Here is our list of the best quotes from all of the animated comedy Despicable Me movies, including the Minions, following the lovable reformed supervillain, Gru, and his yellow-colored Minions. Here we go…
1. Despicable Me (2010)
The first installment follows supervillain, Gru (Steve Carell), who adopts three orphans girls, Margo, Edith, and Agnes (Miranda Cosgrove, Dana Gaier, and Elsie Fisher), to try and steal a shrink ray from his rival, Vector (Jason Segel), to carry out the biggest heist in history, to shrink and steal Earth’s moon. But despite Gru’s villainous intentions, he grows increasingly touched by the girls’ growing love for him and finds himself changing for the better.
Gru: Hello, Fred. FYI, your dog has been leaving little bombs all over my yard, and I don’t
Fred McDade: [laughs] Sorry. You know dogs. They go wherever they want to go.
Gru: Unless they’re dead.
Gru: I’m joking! Although, it is true. Anyway, have a good one.
Gru: You’ve got to be pulling on my leg!
Gru: Minions, assemble!
Dr. Nefario: I’ve been crunching some numbers, and I really don’t see how we can afford this. It can’t be done! I’m not a miracle worker!
Gru: Hey, chillax. I’ll just get another loan from the bank. They love me!
Gru: Ma, someday I’m going to go to the moon.
Gru’s Mom: I’m afraid you’re too late, son. NASA isn’t sending the monkeys anymore.
Vector: [to Gru] I’m applying for a new villain loan. Go by the name of Vector. It’s a mathematical term, a quantity represented by an arrow, with both direction and magnitude. Vector! That’s me, because I’m committing crimes with both direction and magnitude. Oh, yeah!
Gru: So, all I need is money from the bank to build a rocket. And then, the moon is ours.
Mr. Perkins: Wow. Well, very nice presentation. I’d like to see this shrink ray.
Gru: Absolutely. Will do. Soon as I have it.
Mr. Perkins: You don’t have it? And yet you have the audacity to ask the bank for money?
[as he’s trying to adopt the Margo, Edith, and Agnes]
Gru: Well, here’s the dealio. Things have been so lonely since my wife, Debbie, passed on. It’s like my heart is a tooth, and it’s got a cavity that can only be filled with children.
Gru: You are a beautiful woman. Do you speak Spanish?
Miss Hattie: Do I look like I speak Spanish?
Gru: You have a face, como un burro.
Miss Hattie: Oh! Well, thank you!
Edith: When we got adopted by a bald guy, I thought this would be more like Annie.
Gru: Uh, question. What are these?
Dr. Nefario: A dozen boogie robots! Boogie! Look at this. Watch me!
[Gru takes the controls from Nefario and stops the music]
Gru: Cookie robots. I said cookie robots. Why are you so old?
Edith: Can I drink this?
Dr. Nefario: Do you want to explode?
Edith: Are these beds made out of bombs?
Gru: Yes, but they are very old and highly unlikely to blow up. But try not to toss and turn.
Agnes: Will you read us a bedtime story?
Agnes: But we can’t go to sleep without a bedtime story.
Gru: Well, then it’s going to be a long night for you, isn’t it? So, good night, sleep tight, and don’t let the bed bugs bite. Because there are literally thousands of them.
[taking the girls to sell cookies to Vector]
Gru: Alright. Our first customer is a man named Vector.
Margo: But he’s a V. You know, we’re supposed to start with the A’s. Then we go to the B’s. Then we…
Gru: Yes! Yes! I went to kindergarten. I know how the alphabet works!
Agnes: Why are you wearing pajamas?
Vector: These aren’t pajamas! This is a warm-up suit.
Edith: What are you warming up for?
Margo: What sort of stuff?
Vector: Super-cool stuff you wouldn’t understand.
Agnes: Like sleeping?
Vector: They are not pajamas!
[showing Perkins his plan for stealing the moon]
Gru: Now, the rest of the plan is simple. I fly to the moon. I shrink the moon. I grab the moon. I sit on the toilet. Wait, what?
[sees a child’s drawing in his plans of himself sitting on a toilet bowl]
Gru: Sorry. Sorry! Could you excuse me for just one second?
[continuing to show Perkins his plans for stealing the moon]
Gru: As I was saying…
Mr. Perkins: No need to continue. I’ve seen quite enough.
Gru: But my plan…
Mr. Perkins: Is a great plan. I love everything about your plan. Except for one thing. You.
[after Perkins rejects his plan, Gru has flashback to when he’s young]
Young Gru: Look, mom, I drew a picture of me landing on the moon.
Gru’s Mom: Eh.
Young Gru: Look, mom, I made a prototype of the rocket out of macaroni.
Gru’s Mom: Eh.
Young Gru: Look, mom, I made a real rocket based on the macaroni prototype.
[Gru fires the rocket]
Gru’s Mom: Eh.
Gru: [to the minions] Now, I know there have been some rumors going around that the bank is no longer funding us. Well, I am here to put those rumors to rest. They are true. In terms of money, we have no money. So how will we get to the moon? The answer is clear. We won’t.
Gru: [to the minions] We are doomed. Now would probably be a good time to look for other employment options. I know. I have fired up my resume, as I suggest that all of you do as well.
[as the girls interrupt him]
Gru: What is it? Can’t you see that I am in the middle of a pep talk?
Gru: Did you brush your teeth? Let me smell. Let me smell.
[he takes a whiff]
Gru: You did not!
Agnes: Will you read us a bedtime story?
Agnes: Pretty please!
Gru: The physical appearance of the “please” makes no difference. It is still no, so go to sleep.
[as he’s about to read a bedtime story to the girls]
Gru: Alright, alright. “Sleepy Kittens”. Sleepy Kittens? What are these?
Agnes: Puppets. You use them when you tell the story.
Gru: Okay, let’s get this over with. “Three little kittens loved to play, they had fun in the sun all day. Then their mother came out and said, ‘Time for kittens to go to bed.'” Wow! This is garbage. You actually like this?
[referring to the bedtime story]
Gru: This is literature? A two year-old could have written this.
Agnes: I like him. He’s nice.
Edith: But scary.
Agnes: Like Santa.
Gru: Miss Hattie, what are you doing here?
Miss Hattie: I’m here for the girls. I received a call that you wanted to return them. And also, I did purchase a Spanish dictionary.
[hits Gru in the face with the dictionary]
Miss Hattie: I didn’t like what you said.
Margo: You gave us back!
Gru: I know! I know. And it is the worst mistake I ever made!
Gru: Okay, girls. Time for bed.
Edith: Oh, come on! We want a story.
Agnes: Three Sleepy Kittens!
Gru: Oh, no! Sorry. That book was accidentally destroyed maliciously.
[referring to Gru’s bedtime story book]
Agnes: Hey, that one looks like me.
Gru: No, what are you talking about? These are kittens. Any relation to persons living or dead is completely coincidental.
[reading from the bedtime story book that he’s written for the girls]
Gru: “They made him laugh. They made him cry. He never should have said good-bye. And now he knows he could never part from those three little kittens that changed his heart.” The end.
[after finally kissing all the girls goodnight, Margo hugs him]
Margo: I love you.
Gru: Yeah, I love you too.
[as they are watching the girls do their ballet recitle]
Gru’s Mom: Ah, I’m so proud of you, son. You’ve turned out to be a great parent. Just like me. Maybe even better.
2. Despicable Me 2 (2013)
This sequel follows Gru, who is now an ex-supervillain and adjusting to family life with an attempt at honest living in the jam business. When a secret Arctic laboratory is stolen, Gru is hired by the Anti-Villain League and partnered with the eccentric AVL agent, Lucy Wilde (Kristen Wiig) to track down the criminal, with prime suspect being the presumed dead supervillain, El Macho (Benjamin Bratt).
[dressed as a fairy at Agnes’s birthday party; in high pitched voice]
Gru: It is I, Gruzinkerbell, the most magical fairy princess of all! And I am here to wish Princess Agnes a very happy birthday!
Young Boy: How come you’re so fat?
Gru: Because my house is made of candy, and sometimes I eat instead of facing my problems!
Lucy: Hi! Agent Lucy Wilde of the AVL.
[sees she’s holding up her badge upside down]
Lucy: Oh, whoops! Sorry, you’re going to have to come with me.
Gru: Oh, sorry, I… Freeze ray!
[as Gru whips out his weapon, at the same time Lucy uses hers weapon to overpower his]
Lucy: You know, you really should announce your weapons after you fire them, Mr. Gru. For example.
[she uses her lipstick taser on Gru]
Lucy: Lipstick taser! Oh, it works so good.
Silas Ramsbottom: I am the League’s director, Silas Ramsbottom.
Minion: [giggles] Bottom.
[the two minions laugh]
Silas Ramsbottom: Hilarious.
[as Ramsbottom and Lucy are trying to recuit him to the AVL]
Gru: Okay! I see where this is going, with all the Mission: Impossible stuff. But, no. No! I’m a father now. And a legitimate businessman. I am developing a line of delicious jams and jellies.
Silas Ramsbottom: [chuckles] Jams and jellies?
Gru: Oh, attitude! That’s right! So, thanks, but no thanks. And here’s a tip, instead of tasing people and kidnapping them, maybe you should just give them a call! Good day, Mr. Sheepsbutt.
Silas Ramsbottom: Ramsbottom.
Gru: [chuckles] Oh, yeah. Like that’s any better.
Gru: Good night, Margo. Woh, woh, woh. Hold the horses. Who are you texting?
Margo: No one. Just my friend Avery.
Gru: Avery. Avery? Is that a girl’s name, or a boy’s name?
Margo: Does it matter?
Gru: No. No, it doesn’t matter, unless it’s a boy!
Agnes: I know what makes you a boy.
Gru: Uh, ooh, you do?
Agnes: Your bald head.
Gru: Oh, yes. It’s really smooth. Sometimes I stare at it, and imagine a little chick popping out.
[imitates a chick]
Gru: Good night, Agnes.
[he kisses her forehead]
Gru: Never get older.
Gru: [to Nefario] Just because everybody hates it, it doesn’t mean it’s not good.
Dr. Nefario: I miss being evil. Sinister plots, large-scale crimes, it’s what I live for! I mean, don’t you think there’s more to our future than jelly?
Gru: Well, I’m also considering a line of jams.
Gru: Let us give you the proper send-off. Minions! The highest honor awarded to Dr. Nefario for your years of service, the twenty-one fart gun salute!
[the minions fire the fart guns]
Dr. Nefario: Uh, I counted twenty-two.
Dr. Nefario: Farewell, my friends.
[his flying scooter starts rising very slowly]
Dr. Nefario: This may take a while. Go about your business. I miss you already!
Margo: Hey, what celebrity do you look like?
Gru: Uh, Bruce Willis.
Margo: Mm, no.
Agnes: Humpty Dumpty!
Edith: Ooh, Gollum!
[the girls laugh]
Gru: Okay, what are you doing?
Agnes: We’re signing you up for online dating!
Gru: Oh, okay. What?! No, no, no, no, no!
Edith: Oh, come on. It’s fun.
Margo: And it’s time for you to get out there.
Gru: No! Stop! No one is ever getting out there! Ever!
[to Agnes as she’s practicing her lines for the Mother’s Day play]
Gru: Wow! That was something else. I really liked the way you smiled at the end. Let’s try this one more time, but a teensy bit less like a zombie, okay?
[referring to the Mother’s Day play]
Agnes: I don’t think I should do this.
Gru: Well, what do you mean? Why not?
Agnes: I don’t even have a mom.
Gru: Well, you don’t need one to do the show. I mean, you did the Veterans Day Pageant, and you haven’t been in combat.
Floyd Eagle-san: It’s about time you showed up, Mr. Gru.
Gru: You know my name?
Floyd Eagle-san: When someone moves into the mall who is folically-challenged, I make it my business to know all about them. You are bald, and that is bad.
Antonio Pérez: And my dream is to one day play video games for a living.
Margo: Wow. You’re so complicated.
[catches Antonio with Margo]
Gru: Margo, what is going on here?
Margo: Oh, Gru. Se llama, Antonio. Me llamo, Margo.
Gru: Me llama-lama ding-dong. Who cares? Let’s go.
[Jillian rings the front doorbell]
Jillian: Gru, it’s Jillian! I’ve got good news! I have my friend Shannon here with me. I was thinking you two could get some grub. You know, tear it up, see what happens! Open up!
Gru: [whispers] Agnes! Agnes, tell Jillian I’m not here.
Agnes: Gru’s not here!
Jillian: Are you sure?
Agnes: Yes, he just told me!
Gru: [cringes] Mm-mm!
Agnes: I mean, no, he didn’t just tell me.
Jillian: [laughs] Agnes, where is Gru?
[Gru makes various hand gestures to Agnes]
Agnes: He’s putting on lipstick! He’s swatting at flies! He’s chopping his head off! He’s pooping?
Jillian: I know you’re in there, Gru! There’s no way you’re getting out of this!
Gru: And now you’re going to Australia?
Lucy: Well, it’s not definite yet. I’m still figuring it out. I’ve already been working on my accent.
[in Australian accent]
Lucy: Wallaby. Didgeridoo. Hugh Jackman.
[practicing to call Lucy to ask her out on a date]
Gru: Hello, Lucy. This is Gru. I know up to this point our relationship has been strictly professional, and you’re leaving for Australia and all, but, okay, here is the question. Would you like to go out on a date?
[looks up to see a minion dressed up to look like Lucy holding a phone]
Minion: Uh, no.
Gru: Okay, that’s not helping. Alright, here we go. For real this time. I can do this.
[stares at the phone trying to force himself to call Lucy; to the telephone]
Gru: Aah! I hate you!
[set fire to the telephone]
Gru: Hey, what’s wrong?
Margo: I hate boys.
Gru: Yes. They stink.
Gru: Listen, Lucy, we may not get out of this alive. So I need to ask you a question.
Lucy: Uh, better make it quick.
Gru: If I had asked you out on a date, what would you have said?
Lucy: Are you kidding me? Yes!
[toasting Gru and Lucy at their wedding]
Agnes: To the bride and Gru!
3. Despicable Me 3 (2017)
Third installment follows Gru, who after being fired from the Anti-Villain League, finds himself in the midst of a major identity crisis. But after he finds out that he has a long-lost twin brother, Dru, they team up to defeat a new villain, Balthazar Bratt (Trey Parker), a former child actor, obsessed with the ‘80s.
Balthazar Bratt: You know what, Clive? Playing a villain on TV was fun, but being one in real life is even better! Heist music!
Clive the Robot: Here it comes.
[“Take My Breath Away” starts playing]
Balthazar Bratt: What? Clive, what are you doing? How is that heist music?!
Clive the Robot: Sorry. My bad.
Agent: Sir, the ship has been boarded by some kind of monster!
Silas Ramsbottom: Wait, that’s not a monster. That’s a man wearing shoulder pads! There’s only one supervillain whose fashion sense is quite that dated. Balthazar Bratt. Blast it! The Dumont Diamond is on that ship.
Silas Ramsbottom: I want every agent in the area on the scene immediately!
Lucy: We’re already here. Agents Grucy are closing fast.
Gru: Yes! Wait. What did you call us?
Lucy: Grucy. You know, Gru and Lucy mushed together. Try it.
Gru: Oh! I like it, but not a lot. I don’t like it.
Valerie Da Vinci: How could you let Balthazar Bratt, the AVL’s most wanted villain, just get away? That is the opposite of what we do here!
Gru: Okay! Okay! Yes, maybe he got away! Again. But he didn’t get the diamond. And I am this close to bringing him in. This close.
Valerie Da Vinci: Huh. Interesting. You’re fired!
Lucy: That’s totally not fair. Gru is a great agent! You know what? If you fire him, you’re going to have to fire me, sister-sister. And do you really want to do that? Do you?
[we see them both being thrown off the AVL aircraft]
Gru, Lucy: No, no, no, no!
Lucy: Well, I guess she did.
Agnes: The soup of the day, Madame and Monsieur. The gummy bears were my idea.
Gru: [warily] Mmm! Looks too good to even eat. Am I right?
Agnes: But I made it for you.
[takes a spoonful and tries to not retch]
Gru: Mmm-mmm-mmm! Good soup! I love the combination of gummy bears and meat.
[Agnes looks at Lucy, who takes a spoonful and also tries not to retch]
Lucy: I’m going to hold it in my mouth. Because it’s so good, I don’t want to swallow it.
Margo: You got fired?
Gru: Oh, no! No, no, no, no, no. Yes.
Lucy: But don’t worry. I’m sure we’ll get new jobs, real soon. Even better ones.
Edith: What’s better than being super-cool secret agents?
Agnes: Ooh, I know! You could gamble online! That’s what Katie’s dad does.
Gru: Okay. We will definitely look into that. That’s a good suggestion. And let’s not go over to Katie’s house anymore.
Gru: Agnes, what are you doing? You sold your unicorn?
Agnes: Well, I just wanted to help, since you don’t have a job. I got two whole dollars for it.
Gru: Mom, do I have a twin brother?
Gru’s Mom: Ah! How did you find out? Who told you?
Gru: Wait, what? It’s true? You never told me I had a brother! And you told me that dad died of disappointment when I was born!
Gru’s Mom: Ja, ja. That was the agreement.
Gru: Agreement? What are you talking about?
Gru’s Mom: Shortly after you and your brother were born, your father and I divorced. We each took one son to raise on our own, and promised never to see each other again. Obviously, I got second pick.
Gru: I have a brother.
[as they enter Dru’s mansion]
Lucy: Oh, this is amazing! Ah, it’s like the Sistine Chapel! But with pigs.
Dru: And Margo. Oh, you are so mature! I’m guessing, what, mmm, fifteen?
Gru: She’s twelve. She looks twelve, and will always be twelve!
[after they’ve just arrived and met Dru]
Gru: Alright, let’s go home now.
Lucy: Home? Why?
Gru: I don’t know! This guy with the mansion, and the cars, and all of the hair, with the silky smooth luxurious hair. I feel worse than I did before I came.
Dru: So, how are things going for you career wise?
Gru: Great! So, so great! Crushing it.
Agnes: Wait, wait, wait. You saw a for real live unicorn? What did it look like? Did you pet it? Did it smell like candy? Was it fluffy?!
Scar-Faced Man: It was so fluffy, I thought I was going to die.
Dru: Face it, Gru! Villainy is in your blood! You can’t tell me you don’t miss the rush a little?
Gru: Uh, yeah, maybe a little.
Gru: Oh, we’re getting…
Dru: Along perfectly.
Gru: Wait. Did we…
Dru: Just finish…
Gru, Dru: Sentences?
[they both laugh]
Lucy: Oh, that’s delightful. Not creepy at all. And you’re going to stop now though, right?
Gru: Sorry, it’s a twin thing.
Niko’s Mother: You refuse my son’s engagement pig?
Niko’s Mother: May you and your daughter die a slow death and be buried with onions!
Lucy: Alright, lady, that’s it! Nobody, nobody curses my daughter! You got that? Because if you mess with Margo, you mess with me! And I promise, you do not want to mess with me. Do you understand me?
Niko’s Mother: Yes. Yes.
Lucy: Good. Now get!
[as Gru and Dru are their heist to steal the diamond]
Gru: Oh, I miss the minions.
[to Gru during their diamond heist]
Dru: Oh, you were right. I should have stayed in the boat. My stomach feels all queasy. I shouldn’t have eaten that pot pie.
[after they steal the diamond and Gru reveals he intends to return to the AVL]
Dru: You lied to me!
Gru: Hey, I would have told you the truth. But you’re too much of a wimp to handle it! That’s it. I’m out of here.
Dru: You have no right to take that. We stole it together!
Gru: Together? You got to be kidding me! You did nothing but screw up the whole time. I got this in spite of you.
Dru: Oh, yeah? Well, at least I didn’t get fired from my job like a total loser!
Gru: At least I had a job! What have you accomplished that was so great? I’ll tell you what. Nothing! No wonder dad thought you were such a failure.
Dru: We are no longer brothers!
Gru: That’s fine with me.
[after Agnes captures a one-horned goat thinking it’s a unicorn]
Gru: Honey, that’s not actually a unicorn.
Agnes: Huh? But, he has one horn.
Gru: I’m sorry, sweetie. But he’s just a goat. Life is just like that sometimes. We’re hoping for a unicorn, and we get a goat.
Balthazar Bratt: You’ve ruined everything! And now, it’s time to die. Any last words, Gru?
Gru: You know what? I got two words for you. Dance fight.
Balthazar Bratt: Oh, it is on like Donkey Kong. I am going to enjoy this.
[he starts dancing]
[as Dru steals Gru’s aircraft]
Gru: Hey! I thought we said no more villainy!
Dru: Sorry, brother! Somebody’s got to keep the family tradition alive, right?
[he takes off in the aircraft]
Lucy: Let’s get him.
Gru: Honey, he’s my brother! We’ll give him a five minute head start.
[does a villainous laugh]
5. Minions (2015)
Spin-off prequel which follows Minions Kevin, Stuart and Bob, who embark on a global trip to find a new villainous master. On their travel they meet and are recruited by female supervillain, Scarlett Overkill (Sandra Bullock), who, alongside her inventor husband, Herb (Jon Hamm), are hatching a plan to take over the world.
Narrator: Minions. Minions have been on this planet far longer than we have. They go by many names. Dave, Carl, Paul, Mike. Oh, that one is Norbert. He’s an idiot. They’re all different, but they all share the same goal. To serve the most despicable master they could find. Making their master happy was the tribe’s very reason for existence. But that’s not to say that they didn’t have other passions. Finding a boss was easy. But keeping a boss, therein lies the rub.
Narrator: The tribe said their farewells. Kevin had given them something they hadn’t had in a very long time. Hope. Kevin felt pride. He was going to be the one to save his tribe. Stuart felt hungry mostly. He was going to be the one to eat this banana. And Bob, Bob was frightened of the journey ahead. And they were Off. Off to find their new boss!
Madge Nelson: Say, fellas, can we get personal for just a second? Why are you going to Orlando?
Walter Nelson: Come on. You can tell us. You’re going to Villain-Con, aren’t you?
Kevin: Si, Villain-Con.
Madge Nelson: Wow! So many bad guys in the car. What fun!
Walter Nelson: I knew it! I knew you were villains! Didn’t I, honey? What a small world! Hope we’re not in rival gangs.
Tina: [to Kevin] Scarlet Overkill! The coolest supervillain like ever! She started out as your average little girl, braces, pigtails. But by the time she was thirteen, she built a criminal empire! If I was a minion, that’s who I’d want to work for!
Scarlett Overkill: Doesn’t it feel so good to be bad?
Scarlett Overkill: This is Queen Elizabeth, ruler of England. Oh, I love England. The music, the fashion. I’m seriously thinking about overthrowing it someday. Anyway, this pale drink of water oversees it all. I’m her biggest fan, love her work! And I really, really, really want her crown. Steal me the crown, and all your dreams come true. Respect! Power!
Stuart the Minion: Banana!
Herb Overkill: Wow! These cats are pumped!
Scarlett Overkill: Well, maybe I’ll settle them down with a bedtime story? How does that sound, Bob? Bob! Bob! Bob!
Bob: Oh! Bedtime porry?
Herb Overkill: That is a groovy idea! I’ll go get some cookies and warm milk. This is going to be so fun!
Scarlett Overkill: Oh, yes, I’ve got a really, really good bedtime porry. Once upon a time, there were three little pigs. One fateful day, the pigs encountered a big, bad wolf, who had a wonderful surprise for them! The wolf offered the three piggies and all their friends a job working for her. Everyone would be so happy. All the three little piggies had to do was just steal one little crown that the beautiful wolf had wanted ever since she was a penniless little street cub, unloved, and abandoned. But that crown would mean she was a princess, and everybody loves a princess. So the wolf sent the piggies to get that crown. But the little pigs weren’t up to the challenge. They failed their mission. So the wolf huffed, and puffed, and she blew them off the face of the earth! The end.
[as she’s fightin off the minions]
The Queen: Gentlemen do not steal ladies crowns!
Scarlett Overkill: Don’t you “Scarlet” me, you backstabbing little traitors! Using Herb’s invention to steal my crown?
Herb Overkill: I feel used. Not going to lie.
Scarlett Overkill: You stole my dream! I was going to conquer England someday. There was going to be a coronation, and I was going to be made Queen. Every moment was planned. I’d wear a dress so sparkly, it glowed. And everyone who ever doubted me would be watching, and they would be crying! I was going to be the picture of elegance and class! And you pinheads screwed it up!
[as she locks Kevin, Stuart and Bob in the torture room]
Scarlett Overkill: I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, but I hate you. I thought I could get over what you did, but I feel so betrayed. I think, yes, I think we’re going to have to break up. And it’s not you. Oh, wait, hold on. It is you. It’s a hundred percent you.
Kevin: No! No!
Scarlett Overkill: So get comfortable, Minions. Get real, real comfortable. Because this is where you’re going to spend the rest of your worthless little lives.
[Herb enters the torture room wearing a hood over his head]
Herb Overkill: Alright! Let’s do this!
Herb Overkill: Who’s this handsome Herb fella? No, my name is Blerb. I’m a dungeon master. Prepare for torture, which I do! Alright, are we comfy? Doesn’t matter! This is torture!
[as he tries to stretch Kevin, Stuart and Bob]
Herb Overkill: Wow! Harder than I thought. Next machine! Oh, welcome to Hang Town! Population, you!
[as Kevin, Stuart and Bob are laughing]
Herb Overkill: Cut it out! This is really unprofessional! There’s no laughing in the dungeon! I want to see tears, and I want to hear screams, or I’m going to get… Wait! Ooh! I’ve got a groovy idea!
[as Herb is having fun with the minions instead of torturing them]
Scarlett Overkill: [over speaker] Hello! Will the future king, Herb Overkill, please come upstairs to prepare for the coronation?
Herb Overkill: Well, I hope you learned your lesson for today.
[takes off the hood on his head]
Herb Overkill: And by the way, it was me, Herb, the whole time! I don’t even know anyone named Blerb!
Scarlett Overkill: They took everything from me! My castle! My reputation! Things look bleak, baby, I’m not going to lie! But now at least I have my crown!
[young Gru suddenly freezes her and Herb]
[after she’s been frozen by young Gru, who takes the crown from her frozen hand]
Scarlett Overkill: Child, give me that back.
Young Gru: No, I don’t think so!
Scarlett Overkill: You have no idea who you’re messing with! I am the greatest supervillain of all time!
Young Gru: Oh, were you?
[after young Gru takes off with the crown and the minions go after him]
Scarlett Overkill: Get back! Are you really going to allow that little penguin to make off with my crown? Oh, Herb. I’m done.
[Bob then gives her his teddy bear’s tiny crown]
Scarlett Overkill: For me?
[as a young Gru flees with the crown on his rocket-powered motorbike aircraft]
Narrator: And that is how the Minions found their new boss. He was cunning, he was evil, he was perfect! He was despicable!
6. Minions: The Rise of Gru (2021)
Second installment of the spin-off prequel follows teenager Gru, who dreams to become the world’s greatest supervillain. After his interview to join the supervillain supergroup known as the Vicious 6 goes wrong, Gru suddenly finds himself the mortal enemy of the apex of evil.
Gru: [loudly] Distinguished villains, my name is Gru! I feel like I’m talking too loud, even though our proximity doesn’t require this kind of volume!
Belle Bottom: You seriously think a puny little child can be a villain?
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