Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Tom Hiddleston, Cate Blanchett, Idris Elba, Jeff Goldblum, Tessa Thompson, Karl Urban, Mark Ruffalo, Anthony Hopkins, Benedict Cumberbatch, Sam Neill
OUR RATING: ★★★½
Story:
MCU superhero sequel is directed by Taika Waititi. Thor: Ragnarok (2017) follows Thor (Chris Hemsworth) who is imprisoned on the other side of the universe without his hammer. He must win a gladiatorial duel against his former ally and fellow Avenger the Hulk (Mark Ruffalo) in order to return to Asgard to stop Ragnarok, the destruction of his homeworld, and the end of Asgardian civilization at the hands of the ruthless and all-powerful Hela (Cate Blanchett).
Our Favorite Quote:
'I choose to run toward my problems and not away from them. Because that's what heroes do.' - Thor (Thor: Ragnarok) Click To Tweet
Best Quotes
Thor: Now, I know what you’re thinking. “Oh, no! Thor’s in a cage. How did this happen?” Well, sometimes you have to get captured just to get a straight answer out of somebody. It’s a long story, but basically, I’m a bit of a hero. See, I spent some time on Earth. Fought some robots, saved the planet a couple of times. Then I went searching through the cosmos for some magic,colorful Infinity Stone things. Didn’t find any. That’s when I came across a path of death and destruction, which led me all the way here into this cage, where I met you.
[we see him looking at a skeleton]
Surtur: You cannot stop Ragnarok. Why fight it?
Thor: Because that’s what heroes do.
Loki: [referring to Odin] I swear I left him right here.
Thor: Right here on the sidewalk, or right there where the building is being demolished? Great planning.
Loki: How was I supposed to know? I can’t see into the future. I’m not a witch.
Thor: No? Then why do you dress like one?
Thor: So, Earth has wizards now?
Dr. Stephen Strange: The preferred term is Master of the Mystic Arts.
[as Thor accidentally destroys a relic]
Dr. Stephen Strange: You can leave that now.
Thor: Alright, wizard. Who are you? Why should I care?
Dr. Stephen Strange: My name is Doctor Stephen Strange, and I have some questions for you. Take a seat.
Thor: Tea? I don’t drink tea.
Dr. Stephen Strange: What do you drink?
Thor: Not tea.
Dr. Stephen Strange: So, I keep a watch list of individuals and beings from other realms that may be a threat to this world. Your adopted brother, Loki, is one of those beings. He’s a worthy inclusion.
Thor: Then why bring him here? We’re looking for my father.
Dr. Stephen Strange: So, if I were to tell you where Odin was, all parties concerned would promptly return to Asgard?
Thor: Promptly.
Dr. Stephen Strange: Great! Then I’ll help you.
Thor: If you knew where he was, why didn’t you call me?
Dr. Stephen Strange: I have to tell you, he was adamant that he not be disturbed. Your father said he had chosen to remain in exile. And you don’t have a phone.
Thor: No, I don’t have a phone, but you could have sent an electronic letter. It’s called an email.
Dr. Stephen Strange: Yeah, do you have a computer?
Thor: No. What for?
Dr. Stephen Strange: Thor, I sense a great change in your future. Destiny has dire plans for you, my friend.
Thor: I have dire plans for destiny.
Loki: I have been falling, for thirty minutes!
Dr. Stephen Strange: [referring to Loki] You can handle him from here.
Thor: Yes. Of course. Thank you very much for your help.
Dr. Stephen Strange: Good luck.
Loki: Handle me? Who are you?
Thor: Loki.
Loki: You think you’re some kind of sorcerer? Don’t think for one minute, you second-rate…
Dr. Stephen Strange: Bye-bye.
Hela: Oh, I’ve missed this.
Hela: Asgard is dead, and it’ll be reborn in my image.
Hela: I thought you’d be glad to see me.
Grandmaster: What happened to my manners? I haven’t properly introduced myself. Come on. Follow me. My name is Grandmaster. I preside over a little harlequinade called the Contest of Champions. People come from far and wide to unwillingly participate in it. And you, my friend, might just be part of the new cast. What do you say to that?
Thor: We’re not friends and I don’t give a s**t about your games. I’m going back to Asgard.
Grandmaster: Ass-gard.
Korg: [to Thor] Hey. Take it easy, man. Over here. The pile of rocks waving at you. Here. Yeah, I’m actually a thing. I’m a being. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Korg. I’m kind of like the leader in here. I’m made of rocks, as you can see. But don’t let that intimidate you. You don’t need to be afraid unless you’re made of scissors. Just a little rock-paper-scissor joke for you.
Grandmaster: Hey, Sparkles, here’s the deal. If you want to get back to Ass-place, Assberg…
Thor: Asgard.
Grandmaster: Any contender who defeats my champion, their freedom they shall win.
Thor: Fine. Then point me in the direction of whoever’s ass I have to kick!
Grandmaster: That’s what I call, contender.
Thor: How did you end up here?
Korg: Well, I tried to start a revolution, but didn’t print enough pamphlets. So hardly anyone turned up, except for my mum and her boyfriend, who I hate. As punishment, I was forced to be in here and become a gladiator. Bit of a promotional disaster, that one. But I’m actually organizing another revolution. I don’t know if you’d be interested in something like that. Do you reckon you’d be interested?
Thor: I really wish I had my hammer.
Korg: Hammer?
Thor: Quite unique. It was made from this special metal from the heart of a dying star. And when I spun it really, really fast, it gave me the ability to fly.
Korg: You rode a hammer?
Thor: No, I didn’t ride the hammer.
Korg: The hammer rode you on your back?
Thor: No. I used to spin it really fast, and it would pull me off the…
Korg: Oh, my God. A hammer pulled you off?
Thor: The ground. It would pull me off the ground, up into the air, and I would fly. Every time I threw it, it would always come back to me.
Korg: Sounds like you had a pretty special and intimate relationship with this hammer and that losing it was almost comparable to losing a loved one.
Thor: That’s a nice way of putting it.
Thor: [to Valkyrie] My God, you’re a Valkyrie. I used to want to be a Valkyrie when I was younger, until I found out that you were all women. There’s nothing wrong with women, of course. I love women. Sometimes a little too much. Not in a creepy way, just more of a respectful appreciation. I think it’s great that there is an elite force of women warriors.
Barber: Now, don’t you move. My hands ain’t as steady as they used to be.
Thor: By Odin’s beard, you shall not cut my hair, lest you feel the wrath of the mighty Thor.
[starting to feel nervous]
Thor: Please. Please, kind sir, do not cut my hair. Please! No! No!
Grandmaster: Ladies and gentlemen, this is what you’ve come for. It’s main event time.
Grandmaster: And now, I give your Incredible Hulk!
[we see Hulk burst through stadium wall and roar]
Thor: Yes!
[the crowd suddenly goes quiet]
Thor: I have to get off this planet. Hey, hey, hey. Where you going? Hey!
Thor: [referring to Hulk] We know each other! He’s a friend from work! Where have you been? Everybody thought you were dead. So much has happened since I last saw you. I lost my hammer, like yesterday, so that’s still pretty fresh. Loki, Loki’s alive. Can you believe it? He’s up there.
[shouting up at Loki]
Thor: Loki, look who it is?
Thor: Hela is ravenous. If I let her leave, she’ll consume Nine Realms and all the cosmos.
Heimdall: We need you.
Thor: I’m working on it. But I don’t even know where the hell I am.
Heimdall: You’re on a planet surrounded by doorways. Go through one.
Thor: Which one?
Heimdall: The big one.
Thor: I’m sorry I said those things. You’re not the stupid Avenger. Nobody calls you the stupid Avenger.
Hulk: It’s okay.
Thor: You just can’t go around throwing shields at people. Could have killed me.
Hulk: I know. I’m sorry. I just get so angry all the time. Hulk always, always angry.
Thor: I know. We’re the same, you and I. We’re just a couple of hot-headed fools.
Hulk: Yeah, same. Hulk like fire, Thor like water.
Thor: We’re kind of both like fire.
Hulk: But Hulk like real fire. Hulk like raging fire. Thor like smoldering fire.
Thor: [to Valkyrie] You know, go ahead. Stay here and enslave people for that lunatic. Keep drinking, keep hiding. But me, I choose to run toward my problems and not away from them. Because that’s what heroes do.
Quinjet Computer: Welcome. Voice activation required.
Thor: Thor.
Quinjet Computer: Access denied.
Thor: Thor, son of Odin.
Quinjet Computer: Access denied.
Thor: God of Thunder.
Quinjet Computer: Access denied.
Thor: Strongest Avenger.
Quinjet Computer: Access denied.
Thor: Strongest Avenger.
Quinjet Computer: Access denied.
Thor: Damn you, Stark. Point Break.
Quinjet Computer: Welcome, Point Break.
Bruce Banner: What happened to your hair?
Thor: Some creepy old man cut it off.
Bruce Banner: It looks good.
Thor: Thanks.
Quinjet Computer: [after Thor has failed to activate the Quinjet computer] Voice activation required.
Bruce Banner: Banner.
Quinjet Computer: Welcome, Strongest Avenger.
Thor: Quite a lot’s happened. You and I had a fight recently.
Bruce Banner: Did I win?
Thor: No, I won. Easily.
Bruce Banner: That doesn’t sound right.
Thor: Well, it’s true.
Bruce Banner: I’m not fighting any more beings. I’m sick of it.
Thor: What?
Bruce Banner: I just told you. If I turn into the Hulk, I am never going to come back again. And you don’t care.
Thor: No, no. I’m putting together the team. The Hulk is the fire.
Bruce Banner: Wait, you’re just using me to get to the Hulk.
Thor: What? No!
Bruce Banner: It’s gross. You don’t care about me. You’re not my friend.
Thor: No! I don’t even like the Hulk. He’s all like, “Smash, smash, smash.” I prefer you.
Bruce Banner: Thanks.
Thor: But if I’m being honest, when it comes to fighting evil beings, he is very powerful and useful.
Bruce Banner: [points to his brain] Biggest muscle in the body.
Thor: I’ve got more muscle, so technically more brains.
Valkyrie: Look, I’ve spent years in a haze, trying to forget my past. Sakaar seemed like the best place to drink and forget, and to die one day.
Thor: I was thinking that you drink too much, and that probably was going to kill you.
Valkyrie: I don’t plan to stop drinking. But I don’t want to forget. I can’t turn away anymore, so if I’m going to die, well, it may as well be driving my sword through the heart of that murderous hag.
Thor: Good.
Valkyrie: Yeah. So, I’m saying that I want to be on the team. Has it got a name?
Thor: Yeah, it’s called the Revengers.
Valkyrie: Revengers?
Thor: Because I’m getting revenge. You’re getting revenge. Do you want revenge?
Valkyrie: I’m undecided.
Loki: Hello, Bruce.
Bruce Banner: So, last time I saw you, you were trying to kill everybody. Where are you at these days?
Loki: It varies from moment to moment.
Bruce Banner: [referring to Loki] I was just talking to him just a couple minutes ago and he was totally ready to kill any of us.
Valkyrie: He did try to kill me.
Thor: Yes, me too. On many, many occasions. There was one time when we were children, he transformed himself into a snake, and he knows that I love snakes. So, I went to pick up the snake to admire it, and he transformed back into himself and he was like, “Yeah, it’s me!” And he stabbed me. We were eight at the time.
Thor: Loki, I thought the world of you. I thought we were going to fight side by side forever. But at the end of the day, you’re you and I’m me. I don’t know, maybe there’s still good in you. But let’s be honest, our paths diverged a long time ago.
Loki: Yeah. It’s probably for the best that we never see each other again.
Thor: It’s what you always wanted.
Thor: Hey, let’s do “Get Help”.
Loki: What?
Thor: “Get Help”.
Loki: No.
Thor: Come on, you love it.
Loki: I hate it.
Thor: It’s great. It works every time.
Loki: It’s humiliating.
Thor: Do you have a better plan?
Loki: No.
Thor: We’re doing it.
Loki: We are not doing “Get Help”.
[we see Thor carrying Loki out of the elevator]
Thor: Get help! Please! My brother, he’s dying. Get help! Help him!
[as the guards approach them, Thor throws Loki at them, knocking them down]
Thor: Classic.
Loki: Still hate it. It’s humiliating.
Thor: Not for me, it’s not.
Hela: [to Thor] It’s a valiant effort, but you never stood a chance. You see, I’m not a queen or a monster. I’m the Goddess of Death. What were you the god of, again?
Odin: Even when you had two eyes, you’d see only half the picture.
Thor: [referring to Hela] She’s too strong. Without my hammer, I can’t.
Odin: Are you Thor, the God of Hammers? That hammer was to help you control your power, to focus it. It was never your source of strength.
Thor: It’s too late. She’s already taken Asgard.
Odin: Asgard is not a place. Never was. This could be Asgard. Asgard is where our people stand. Even now, right now, those people need your help.
Thor: I’m not as strong as you.
Odin: No. You’re stronger.
Thor: I think we should disband the Revengers.
Loki: Hit her with a lightning blast.
Thor: I just hit her with the biggest lightning blast in the history of lightning. It did nothing.
Valkyrie: We just need to hold her off until everyone’s on board.
Thor: It won’t end there. The longer Hela’s on Asgard, the more powerful she grows. She’ll hunt us down. We need to stop her here and now.
Valkyrie: So what do we do?
Loki: I’m not doing “Get Help”.
Thor: No! Hulk, stop, you moron! Hulk, stop. Just for once in your life, don’t smash!
Hulk: Big monster!
Thor: Let’s go!
Hulk: Fine.
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