Starring: Dave Franco, Michael Peña, Justin Theroux, Jackie Chan, Kumail Nanjiani, Zach Woods, Fred Armisen, Abbi Jacobson, Olivia Munn
OUR RATING: ★★☆☆☆
Animated action-comedy directed by Charlie Bean. The Lego Ninjago Movie (2017) centers on young Master Builder Lloyd (Dave Franco), aka the Green Ninja, along with his friends, who are all secret ninja warriors, led by the wise Master Wu (Jackie Chan). When Lloyd’s dad, the evil warlord Garmadon (Justin Theroux) poses a threat to Ninjago City, and wants revenge on his brother, Wu, the young ninjas are tasked with defending their island home. Pitting mech against mech, and father against son, the epic showdown will test this fierce but undisciplined team of modern-day ninjas who must learn to check their egos and pull together to unleash their inner power of Spinjitzu.
Garmadon: Hello. What do you want?
Lloyd: You called me.
Garmadon: Hang on a second. I must have butt dialed you.
Garmadon: Who is this?
Lloyd: It’s Lloyd. Lloyd Garmadon, your son.
Garmadon: No. My son is totally bald and has no teeth.
Lloyd: Yeah, well, surprise. I’m not a baby anymore.
Garmadon: Duly noted.
Kid with Braces: [referring to Lloyd] That’s the kid I was telling you about. His dad ruins everything.
Chen the Cheerleader: Hey, everyone, look! It’s Garma-dork and the dork squad! You want to hear our new cheer?
Cheerleaders: L-L-O-Y-D. His dad is bad and so is he. Boo, Lloyd! Boo, Lloyd!
Chen the Cheerleader: Boo, Lloyd!
Lloyd: Great chant! I’ll bet you got a number one hit on your hands.
Garmadon: What’s my name?
Citizen Man: Garmadon!
Garmadon: Say it again!
Citizen Man: Garmadon!
Garmadon: I can’t hear you!
Citizen Mom: Garmadon!
Baby Citizen: Garmadon!
Garmadon: Don’t wear it out!
Kai, Jay, Zane, Lloyd, Nya, Koko: Can I have a bathroom pass?
Ms. Laudita: I think you mean, “May I”. “May I have a bathroom pass?” You know what? Do whatever you want.
Jay: As long as we have these mechs, we’re unstoppable!
Zane: If we were the Beatles, you would be John, you would be Paul, you would be George, and I would be their computer.
Nya: It’s okay, Lloyd. Nobody’s parents are perfect.
Jay: I mean, my mom is weird and collects seashells. Your dad levels cities and attacks innocent people. So, they’ve all got their quirks, you know?
Garmadon: You’re too slow, Green Ninja. You can’t catch me. Where am I? Am I over here? Or am I over there?
Lloyd: You are right behind that building. I can see your shark tail sticking out.
Garmadon: Oh, let me grab that.
Garmadon: Where’s Garmadon now? Am I over here, here, here? Or am I over there, there, there, there? It’s like a house of mirrors in here.
Lloyd: Do you think you’re hiding right now? Do you actually think I can’t see you?
Garmadon: Well, if you can see me, why don’t you shoot me? Ow! That was, like, in my kidney!
'Stay on the right path to find your inner peace.' - Master Wu (The Lego Ninjago Movie) Click To Tweet
General Omar: We got a message from your brother Garmadon. You want to hear it?
Master Wu: Oh, yeah? What did he say?
General Omar: He says you’re a big stupid dumb-dumb with a dumb face, and a big butt, and your butt stinks, and you smell like a butt.
Master Wu: That sounds like my brother.
Lloyd: That’s right! It’s me! Your son! And it’s Lloyd, Dad.
Garmadon: No. L-L-O-Y-D. I named you.
Lloyd: You ruined my life!
Garmadon: How could I ruin your life? I wasn’t even there.
Master Wu: You must follow the right path. Otherwise you will end up trapped in the deadly Jungle of Lost Souls, unable to cross the Bridge of Fallen Mentors, and mired in the Canyon of General Unhappiness. And if you’re still alive, you’ll be crushed by the Temple of Fragile Foundations. It’s a journey many have tried, and none have returned.
Lloyd: That does sound difficult.
Jay: And terrifying.
Master Wu: It will take great patience, courage, and hard work. All the skills of a true ninja master. So, I will make this journey on my own. Bye.
Master Wu: Students, true ninja knows when to fight and when to become one with the elements. Quickly, blend in the shadows.
Master Wu: [as the Ninjago team unsuccessfully hiding behind trees] You are all terrible ninjas.
'Even if you're different, you can still do great things.' - Master Wu (The Lego Ninjago Movie) Click To Tweet
Garmadon: La-Loyd, are you okay?
Lloyd: Yeah. Yeah! I think it was my arm. Is it bad?
Lloyd: I don’t want to look!
Garmadon: It looks okay, I guess.
Lloyd: Scale of one to ten, how bad is it?
Garmadon: Oh, I’d say it’s about a seven-point-arm-ripped-off.
Lloyd: I looked! I have no arm! I have no arm! No!
Garmadon: I told you it was bad.
Lloyd: Oh! That’s way worse than anything I could have thought! That’s bad!
Lloyd: Mom was a ninja?
Garmadon: That’s right. She was the most awesome ninja warrior I’d ever seen. I remember the first time I laid eyes on her. It was during a raging war. I was pillaging a peaceful village with my skeleton army when I spotted this beautiful warrior queen from across a crowded battlefield. She was fighting for good, and looking great doing it. Even as she decimated my evil forces, I couldn’t take my eyes off her. I was speechless. I summoned all my courage to approach her. I asked her if she fought here often. She said, “I do.” And let me tell you, La-Loyd. When our eyes met, sparks flew. It was love at first fight!
Lloyd: The Ultimate Ultimate Weapon is inside of you.
Jay, Nya: What?
Lloyd: Yes, you have the power. Look within. Harness what you already have inside and let it out.