Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, Randy Couture, Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson, Megan Fox, Tony Jaa, Iko Uwais, Jacob Scipio, Levy Tran, Andy Garcia
OUR RATING: ★★☆☆☆
Story:
Action adventure sequel directed by Scott Waugh. The Expendables 4 (2023) centers on the team of elite mercenaries. Armed with every weapon they can get their hands on and the skills to use them, The Expendables are the world’s last line of defense and the team that gets called when all other options are off the table. But new team members with new styles and tactics are going to give “new blood” a whole new meaning.
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Best Quotes
Gina: [to Christmas] You know what you actually are? A caveman.
Barney: You do resemble a caveman.
Gina: [to Christmas] Don’t tell me to f***ing calm down! I’m calm! I’ve never been more f***ing calm in my life. “Oh, look at me. I’m English. I’m avoidant. I don’t like to argue.” Well, guess what? I’m from America, b**ch. We’re going to fight about it.
Gina: I’m a professional.
Christmas: Yeah. And a little violent.
Barney: A little bit. Teeny bit.
Gina: You know what it is? I’ve got your skills, and then some. And neither of you like it because you’re both cavemen.
Christmas: She’s talking to you.
Barney: Actually, she’s looking in your direction.
Gina: [to Christmas] I’m talking to you.
Gina: [to Barney] But about you.
Gina: [to Barney] You might be my boss, but I can tell that you’re also from this planet called “hopeless”, where intimate relationships and feelings don’t f***ing exist!
Christmas: [to Barney] You are a loser. But I like you.
Gina: I’m sorry. Is that it? Are we done talking? Are you done with this conversation?
Christmas: Conversation? It’s more like angry chatter.
Gina: F*** you.
Barney: [to Christmas] She’s talking to you again.
Barney: Look, I got great respect for your uncanny abilities. I really do. But you are a selfish p**ck.
Christmas: Really?
Barney: We all are. We have to be to choose this life over friends, over family. We do this for money. That’s the definition of p**ckism. What do you think of my analysis? Pretty good?
Christmas: I think you’re a moron.
Barney: You don’t believe that.
Christmas: With every cell in my body.
Christmas: You used to be strong. What happened?
Barney: And you used to be hairy. What happened? Things change.
Christmas: What do you prefer to be called, “Jumbo” or “Shrimp”?
Jumbo Shrimp: Call me that again. Cut your f***ing head off.
Christmas: That’s a little harsh, bite-size.
Christmas: You see, what we have here is a matter of humiliation and human kindness. My friend here loves his ring for all of his stupid reasons. And it would be very nice and civilized if you gents would understand that principle. But since you choose to be… Barney, what’s the word?
Barney: Obstinate.
Christmas: Too long.
Barney: Dumbbells.
Christmas: Dumbbells. You leave me no other choice, dinky.
Christmas: Are my eyes deceiving me?
Barney: Why?
Christmas: What’s that thing on Gunner’s head?
Barney: It looks like a sick cat.
Christmas: Cats are cute. That looks like tumbleweed.
Christmas: What’s that thing on your head?
Gunner: Oh, the wig?
Barney: Yeah. The wig.
Christmas: Question is, why?
Gunner: Well, I was chatting with this girl on the Internet, and she likes that ’70s look, you know. The Farrah Fawcett thing.
Barney: Got it. You met her yet?
Gunner: Why would I do that? I like the mystery.
Easy Day: This our sniper?
Gunner: Don’t worry about it. I got a prescription scope.
Easy Day: What? Well, Hawkeyes, remember this face. Don’t shoot it by accident.
Toll Road: That’s Galgo’s son.
Galan: I have the eyesight, the heart, and the sex drive of my father.
Barney: Tell me he doesn’t talk as much as his father.
Toll Road: He’s worse.
Barney: How you doing, Marsh?
Marsh: How they hanging?
Barney: Gravity’s setting in.
Marsh: Welcome to the club.
Barney: It’s tune time. Time for music.
Christmas: [referring to the classical music] It’s ancient.
Barney: It’s soothing.
Christmas: You know, I had a panic attack last night.
Barney: Did you really? Are you sure?
Christmas: Yeah.
Barney: Like your skin starts to crawl? And your heart is beating?
Christmas: You know it.
Barney: Just take some Xanax and pretend you’re happy with your life.
Christmas: I am happy. By the way, you’re the worst doctor, ever.
Barney: Some guys are just not meant for companionship. Face the facts.
Christmas: Wrong. Maybe you want to die a bitter old sod, but not me. I want to be cheerful, happy. But I will come visit you in the home.
Barney: Promise?
Christmas: Scout’s honor.
Galan: [to Gunner] Hey, Stevie Wonder, you might want to get that prescription checked.
Christmas: Time to improvise.
Galan: I can improvise.
Christmas: Galan, what the f*** are you doing?
Galan: I’m improvising.
Toll Road: Initial success or total failure? Initial success.
Easy Day: I’m out of ammo. I’m coming in. You mean total failure.
'You used to be strong. What happened?' - Christmas, 'And you used to be hairy. What happened? Things change.' - Barney (The Expendables 4) Share on X
Toll Road: [after Barney is seemingly killed] There’s an old expression. Beware an old man in a profession where good men die young. I’m sure Barney Ross has had a seat reserved at the big table up there for some time now. And he earned that seat. He never stopped earning it. He brought the best out in each and every one of us because he was the best of us. To Barney.
Christmas: I was trying to save him, Marsh.
Marsh: Well, you didn’t. It’s our play. It’s our call. You’re out.
Easy Day: It was Barney’s sacrifice to make, brother. Good death for the mission, it would count. And you just took it from him. Made his sacrifice worthless.
Gunner: [to Easy] Nothing Barney did was worthless. You understand? Nothing!
Christmas: I want in. I’m coming with you.
Gina: Oh, I’m sorry. You weren’t invited.
Christmas: Oh. Well, won’t you be lonely without me?
Gina: No. There’s lots of other boys on the mission.
Gina: I’m not in the mood.
Christmas: I’m going to play a little Hendrix. Usually does the trick.
Gina: Don’t start.
Christmas: Oh, I’m starting.
Christmas: [referring to the tattoo on her back] Oh, I always liked this tattoo.
Gina: So did your brother.
Gina: [as she sits on top of him] This was always my favorite seat in the house.
Christmas: Well, these and the cheap seats.
Easy Day: Why do you think they call her Lash?
Toll Road: I have no idea. But I’d love to find out. She can lash me anytime.
Decha: I was once Decha, the man you seek. But I put that man behind me. If what you say is true, Barney should have his revenge.
Christmas: Damn right, he should.
Easy Day: Is that an axe?
Gunner: No, it’s a snow shovel.
Easy Day: That makes sense. Not for humanity, but for you it makes sense.
Decha: There’s only so many times you can kill a man, Christmas. Each time, it gets easier. You become numb to pain, to joy, and to love. With every person you kill, you lose a little more of yourself. I had to stop before there was nothing left.
Marsh: Got a bad feeling about this.
Lash: What a f***ing mess this turned out to be.
Christmas: I could use you.
Decha: I can’t. If I let the old me out, I don’t know if I could ever get him back in.
Christmas: I understand.
Merc: Who is this?
Christmas: A man who made a mistake letting you live. But I’m here to remedy that.
Rahmat: Ah. Look who’s still trying to be a hero.
Rahmat: My men are on their way to hunt you down. So I guess it’s up to me to put you in an early grave. Just like I did your friend in Libya.
Christmas: Correction. He wasn’t my friend. He was my brother. So you can bring your army. Bring all the f***ing men you want, and I’ll work through every last one of them. When I get to you, I’ll make sure that the only way you leave this ship is in a wonderful variety of pieces.
Christmas: I thought you were done with this life.
Decha: It would be disrespectful to Barney’s memory to let his friend die.
Toll Road: Well, that ain’t budging.
Easy Day: No s**t. It’s got to get wet.
Toll Road: What?
Easy Day: Wet. If it gets wet, it’ll open.
Gunner: Well, anybody got to pee?
Toll Road: I got to go. I’ve had to pi** since we HALO’d in here.
Galan: I do not speak, I cannot speak, because my mind is full of these brutal, visceral fantasies. Fantasies that will now become a hellish reality.
Easy Day: You should go back to not talking.
Decha: Your friends will be really happy to see you, right?
Christmas: Probably not. Gina will have to admit she needs me.
Gina: We’re going to stay quiet until it’s time to get loud.
Merc: [points his gun at them] Get on the ground!
Toll Road: Time to get loud?
Christmas: It’s you who needs to get down on the ground, pal.
Merc: Or what?
Christmas: [as he shoots the merc in the head] Or get wasted by an Expendable.
Gina: What took you so long? Did you think that I was going to believe you were actually just gifting me your knife?
Easy Day: You gifted her your knife?
Galan: And they say romance is dead.
Gina: He put a tracker in it. It was all part of the plan. Sorry.
Christmas: I feel a little used.
Gina: Well, can you make us something loud and messy?
Toll Road: Does the pope s**t in the woods?
Easy Day: No, the pope don’t s**t in the woods. Or next to a bear. Why you got to say s**t like that?
Rahmat: I see you like to play with knives.
Christmas: Well, I ain’t playing no more. You’re going to give me the kill switch, and we’re going to end all this.
Rahmat: Come and get it, hero.
Rahmat: [as Christmas stabs him with a knife] Is that the biggest one you’ve got?
Christmas: [as he uses the tomahawk] No. That’s the biggest one I got.
Marsh: [to Christmas] You’re like genital warts! Always showing up where you’re not wanted and refusing to go away!
Marsh: [to Christmas] I guess you figured out that this device right here is the only thing preventing World War III, a conflict that, while devastating for many, it’ll be insanely, insanely, insanely profitable for somebody. And that somebody is going to be me. And the Expendables will take all the blame! So, enjoy the show!
Lash: We need to get clear of this boat, or we’re all going to get fried!
Christmas: Jumping overboard is seeming like a decent plan right now.
Decha: I got an idea. We can take my boat. It’s being towed.
Christmas: That’s a great idea. Next time, let’s start with that!
Christmas: Mission first! I got to turn this ship around. Make my sacrifice count!
Easy Day: [to Gunner] It’s his decision to make.
Marsh: We need to get the ship back on course. Get up to the bridge and fix this.
Merc Captain: But, sir…
Marsh: But, sir, what?
Merc Captain: The nuke is going to blow. We can’t go up.
Marsh: [after he kills the merc captain] How do you feel about a promotion?
New Merc Captain: All to the bridge!
Marsh: I see you called in the cavalry! Well, you can’t get rid of me.
Christmas: Well, the fun’s in trying.
Marsh: Why don’t you come down face-to-face? Man-to-man.
Christmas: Old school. Don’t mind if I do. Can’t wait.
Marsh: Barney would be proud of you.
Christmas: Well, you can tell him yourself. Because you’re about to join him.
Marsh: So very nice. Look what Santa brought me.
[suddenly a chopper shows up and blasts down Marsh]
Christmas: Hey, I had him with the classics! You almost f***ing killed me!
Barney: You’re welcome!
Christmas: I need a drink.
Barney: Me too.
Christmas: You’re buying.
Barney: I’m broke.
Christmas: You know, you were funnier when you were dead.
Barney: Salute to my friends who never quit. Cheers to you all.
Gina: They’re all just jealous because you’re the most handsome one.
Christmas: I know.
Barney: Ain’t love beautiful?
Galan: Barney Ross, back from the dead. Only you could walk away from a blazing inferno with not a scratch on you. You are like a mythical bird raising up from the ashes. I don’t know how you do it.
Christmas: I need to know.
Barney: Who the corpse is?
Christmas: Exactly.
Barney: You ever wonder what happened to Jumbo Shrimp?
Christmas: You didn’t.
Barney: Oh, yes, I did.
