Starring: Alec Baldwin, Steve Buscemi, Jimmy Kimmel, Lisa Kudrow, Patton Oswalt, Miles Bakshi
OUR RATING: ★★★☆☆
Animated comedy directed by Tom McGrath. The Boss Baby (2017) follows seven year-old Tim (Miles Bakshi), whose life is turned upside down upon the arrival of his suit wearing fast-talking, briefcase-carrying baby brother (Alec Baldwin). When Tim goes on a mission to win back the affection of his parents, he finds out about a secret plot by the CEO of Puppy Co., which revolves around his baby brother and threatens to destabilize the balance of love in the world. Both brothers must unite to “save their parents, restore order to the world and prove that love is indeed an infinite force”.
Our Favorite Quotes:'You can't miss what you never had.' - Boss Baby Click To Tweet
Adult Tim: Survival of the fittest. It’s the law of the jungle. There’s always someone trying to take what’s yours. How do I know? It almost happened to me.
Tim: My name is Tim. I have the greatest parents ever. It was just the three of us, the Templetons. Life was perfect until that one fateful day.
Mom: Rise and shine.
Dad: It’s take your kid to work day.
Mom: Tim, look who’s here.
Dad: [she turns and we see she’s holding a baby wearing a suit] Meet your new baby brother.
Tim: We need to talk! About the B-A-B-E-E.
Mom: Y, Tim.
Tim: Why? Because he came out of nowhere! We don’t even know him! How can we trust him?
Dad: Come on, he’s just a baby.
Tim: Look at him! He wears a suit!
Mom: I know, it’s it cute? He’s like a little man.
Tim: He carries a briefcase. Does no one else think that’s, oh, I don’t know, a little freaky!
Dad: Well you carried lamb-lamb around until you were like…
Tim: This is not about lamb-lamb.
Mom: All babies are different, Tim.
Dad: And each one is special.
Tim: He’s taking over the whole house!
Mom: [playfully to Boss Baby] Are you taking over the house? Yes, you are. Yes, you are.
Dad: Trust me one day you’re going to get to know this little guy and you are going to love him with all of your heart, just like we do.
Baby Boss: We babies are having a crisis, babies aren’t getting as much love as we used to. Behold out mortal enemy. Puppies!
Triplets: Oh, no. That’s awful.
Staci: What is it?
Baby Boss: Well it’s simpler if I just show you.
Baby Boss: [places a talking teddy toy on the coffee table] Teddy, if you please.
Teddy: Let’s put on a show. Here we go.
Baby Boss: Jimbo, hit the lights.
[Jimbo drops the lamp which kills the lights]
Baby Boss: You see, babies aren’t getting as much love as we used to.
Baby Boss: [points to a slide with an image of a cute puppy] Behold our mortal enemy! Puppies!
Baby Boss: [as all the babies “ah” at the cuteness of the puppy] No! No! That’s exactly the problem! This is war. Puppies are winning and babies are losing.
Triplet #1: Oh-oh.
Triplet #2: That’s awful.
Triplet #3: That’s bad news, baby.
Staci: What are we going to do?
Baby Boss: You’re going to help me.
Triplet #2: Genius!
Triplet #1: Homerun.
Triplet #3: You still got it, boss.
Baby Boss: Yay.
'Either you run the day, or the day runs you.' - Boss Baby Click To Tweet
Baby Boss: Now, your parents all work for Puppy Co, so have you learned anything from them?
Triplet #3: Yes, sir.
Triplet #2: Sure, did.
Baby Boss: Fantastic. Triplets, go!
Triplet #2: A.
Triplet #1: B.
Triplet #3: C.
Triplet #2: D.
Baby Boss: No, what have you learned about puppies?
Baby Boss: No, Jimbo! Puppies are evil! Staci, read back the notes.
Staci: I can’t read. What’s it say?
Baby Boss: [she turns her notepaper around and we see some squiggly lines] This is my team? A muscle head, a bunch of yes-men, and a doodler.
Triplet #2: Exactly!
Triplet #1: Affirmative.
Baby Boss: [to Jimbo] Put that cookie down! Cookies are for closers!
Dad: [as their parents come into the living room] Oh, it’s like they’re having their own little meeting.
Baby Boss: [as all the babies start acting like babies] God, this is so humiliating.
Baby Boss: [Tim wakes up to hear a man speaking in his baby brother’s room] Oh, the usual procedure, sleep deprivation, hunger strikes. They’re very disoriented, but I think the kid might be on to me.
Tim: [opens the bedroom door, turns on the light] Hands up, baby!
Baby Boss: Aaah! Poop doody!
Baby Boss: [Tim falls down from shock, the baby whispers into the phone] I’ve got to deal with the K-I-D.
Tim: You can talk!
Baby Boss: Uh, goo-goo ga-ga.
Tim: No, you can really talk!
Baby Boss: Fine, I can talk. Now let’s see if you can listen. Get me a double espresso and see if there’s some place around here with decent sushi. I’d kill for a spicy tuna roll around about now.
Baby Boss: [walks over to Tim, takes a wad of cash out and throws some into his face] Get yourself a little something.
Tim: Just wait until mom and dad find out about this.
Baby Boss: [falls asleep, snores, then wakes up] Powernap! You were saying?
'Those who can, do. And those who can't, supervise. - Tim (The Boss Baby) Click To Tweet
Baby Boss: I’m on a mission. There’s not enough love to go around, my job is to find out why. Now get me a double espresso and see if there’s some place around here with decent sushi. I’d kill for a spicy tuna roll around about now.
[he walks over to Tim, takes a wad of cash out and throws some into Tim’s face]
Tim: Who are you?
Baby Boss: Let’s just say I’m the boss.
Tim: The boss? You’re a baby, you wear a diaper!
Baby Boss: Do you know who else wears diapers, astronauts and NASCAR drivers, that’s who. It’s called efficiency, Templeton. The average toddler spends what, forty-five hours a year on the potty. I’m the boss, I don’t have that kind of spare time.
Tim: [referring to the Blackbird song] Stop it! That’s my song, not yours. My parents wrote it just for me.
Boss Baby: Really? Your parents are Lennon and McCartney?
Tim: No, Ted and Janice.
Boss Baby: You don’t even know their names!
Tim: We could share.
Boss Baby: You obviously didn’t go to business school.
'Aim for failure, and you'll always succeed.' - Boss Baby Click To Tweet
Tim: Mom, dad, the baby can talk!
Baby Boss: This is war!
Baby Boss: If I don’t succeed in this mission I will live here forever with you!
Tim: Okay, I will help you. But just to get rid of you.
Baby Boss: Deal.
Tim: [as he tries to feed Baby] Here comes the choo-choo train.
Baby Boss: No! No!
Tim: [referring to their parents] They’re watching. Choo-choo.
Baby Boss: Okay.
Baby Boss: [as he sees their parents leave them he barfs the food all over Tim’s face] Choo-choo on that.
Baby Boss: [as they try to break into Puppy Co] How do we get past the guard?
Baby Boss: [we see him wearing a puppy outfit as he crawls to get into Puppy Co] I’ve never been so humiliated in my life!
Baby Boss: [just then a puppy starts smelling his butt] Aargh!
Mom: What’s all the racket?
Tim: [we see he’s dressed Baby in a sailors outfit] Isn’t he adorable?
Mom: Oh! I’ve got one for you too!
Baby Boss: [whispers to Tim] Bummer.
Baby Boss: I can’t do this without you, Tim.
Tim: We do make a pretty good team.
Baby Boss: No, literally, I can’t reach the door knobs.
Tim: What? You’ve never been tickled? What about your parents? I’m sorry, I forgot. You didn’t have parents, did you?
Boss Baby: Tim, I may look like a baby, but I was born all grown up.
Tim: I can’t even imagine not being a kid. You missed out on your whole childhood? You never had someone to love you?
Boss Baby: You can’t miss what you never had.