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Starring: Oscar Isaac, Charlize Theron, Chloë Grace Moretz, Nick Kroll, Javon ‘Wanna’ Walton, Wallace Shawn, Bette Midler, Bill Hader, Snoop Dogg
OUR RATING: ★★☆☆☆
Animated comedy sequel directed by, Greg Tiernan, Conrad Vernon, Laura Brousseau, and Kevin Pavlovic. The Addams Family 2 (2021) we find Morticia and Gomez (Charlize Theron and Oscar Isaac) distraught that their children are growing up, skipping family dinners, and totally consumed with “scream time”. To reclaim their bond they decide to cram Wednesday (Chloë Grace Moretz), Pugsley (Javon ‘Wanna’ Walton), Uncle Fester (Nick Kroll), and the crew into their haunted camper, and hit the road for one last miserable family vacation across America. What could possibly go wrong?
Our Favorite Quotes:'If you don't mind, I will respectfully decline the hug. I've been social distancing since birth.' - Wednesday Addams (The Addams Family 2) Click To Tweet
Wednesday Addams: I’m surrounded by idiots.
Wednesday Addams: Have you ever found yourself discontented by those closest to you? Are you irked by their inability to heed simple requests? Such as, “Please don’t come to my science fair.”
Gomez Addams: She’s talking about us.
Morticia Addams: [referring to Wednesday] She’s an enfant terrible. With the focus on terrible.
Gomez Addams: Cara mia, you know what French does to me.
Science Fair Announcer: This year, we are embracing a new philosophy. Just trying makes you a winner.
Wednesday Addams: But how can you be a winner if no one is a loser?
Science Fair Announcer: Every single one of you is special.
Wednesday Addams: Disagree.
Gomez Addams: Morticia, my queen, you inflame me. I feel liquid magma lapping at my body.
Morticia Addams: You’re on fire, dear.
Gomez Addams: Ha! So I am!
Wednesday Addams: Great thinkers need obstacles to function. Yet, with every meaningless trophy, I become more and more unremarkable. And with every hug, more brain cells erode. But, like the phoenix from the ashes, I shall rise above this setback. Together, we shall turn heads, Socrates.
Uncle Fester: So, I thought you should read my book! The Fester Method: How to Woo and Other Tips on Love.
Pugsley Addams: You wrote this?
Uncle Fester: Self-published, on the Internet. Not easy to do. Pugsley, I’ve been on three first dates. I mean, who else has that kind of experience?
Grandma: Hey, you kids, come on down here. It’s dinner time.
Uncle Fester: Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy! It’s dinner time. My favorite nighttime meal!
Morticia Addams: [reading Wednesday’s note] “Dearest Mother and Father, I will not be attending this evening’s ritual mastication.”
Gomez Addams: [referring to Wednesday] Why is she avoiding us? All I ever do is try to love and support her.
Morticia Addams: Gomez, I think she’s saying that’s the problem.
Gomez Addams: I have the very solution to the problem, cara mia. We’ll take a family road trip.
Morticia Addams: What?
Gomez Addams: You’ve always wanted to see more of this great country.
Morticia Addams: Well, it’s true. We have some of the best dark secrets, as countries go.
Gomez Addams: Then it’s settled! We are going on an Addams family vacation!
Gomez Addams: Feast your eyes on the old Addams camper. Thing’s been fixing it up.
Uncle Fester: It’s a hybrid. Half car, half eyesore.
Wednesday Addams: Mother, Father, this is cruel. Even for you.
Gomez Addams: Let’s go, Wednesday. It’s time for some family bonding. Whether you like it, or not. You see, Wednesday, this trip will bring the Addams family closer than ever before.
Wednesday Addams: Or there will be no survivors.
'Great thinkers need obstacles to function.' - Wednesday Addams (The Addams Family 2) Click To Tweet
Mr. Mustela: I can’t believe he gave me the finger.
Morticia Addams: Thank you for watching the house while we’re gone, Grandma. It’s such a relief to know it’s in safe hands.
Grandma: Oh, please. Trust me, these hands have cracked many safes.
Gomez Addams: Thing, let the vacation commence! Let’s roll!
Grandma: Bye! Farewell! Adios! Toodle-oo! Whoo-hoo-hoo! I thought they’d never leave.
Spirit of the House: Let’s party!
Gomez Addams: I thought that first, we shall pay our respects to the immolated in the witch-haunted city of Salem. Then, in the great nomadic tradition of our ancestors, we’ll flit hither and thither across this great nation until we reach our final destination. The place on Earth where people are happiest! Death Valley!
Morticia Addams: You’re both growing up so fast. Soon, you’ll move out, and it’ll be nice to have a memory we could look back upon. No matter how terrible.
Uncle Fester: Ooh, like prom night.
'Different is what the extra D in Addams stands for.' - Gomez Addams, 'I always thought it stood for dismemberment.' - Wednesday Addams (The Addams Family 2) Click To Tweet
Gomez Addams: Thing, how did this happen? We were supposed to be in Salem.
Uncle Fester: Ah, don’t be mad, brother. Niagara Falls is the great Wonder of the World, and kills the most tourists, with its powerful, seductive water.
Gomez Addams: Hey, Fester. Are you feeling alright? You’re not your usual creepy self.
Morticia Addams: I’m sorry, Wednesday. I know how much you wanted to see where girls your age were burned at the stake. What did you call them again?
Wednesday Addams: Squad goals.
Morticia Addams: I saw a vintage store in town. Maybe it’s time for you to try out a more mature look.
Wednesday Addams: The little black dress is a classic, Mother.
Gomez Addams: There’s my little holy terror.
Gomez Addams: Did you know dozens of people tried to go over these falls in wooden barrels?
Morticia Addams: Does anyone survive?
Gomez Addams: Some do. Some don’t. I hear it’s a barrel of fun.
Uncle Fester: The key with women is to make a strong first impression.
Pugsley Addams: You mean like a bad smell?
Uncle Fester: Well, that goes without saying.
Proposing Guy: Madison, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?
Girlfriend: [shrieks and runs off] Help!
Proposing Guy: Is that a maybe?
Gomez Addams: Wednesday, let’s try a little family trust-building exercise.
Wednesday Addams: I don’t believe in exercise.
Wednesday Addams: Father. His erratic behavior. This last-minute family trip to make memories. Giving hugs. It’s torture. And not the fun kind, like putting leeches in Pugsley’s briefs. Anyway, I’m quite sure he’s dying.
Morticia Addams: What?
Wednesday Addams: Don’t worry. I won’t tell Pugsley. Not yet. He’ll enjoy the surprise. But if you’re afraid to ask my permission to take a new lover, just know you have it.
'I love it when your murderous maternal instincts kick in!' - Gomez Addams (The Addams Family 2) Click To Tweet
Morticia Addams: Gomez, have you heard from your mother yet? She’s not answering my texts.
Gomez Addams: Oh, she’s probably having an early night. The woman is almost a hundred and two years-old, after all.