Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Chris Evans, Scarlett Johansson, Chris Hemsworth, Jeremy Renner, Paul Rudd, Mark Ruffalo, Anthony Mackie, Paul Bettany, Elizabeth Olson, Chadwick Boseman, Sebastian Stan, Don Cheadle, Chris Pratt, Dave Bautista, Zoe Saldana, Pom Klementieff, Benedict Cumberbatch, Benedict Wong, Sean Gunn, Tom Holland, Jon Favreau, Brie Larson, Karen Gillan, Gwyneth Paltrow, Evangeline Lilly, Letitia Wright, Josh Brolin
OUR RATING: ★★★★☆
MCU’s fantasy action adventure superhero sequel directed by Anthony and Joe Russo. Avengers: Endgame picks up from Avengers: Infinity War, and finds Thanos’s snap survivors, Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.), Steve Rogers (Chris Evans), Natasha Romanoff (Scarlett Johansson), Clint Barton (Jeremy Renner), Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and Scott Lang (Paul Rudd) coming together to concoct a plan to defeat Thanos (Josh Brolin).
Our Favorite Quotes:
Tony Stark: [recording a message using his helmet] This thing on? Hey, Miss Potts, Pep. If you find this recording, don’t post it on social media. It’s going to be a real tear-jerker. I don’t know if you’re ever going to see these. I don’t even know if you’re still… Oh, God, I hope so. Today is day twenty-one, twenty-two. You know, if it wasn’t for the existensial terror of staring into the literal void of space, I’d say, I’m feeling more better today. The infection’s run its course, thanks to the blue meanie back there. You’d love her. Very practical. Only a tiny bit sadistic.
Tony Stark: [continuing recording his message to Pepper] Some fuel cells were cracked during battle, but we figured out a way to reverse the ion charge to buy ourselves about forty-eight hours of playtime. But it’s now dead in the water. We’re a thousand lightyears from the nearest 7-Eleven. Oxygen will run out tomorrow morning, and that’ll be it. And Pep, I know I said no more surprises, but I got to say I was really hoping to pull off one last one. But it looks like, well, you know what it looks like. Don’t feel bad about this. I mean actually if you grovel for a couple weeks, and then move on with enormous guilt. I should probably lie down. I’m going to rest my eyes. Please know when I drift off, it’ll be like every night. I’m fine, totally fine. I’ll dream about you, because it’s always you.
Tony Stark: [referring to Peter] I couldn’t stop him.
Steve Rogers: Neither could I.
Tony Stark: I lost the kid.
Steve Rogers: Tony, we lost.
Steve Rogers: It’s been twenty-three days since Thanos came to Earth.
Natasha Romanoff: World governments are in pieces. The parts that are still working, are trying to take a census. And it looks like he did, he did exactly what he said he was going to do. Thanos wiped out fifty percent of all living creatures.
Tony Stark: [referring to Thor] What’s wrong with him?
Rocket: He’s pi**ed. Thinks he failed. Which, of course he did, but, you know, there’s a lot of that going around, ain’t there?
Tony Stark: Honestly, at this exact second, I thought you were a Build-A-Bear.
Rocket: Maybe I am.
Steve Rogers: We’ve been hunting Thanos for three weeks now. Deep space scans, and satellites, and we got nothing. Tony, you fought him.
Tony Stark: Who told you that? I didn’t fight him. No, he wiped my face with a planet while a Bleecker Street magician gave away the stone. That’s what happened. There was no fight.
Steve Rogers: Okay. Did he give you any clues, any coordinates, anything?
Tony Stark: I saw this coming a few years back, I had a vision, but I didn’t want to believe it. Thought I was dreaming.
Steve Rogers: Tony, I’m going to need you to focus.
Tony Stark: And I needed you, as in past tense. That trumps what you need. It’s too late, buddy. Sorry.
Tony Stark: You know what I need? I need a shave. And I believe I ever remember telling you this…
James Rhodes: Tony, Tony, Tony.
Tony Stark: …why that otherwise, that what we needed was a suit of armor around the world! Remember that? Whether it impacted our precious freedoms or not, that’s what we needed.
Steve Rogers: Well, that didn’t work out, did it?
Tony Stark: I said we’d lose. You said, “We’ll do that together too.” Well, guess what, Cap? We lost, and you weren’t there. But that’s what we do, right? Our best work after the fact? We’re the Avengers? We’re the Avengers. Not the Prevengers, right?
James Rhodes: Okay, you made your point. Just sit down, okay?
Tony Stark: Okay. No, no, here’s my…
[pointing to Carol]
Tony Stark: She’s great, by the way. We need you. You’re new blood.
James Rhodes: Just sit down.
Tony Stark: Bunch of tired old wheels. I got nothing for you, Cap. I’ve got no coordinates, no clues, no strategies, no options. Zero, zip, nada. No trust, liar.
[he rips off his reactor and puts it in Steve’s hand]
Tony Stark: Here, take this. You find him and you put that on. You hide…
James Rhodes: [as Tony collapses] Tony!
Tony Stark: I’m fine.
[he passes out]
Natasha Romanoff: [referring to Thanos] He used the stones again.
Bruce Banner: Hey, hey, hey, hey. We’d be going in shorthanded, you know.
James Rhodes: But he’s still go the stones, so.
Carol Danvers: So let’s get him and use to them to bring everyone back.
Bruce Banner: Just like that?
Steve Rogers: Yeah. Just like that.
Natasha Romanoff: Even if there’s a small chance that we can undo this. I mean we owe it to everyone who’s not in this room to try.
Bruce Banner: If we do this, how do we know it’s going to end any differently than it did before?
Carol Danvers: Because before you didn’t have me.
James Rhodes: Hey, new girl, everybody in this room is about that superhero life. And if you don’t mind my asking, where the hell have you been all this time?
Carol Danvers: There are a lot of other planets in the universe, and unfortunately they didn’t have you guys
Thor: I like this one.
Steve Rogers: Let’s go get this son of a b**ch.
Rocket: Okay. Who here hasn’t been to space?
[Natasha, Steve and Rhodes put up their hands]
Rocket: You better not throw up on my ship.
Natasha Romanoff: [as they are going to find Thanos] This is going to work, Steve.
Steve Rogers: I know it is. Because I don’t know what I’m going to do if it doesn’t.
Carol Danvers: [referring to Thanos] No satellites, no ships, no armies, no ground defense of any kind. It’s just him.
Nebula: And that’s enough.
Steve Rogers: [referring to the Infinity Stones] Where are they?
Carol Danvers: Answer the question.
Thanos: The universe required correction. After that, the stones served no purpose beyond temptation.
Natasha Romanoff: Where are the stones?
Thanos: Gone. Reduced to atoms.
Bruce Banner: You used them two days ago!
Thanos: I used the stones to destroy the stones. And it nearly killed me. But the work is done, it always be. I am inevitable.
James Rhodes: He has to be lying.
Nebula: My father is many things. A liar is not one of them.
Thanos: Oh. Thank you, daughter. Perhaps I treated you too harshly.
[just then Thor decapitates him with stormbreaker]
Rocket: [after Thor decapitates Thanos] What did you do?
Thor: I went for the head.
Steve Rogers: You know, I’d offer to cook you dinner, but you seem pretty miserable already.
Natasha Romanoff: Are you here to do your laundry?
Steve Rogers: And to see a friend.
Natasha Romanoff: Clearly, your friend is fine.
Steve Rogers: You know, I saw a pod of whales when I was coming up the bridge.
Natasha Romanoff: In the Hudson?
Steve Rogers: There’s fewer ships, cleaner water.
Natasha Romanoff: You know, if you’re about to tell me to look on the bright side, I’m about to hit you in the head with a peanut butter sandwich.
Steve Rogers: Sorry. Force of habit.
Steve Rogers: [to Natasha] You know, I keep telling everybody they should move on and grow. Some do. But not us.
Scott Lang: Oh. Hi. Hi, is anyone home? This is Scott Lang. We met a few years ago at the airport in Germany. I got really big. I had my mask on. You wouldn’t recognize me.
Steve Rogers: [to Natasha] Is this an old message?
Scott Lang: Ant-Man. Ant-Man. I know you know that.
Natasha Romanoff: It’s the front door.
Scott Lang: I really need to talk to you guys.
Scott Lang: Have either of you guys ever studied quantum physics?
Natasha Romanoff: Only in mid-conversation.
Scott Lang: Alright. So five years ago, right before Thanos, I was in a place called the quantum realm. The quantum realm is like its own microscopic universe. To get in there, you have to be incredibly small. Hope, she’s my, she was my, she was supposed to pull me out. And then Thanos happened, and I got stuck in there.
Natasha Romanoff: Sorry. That must’ve been a long five years.
Scott Lang: Yeah, but that’s just it. It wasn’t. For me, it was five hours. See, the rules of the quantum realm aren’t like they are up here. Everything is unpredictable. Is that anybody’s sandwich? I’m starving.
Steve Rogers: Scott, what are you talking about?
Scott Lang: So what I’m saying is, time works differently in the quantum realm. The only problem is, right now we don’t have a way to navigate it. But what if we did? I can’t stop thinking about it. What if we could somehow control the chaos, and we could navigate it? What if there was a way that we could enter the quantum realm at a certain point in time, but then exit the quantum realm at another point in time? Like before Thanos.
Steve Rogers: Wait, are you talking about a time machine?
Scott Lang: No. No, of course not. No, not a time machine. This is more like a, yeah, like a time machine. I know, it’s crazy. It’s crazy. But I can’t stop thinking about it. There’s got to be some It’s crazy.
Natasha Romanoff: Scott, I get e-mails from a raccoon. So nothing sounds crazy anymore.
Scott Lang: So who do we talk to about this?
Tony Stark: Quantum fluctuation messes with the Planck scale, which then triggers the Deutsch proposition. Can we agree on that?
Steve Rogers: [accepts a drink] Thank you.
Tony Stark: In Layman’s terms, it means you’re not coming home.
Scott Lang: I did.
Tony Stark: No. You accidentally survived. It’s a billion to one cosmic fluke. And now you want to pull a, what do you call it?
Scott Lang: A time heist?
Tony Stark: Yeah, a time heist. Of course. Why didn’t we think of this before? Oh, because it’s laughable? Because it’s a pipedream?
Steve Rogers: The stones are in the past. We could go back and we could get them.
Natasha Romanoff: We can snap our own fingers. We can bring everybody back.
Tony Stark: Or screw it up worse than he already has, right?
Steve Rogers: I don’t believe we would.
Tony Stark: Got to say this. Sometimes, I miss that giddy optimism. However, high hopes won’t help if there’s no logical, tangible, way for me to safely execute the said, time heist. I believe the most likely outcome will be our collective demise.
Scott Lang: Not if we strictly follow the rules of time travel. That means no talking to our past selves, no betting on sporting events…
Tony Stark: I’m going to stop you right there, Scott. Are you seriously telling me that your plan to save the universe is based on Back to the Future?
Scott Lang: No.
Tony Stark: Good. You had me worried there, because that’d be horses**t. That’s not how quantum physics works.
Natasha Romanoff: Tony, we have to take a stand.
Tony Stark: We did stand. And yet, here we are.
Scott Lang: I know you got a lot on the line. You got a wife, a daughter, but I lost someone very important to me. A lot of people did. And now, now, we have a chance to bring her back. To bring everyone back. And you’re telling me that you won’t even…
Tony Stark: That’s right, Scott. I won’t. Leave it. I got a kid.
Tony Stark: I wish you’d come here to ask me something else. Anything else. Honestly, I missed you guys, it was, oh, and table’s set for six.
Steve Rogers: Tony, I get it. And I’m happy for you. I really am. But this is a second chance.
Tony Stark: I got my second chance right here, Cap. I can’t roll the dice again.
Bruce Banner: [referring to himself as Professor Hulk] I know, it’s crazy.I’m wearing shirts now.
Scott Lang: Yeah. How? Why?
Bruce Banner: Five years ago we got our asses beat. Except it was worse for me, because I lost twice. First, Hulk lost, then Banner lost. And then, we all lost.
Natasha Romanoff: No one blamed you, Bruce.
Bruce Banner: I did. For years I’ve been treating the Hulk like he’s some kind of disease, something to get rid of. But then I started looking at him as the cure. Eighteen months in a gamma lab. I put the brains and the brawn together. And now look at me, best of both worlds.
Girl: Excuse me, Mr. Hulk?
Bruce Banner: Yes?
Girl: Can we get a photo?
Bruce Banner: One hundred percent, little person. Come on, step on up. Do you mind?
Scott Lang: Oh, yeah.
Bruce Banner: Thanks. Say “green”.
Scott Lang: [referring to a photo] You want to grab one with me? I’m Ant-Man.
[no response from the kids]
Scott Lang: They’re Hulk fans. They don’t know Ant-Man. Nobody does.
Bruce Banner: Wait, no, no. No, he wants to. You want to take a picture with him, right?
Scott Lang: He’s even saying no he doesn’t. I get it.
Bruce Banner: But come on, the kid…
Scott Lang: I don’t want it either.
Bruce Banner: But you…
Scott Lang: I don’t want a picture with them.
Bruce Banner: He’s going to feel bad.
Scott Lang: Sorry.
Bruce Banner: They’re happy to. They said they’d do it.
Scott Lang: I don’t want it anymore.
Bruce Banner: No. You’d feel bad.
Scott Lang: Take the goddamn phone.
Kids: Thank you, Mr. Hulk.
Bruce Banner: No, it’s great, kids. Thank you very much. Hulk out! Bruce. Dab.
Steve Rogers: Bruce.
Bruce Banner: Listen to your mom. She knows better.