Starring: Woody Harrelson, Jesse Eisenberg, Emma Stone, Abigail Breslin, Rosario Dawson, Zoey Deutch, Luke Wilson, Bill Murray, Avan Jogia,, Thomas Middleditch, Dan Aykroyd
Comedy horror sequel directed by Ruben Fleischer. The story follows Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg), Tallahasse (Woody Harrelson), Wichita, (Emma Stone), and Little Rock (Abigail Breslin), who move to the American heartland as they face off against evolved zombies, fellow survivors, and the growing pains of the snarky makeshift family.
Columbus: [voice over] Welcome to Zombieland. Life is about more than just survival. We were a family. Dysfunctional, sure, but what family isn’t.
Tallahassee: It’s time to nut up or shut up.
[as Tallahassee sits in the President’s chair in the White House]
Columbus: Sorry, just you in that chair.
Tallahassee: I think I would have made a damn fine president.
Wichita: You would have brought a real dignity to the office.
Tallahassee: You’re welcome, America.
[wearing a Santa outfit and fake beard]
Tallahassee: Merry Christmas. What would you like, little girl?
Little Rock: I’d really like for you to stop calling me “little girl”.
[sits down on Tallahassee’s knee]
Columbus: Do you know what I would like?
Tallahassee: I don’t give a shit what you’d like.
[pushes Columbus off his knee]
Wichita: It felt so good to be on the move again.
[after shooting at Madison, thinking she’s a zombie]
Columbus: Oh, my God. I’m so sorry. I’m Columbus.
Columbus: This is Tallahassee.
[turns to Tallahassee]
Madison: Hey, Paul Blart. Is this your dad?
[as Tallahassee breaks hard, Madison is thrown to the front, hitting her head on the dashboard]
Madison: Oh! Whoopsie. I forgot the seatbelt rule.
Wichita: Oh, so she knows the rules?
Columbus: I told her just a few of them.
Madison: Seventy-three. Are there more.
Wichita: You’re cute. I like it.
Little Rock: You don’t have weed, do you?
Berkeley: Do I look like the type of person that would have weed?
Little Rock: I’m sorry.
[suddenly he holds up a giant bag of weed]
Berkeley: Boom! Yeah!
[referring to Little Rock]
Wichita: My sister is gone. She picked up a boy. He’s from Berkeley.
Tallahassee: I have nothing against hippies. I just want to beat the shit out of them.
[referring to Little Rock.]
Tallahassee: We’re going to go get her. We ride at dawn
[pointing a gun at Tallahassee]
Nevada: Start talking.
Tallahassee: You first.
[she cocks her gun]
Tallahassee: My name’s Tallahassee.
Tallahassee: No! That’s my ride!
[referring to Tallahassee dressed as Elvis]
Tallahassee Lookalike: Oh, my apologies, Little Elvis.
Tallahassee: Is it me, or does he kind of remind you of…
[Tallahassee and his lookalike are looking at each other]
Together: I don’t like you, at all.
[just then a man, resembling Columbus comes over]
Columbus Lookalike: I think you double parked, or more, perpendicular parked. I hope we don’t get a ticket.
Wichita: What is going on here?
Columbus Lookalike: Hello, everyone.
Wichita: Am I hallucinating?
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