saverin: You guy’s split up?
Mark Zuckerberg: How did you know that?
Eduardo Saverin: It’s on your blog.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Eduardo Saverin: Are you all right?
Mark Zuckerberg: I need you.
Eduardo Saverin: I’m here for you.
Mark Zuckerberg: No I need the algorithm you used to rank chess players.


 

Eduardo Saverin: Are you okay?
Mark Zuckerberg: We’re ranking girls.
Eduardo Saverin: You mean other students.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Eduardo Saverin: You think this is such a good idea.
Mark Zuckerberg: I need the algorithm. I need the algorithm.


 

[referring to the picture ranking Facebook they’ve just created]
Eduardo Saverin: Who are you going to to send it to?
Mark Zuckerberg: Ah, just a couple of people. The question is, who are they going to send it to.


 

Erica’s Roommate: Oh shit! Albright? He blogged about you. You don’t want to read it.


 

[looking at the hits they’re getting on the picture ranking Facebook]
Eduardo Saverin: That’s an awful lot of traffic. Maybe you shouldn’t shut it down before you get into trouble.


 

[Mark’s computer suddenly freezes]
Eduardo Saverin: You don’t think…
Mark Zuckerberg: I do.
Eduardo Saverin: Go see if it’s everybody.


 

[referring to the network being shut down]
Eduardo Saverin: Unless it’s a coincidence, I think this is us.
Mark Zuckerberg: It’s not a coincidence.
Eduardo Saverin: Holy shit!


 

[Mark and Eduardo are sitting in a deposition room with their lawyers]
Sy: Why don’ we stretch our legs for a minute. Can we do that? It’s been almost three hours and frankly you did spend an awful lot of time embarrassing Mr. Zuckerberg with the girls testimony from the bar.
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m not embarrassed. She just made a lot of that up.
Gretchen: She was under oath.
Mark Zuckerberg: Then I guess that would be the first time somebody’s lied under oath.


 

Marylin Delpy: The site got twenty-two hundred hits within two hours?
Mark Zuckerberg: Thousand.
Marylin Delpy: What?
Mark Zuckerberg: Twenty-two thousand.
Marylin Delpy: [under her breath] Wow!


 

Divya Narendra: You guys hear about this?
Cameron Winklevoss: What?
Divya Narendra: Two nights ago a sophomore choked the network from a laptop in Kirkland.
Cameron Winklevoss: Really.
Divya Narendra: At 4 a.m.
Cameron Winklevoss: How?
Divya Narendra: He set up a website where you vote on the hotness of female undergrads. What were we doing that none of us heard about this?


 

Cameron Winklevoss: How much activity was there on this thing?
[reading from the paper]
Tyler Winklevoss: Twenty-two thousand page requests.
Cameron Winklevoss: Twenty-two thousand?
Tyler Winklevoss: Cam, this guy hacked into Facebook of seven houses. He set up a whole website in one night. He did it while he was drunk.
Cameron Winklevoss: Twenty-two thousand. How did you know he was drunk?
Divya Narendra: He was blogging simultaneously. Know what I think?
Tyler Winklevoss: I’m way ahead of you.
Divya Narendra: This is our guy.


 

Ad Board Chairwoman: Mr. Zuckerberg, this is an Administrative Board hearing. You’re being accused of intentionally breaching security, violating copyrights, violating individual privacy by creating the website, www.facemash.com. You’re also charged with being in violation of the University’s policy on distribution of digitized images. Before we begin with our questioning you’re allowed to make a statement. Would you like to do so?
Mark Zuckerberg: I’ve…
[Mark stands up to make his statement]
Mark Zuckerberg: You know I’ve already apologized in the Crimson to the ABHW, to Fuerza Latina and to any women at Harvard who may have been insulted as I take it that they were. As for any charges stemming from the breach of security, I believe I deserve some recognition from this Board.
Ad Board Chairwoman: I’m sorry?
Mark Zuckerberg: Yes.
Ad Board Chairwoman: I don’t understand.
Mark Zuckerberg: Which part?
Ad Board Chairwoman: You deserve recognition?
Mark Zuckerberg: I believe I pointed out some pretty gaping holes in your system.


 

Mr. Cox: Mr. Zuckerberg, I’m in charge of security for all computers on the Harvard network and I can assure you of its sophistication. In fact it was that level of sophistication that led us to you in less than four hours.
Mark Zuckerberg: Four hours?
Mr. Cox: Yes.
Mark Zuckerberg: That would be impressive except if you had known what you were looking for you would have seen it written on my dorm room window.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: Six months academic probation.
Eduardo Saverin: Well, they had to make an example out of you.
Mark Zuckerberg: They have my blog. I shouldn’t have written that thing about the farm animals. That was stupid. But I was kidding for gods sakes. Doesn’t anybody have a sense of humor?
Eduardo Saverin: I tried to stop you.
Mark Zuckerberg: I know.
Eduardo Saverin: How do you do this thing where you manage to get all the girls to hate us and why do I let you?
Mark Zuckerberg: I know.
Eduardo Saverin: I can’t do that.
Mark Zuckerberg: Wardo, I said I know.


 

Cameron Winklevoss: You Mark Zuckerberg?
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Cameron Winklevoss: Cameron Winklevoss.
Mark Zuckerberg: Hi.
Tyler Winklevoss: Tyler Winklevoss.
Mark Zuckerberg: Are you guys related?
Cameron Winklevoss: That’s good.
Tyler Winklevoss: Funny.
Cameron Winklevoss: We’ve never heard that before.
Mark Zuckerberg: So what can I do for you? Did I insult your girlfriends?
Cameron Winklevoss: No, you didn’t. Actually, I don’t know.
Tyler Winklevoss: We never asked.
Cameron Winklevoss: Yeah, we should do that.


 

Tyler Winklevoss: Mark, this is Divya Narendra, our partner.
Mark Zuckerberg: Hi.
Divya Narendra: We were really impressed with Facemash and then we checked you out and you also built CourseMatch.
Tyler Winklevoss: I don’t know CourseMatch.
Divya Narendra: You go online and see what courses your friends are taking. It’s really disarming.
[Mark is distracted looking at the pictures on the wall of the old Porcellian classes]
Divya Narendra: Mark?
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Divya Narendra: We were talking about CourseMatch?
Mark Zuckerberg: That was kind of a no-brainer.


 

Divya Narendra: You invented something in high school right?
Mark Zuckerberg: An app for an MP3 player that recognizes your taste in music.
Divya Narendra: Anybody try to buy it?
Mark Zuckerberg: Microsoft.
Divya Narendra: Wow! How much?
Mark Zuckerberg: Didn’t sell it. I uploaded it for free.
Divya Narendra: For free?
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Divya Narendra: Why?
[Mark just shrugs his shoulders]


 

Cameron Winklevoss: Well, we have something that we’ve been working on for a while and we think it’s great. It’s called the HarvardConnection. You create your own page, interests bio, friends, pics.
Tyler Winklevoss: And then people can go online see you bio request to be…
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah, how is that different from my MySpace or Friendster?
Tyler Winklevoss: Harvard-dot-E-D-U.
Cameron Winklevoss: Harvard.edu is the most prestigious e-mail address in the country.
Tyler Winklevoss: And the whole site kinds based on the idea that girls, uh…
Cameron Winklevoss: Not to put anything indelicately…
Divya Narendra: Girls want to go with guys who go to Harvard.


 

Tyler Winklevoss: The main difference between what we’re talking about and MySpace or Friendster or any of those other social networking sites…
Mark Zuckerberg: …is exclusivity. Right?
Divya Narendra: Right.
Cameron Winklevoss: Yeah. We’d love for you to work for us, Mark. I mean we need a gifted programmer whose creative.


 

Cameron Winklevoss: Uh, we would need you to build the site, write the code and we’ll provide all the…
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m in.
Cameron Winklevoss: What?
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m in.
Tyler Winklevoss: Awesome.


 

[Mar’s at a deposition with Eduardo and both their lawyers]
Gretchen: When did you come to Eduardo with the idea for Facebook?
Mark Zuckerberg: It was called TheFacebook then.


 

[Mark’s at another deposition with Cameron, Tyler and Divya and their lawyers]
Gage: This doesn’t need to be that difficult.
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m currently in the middle of two different law suits.
Gage: Did you answer affirmatively? When Tyler and Cameron Winklevoss and Divya Narendra asked you to build HarvardConnection, did you say yes?
Mark Zuckerberg: I said I’d help.


 

[at the deposition with Eduardo]
Gretchen:
When did you approach Mr. Saverin with the idea for TheFacebook?

Mark Zuckerberg: I wouldn’t say I approached him.
Gretchen: Sy?
Sy: You can answer the question.
Mark Zuckerberg: At a party at Alpha Epsilon Pi.
Gretchen: What’s that?
Mark Zuckerberg: The Jewish fraternity. It was Caribbean Night.


 

[at the Alpha Epsilon Pi Caribbean Night party]
Eduardo Saverin: It’s not that guys like me are generally attracted to Asian girls. It’s that Asian girls are generally attracted to guys like me.
Dustin Moskovitz: I’m developing an algorithm to define the connection between Jewish guys and Asian girls.
Eduardo Saverin: I don’t think it’s that complicated. They’re hot, they’re smart, they’re not Jewish and they can’t dance.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: People came to Facemash in a stampede, right?
Eduardo Saverin: Yeah.
Mark Zuckerberg: But, it wasn’t because the saw pictures of hot girls. You can go anywhere on the internet and see pictures of hot girls.
Eduardo Saverin: Yeah.
Mark Zuckerberg: It was because they saw pictures of girls that they knew. People want to go on the internet and check out their friends, so why not build a website that offers that? Friends, pictures, profiles, whatever you can visit, browse around. Maybe it’s someone you just met at a party. But I’m not talking about a dating site, I’m talking about taking the entire social experience of college and putting it online.


 

[at the deposition Eduardo relaying what Mark had said about his idea of the site]
Eduardo Saverin: It would be exclusive.


 

[back at the Caribbean Night party]
Mark Zuckerberg: You would have to know the people on the site to get past your own page. Like, getting punched.
Eduardo Saverin: Now, that’s good.
Mark Zuckerberg: Wardo, it’s like the Final Club except we’re the president.


 

[speaking at the deposition]
Eduardo Saverin: I told him I thought it sounded great. It was a great idea. There was nothing to hack, people were going to provide their own pictures, their own information. And people had the ability to invite or not to invite their friends to join. See in a world were social structure was everything, that was the thing. It was a big project and he was going to write tens of thousands lines of code. So I wondered why he was coming to me and not his roommates. Dustin Moskovitz and Chris Hughes, they were programmers.


 

[to Eduardo back at the Caribbean Night party ]
Mark Zuckerberg: We’re going to need a little start-up cash to rent the servers and get it online.


 

[at the deposition, referring to when Mark had approached to put up the money for the building the site]
Eduardo Saverin: So that was why.
Gretchen: Did he offer terms?
Eduardo Saverin: Yes.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: We’ll split it seventy-thirty. Seventy for me, thirty for you for putting up the thousand dollars and for handling everything on the business end. You’re CFO.


 

[at the deposition]
Mark Zuckerberg: They’re suggesting I was jealous of Eduardo for getting punched by the Phoenix and began a plan to screw him out of a company I hadn’t even invented yet.
Gretchen: Were you?
Sy: Gretchen…
Mark Zuckerberg: Jealous of Eduardo?
Sy: Stop typing, we’re off the record.
Mark Zuckerberg: Ma’am, I know you’ve done your homework and so you know that money isn’t a big part of my life. But at the moment I could buy them out of Auburn Street, take the Phoenix Club and turn it into my ping pong room.


 

Gage: We recognize that you’re a plaintiff in one suite involving Facebook and a witness in another.
Eduardo Saverin: Yes, sir.
Gage: At any time in the weeks prior to Mark’s telling you his idea, did he mention Tyler Winklevoss, Cameron Winklevoss, Divya Narendra or HarvardConnection.
Eduardo Saverin: Yes, he said they’d asked him to work on their site. But that he looked at what they had and decided it wasn’t worth his time. He said even his most pathetic friends knew more about getting people interested in a website than these guys.
Gage: “These guys” meaning my clients.
Eduardo Saverin: Yes. He resented, Mark resented that they, that your clients thought that he needed to rehabilitate his image after Facemash. Mark didn’t want to rehabilitate anything. With Facemash, he’d hacked into the Harvard computer, he’d thumbed his nose at the Ad Board, he’d gotten a lot of notoriety. Facemash did exactly what he’d wanted it to do.


 

Gage: Were you were that while Mr. Zuckerberg was building TheFacebook he was also communicating with the plaintiffs?
Eduardo Saverin: Not at the time I wasn’t. But it really didn’t have much to do with the Winklevoss’s dating site.
Tyler Winklevoss: How would you know? You weren’t even there!
Gage: Tyler!
[to Eduardo]
Gage: Were you aware that while Mr. Zuckerberg was building TheFacebook he was leading the plaintiffs to believe he was building HarvardConnection?


 

Eduardo Saverin: Hey, guess what?
[he shows Mark the envelope from the Phoenix Club]
Eduardo Saverin: I made the second cut.
Mark Zuckerberg: That’s good. You should be proud of that right there. Don’t worry if you don’t make it any further.


 

[to the group of prospective Phoenix members gathered around a statue of John Harvard]
Phoenix Senior: As the plaque reads, this is John Harvard, founder of Harvard University in 1638. It’s also called the Statue of Three Lies. What are the three lies? Mr. Dowd?
Dowd: The three lies, the first shit!
Phoenix Senior: Take your pants off.
Eduardo Saverin: I know
Phoenix Senior: Ah, Mr. Saverin.
Eduardo Saverin: One; Harvard was founded in 1636, not 1638. Two; Harvard wasn’t founded by John Harvard and three; that is not John Harvard.
Phoenix Senior: Who is it?
Eduardo Saverin: A friend of the sculptor, Daniel Chester.
Phoenix Senior: You can keep your jacket on.


 

[at the deposition with the Winklevoss brothers and Eduardo]
Gage: Thirty nine days after Mr. Zuckerberg’s initial meeting with my clients and he still hadn’t completed work on HarvardConnection. But on January 11, 2004, Mr. Zuckerberg registered the domain name TheFacebook vial Network Solutions.
to Eduardo
Gage: To the best of your knowledge, had he even begun work on HarvardConnection?
Eduardo Saverin: Not to my knowledge. No.


 

Gage: You sent thirty six emails to Mr. Zuckerberg and received sixteen emails in return and this was the first time he indicated he was not happy?
Divya Narendra: That’s correct. He had forty two days to study our system and get out ahead.
Mark Zuckerberg: Do you see any of your code on Facebook?
Gage: Sy could you…
Sy: Mark…
Mark Zuckerberg: Did I use any of your code?
Divya Narendra: You stole our whole goddamn idea!
Sy: Fellas.
Mark Zuckerberg: Match-dot-com for Harvard guys?
Gage: Can I continue with my deposition?
Mark Zuckerberg: You know you really don’t need a damn forensics team to get to the bottom of this. If you guys were the inventors of Facebook you’d have invented Facebook.
Divya Narendra: I can’t wait to stand over your shoulder and watch you write us a check.
Mark Zuckerberg: No shit.


 

[looking at TheFacebook homepage while Mark’s adding more coding]
Eduardo Saverin: Shit. That looks good. That looks really good.
Mark Zuckerberg: It’s clean and simple. No Disneyland no live new girls. Watch.
[Mark types out several more code]
Eduardo Saverin: What’d you write?
Mark Zuckerberg: “Relationship status”. “Interested in”. This is what drives life at college. Are you having sex or aren’t you. It’s why people take certain classes and sit where they sit and do what they do, and it’s, um, center, you know, that’s what TheFacebook is going to be about. People are going to log on because after all the cake and watermelon there’s a chance they’re actually going to…
Eduardo Saverin: …going to get laid.
Mark Zuckerberg: …meet a girl. Yes.
Eduardo Saverin: That is really good.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: It’s ready.
Eduardo Saverin: It’s ready? Right now?
Mark Zuckerberg: That was it. And here’s the masthead.
Eduardo Saverin: You made a masthead.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
[reading from the website’s masthead]
Eduardo Saverin: Eduardo Saverin. Co-Founder and CFO.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Eduardo Saverin: You have no idea what that’s going to mean to my father.
Mark Zuckerberg: Sure I do.
Eduardo Saverin: So, when’s it going live?
Mark Zuckerberg: Right now.


 

[when Eduardo is reluctant to give Mark emails of the Phoenix Club members]
Mark Zuckerberg: These guys know people. And I need their emails.
Eduardo Saverin: Sure.
[he gets out his phone]
Mark Zuckerberg: Good. Give me the mailing list.
Eduardo Saverin: Jabberwock12.listservharvard E-D-U.
Mark Zuckerberg: These guys! They’re literary geniuses because the world’s most obvious Lewis Carroll reference is in there.
Eduardo Saverin: They’re not so bad.
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m just saying.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: The site’s live.
Eduardo Saverin: You know what? Let’s go get a drink and celebrate. I’m buying. Mark?
[Mark doesn’t answer and Eduardo sees him move his head slightly back and forth]
Eduardo Saverin: Mark, are you praying?


 

Divya Narendra: Okay. I just wanted to let you know that Zuckerberg stole our website!
Cameron Winklevoss: Mark Zuckerberg?
Divya Narendra: He stole our website. It’s been live for more than 36 hours.


 

[reading from the University paper]
Divya Narendra: As of yesterday evening Zuckerberg said over six hundred and fifty students have registered to use TheFacebook.com. Said he anticipated that nine hundred students would have joined the site by this morning.
Cameron Winklevoss: [into the phone] Yeah, uh, Divya was just reading that six hundred and fifty students signed up for it on the first day.
Tyler Winklevoss: God, if I was a drug dealer I couldn’t give free drugs to six hundred and fifty people in one day.
Divya Narendra: This guy doesn’t have three friends to rub together to make a fourth.


 

Divya Narendra: This is a good guy?
Cameron Winklevoss: We don’t know that he’s not a good guy.
Divya Narendra: We know he stole our idea, we know he lied to our faces for a month and a half.
Cameron Winklevoss: No, he never lied to our faces.
Divya Narendra: Okay, he never saw our faces. Fine. He lied to our email accounts and he gave himself a forty two day head start, because he knows what apparently you don’t, which is that getting there first is everything.
Cameron Winklevoss: I’m a competitive racer, Div. I don’t think you need to school me on the importance of getting there first. Thank you.


 

Cameron Winklevoss: What, you want to hire an IP lawyer and sue him?
Divya Narendra: No. I want to hire the Sopranos and bit the shit out of him with a hammer!
Tyler Winklevoss: We don’t have to do that.
Cameron Winklevoss: That’s right.
Tyler Winklevoss: We could do that ourselves. I’m six-five, two-twenty and there’s two of me.


 

Divya Narendra: How much more information are you waiting for? We met with Mark three times, we exchanged fifty two emails, we can prove that he looked at the code. And what is that on the bottom of the page?
Cameron Winklevoss: It says “A Mark Zuckerberg Production”.
Divya Narendra: On the homepage?
Tyler Winklevoss: On every page.
Divya Narendra: Shit! I need a second to let the classiness waft over me.


 

[reading from the paper]
Tyler Winklevoss: Cam, they wrote that “Zuckerberg said that he hoped the privacy options would help restore his reputation following student outrage over Facemash.com”. That’s exactly what we said to him. He’s giving us the finger in the Crimson.


 

Cameron Winklevoss: We’re not starting a knife fight in the Crimson and we’re not suing anybody.
Divya Narendra: Why not? I don’t understand. Why not?
[referring to Tyler]
Cameron Winklevoss: He’s going to say it’s stupid.
Tyler Winklevoss: What, from me?
Divya Narendra: Say it. Why not?
Cameron Winklevoss: Because we’re gentlemen of Harvard. This is Harvard, where you don’t plant stories and you don’t sue people.
Divya Narendra: You thought he was going to be the only one who thought that was stupid?


 

[during the deposition; referring to the Winklevoss brothers]
Sy: Did you know that they came from money?
Mark Zuckerberg: I had no idea whether they came from money or not.
Gage: In one of your emails to Mr. Narendra you referenced Howard Winklevoss’ consulting firm.
Mark Zuckerberg: If you say so.


 

Gage: So it’s safe to say you were aware that my clients had money.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yes.
Gage: Let me tell you why I’m asking. I’m wondering why if you needed a thousand dollars for an internet venture you didn’t ask my clients for it. They had demonstrated and interest to you in that kind of thing…
Mark Zuckerberg: I went to my friend for the money because that’s who I wanted to be partners with. Eduardo was the president of the Harvard Investors Association and he was also my best friend.
Gage: Your best friend is suing you for six hundred million dollars.
Mark Zuckerberg: [sarcastically] I didn’t know that, tell me more.


 

[at the deposition with Eduardo and his lawyer]
Sy: Mr. Saverin what happened after the initial launch?
Eduardo Saverin: It exploded.


 

[at the deposition with the Winklevoss brothers]
Divya Narendra: Everyone on campus was using it. “Facebook me” was a common expression after two weeks.
Sy: And, uh, Mark?
Divya Narendra: And Mark was the biggest thing on campus that included nineteen Nobel Laureates, fifteen Pulitzer Prize winners, two future Olympians and a movie star.
Sy: Whose the movie star?
Divya Narendra: Does it matter?
Sy: No.


 

Stuart Singer: I’m Stuart Singer. I’m in your O.S. lab.
Mark Zuckerberg: Sure.
Stuart Singer: Awesome job with TheFacebook.
Vikram: Awesome job.
Mark Zuckerberg: Thanks.
Bob: I’m Bob.
Mark Zuckerberg: How you doing.
Bob: You know, I could swear he was looking at you when he said the next Bill Gates could be right in this room.
Mark Zuckerberg: I doubt it.
Bob: I showed up late, I don’t even know who the speaker was.
Mark Zuckerberg: It was Bill Gates.
Bob: Shit! That makes sense.
Eduardo Saverin: All right. Thanks guys.


 

[as Mark and Eduardo walk off, Stuart and Vikram reproach Bob]
Vikram: Are you a moron?
Stuart Singer: Are you medically stupid?
Vikram: You can’t recognize Bill Gates when he’s standing in front of you for an hour?
Stuart Singer: Mark Zuckerberg now thinks we got into Harvard on dimwit scholarship.
Vikram: If I had a Glock I’d kill you.


 

Eduardo Saverin: I said it’s time to monetize the site.
Mark Zuckerberg: What does that mean?
Eduardo Saverin: I mean it’s time for the website to start generate revenue.
Mark Zuckerberg: No, I know what the word means. I’m asking how do you want to do it?
Eduardo Saverin: Advertising.
Mark Zuckerberg: No.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: Because TheFacebook is cool and if we start installing pop-ups for Mountain Dew it’s not going to be cool…
Eduardo Saverin: Well I wasn’t thinking Mountain Dew, but at some point, and I’m talking as the business end of the company, the site…
Mark Zuckerberg: We don’t even know what it is yet. We don’t know what it is. We don’t know what it can be. We don’t what it will be. We know that it is cool. That is a priceless asset I’m not giving up.


 

Eduardo Saverin: So when will it be finished?
Mark Zuckerberg: It won’t be finished. That’s the point. The way fashion’s never finished.
Eduardo Saverin: What?
Mark Zuckerberg: Fashion, fashion is never finished.
Eduardo Saverin: You’re talking about fashion? Really, you?
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m talking about the idea of it. And I’m saying that it’s never finished.
Eduardo Saverin: Okay. But they manage to make money selling pants.


 

[after Eduardo has found the cease and desist letter sent to Mark from the Divya and the Winklevoss brothers]
Eduardo Saverin: They’re saying that we stole TheFacebook from Divya Narendra and the Winklevoss…
Mark Zuckerberg: I know what it says.
Eduardo Saverin: Did we?
Mark Zuckerberg: Did we what?
Eduardo Saverin: Don’t screw around with me now. Look at me. The letter says we could face legal action.
Mark Zuckerberg: No, it says I could face legal action.


 

[referring to the letter sent by Narendra/Winklevoss brothers]
Eduardo Saverin: Do they have grounds?
Mark Zuckerberg: The grounds are that our thing is cool and popular and HarvardConnection is lame. Wardo, I didn’t use any of their code. I promise, I didn’t use anything. Look, a guy who builds a really chair doesn’t owe money to everyone who ever has built a chair, okay. They came to me with an idea, I had a better one.


 

Eduardo Saverin: If there’s something wrong, it there’s ever anything wrong, you can tell me. I’m the guy that wants to help. This is our thing. Now, is there anything that you need to tell me?
Mark Zuckerberg: No.
Eduardo Saverin: What are we doing about this?
Mark Zuckerberg: I went to a 3-L at student Legal Services and he told me to write them back.
Eduardo Saverin: And what did you say?


 

[reading Mark’s response at the Narendra/Winklevoss deposition]
Gage: When we me in January, I expressed doubts about the site, where it stood with graphics, how much programming was left that I had not anticipated…
[flash back to Eduardo reading from the same letter]
Eduardo Saverin: …the lack of hardware we had to deal with the site used, the lack of promotion that would go on to successfully launch the website
[back at the deposition]
Gage: This was the first time you raised any of those concerns, right?
Mark Zuckerberg: I’d raised concerns before.
Tyler Winklevoss: Bullshit!
Divya Narendra: Not to us.


 

Gage: Let me re-phrase this. You sent my clients sixteen emails, and the first fifteen you didn’t raise any concerns.
Mark Zuckerberg: Is that a question?
Gage: In the sixteenth email you raised concerns about the site’s functionality. Were you leading them on for six week?
Mark Zuckerberg: No.
Gage: Then why didn’t you raise any of these concerns before?
[Mark looks away towards the window]
Mark Zuckerberg: It’s raining.
Gage: I’m sorry?
Mark Zuckerberg: It just started raining.
Gage: Mr. Zuckerberg, do I have your full attention?
Mark Zuckerberg: No.
Gage: Do you think I deserve it?
Mark Zuckerberg: What?
Gage: Do you think I deserve your full attention?
Mark Zuckerberg: I had to swear an oath before we began this deposition and I don’t want to purger myself. So I have a legal obligation to say no.
Gage: Okay, no. You don’t think I deserve your attention.
Mark Zuckerberg: I think if your clients want to sit on my shoulders and call themselves tall they have a right to give it a try. But there’s no requirement that I enjoy sitting here listening to people lie. You have part of my attention, you have the minimum amount. The rest of my attention is back at the offices of Facebook, where my colleagues and I are doing things that no one in this room, including and especially your clients, are intellectually or creatively capable of doing. Did I adequately answer your condescending question?


 

Mark Zuckerberg: Erica?
Erica Albright: Hi.
Mark Zuckerberg: I saw you from over there. I didn’t know you came to this club a lot.
Erica Albright: It’s the first time.
Mark Zuckerberg: Mine too. Could I talk to you alone for a second?
Erica Albright: I think I’m good right here.
Mark Zuckerberg: I just, I’d love to talk to you alone. If we could just go someplace.
Erica Albright: Right here is fine.
Mark Zuckerberg: I don’t know if you heard about this new website I launched.
Erica Albright: No.
Mark Zuckerberg: TheFacebook?
Erica Albright: You called me a bitch on the internet, Mark.
Mark Zuckerberg: That’s why I wanted to talk to you. It we could just…
Erica Albright: On the internet.
Mark Zuckerberg: That’s why I came over.
Erica Albright: Comparing women to farm animal?
Mark Zuckerberg: I didn’t end up doing that.
Erica Albright: It didn’t stop you from writing it. As if every thought that tumbles through your head was so clever, it would be a crime for it not to be shared. The internet is not written in pencil, Mark, it’s written in ink and you published that Erica Albright was a bitch. Right before you made some ignorant crack about my family’s name, my bra size and rated women based on their hotness.


 

Erica Albright: You write your snide bullshit from a dark room because that’s what the angry do nowadays. I was nice to you. Don’t torture me for it.
Mark Zuckerberg: If we could just go somewhere for a minute.
Erica Albright: I don’t want to be rude to my friends.
Mark Zuckerberg: Okay.
Erica Albright: Okay.
[as Mark walks away]
Erica Albright: Good luck with your video game.


 

[in his dorm room holding a meeting with, Eduardo, Dustin, Chris and Christy and Alice]
Mark Zuckerberg: Okay, we are expanding to Yale and Columbia. Dustin, I want you to share the coding work with me. Chris, you’re going to be in charge of publicity and outreach and you can start by getting a story in the B.U. student newspaper. It’s the bridge.
Chris Hughes: They hate doing stories about Harvard.
Mark Zuckerberg: Somebody at the newspaper will be a computer science major. Tell them that Mark Zuckerberg will do ten hours of free programming.
Eduardo Saverin: Why do you want a story in the B.U. newspaper?
Mark Zuckerberg: Because I do.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: Now here’s the arrangement, Eduardo is CFO and owns thirty percent of the company. Dustin is Vice President and head of programming and his five percent of the company will come from my end. Uh, Chris is Director of Publicity and his compensation will depend on the amount of work he ends up doing. Any questions?
Dustin Moskovitz: Who are the girls?
Eduardo Saverin: Sorry, um, Christy and Alice.


 

Christy: Is there anything we can do?
Mark Zuckerberg: No. That’s it. Yale and Columbia, let’s go.
Eduardo Saverin: And Stanford.
Mark Zuckerberg: What?
Eduardo Saverin: Stanford. It’s time for them to see this in Palo Alto.

See more The Social Network Quotes


 

[Mark sitting alone in a conference room working on his laptop]
Marylin Delpy: What are you doing?
Mark Zuckerberg: Checking in to see how it’s going in Bosnia.
Marylin Delpy: Bosnia? They don’t have roads but they have Facebook.
[Mark doesn’t reply but continues typing on his laptop]
Marylin Delpy: You must really hate the Winklesvosses?
Mark Zuckerberg: I don’t hate anybody. The Winklevi aren’t suing me for intellectual property theft. They’re suing me because for the first time in their lives things didn’t work out the way it was supposed to for them.


 

[after finding out that Mark is expanding his website to Yale and Columbia]
Divya Narendra: I want to hire a lawyer to file for injunctive relief and get this site taken down now!
Cameron Winklevoss: Look…
Divya Narendra: Every minute this site is up HarvardConnection becomes less valuable. I want an injunction, I want damages, I want punitive relief and I want him dead.
Cameron Winklevoss: Yeah, I want those things too.
Divya Narendra: Then why aren’t we doing anything about it? Because we’re gentlemen of Harvard?!
Cameron Winklevoss: No, because you’re not thinking how it’s going to look.
Divya Narendra: How’s it going to look?
Cameron Winklevoss: Like my brother and I are in skeleton costumes chasing the Karate Kid around the high school gym.


 

Cameron Winklevoss: There’s no such thing as Harvard Law.
Tyler Winklevoss: Wait, yeah, there is.
[Tyler goes to the bookshelf and gets a book out]
Tyler Winklevoss: Harvard Student Handbook. Every freshman is issued one of these and somewhere in this book it says…
Cameron Winklevoss: …you can’t steal from another student. This is what we needed.


 

Sean Parker: I don’t go to school.
Amelia Ritter: You’re kidding?
Sean Parker: No.
Amelia Ritter: Well, where did you go to school?
Sean Parker: William Taft Elementary, for a little while.
Amelia Ritter: Seriously? You’re not like fifteen years old or anything are you?
Sean Parker: No. Wait, you’re not like fifteen are you?
Amelia Ritter: No. So what do you do?
Sean Parker: I’m an entrepreneur.
Amelia Ritter: You’re unemployed.
Sean Parker: I wouldn’t say that.
Amelia Ritter: What would say?
Sean Parker: That I’m an entrepreneur.


 

Amelia Ritter: Well then, what was your latest entrepreneur?
Sean Parker: Well, I founded an internet company that let folks download and share music for free.
Amelia Ritter: Kind of like Napster?
Sean Parker: Exactly like Napster.
Amelia Ritter: What do you mean?
Sean Parker: I founded Napster.
Amelia Ritter: Sean Parker founded Napster.
Sean Parker: Nice to meet you.


 

Amelia Ritter: I just slept with Sean Parker?
Sean Parker: You just slept ‘on’ Sean Parker.
Amelia Ritter: You’re a zillionaire.
Sean Parker: Not technically.
Amelia Ritter: What are you?
Sean Parker: Broke. There’s not a lot of money in free music. Even less when you’re being sued by everyone who’s ever been to the Grammys.


 

Sean Parker: I went to check my email and there’s a website open on your computer.
Amelia Ritter: Yeah. After you passed out last night I went on TheFacebook for a little bit.
Sean Parker: What’s that?
Amelia Ritter: TheFacebook? Stanford’s had it for like two weeks now. It’s really awesome, except it’s freakishly addictive. Seriously, I’m on the thing like five times a day.
[goes back to the shower]
Sean Parker: Mind if I send myself and email?
Amelia Ritter: Yeah. Is everything okay?
Sean Parker: [to himself] Everything’s great. I just need to find you, Mark Zuckerberg.


 

[waiting to see the President of Harvard]
Cameron Winklevoss: Never been in this building before.
Larry Summers’ Secretary: This building is a hundred years older than the country it’s in. So do be careful.
Tyler Winklevoss: We’re sitting in chairs!


 

[meeting with the President of Harvard, Larry Summers]
Larry Summers: You’re here because? Either of you can answer.
Cameron Winklevoss: Oh, I’m sorry sir. I thought you were reading the letter.
Larry Summers: I’ve read the letter.
Cameron Winklevoss: Well we came up with an idea for a website called HarvardConnection and we’ve since changed the name to ConnectU and Mark Zuckerberg stole that idea…
Larry Summers: I understand and I’m asking what you want me to do about it?
Cameron Winklevoss: Well sir, in the Harvard Student Handbook, which is distributed to each freshman, under the heading “Standards of Conduct in the Harvard Community” it says; “The college expects all students will be honest and forthcoming in their dealings with members in this community. Student are required to respect public and private ownership. And instances of theft, misappropriation or…
Larry Summers: Anne?
Anne: Yes, sir.
Larry Summers: [sarcastically] Punch me in the face.


 

Larry Summers: Have you tried dealing with the other student directly?
Cameron Winklevoss: Mr. Zuckerberg hasn’t been responding to any of our emails or phone calls for the last two weeks. He doesn’t answer when we knock on his door at Kirkland and the closest I’ve come to dealing with him face to face is when I saw him on the quad and chased him through Harvard Square.
Larry Summers: You chased him?
Cameron Winklevoss: I saw him and I know he saw me. I went after him and then he disappeared.


 

Larry Summers: I don’t see this as a University issue.
Tyler Winklevoss: Of course it’s a University issue. There’s a code of ethics and an honor code and he violated both.
Larry Summers: You enter into a code of ethics with the University, not with each other.
Tyler Winklevoss: I’m sorry President Summers, but what you just said makes no sense to me all.
Larry Summers: [sarcastically] I’m devastated by that.


 

Tyler Winklevoss: This idea is potentially worth millions of dollars.
Larry Summers: Millions?
Cameron Winklevoss: Yes.
Larry Summers: You must just be letting your imaginations run away with you.
Tyler Winklevoss: Sir I honestly don’t think you’re in any position to make that call.
Larry Summers: I was the U.S. Treasury Secretary. I’m in some position to make that call.
Tyler Winklevoss: Well, letting our imaginations run away with us is exactly what we were told to do in your freshman address.


 

Larry Summers: Everyone at Harvard is inventing something. Harvard undergraduates believe that inventing a job is better than finding a job. So I suggest again that the two of you come up with a new project.
Cameron Winklevoss: I’m sorry sir, but that’s not the point.
Larry Summers: Please, arrive at the point.
Cameron Winklevoss: You don’t have to be an intellectual property expert to understand the difference between right and wrong.
Larry Summers: And you’re saying that I don’t?
Cameron Winklevoss: Of course I’m not saying that, sir.
Tyler Winklevoss: I’m saying that.


 

Larry Summers: Let me tell you something, Mr. Winklevoss, Mr. Winklevoss, since you’re on the subject of right and wrong. This action, this meeting, the two of you being here is wrong! It’s not worthy of Harvard, it’s not what Harvard saw in you. You don’t get special treatment.
Cameron Winklevoss: We never asked for…
Tyler Winklevoss: Wait, just start another project?
Larry Summers: If you have a…
Tyler Winklevoss: Like we’re making a diorama for the science fair?
Larry Summers: If you have a problem with that Mr. Winklevoss…
Cameron Winklevoss: We never asked for special treatment.
Larry Summers: The courts are always at your disposal. Is there anything else I can do for you?
Tyler Winklevoss: [quietly] Well, you could take the Harvard Student Handbook and shove it…
Cameron Winklevoss: Ty!


 

[as Cameron and Tyler leave Summers office, Tyler closes the door a little too hard and the door knob comes off in hand]
Tyler Winklevoss: Woops! Broke a three hundred and fifty year old door knob.
[drops it on the secretary’s desk]


 

[at the deposition with Eduardo and his lawyer]
Gretchen: At this point your thousand dollars was the only money that had been put into the company.
Eduardo Saverin: Yes.
Gretchen: How did you feel the meetings went?
Eduardo Saverin: They went terribly.
Gretchen: Why?
Eduardo Saverin: Mark was asleep.
Mark Zuckerberg: I was not asleep.
Eduardo Saverin: Can I rephrase my answer?
Gretchen: Um-hmm.
Eduardo Saverin: I wish he’d been asleep.


 

[during a meeting with an ad executive, Mark is making strange noises with his mouth]
Ad Executive: Excuse me for one second. What sound is he making? Is that like a tisk?
Mark Zuckerberg: It wasn’t a tisk. It was…
[makes the noise again with this mouth]
Mark Zuckerberg: …like a glottal stop. Almost a gag reflex.
Ad Executive: Guys, what is this?


 

[waiting to have a meeting with Sean Parker at a restaurant]
Eduardo Saverin: He’s twenty-five minutes late!
Mark Zuckerberg: He invented Napster when he was nineteen. He can be late.
Eduardo Saverin: He’s not a god.
Mark Zuckerberg: What is he?
Eduardo Saverin: He’s twenty-five minutes late.
Christy: I think Wardo’s jealous.


 

[back at the deposition]
Eduardo Saverin: I honestly wasn’t jealous. I was nervous.
Gretchen: Why?
Eduardo Saverin: Well, I didn’t know him at all. But I had done a search and I’d asked around and he struck me as kind of a wild card.


 

[back at the restaurant]
Christy: Why?
Eduardo Saverin: He crashed out of two pretty big internet companies in spectacular fashion. He’s had a reputation with drugs.
Mark Zuckerberg: He also founded the companies.
Eduardo Saverin: We don’t need him.


 

[at the deposition meeting referring to when they met Sean Parker]
Eduardo Saverin: From that point on it was a Sean-a-thon.


 

Sean Parker: I didn’t want to spend my twenty’s as a professional defender. Who knew the music industry doesn’t have a sense of humor. We tried to sell the company to pay the thirty five million they said we owed in royalties but I guess to them that was a little like selling a stolen car to pay for the stolen gas. So we said screw it, declare bankruptcy.


 

[referring back to what Sean Parker told them about his business ventures]
Eduardo Saverin: And then he went onto his second business venture, which was an online rolodex that he got thrown out of by case equity.


 

Sean Parker: And I wanted to do it nice this time. I put on a tie and I shined my shoes, but nobody wants to take orders from a kid. So let me tell you what happens to a twenty year old at the top of a hot dot com.


 

[referring to his impression of Sean Parker]
Eduardo Saverin: I’m not a psychiatrist, but…
Sy: [sarcastically] Well, I’m glad we’ve got that on the record.
Gretchen: Okay, you’re not a psychiatrist but what?
Eduardo Saverin: A psychiatrist would say that he was paranoid.


 

[telling Eduardo, Mark and Christy about what happened to him after his business successes]
Sean Parker: They’ll hire private detectives who will follow you day and night. You’re a target for high priced escorts. I can’t prove it but I know they tapped my phones. Whatever it is that’s going to trip you up you’ve done already. Private behavior is irrelevant at a time gone by and if somehow, some way you’ve managed to live your life like the Dalai Lama they’ll make shit up because they don’t want you, they want your ideas. And they want you to say ‘thank you’ while you, excuse me, wipe your chin and walk away.


 

[at the deposition referring to their first meeting with Sean Parker]
Eduardo Saverin: And he told story after story about life in Silicon Valley, and parties at Stanford, and down in LA and friends with kallimionnaires. But mostly about how Mark had to, he had to come to California. And then he got around to TheFacebook.


 

Eduardo Saverin: Hey, you know what? Settle and argument for us. I say it’s time to start making money from TheFacebook, but Mark doesn’t want to advertise. Who’s right?
Sean Parker: Um, neither of you yet. TheFacebook is cool that’s what it’s got going for it.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Eduardo Saverin: You don’t want to ruin it with ads because ads aren’t cool.
Mark Zuckerberg: Exactly.


 

Sean Parker: You don’t even know what the thing is yet.
Mark Zuckerberg: I said that exactly.
Sean Parker: How big it can get, how far it can go. This is no time to take your chips down. A million dollars isn’t cool. You know what’s cool?
Eduardo Saverin: [sarcastically] You?
[scene goes back to the deposition room]
Eduardo Saverin: A billion dollars. That shut everybody up.


 

Sean Parker: I don’t have a dog in this fight. I’m just a fan who came to say hi.


 

Eduardo Saverin: He owned Mark after that dinner. He picked up the check, he told Mark they’d talk again soon and he was gone. But not before he made his biggest contribution to the company.


 

[just about he’s to leave the restaurant]
Sean Parker: Drop the ‘the’. Just Facebook. It’s cleaner.


 

Eduardo Saverin: That’s got to be some kind of land speed record for talking.
Mark Zuckerberg: You want to end the party at eleven.
Eduardo Saverin: I’m trying to pay for the party.
Mark Zuckerberg: There won’t be a party unless it’s cool. What do you think?
Eduardo Saverin: Yeah, sure. Let’s drop the ‘the’.


 

[during the deposition]
Sy: Mr. Saverin, have you ever done anything that might be considered legitimate grounds for termination?
Eduardo Saverin: No.
Sy: You never did anything to embarrass the company or even seriously jeopardize it?
Eduardo Saverin: No.
Sy: No?
Eduardo Saverin: No.
Sy: You were accused of animal cruelty.
Eduardo Saverin: Wait.
Sy: You weren’t?
Eduardo Saverin: This is not happening.


 

Eduardo Saverin: I’d gotten into the Phoenix. I’d been accepted and as part of my initiation I had to, for one week, carry with me at all times and take care of a chicken.


 

Eduardo Saverin: I did not torture the chicken. I don’t torture chickens. Are you crazy?
Sy: No and settle down please. I have here an article from The Crimson…


 

Eduardo Saverin: I was having dinner in Kirkland Dining Hall with Mark and I had the chicken with me because I had to have the chicken with me at all times. This was college.


 

Eduardo Saverin: And the dining hall was serving chicken for dinner, so I, and I had to feed my chicken. So I, what I took little pieces of chicken and I gave it to the chicken. Someone must have seen me because the next thing I knew I was being accused of forced cannibalism. I didn’t know you couldn’t do that. I dealt with a various animal rights groups, I dealt with the Associate Dean of the college. This was all resolved.


 

Gretchen: Mr. Zuckerberg was cheating on his final exam?
Eduardo Saverin: I’d rather not answer that Gretchen.
Gretchen: Why not?
Eduardo Saverin: Because I’m not suing him for cheating on his final exam. That’s not what friends do.
Gretchen: Well you just told us he was cheating.
Eduardo Saverin: Oops.
[he turns to look at Mark across the table]
Eduardo Saverin: You told your lawyers I was torturing animals?
Sy: No, he didn’t tell us about it at all. Our litigators are capable of finding a Crimson article. In fact when we raised the subject with him he defended you.
Mark Zuckerberg: [sarcastically] Oops.


 

[in Mark’s dorm room]
Eduardo Saverin: When did you decide to go to California for the summer?
Mark Zuckerberg: You mean when did I actually decide?
Eduardo Saverin: Was it somewhere in the middle of the Sean Parker Variety Hour?
Mark Zuckerberg: He was right. California’s the place we’ve got to be.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: What is your problem with Sean?
Eduardo Saverin: He doesn’t bring anything to the table. He doesn’t have money. Dustin’s a better a better programmer.
Mark Zuckerberg: He’s got connections to VC’s.
Eduardo Saverin: We don’t need VC’s, we need advertisers. And I have connections to VC’s.


 

[referring to Sean Parker]
Eduardo Saverin: You don’t think that it was strange that he was followed by private detectives?
Mark Zuckerberg: Who came up with nothing.
Eduardo Saverin: Enough to get him out of the company. The drugs, the girls…
Mark Zuckerberg: We don’t know that any of that’s true.


 

[Mark’s is testing the candidates interviewing for his intern job]
Eduardo Saverin: What’s going on?
Mark Zuckerberg: They have ten minutes to get root access to a Python webserver, expose it’s SSL encryption and then intercept all traffic over its secure port.
Eduardo Saverin: They’re hacking.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yes, all behind a Pix Firewall Emulator. But here’s the beauty.
Eduardo Saverin: You know I didn’t understand anything you just said, right?
Mark Zuckerberg: I do know that.
Eduardo Saverin: So, what’s the beauty?
Mark Zuckerberg: Every tenth line of code written, they have to drink a shot. And hacking supposed to be stealth, so every time the server detects an intrusion, the candidate responsible has to drink a shot. I also have a program running that has a pop-up window appear simultaneously on all five computers. The last candidate to hit the window has to drink a shot. Plus every three minutes they all have to drink a shot.


 

Eduardo Saverin: Hey, can I ask what part of the interns job will they need to be able to do drunk?
Mark Zuckerberg: You’re right. A more relevant test might be seeing if they can keep a chicken alive for a week.
[he pauses for a moment]
Mark Zuckerberg: That was mean.


 

[during the deposition]
Gretchen: Eighteen thousand dollars?
Eduardo Saverin: Yes.
Gretchen: In addition to the one thousand dollars you’d already put up.
Eduardo Saverin: Yes.
Gretchen: A total of nineteen thousand dollars now.
Eduardo Saverin: Yes
Mark Zuckerberg: Hang on.
[he starts writing on his notepad]
Mark Zuckerberg: I’m just checking your math on that. Yes, I got the same thing.


 

Gretchen: After expressing misgivings about Mr. Zuckerberg taking the company and moving it to California for the summer, why did you put eighteen thousand dollars in an account for his use?
Eduardo Saverin: I figured we were partners. I wanted to be a team player, I figured Mark, Dustin and the new interns could work on the site while I was generating advertiser interest in New York. But mostly I figured, how much could possibly go wrong in three months?


 

Sean Parker: You came to California.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Sean Parker: You made the right choice.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: Your date looks so familiar to me.
Sean Parker: She looks familiar to a lot of people.
Mark Zuckerberg: What do you mean?
Sean Parker: A Stanford MBA named Roy Raymond, wants to buy his wife some lingerie but he’s too embarrassed to shop for it at a department store. Comes up with an idea for a high end place that doesn’t make you feel like a pervert. He gets a forty thousand dollar bank loan, borrows another forty thousand from his in-laws, opens a store and calls it Victoria’s Secret. Makes a half million dollars his first year. He starts a catalogue, opens three mores stores and after five years he sells the company to Leslie Wexner and The Limited for four million dollars. Happy ending, right? Except four years later the company’s worth five hundred million dollars and Roy Raymond jumps off the Golden Gate Bridge. Poor guy just wanted to buy his wife a pair of thigh highs.
Mark Zuckerberg: Was that a parable?
Sean Parker: My date’s a Victoria’s Secret model. That’s why she looks familiar to you.


 

Sean Parker: You know why I started Napster?
[Mark shakes his head]
Sean Parker: The girl I loved in high school was with the co-captain of varsity lacrosse team and I wanted to take her from him. So I decided to come up with the next big thing.
Mark Zuckerberg: I didn’t know that.
Sean Parker: Napster wasn’t a failure. I changed the music industry for better and for always. It may not have been good business but it pissed a lot of people off. And isn’t that what your Facemash was about? They’re scared of me pal and they’re going to be scared of you. What the VC’s wanted to say “Good idea, kid. Grownups will take it from here”. But not this time. This is our time. This time you’re going to, you’re going to hand them a business card that says “I’m CEO Bitch”. That’s what I want for you.


 

[to Mark]
Sean Parker: This is a once in a generation holy shit idea and the water under the Golden Gate is freezing cold. Look at my face and tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about.


 

[after meeting Price Albert during the party held for rowing crew competitors]
Tyler Winklevoss: So you flew all the way out here to see that?
Divya Narendra: Wouldn’t have missed it brother. How’s the royalty?
Cameron Winklevoss: Uh, I just wanted him to tell me a couple more times how close the race was. Just brutal, brutally, brutally excruciating! Jesus…
Divya Narendra: Cam, the guy’s a prince of a country the size of Nantucket. Relax, it’s fine.


 

[after finding out that Facebook has expanded to UK Universities]
Tyler Winklevoss: I don’t mind that we lost to the Dutch today by less than a second. That was a good race, and that was a fair race and they’ll see us again. What I mind and what you should mind is showing up on Monday for a race that was run on Sunday. We tried talking to him ourselves, we tried writing a letter, we tried the Ad Board and we tried talking to the President of the University. Now I am asking you for the last time let’s take the considerable resources at our disposal and sue him in a federal court.
Divya Narendra: Come on!
Cameron Winklevoss: I need a real drink.
[he starts to walk out the room but stops and turns]
Cameron Winklevoss: Screw it! Let’s gut the frigging nerd!


 

Sean Parker: You think you know me, right?
Eduardo Saverin: I’ve read enough.
Sean Parker: You know how much I’ve read about?
[Eduardo shakes his head]
Sean Parker: Nothing.


 

[after Eduardo has turned up in California to find Sean has moved in with Mark and working on Facebook]
Mark Zuckerberg: So how is Christy?
Eduardo Saverin: Christy’s crazy.
Mark Zuckerberg: Is that fun?
Eduardo Saverin: Nope. She’s actually psychotic. She’s insanely jealous, she is irrational and I’m frightened of her.
Mark Zuckerberg: Still, it’s nice you have a girlfriend.


 

[referring to Sean]
Eduardo Saverin: I do not want that guy representing himself as part of this company.
Mark Zuckerberg: You’ve got to move here, Wardo, this is where it’s all happening.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: I’m afraid if you don’t come out here you’re going to get left behind. I want, I want, I need you out here. Please don’t tell him I said that.
Eduardo Saverin: What did you just say?
Mark Zuckerberg: He’s moving faster than any of us ever imagined it would. It’s moving fast.


 

[to Mark]
Eduardo Saverin: What did you mean get left behind?


 

[whilst waiting to meet Peter Theil]
Sean Parker: You know this is where they filmed Towering Inferno.
Mark Zuckerberg: That’s comforting.


 

[Christy shows up in Eduard’s apartment after he’s returned from California]
Christy: And when were you going to call me?
Eduardo Saverin: Chris, it was kind of rough trip and I was tired…
Christy: And or answer one of my forty seven texts? Did you know I sent forty seven texts?
Eduardo Saverin: I did and I thought that was incredibly normal behavior.
Christy: Are you mocking me?


 

Christy: Why does you status say “single” on your Facebook page?
Eduardo Saverin: What?
Christy: Why does your relationship status say “single” on you Facebook page?
Eduardo Saverin: I was single when I set up the page.
Christy: And you just never bothered to change it?
Eduardo Saverin: I…
Christy: What?
Eduardo Saverin: I don’t know how.
Christy: Do I look stupid to you?
Eduardo Saverin: No. Calm down.
Christy: You’re asking me to believe that the CFO of Facebook doesn’t know how to change his relationship status on Facebook?


 

Christy: No. You didn’t change it so you could screw those Silicon Valley sluts every time you go out to see Mark.
Eduardo Saverin: That isn’t even remotely true. And I can promise you that the Silicon Valley sluts don’t care what anyone’s relationship status is on Facebook.


 

[Eduardo’s cell phone rings and Christy grabs it]
Christy: It’s Mark.
[she throws the phone to Eduardo]
Eduardo Saverin: Okay, this is going to be tricky. Uh, open your present. It’s a silk scarf.
Christy: Have you ever seen me wear a scarf?
Eduardo Saverin: This’ll be your first.


 

[on the phone]
Mark Zuckerberg: You froze the account.
Eduardo Saverin: I had to get your attention, Mark.
Mark Zuckerberg: Do you realize that you jeopardized the entire company? Do you realize that your actions could have permanently destroyed everything I’ve been working on?
Eduardo Saverin: We have been working on.
Mark Zuckerberg: Without money the site can’t function. Okay, let me tell you the difference between Facebook and everybody else; we don’t crash, ever! If the servers are down for even a day our entire reputation is irreversibly destroyed.


 

[whilst on the phone to Mark, Eduardo sees Christy set the scarf he’s given her on fire]
Mark Zuckerberg: Did you like being nobody? Did you like being a joke? Do you want to go back to that?
Eduardo Saverin: Hang on! Hang on! Hang on! Hang on!
[he put his phone down and puts Mark on speaker while he tries to put the fire out]
Mark Zuckerberg: That was the act of a child, not a businessman. And it certainly was not the act of a friend! Do you know how embarrassed I was for me to try to cash a check today? I’m not going back to that life.


 

[after he’s put the fire put the fire]
Eduardo Saverin: Look, I’m sorry! I was angry and maybe it was childish, but I had to get your attention.
Mark Zuckerberg: Wardo, I said I got some good news.
Eduardo Saverin: What is it?
Mark Zuckerberg: Peter Theil just made an angel investment of half a million dollars.
Eduardo Saverin: What?
Mark Zuckerberg: Half million dollars. And he’s setting us up in an office. They want to re-incorporate the company, they want to meet you. They need your signature on some documents so you got to get your ass on the first flight back to San Francisco. I need my CFO.


 

[at the Facebook office, Eduardo is meeting with the lawyers]
Eduardo Saverin: So how many shares of stock will I own?
Facebook Lawyer 1: Uh, one million three hundred and twenty eight thousand and three hundred and thirty four.
Eduardo Saverin: Jesus Christ!
Facebook Lawyer 1: That represents a thirty four point four percent ownership share. Why the increase from the original thirty percent?
Eduardo Saverin: Because you may need to dilute it to award shares to new investors.


 

Facebook Lawyer 2: You should know that Marks has already taken his percentage from sixty down to fifty one.
Eduardo Saverin: Well, Mark doesn’t care about money and he needs to be protected.
Facebook Lawyer 1: Uh, Dustin Moskowitz owns six point eighty one percent, Sean Parker six point forty seven percent.
Eduardo Saverin: I can live with that.
Facebook Lawyer 1: And Peter Theil seven percent. Would you like to use my pen?


 

[at the deposition the court reporter repeats the question that was put to Eduardo]
Court Reporter: Counsel: “And when you signed these documents were you aware that you were signing your own death certificate?”
Eduardo Saverin: No. It was insanely stupid of me not to have my own lawyers look over all the, in all honesty I thought they were my lawyers.
[he turns his chair and looks over to Mark]
Eduardo Saverin: I was your only friend. You got one friend.
[he turns his back to Mark again]
Eduardo Saverin: My father won’t even look at me.


 

[at the Facebook office]
Mark Zuckerberg: But you got to come back. Somewhere around the end of November, early December. Peter wants to throw us an amazing party when we hit a million members, it’s going to be out of control. You got to come back for it.
Eduardo Saverin: A million members.
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Eduardo Saverin: Remember the algorithm on the window at Kirkland?
Mark Zuckerberg: Yeah.
Eduardo Saverin: Yeah, I’ll be here.


 

[Sean drives Marks to a big office building. Mark is dressed in his pajamas]
Mark Zuckerberg: You sure about this?
Sean Parker: You’re twenty minute late. You’re going to walk in there and say you overslept and didn’t have time to get dressed. They’re going to pitch you. Case Equity is going to pitch you. They’re going to beg you to take their money. You’re going to nod, you’re going to nod, you’re going to nod and then you’re going to say; “Which one of you is Roth?” No not Roth, Manningham. “Which one of you is Mitchell Manningham?” And he’ll say; “I am”. And you say; “Sean Parker says ‘Fuck you’. Walk out.
Mark Zuckerberg: Okay.


 

[back at the deposition]
Eduardo Saverin: In late November I got the email from Mark, telling me to come out for the millionth member party.
Gretchen: What else did the email say?
Eduardo Saverin: It said that we had to have a business meeting. That Mark and Sean had played some kind of revenge stunt on Case Equity and that Manningham was so impressed that he was now making an investment offer that was hard to turn down. So I went to California, and I went straight to the new offices. I didn’t know whether to dress for the party or for the business meeting so I kind of dressed for both. But it didn’t matter.
Gretchen: Why not?
Eduardo Saverin: Because I wasn’t called out there for either one.
Gretchen: What were you called out there for?
Eduardo Saverin: An ambush.


 

[referring back to his meeting with the Facebook lawyer]
Eduardo Saverin: At first I thought he was joking, giving me more contracts to sign. But then I started reading.


 

[at the Facebook office after Eduardo has read the papers the lawyer had given him]
Eduardo Saverin: [angrily] You issued twenty four million new shares of stock.
Mark Zuckerberg: You were told that if new investors came along…
Eduardo Saverin: How much of your shares were diluted? How much were his?
[pointing to Sean]


 

Gretchen: What was Mr. Zuckerberg’s ownership share diluted down to?
Eduardo Saverin: It wasn’t.
Gretchen: What was Mr. Moskowitz’s ownership share diluted down to?
Eduardo Saverin: It wasn’t.
Gretchen: What was Sean Parker’s ownership share diluted down to?
Eduardo Saverin: It wasn’t.
Gretchen: What was Peter Theil’s ownership share diluted down to?
Eduardo Saverin: It wasn’t.
Gretchen: And what was your ownership share diluted down to?
Eduardo Saverin: Point zero three percent.


 

[at the Facebook office after Eduardo’s confronted Mark about his diluted shares]
Mark Zuckerberg: You signed the papers.
Eduardo Saverin: You set me up!
Mark Zuckerberg: You’re going to blame me because you were the business head of the company and you made a bad business deal with your own company?
Eduardo Saverin: It’s going to be like I’m not part of Facebook!
Sean Parker: It won’t be like you’re not a part of Facebook, you’re not a part of Facebook.
Eduardo Saverin: My name’s on the masthead.


 

Sean Parker: You think we were going to let you parade around in your ridiculous suits pretending you were running this company?
Eduardo Saverin: [shouting] Sorry! My Prada’s at the cleaners along with my hoodie and my fuck-you-flip-flops you pretentious douchebag!


 

Eduardo Saverin: I’m not signing those papers.
Sean Parker: We will get the signature.
[to Mark]
Eduardo Saverin: Tell me this isn’t about me getting into the Phoenix.


 

Eduardo Saverin: You planted that story about the chicken.
Mark Zuckerberg: I didn’t plant the story about the chicken.
Sean Parker: What’s he talking about?
Eduardo Saverin: You had me accused of animal cruelty.
Sean Parker: Seriously, what the hell’s the chicken?
Eduardo Saverin: And I’ll bet what you hated the most is that they identified me as a co-founder of Facebook, which I am! You better lawyer up asshole, because I’m not coming back for thirty percent, I’m coming back for everything!


 

[as Eduardo’s leaving the Facebook office]
Sean Parker: Hang on. I almost forgot, here’s your nineteen thousand dollars. I wouldn’t cash it though, I drew it on the account your froze.
[Eduardo quickly goes to punch Sean in the face but Sean flinches back]
Eduardo Saverin: I like standing next to you, Sean. It makes me look so tough.


 

[after Eduardo’s left the building]
Mark Zuckerberg: You were kind of rough on him.
Sean Parker: That’s life in the NFL.
Mark Zuckerberg: You know you didn’t have to be that rough on him.


 

[Sean’s on the phone to Mark after his party was raided by the police]
Sean Parker: Listen, something’s happened.
[Mark listens to Sean’s end of the conversation]
Mark Zuckerberg: Shit!
Sean Parker: It’s all right. It’s going to be all right. I posted bail and I wasn’t doing anything. I mean I’ve got allergies.
Mark Zuckerberg: Interns.
Sean Parker: It was just a party.
Mark Zuckerberg: This is going to be news, Sean. It’s going to be online any second.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: I will get it under control. I will call someone and see what the next move is, but this is going to be news now.
Sean Parker: You don’t think Eduardo was involved do you? I mean do you think…
Mark Zuckerberg: No.
Sean Parker: Or Manningham? One of them. Somebody sent the coke in there because I got in there, you believe me? This is going to be fine.
[Mark doesn’t answer]
Sean Parker: Right?
Mark Zuckerberg: Go home, Sean.
[he closes his phone shut]


 

[Marilyn walks in the deposition conference room where Mark is sitting alone after]
Marylin Delpy: What happened to Sean?
Mark Zuckerberg: He still owns seven percent of the company.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: I’m not a bad guy.
Marylin Delpy: I know that. When there’s emotional testimony I assume eighty five percent of it is exaggeration.
Mark Zuckerberg: And the other fifteen?
Marylin Delpy: Perjury. Creation myths need a devil.


 

[referring to his lawyers decision]
Mark Zuckerberg: They’re going to settle?
Marylin Delpy: Oh, yeah. And you’re going to have to pay a little extra.
Mark Zuckerberg: Why?
Marylin Delpy: So that these guys sign a non-disclosure agreement. They say one unflattering word about you in public you own their wife and kids.
Mark Zuckerberg: I invented Facebook.


 

Marylin Delpy: I’ve been licensed to practice law for all of twenty months and I could get a jury to believe that you planted the story about Eduardo and the chicken. Watch what else. Why weren’t you at Sean’s sorority party that night?
Mark Zuckerberg: You think I’m the one that called the police?
Marylin Delpy: Doesn’t matter. I asked the question now everybody’s thinking about it. You’ve lost your jury in the first ten minutes.


 

Mark Zuckerberg: Farm animals?
Marylin Delpy: Yeah.
Mark Zuckerberg: I was drunk and angry and stupid.
Marylin Delpy: And blogging.
Mark Zuckerberg: And blogging.
Marylin Delpy: Pay them. In the scheme of things it’s a speeding ticket. That’s what Sy will tell you tomorrow.


 

[last lines]
Mark Zuckerberg: Thanks. I appreciate your help today.
Marylin Delpy: You’re not an asshole, Mark. You’re just trying so hard to be.
[Marylin leaves. Mark logs onto Facebook and sends a ‘request to add as friend’ to Erica Albright]

 


Total Quotes: 179

 



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