Starring: Taron Egerton, Jamie Foxx, Ben Mendelsohn, Eve Hewson, Jamie Dornan, Tim Minchin, Paul Anderson, Josh Herdman, Björn Bengtsson
OUR RATING: ★★½
Action-adventure directed by Otto Bathurst, the story follows Robin of Loxley (Taron Egerton), a war-hardened Crusader, who returns to discover Sherwood Forest rife with corruption and evil. Teaming with a band of outlaws, led by the Moorish commander, Little John (Jamie Foxx), Robin takes matters into his own hands to set things right.
Best Quotes (Total Quotes: 42)
Robin Hood: Tuck, where is Marian?
Friar Tuck: Robin? Robin, you’re not dead?
Robin Hood: No, not for want of trying.
Friar Tuck: But your name was read out from the list of fallen soldiers.
Robin Hood: What?
Friar Tuck: Two years ago. We were told you were dead. Marian had a memorial for you. It was lovely. I wrote you a very moving eulogy. It’s a pity you missed it. Well, I’m thrilled you missed it, because it would have been completely inappropriate, given you are not dead.
Robin Hood: Where is Marian?
Friar Tuck: Look, things have taken rather a turn since you’ve been gone, Robin. After you died, the Sheriff seized Loxley Manor as collateral for his war tax and threw Marian out. And it’s not just her. He’s crushing us all with his war effort. Tolls, collections. Rob, he’s driven most of the commoners out of Nottingham proper.
Robin Hood: To where?
Friar Tuck: To the mines.
Robin Hood: She’s there now?
Friar Tuck: Yes, but, Rob, Marian’s…
Friar Tuck: This is not going to end well.
Little John: I’ve seen your woman, English. She is beautiful.
Robin Hood: She’s not mine anymore, not since the sheriff…
Little John: Shipped you off to war!
Robin Hood: You should have killed me. Everyone thinks I’m dead, so this must be hell!
Little John: You want to know what hell is? I lost my hand in this war. My people were in chains. My land was pillaged. And my son was murdered!
Robin Hood: I’m sorry I couldn’t save him.
Little John: But you tried to.
[Robin nods his head]
Little John: In all my years of war, I’ve never seen anything like it. That’s why I chose you.
Robin Hood: Chose me? What for?
Little John: This war, all wars, and everything happening here, it’s as old as time. Rich men getting richer. Men of power taking more power from the blood of innocents. Yours, mine, and my son’s. And I want to stop it. But I cannot do it alone.
Robin Hood: We’re just two men. What can we do?
Little John: You’re only powerless if you believe you’re powerless. Follow me, English.
Robin Hood: I want to take the sheriff down. I want to hit him where it hurts.
Little John: One thing keeps him in power.
Robin Hood: He’s got the whole church behind him. He’s got an army of…
Little John: The money.
Robin Hood: What, you mean what he takes from the commoners for the war effort?
Little John: We steal it. You heard him. Nottingham is the bank and the beating heart of the Crusades. And I want to put a knife through it. Vengeance for you, and justice for my son.
Robin Hood: I’m Robin.
Little John: Yahya ibn Umar.
Robin Hood: Yokhya…
[Robin stammers as he attempts to say the name]
Little John: No. Please, no more. In your language, it’s John. Son of Umar.
Robin Hood: John it is.
[they shake hands]
Little John: You’re slow as the Second Coming.
Robin Hood: Yeah, well, I spent four years of my life killing your people.
Little John: Well, you missed me.
Robin Hood: Yeah, well, nobody’s perfect.
Little John: You must be. I can fire two arrows a second.
Robin Hood: Yeah, you could fire two arrows a second.
Little John: You think you’re faster? Shoot me.
Robin Hood: Beg your pardon?
Little John: You’ve killed hundreds of us. What’s one more?
Robin Hood: Okay.
[Robin shoots an arrow and misses him]
Little John: Please. I said shoot me.
[Robin shoots another arrow]
Little John: Too slow. Fast as you can!
[Robin shoots another arrow]
Little John: Again, come on, English!
Little John: [to Robin] This war will be fought up close. You’ll need a street weapon.
Little John: [to Robin] You were a lord, but now, you get to be a thief. And I’m going to show you how. This won’t be like any war you’re used to.
[John is cutting Robin’s coat with his knife]
Robin Hood: Uh, what are you doing to my coat?
Little John: It’s too long. It’s slowing you down.
Robin Hood: When do I actually get to, you know, steal? I really liked this coat.
Little John: Well, now, it’s a jacket.
[as Robin is training, he shoots an arrow, hits the target looking away from it]
Robin Hood: What else you got?
Little John: [to Robin] You wanted to steal? Now is your time.
[referring to Marian]
Little John: I don’t trust you around her.
Robin Hood: What? I played my part.
Little John: If you need some motivation, if she finds out what we’re up to, it’s her head on the chopping block, the same as ours.
Robin Hood: Really inspiring. Thanks.
Sheriff of Nottingham: I’m the law and order here. Tighten the security. All tax collections now go directly to the count room, and double the guard at the treasury.
Friar Tuck: As you say, sir.
Sheriff of Nottingham: I can’t afford to lose another penny.
Friar Tuck: Sir, it’s been a bit since your last confession. Would you care to unburden yourself to your friar?
Sheriff of Nottingham: My conscience is clear. Is yours?
Friar Tuck: Try as I might, mine’s always a bit of a muddle.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Well, be that as it may, keep your ears open in your little booth. Any talk of the thief, bring it to me.
Friar Tuck: But, sir, with respect, the Seal of the Confessional is sacred.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Nothing’s sacred till I’ve caught that thief and drowned him in a cage.
Lord Pembroke: With respect, sheriff, this thief is making you look like a damn fool!
Robin Hood: If I may, I propose a bounty.
Lord Pembroke: Surely you don’t expect us to finance it.
Robin Hood: No. I will stake it personally. Should we say a thousand a week to begin with? And then I’ll double it every week, thereafter, until he’s either caught or killed.
Robin Hood: What about the Hood?
Will Scarlet: The Hood. He means nothing to me. He’ll be caught, and forgotten. And what I, Marian, and the rest of the commoners are fighting for is much bigger than some petty thief turning over a few couriers and collection boxes.
Robin Hood: Still, I wouldn’t bet against him. I reckon he’s just getting started.
Robin Hood: John! I’ve had a thought. Hear me out. I want to go big. Forget couriers and collection boxes. I want to hit the treasury itself.
Little John: Hard target.
Robin Hood: Pull the tail, see who bites!
Little John: How would you do it?
Arch Deacon: Our cardinal has asked me to convey to you his disquiet, at your so-far defensive response to this thief.
Sheriff of Nottingham: It’s nothing I can’t handle. You can tell His Eminence he needn’t lose any sleep.
Arch Deacon: Reassure him yourself in due time. He’s coming here.
Sheriff of Nottingham: From Rome? Over a petty thief?
Arch Deacon: The church does not consider the raiding of its treasury petty.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Ah, he barely escaped, and he got away with nothing.
Arch Deacon: But what’s dangerous is the audacity of his crimes. He’s got our commoners looking up, seeing hope. We want their backs bent and heads bowed.
Arch Deacon: There’s been whispers of revolt. Unchecked, those whispers will build into a roar.
Sheriff of Nottingham: It’s treason. It’s punishable by death.
Friar Tuck: Treason’s a very strong word, sir. Isn’t the Christian thing to turn the other cheek?
Sheriff of Nottingham: How do you love a God that gives you that face?
[Deacon and Nottingham laugh]
Arch Deacon: Sheriff! Given our shared interest in the outcome of the war, it’s essential this thief is caught and his rhetoric suffocated.
Sheriff of Nottingham: I’ll restore the order. You keep the faith, Your Grace.
Arch Deacon: Sheriff, the church can make a man, or break him. For your allegiance, we offer you the world. But in failure, we can also take it away. Remember that. Hm? Let’s make the cardinal feel welcome, sheriff.
[he grabs hold of Tuck]
Sheriff of Nottingham: If you ever defy me again in front of the church…
Friar Tuck: I‘m sorry, sir. I was only speaking for the Gospels.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Oh, the Gospels. Well, never, never forget, Tuck, God’s up there. I’m down here.
Little John: He’s coming because of the Hood. Our plan is working!
Robin Hood: That’s very easy to say from where you’re standing.
Maid Marian: Will and I got an invite to the cardinal’s party. Was that your doing?
Friar Tuck: I may have put a word into the sheriff’s ear as to the political astuteness of tossing commoners a few crumbs from the guest list.
Maid Marian: I may never get into the palace again. This is our shot.
Friar Tuck: And we must take it. And Will?
Maid Marian: He can’t know what we’re doing. He wouldn’t approve.
Friar Tuck: Rob will be there, surely.
Maid Marian: And?
Friar Tuck: Marian, what we are doing is very dangerous. We cannot risk letting our emotions compromise it. You and Rob…
Maid Marian: Tuck, I know. You sure you’re up for this?
Friar Tuck: [chuckles] No.
Lord Pembroke: Stealing from the rich to give to the poor. He’s taking the piss out of the whole damn natural order.
Robin Hood: Oh, you flatter him. He’s a smash and grabber, nothing more. And hideously ugly, hence that ridiculous hood.
Sheriff of Nottingham: I wonder if he isn’t a veteran. Huh?
Robin Hood: Of the Crusades?
Sheriff of Nottingham: Clearly, he’s well-trained. He’s audacious. Adaptable under fire.
Robin Hood: Hmm. Living on luck there, sir. You’ll get him eventually.
Robin Hood: So, Marian. Who do you think the thief is?
Maid Marian: He’s all of us. That’s what counts.
Robin Hood: Ah, so you’re an admirer.
Maid Marian: He has his qualities.
Sheriff of Nottingham: You want to see fear? I’ll send my men to raid the mines tonight. Now, when that’s done, I’ll take the commoners for everything they’ve got, from their pisspots to their pocket coins. And when that is done, I will burn their shit slums to the ground, just to remind them they’re not the people, they’re my subjects. Will that satisfy you, priest?
Cardinal: Go with God, sheriff.
Little John: We’re too late. There are too many of them.
Robin Hood: What, for you and me? There’s not enough.
Maid Marian: Rob?
Robin Hood: How did you know it was me?
Maid Marian: You call that a disguise?
[she pulls down the scarf tied around his mouth]
Robin Hood: Well it fooled everybody else!
Maid Marian: I’m not everyone else!
Robin Hood: All I wanted was to get you back.
Maid Marian: Maybe that’s how it started, but it’s bigger than that now.
Robin Hood: I’m not who you think I am. The Hood’s just a disguise.
Maid Marian: I know you. Loxley is the disguise.
Maid Marian: In the mines, there’s a thing called a firedamp, when a single spark sets the air on fire. That’s what you are for the people.
Robin Hood: Me?
Maid Marian: If not you, who? If not now, when?
Robin Hood: The sheriff, he and the cardinal, they’re in league with the Arabians somehow.
Maid Marian: Yeah. I might have proof.
Robin Hood: But if the people knew…
Maid Marian: If the people knew, they’d fight. With the right leader.
Little John: If you want me to give up the thief, at least give me the respect and try and beat it out of me.
Sheriff of Nottingham: No. You’d just die on me out of spite. Humans are the only species that fear death. But not just the threat of it, but its finality. That’s what separates us from the insects and the dogs. The Arab, however, doesn’t fear death at all, because your false prophet promised you the garden.
Little John: A man without faith. Lonely.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Liberating. Without judgment, no sin.
Little John: Faith. We stare death in the face with courage and honor.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Really? Because I was told that your boy begged for his life right up until the moment that we took his head from his neck. Decapitation’s a funny thing because the eyes keep seeing. The mind goes on trying to deny death. Even if it’s just for a few more moments. But I wonder what your son might have been thinking in those final seconds. I imagine it to be something like, “Father, why have you brought me to this place? Father, I’m scared. Father, why don’t you save me?”
[John tries to grab hold of Nottingham in anger, but his chains won’t allow him]
Sheriff of Nottingham: If you don’t give me the thief’s name, I will gorge you with pig’s blood and I will burn you and you will never see paradise. But if you do give me his name, I’ll martyr you quickly, cleanly. You will join your boy.
Sheriff of Nottingham: Oh, I’m glad your faith is so strong. It’s going to make breaking it so much sweeter.
Little John: I’m a killer. I was born into this war. But I’ve never met a man who had his killing coming as much as you do. You’re going to want to believe in a god. You’re going to want to see His face and think that something can save you. But you’ll see my face. And that’s the last thing you’ll see.
[to the crowd]
Robin Hood: Four years ago, I marched off to fight for a liar’s cause. Left my heart, came home an heir to nothing. The question is, what would you do to get back what’s yours? I’m guessing you’d be up for a little redistribution of wealth?
Will Scarlet: Well, the sheriff has already rinsed us for everything we have.
Robin Hood: The sheriff and the cardinal are plotting against England with the enemy. Now, I don’t know what their scheme is, but I’m willing to bet that it’s your money bankrolling it. Money which is due to set sail to Arabia in three days.
Maid Marian: But not if we stop them.
Robin Hood: Some say I rob from the rich and give to the poor. But if the rich are stealing from you, who’s really the thief? I was Robin of Loxley, a Crusader under the flag of the King of England. Then I was the Hood. Now, I really don’t care what you call me, thief or lord. All I know is I’m nothing without your help. This is our crusade! And each and every one of us has to stand up or we all go under.
Will Scarlet: The sheriff will have all his Crossmen on that convoy.
Friar Tuck: A legion of them, no doubt. Elite killers armed to the teeth, and the city streets on lockdown, so you can forget about the element of surprise. We’ll be lambs to the slaughter. This is…
Will Scarlet: Suicide, yeah, we get it.
Will Scarlet: What do you say to that, then, soldier?
Robin Hood: Set up a meeting at Loxley Manor. Everyone who’s with us.
Robin Hood: Here’s the plan.
Sheriff of Nottingham: As long as he is uncaught, my money’s not safe. Now did you leave your balls for this kind of work in the desert, did you? I want his blood flooding the streets of Nottingham! I want the rats swimming in it! I want the dogs licking it from the streets! My life rides on that wagon.
Sheriff of Nottingham: A thousand pounds for the man who brings me Hood! One of these bastards knows who he is!
Maid Marian: Was that supposed to happen?
Robin Hood: Yeah, of course.
Friar Tuck: [to John] I’m actually quite giddy to find myself an outlaw. It’s the most exciting thing that’s happened to me since, uh, well, come to think of it, ever.
Robin Hood: You know, when I was back in the desert, all I thought about was coming back here and being with you. Sitting in our manor, eating and drinking and not doing very much. And now we’re fugitives, and me the leader of a revolution. I didn’t see it coming.
Maid Marian: I did.
[as they are making their way to Sherwood]
Friar Tuck: It’s a nice forest. We haven’t officially met. I’m Tuck, by the way.
Little John: Yahya ibn Umar.
Friar Tuck: Phew. Would you mind if I just translate it and call you John?
Friar Tuck: [voice over] Feels like a perfect ending, doesn’t it? But it’s not. Fate plays its part. And it’s the way of things that as one story ends, another begins.
[last lines; after being made Sheriff of Nottingham by the Cardinal Will is giving a speech to the crowd ]
Will Scarlet: My city, my people, in the day since the thief and his partners and raiders have been hunted into hiding, we have laid to rest our good sheriff. Yet Nottingham still smolders from the fires of their revolt. My baptism was one of fire, but I am grateful for its cause. For it has turned me toward my true calling, serving the cause of peace as the Sheriff of Nottingham. And this has only one ending. With me standing over the corpse of the Hood.
[from afar Robin is pointing his arrow at Will, who’s holding up a poster of Robin Hood]
Robin Hood: Welcome to the big table, Sheriff.
[Robin shoots an arrow at the poster]
Total Quotes: 42
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