The Boss Baby 2: Family Business Best Quotes

Starring: Alec Baldwin, James Marsden, Amy Sedaris, Ariana Greenblatt, Eva Longoria, Jimmy Kimmel, Lisa Kudrow, Jeff Goldblum

OUR RATING: ★★★☆☆

Story:

Animated comedy sequel directed by Tom McGrath. The Boss Baby 2: Family Business follows Tim (James Marsden) and his Boss Baby little brother Ted (Alec Baldwin), who have now become adults and drifted away from each other. Tim is now married to Carol (Eva Longoria), and they live in the suburbs with their super-smart seven year-old daughter Tabitha (Ariana Greenblatt), and new infant Tina (Amy Sedaris). Ted is a hedge fund CEO. But a new boss baby with a cutting-edge approach and a can-do attitude is about to bring them together again, and inspire a new family business.

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Our Favorite Quote:

'The difference in “try” and “triumph” is just a little oomph.' - Ted (The Boss Baby: Family Business) Share on X

Best Quotes

Tim: Time is a funny thing. When I was a kid, the days lasted forever. But the years, well, they went by so fast. Before you know it, you’re all grown-up. It even happened to me. My name’s Tim, and this, well, this is the rest of my story.

Tim: They call me a stay-at-home dad, which means, I hardly get to stay at home.

Carol: Thank you. You know what they say, “It’s all about the dough.” And I couldn’t have done it without my husband. He really rose to the occasion.
Tim: It’s the yeast I can do!

Tim: And as for my baby brother, Ted, well, he grew up to be the boss alright. He’s so busy we hardly see him anymore. But, hey, he always remembers to send inappropriately lavish gifts on special occasions.
Tabitha: [referring to her new pony] OMG! Uncle Ted is the best!

Tim: All in all, my life is pretty perfect. But all that was about to change. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, you’re only a kid once. Once you grow up, you can never go back.

Tim: Good night, Tabitha.
Tabitha: [as Tim goes to kiss her goodnight] Don’t you think I’m a little old for that now?
Tim: [shakes her hand] Okay.
Tabitha: I think it’s time we both grow up. I look forward to greeting you at the breakfast table.

Tim: Where has the time gone?
Wizzie: How should I know?

Wizzie: You cast me into eternal darkness, and wreaked havoc on my circadian rhythms.
Tim: I’m sorry, Wizzie. Hey, but you look great though.
Wizzie: Except for the arm, you mean.
Tim: I didn’t even notice.
Wizzie: You thought it.

Wizzie: You have produced an heir, Timothy?
Tim: Two, actually.
Wizzie: Two? Let the bells ring!

Tim: Tabitha. Man, Wizzie, she’s growing up so fast. It’s like she doesn’t even need me anymore.
Wizzie: Yes, first, they start spending less time with you. Then they stop coming to you for advice.
Tim: Exactly.
Wizzie: Soon, they take you for granted.
Tim: I guess.
Wizzie: Then break your arm.
Tim: What?
Wizzie: Then stuff you into a box!

Tim: I’m just, I’m afraid Tabitha and I are growing apart, like I did with my brother. I thought we had all the time in the world. But you can’t turn back time, can you?
Wizzie: How dare you question my power!

Wizzie: [as Ted hears a noise coming from Tina’s room] What is it? A creature of the night? Witches? Is it the baying of the hounds of hell?
Tim: Wizzie!
Wizzie: Don’t go, Tim! I can turn back time, to the golden years, when it was just you and me. My good arm. Don’t open the door. Remember last time!

Tina: [after Tim hears Tina talk] Daddy, how many fingers am I holding up?
Tim: Thursday?
Tina: I should’ve given you a warning. I forgot you were an old man.

Tim: You’re from BabyCorp?
Tina: Yes. BabyCorp is more of what I call a side hustle for me. The point is I’m all in on the Templetons. Go, Templetons!

Tina: There’s a crisis at BabyCorp.
Tim: What is it this time? Kittens?
Tina: No. This time, it’s even worse.
Tim: Worse than kittens?

Tim: Ooh, I want to help. What do you want me to do?
Tina: That’s the spirit, daddy. You are exactly who I need.
Tim: Yes!
Tina: To get Uncle Ted.
Tim: No. What?

Tina: All the pressure’s on me, Pop. When I volunteered for this gig, I thought it would be easy. But you two never see each other. It’s so sad. It’s like, “F-minus. See me after class.”

Tim: [referring to Ted] No, I’m not going to call him right now.
Tina: Daddy, can’t never could.

Tim: There’s no point, okay? I call him. I invite him. He never shows up. He’s always got a work meeting, or a business trip, or a conference call. All he cares about is work. But after a while, you just stop trying.
Tina: He’s still your brother. You were partners.
Tim: Yeah, I guess sometimes you just, you grow up, and grow apart.

Tina: Daddy, don’t say no. What if everybody said no? Nothing would happen. Nothing would get off the ground. You got to wake up every day, and you got to say, “Yes, yes, yes!” Surprise me. Say yes.

Tim: [after Ted returns due to the voicemail left by Tim] I swear I didn’t leave that message. On purpose. I…
Carol: Butt-dialed?
Tim: With my butt. While I was talking in my sleep. I do that sometimes.
Ted: You sleep-butt-dialed me?
Tim: With my butt.

Tim: [referring to Tina] She comes from a secret corporation run by babies.
Ted: Tim, I’m going to give you the name of a doctor. Roy Federman. Just tell him I sent you, okay?

Ted: [referring to Tina] She can’t talk, Tim.
Tim: Stop interrupting!
Ted: Interrupting what? I don’t hear anything.
Tim: Except your obnoxious voice. You hear that.
Ted: I have a beautiful voice.

Tim: [offers Ted a pacifier] Suck it, Ted.
Ted: I beg your pardon?
Tim: You, suck.
Ted: No, no, Tim. You suck.

Tina: Excuse me. I hate to interrupt. But may I make a suggestion? Why don’t you both suck it?
[she tosses two pacifiers into the air and throws them into Ted and Tim’s mouths]
Ted: She can talk.
Tim: A lot.

Ted: [referring to the statue at BabyCorp] Is that me?
Tina: If you’re fishing for a compliment, you caught one! You are a legend in this joint.
Tim: A statue?
Ted: Well, I did single-handedly save the company.
Tim: Double-handedly. Right? We were partners.
Ted: Really? I don’t see your statue.
Tina: I still love you, daddy.
Tim: They got the head size right.

Ted: Take it from me, you have to be aggressive if you want to get ahead. Climb that corporate ladder, until you’re the last baby standing at the top.
Tina: Actually, I prioritize a good work-life balance, and a positive environment where my ideas are valued.
Ted: [laughs] Oh, you’re serious.

See more The Boss Baby: Family Business Quotes

Tina: If Armstrong’s philosophy keeps spreading, it could be the end of childhood.
Ted: No. Childhood was the worst three years of my life.
Tina: That’s so sad. You probably just didn’t do it right.
Ted: Huh?
Tina: Aw. But luckily, you get a do-over. A second chance.

Tina: BabyCorp has developed a new super-duper baby formula that can turn a grown-up back into a baby. We have it in cherry, grape, orange, and lime.
Ted: For real?

Ted: You want me to be a baby?
Tim: Hey, it’s what you do best.

Tina: It’s the perfect disguise. And it only lasts forty-eight teensy-weensy hours.

Ted: [reading from the baby formula bottle] “Warning, may cause drooling, babbling, emotional outbursts, fits of laughter, loss of bowel control, chubby thighs?” I think some guys at my gym take this stuff.
[as his hand shrinks]
Ted: My texting hand!

Ted: I’m better with this kind of thing!
Tim: Oh! And what kind of thing is that, Flock of Seagulls?

Tina: You might feel very emotional, have some mood swings.
Tim: [as he turns into a teenager] Oh! Hey!
Tina: Ouch. There’s the awkward stage.

Tim: You always have to be the hero, don’t you?
Ted: What’s that supposed to mean?
Tim: Never see him, all of a sudden, he shows up with a pony.
Ted: You’re just jealous, helmet head.

Tim: You can’t hug money, you know.
Ted: But you can, Tim. You can!
Tina: Men. Am I right?

Ted: My helicopter’s double-parked.

Tina: I got to lose this baby fat.

Ted: [as he tries to take a bite of an apple] I miss my teeth.

Tim: BabyCorp wants to get the team back together, huh?
Tina: No. They think that’s a terrible idea.
Ted: Of course they do.
Tina: Well, I’m the boss, applesauce. And I think you two are better together than you are apart.

Ted: Well, I work alone, or at least not with him.
Tim: Hey. There’s no “I” in “team”.
Ted: Actually, there’s no “U” in “team” either. But there is an “M-E”.

Tina: But teamwork doesn’t seem work.
Ted: Ah. If you want something done right, do it yourself.
Tina: We’re all in it together.
Ted: Every man for himself.
Tina: One is the loneliest number.
Ted: The ayes have it.
Tina: We the people!

Tina: Guess we’ll just have to melt down your big old statue and turn it into participation trophies.
Ted: Please, no, don’t hurt my statue!

Tina: Easy-breezy, taco-peasy, boys. Let’s get some sleep!
[falls asleep on the spot]

Ted: What’s going on?
Tim: Ah, I forgot to set Wizzie for daylight savings!
Ted: What?!
Wizzie: Daylight can’t be saved, Tim!

Ted: [referring to their sailor outfits] What have you done to me?!
Tim: No. Really? What, are we going sailing?

Tim: This pony hates me. Oh!
Ted: It’s not that she hates you, Tim. She just doesn’t respect you.

Tim: Go left! Go left!
Ted: I’m going to go where navigation says.
Navigation: Turn left.
Ted: Thank you, navigation.

Tim: You did it.
Ted: We did it.
Tim: I guess we did.
Ted: [referring to the pony] I was talking about me and Precious.

Ted: She’s a real chip off the old block.
Tim: Wait, who’s the block?
Ted: I’m the block.
Tim: Well, you can’t be the block. I’m the block.
Ted: Then start acting like a block.
Tim: What does that mean? I’m the block. I’ve always been the block.
Ted: Yeah. Not even close.

Tim: All I do is block. I wake up in the morning, I block. I go to sleep, blocking. I’m the block.
Ted: Tim, enough. I’m the block.
Ted: No, you’re not! Stop it!

Ted: I’m trapped in the dim-dim holding tank. I’m having a panic attack. There must be a way out of here.

Ted: Attention, everyone. Who wants to play Shawshank?

Little Bo Peep Baby: We can build a hot-air balloon out of Popsicle sticks and bubble gum!
Ted: And how would it fly?
Little Bo Peep Baby: Pixie dust!

Glue Baby: I like glue.
Ted: Who doesn’t? But we’re trying to brainstorm here.
Glue Baby: Glue’s good.

Ted: The difference in “try” and “triumph” is just a little oomph.

Ted: Go big or go home.
Little Bo Peep Baby: Okay. Going home.

Ted: On my signal, unleash heck.

Ted: Remember, your size doesn’t determine your strength.

Ted: It’s like they always say, If you want something done right, you have to do it without your brother!

Ted: We meet again, doorknob.

Dr. Armstrong: Jealousy, fear. Hey, I faced the same obstacles. In fact, you know, you remind me a lot of myself when I was your age, which is now. What? Surprise, surprise.
Ted: What the frittata?
Dr. Armstrong: Well put.

Ted: You’re a baby. I repeat, you’re a baby.
Dr. Armstrong: So surprised, you said it twice.

Dr. Armstrong: Unfortunately, people are not ready for a baby in a position of power. Yet.
Ted: Remind me to get the number of your muttonchop guy.

Dr. Armstrong: We may be small, but we’re about to teach grown-ups a big lesson.

Tim: Yep, where there’s crying, there’s my brother.

Ted: You failed me, Tim. I was desperate. I crawled. I did things with glue that I’m not proud of, but I made it. I made it all the way to Armstrong’s office, and then, where’s Tim?

Ted: See, Tim, this is why I work alone. I’ll succeed in the mission. You can take the pony home.
Tim: The only thing you’re ever going to succeed at is being alone.
Ted: Fine.
Tim: Fine!

Tim: What? You never told me you had an older sister who could drive.
Tabitha: Uh, that’s my mom.
Carol: Tabitha, don’t interrupt.

Ted: Children can be so cruel.

Ted: This is exactly like Bill Gates rec room, but a little smaller.

Ted: Aw. Now, aren’t you a cutie in that little karate outfit.
[the Baby Ninja splices Ted’s phone with his sword]
Ted: Huh. Is this some kind of a ninja boy band?

Ted: [as the Baby Ninjas are chasing him] I give up. Cobra Kai! Cobra Kai!

Ted: What maniacal underground fortress doesn’t have ninjas? Am I right?

Dr. Armstrong: I taught babies to code.
Ted: No.
Dr. Armstrong: Yes. And you know what they say about having an infinite amount of monkeys banging on typewriters?
Ted: They will eventually write Shakespeare?
Dr. Armstrong: A-plus. Oh, boy, you are smart. Or the most popular apps that money can buy.
Ted: They’re writing apps.
Dr. Armstrong: Cat Chat. Palm Doodle. Ooh, Find My Nose. Stock Crush.
Ted: You did Stock Crush? I love Stock Crush.

Dr. Armstrong: But some things are more important than money.
Ted: Please don’t say “love”.
Dr. Armstrong: Power.
Ted: That’s more like it.

Tabitha: You’re weird.
Tim: I am?
Tabitha: Yeah, but in a good way.

Tabitha: [referring to the pageant] My whole family is going to be there, including my dad.
Tim: Oh. Right. You’re embarrassed of him?
Tabitha: No. No, it’s not that. It’s just, he’s really good at this kind of thing, being creative, and using your imagination, but it’s hard for me. I just want him to be proud of me. You know?
Tim: Really?
Tabitha: Well, yeah.

Dr. Armstrong: I even had parents. Mine were child psychologists who made me part of an experiment.
Ted: Really?
Dr. Armstrong: They exposed me to ten thousand hours of Mozart, language lessons, and public radio.
Ted: Wow. I hate public radio.

Dr. Armstrong: Why do parents get to be in charge, anyway? They had their chance, and what did we get? Pollution, politics, wars.
Babies: Ooh.
Dr. Armstrong: Not “ooh”. “Boo”.

Grandpa (Ted Sr.): He really looked up to his big brother, though.
Tim, Tabitha: He did?
Grandma (Janice): Oh, yeah. He wouldn’t leave him alone.
Grandpa (Ted Sr.): Everything Tim did, Teddy wanted to do.

Grandma (Janice): [referring to Ted] He was so proud of his little brother.
Grandpa (Ted Sr.): Oh, yeah.
Grandma (Janice): He loved showing him off.
Grandpa (Ted Sr.): Those guys did everything together.
Grandma (Janice): They were best friends.

Grandpa (Ted Sr.): [to young Tim] Bye, Marcos.
Grandma (Janice): Lightspeed.
Grandpa (Ted Sr.): Weird kid.
Grandma (Janice): Yeah, I don’t like him.

Ted: Don’t they understand it’s the fate of the world?
Tina: I’ve been on hold forever!
Recorded Child Voice: All operators are currently napping.
Tina: I’ve been on hold so long I got a tooth growing in.

Ted: Back in my day, we wrote memos.
Tina: That’s cute and old-timey.
Ted: I weep for the future.

Tina: Do you want to talk about your feelings now while I’m on hold? I can give you twenty minutes.
Ted: No.
Tina: Let’s get to the nut, the nugget. What are you afraid of?
Ted: Sharks, getting shot in the head with an arrow. And the IRS. That’s it.

Tina: Now, what about being lonely?
Ted: I’m not lonely. I’m just alone. There’s a difference.

Young Tim: [Ted reads Tim’s letter] Dear Boss Baby, I promise you this. Every morning when you wake up, I will be there. Every night at dinner, I will be there. Every birthday party, every Christmas morning, I will be there. Year after year after year. And you and I will always be brothers. Always.
Tina: Makes me want to make a sad face.

Ted: We were just kids. We didn’t know anything about the real world. And eventually, you have to grow up.
Tina: Just because you grow up, it doesn’t mean you have to grow apart.
Ted: I don’t know. Maybe it’s already too late.

Tim: Look, I’m sorry about what I said at recess.
Ted: What happens on the playground stays on the playground.
Tim: I was just worried about Tabitha, you know?
Ted: She’s your daughter. I get it.
Tim: This whole time, I was thinking about what I wanted, and not what she needed. I think I finally got this parenting thing figured out.

Ted: [referring to Armstrong] He’s planning a baby revolution.
Tim: Ah, come on. Just when I got good at this whole parenting thing.

Tina: You know what, BabyCorp? I quit! What a bunch of diaper sniffers.

Tina: Looks like we have to stop Armstrong ourselves.
Ted: We’re going rogue. I like it!

Tina: The photos will spread like a diaper rash.

Grandma (Janice): [referring to the kids pageant] This is kind of dark.
Grandpa (Ted Sr.): Did the kids just say we’re doomed?
Grandma (Janice): What the heck are we watching?

Pageant Mom 1: Your son is so talented.
Pageant Mom 2: Oh, so is yours.
Ted: Liars.

Ted: Look who’s worried about showing up for things all of a sudden.
Tim: What’s that supposed to mean?
Ted: You didn’t even come to my graduation!
Tim: Which one?
Ted: Business school, law school. None of them.
Tim: You didn’t even come to my wedding.
Ted: Which one?
Tim: I only had one!

Dr. Armstrong: Yeah, it was obvious from the very, very beginning that you two were working together.
Ted: What gave us away?
Dr. Armstrong: Well, I’d say the bickering, the petty disputes, the jealousy. You know, you two are brothers in every single way.

Tim: You’re right. I blew it. I ruined the mission. And I’m a terrible father.
Ted: Hey, you did sort of ruin the mission. But you’re a great dad.
Tim: No, I’m not.
Ted: I could never do your job. I mean, you work around the clock, you can’t even quit
if you wanted to, and you don’t even get paid. Frankly, I don’t see how that’s legal.

Tim: I was always jealous of you. I wanted to be successful too, you know.
Ted: Sure, Tim. I made a lot of money, but you made a family. The truth is, it’s lonely at the top.

Tim: I’m sorry that I missed your graduations.
Ted: I’m sorry I missed your one wedding.
Tim, Ted: I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.

Tina: Okay, we need to find the big whatchamacallit that controls the parents phones.
Tabitha: The server.
Tina: Yes. Yes. Is there a big one of those whatsits at school?

Dr. Armstrong: Well, you got grit. I’ll give you that. Gumption, even. Very admirable. And yet, annoying. Quite annoying. Yeah.

Dr. Armstrong: We could have been partners.
Ted: I’ve got something better than a partner. I have a brother.

Tina: Hands up, diapers down. Things are about to get weird.

Ted: Never touch another man’s pony.

Ted: It’s Night of the Living Boomers.

Dr. Armstrong: Back. Back, you little monsters.
Tina: You back off, candy pants.

Wizzie: You shall not pass! You shall not pass. No! Stop passing!

Dr. Armstrong: You’re smart. You’re strong. You don’t need parents. What can they possibly offer you?
Tina: How about unconditional love? That’s what.

Tim: I thought we both had to grow up.
Tabitha: Well, let’s not grow up too fast.

Tina: You know, Doc, childhood doesn’t last forever, but family sure does.

Tina: My real mission was getting you two back together. A-plus! See me after class.
Tim: Wait, so you never actually quit?
Tina: Nope.
Ted: Huh. Well played.

Tina: I don’t like to mix the two, but I will say it was never business. It was always personal.
Ted: You know what, kid? You’re the best boss I ever had.

Ted: [as Tim reads Ted’s note] I’m sorry I couldn’t be there with you, but please enjoy this inappropriately lavish gift instead. You’ve given me the greatest gift of all. You. Love, the best brother in the world.

Grandpa (Ted Sr.): [referring to Tim and Ted] Oh, isn’t it great to see them fighting again?
Grandma (Janice): Finally.

Tim: It’s true. You can’t stop time. But every once in a while, you get a second chance. So even though you’re only a kid once, well, unless you get to be a kid twice, which is really weird, to be honest, but the point is, you have to grow up sometime. And you should always
be nice to your brother.

Trailer:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8BZfBxTukc