Movie Info
Starring: Paul Dano, Daniel Radcliffe, Mary Elizabeth Winstead
Story: Quirky indie comedy drama written and directed by Dan Kwan and Daniel Scheinert. Swiss Army Man (2016) centers on Hank (Paul Dano), a man stranded on a deserted island, having given up all hope of ever making it home again. However, everything changes when Hank finds a corpse named Manny (Daniel Radcliffe) washed up on shore. When the corpse turns out not to be entirely dead, the two become fast friends and Hank teaches Manny about the world once again. The two then go on an epic adventure that will bring Hank back to the woman of his dreams, Sarah (Mary Elizabeth Winstead).
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Top Swiss Army Man Quotes
Hank: You know, I had always hoped that right before I die, my life would flash before my eye, and I would see wonderful things. A life full of parties, and friends, and how I’d learned to play the guitar, and maybe there’d even be a girl. But as I was hanging up there, I didn’t really see much of anything. But I did see you. And I know it sounds dumb, but I really thought for a moment that maybe, just maybe there was a reason that you…
[Manny farts]
Hank: You’re the grossest thing in this gross world.
Manny: Why did you hit me?
Hank: I’m sorry. I thought you were dead.
Manny: Am I dead?
Hank: I don’t think so. You’re talking.
Hank: [to Manny] You’re a miracle, or I’m just hallucinating from starvation.
Hank: Manny, if you don’t know Jurassic Park, you don’t know s**t.
Hank: What’s important is you remembering your life.
Manny: Okay. What is life?
Hank: You’re like the multipurpose tool guy. You’re special.
Manny: I’m special?
Hank: Yeah. And that’s why I need you to help me get home.
Hank: [to Manny] Back in civilization, there’s seven billion other living people on the planet just running around, and blinking, and breathing, and eating, and you used to be one of them. You were probably just looking for happiness. That’s what everyone does.
Hank: Sometimes you might be lucky enough to bump into the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and that is love.
Manny: You want to go home so you can have love?
Hank: Yeah.
Manny: But you ran away because nobody loves you.
Manny: I’m sorry, Hank. I’m just saying the things in my head.
Hank: Well, you can’t just say everything that comes into your head. That’s bad talking.
Hank: Before the Internet, every girl was a lot more special.
Hank: Manny, I think your p**is is guiding us home. It’s magic.
Hank: Look, sometimes when you do something too many times, it has less of an effect. It’s like the law of diminishing returns. It happens to everyone. That’s why there are so many fetishes out there.
Manny: Girls must be so nice if they let guys do all those things to them.
Hank: Manny, the phone is on low battery with no signal. We’ve got to turn it off so we can find help once we’re closer to home.
Manny: I have a lot of questions about all the things you just said.
Hank: Buses are for people who don’t know each other.
Hank: Manny, this is just the beginning. Every day, you ride the bus and count the minutes, hoping you’ll see her again.
Manny: Oh, my God.
Hank: She smiles, and you feel a strange tingle up the back of your neck. Something carnal inside of you causes your body to break out in sweats. You feel like the luckiest man in the world. She sits alone, just like every other day, and looks out the window lost in her thoughts. You know that look. She’s just as alone as you are. But she doesn’t have to be. You could talk to her. Tell her you’d love to sit next to her today and every other day, because life is short, and no one deserves to ride the bus alone.
Manny: I’m scared, because I think if I die, I might really miss you.
Hank: Oh, you’re the worst.
Hank: People don’t like other people’s farts.
Manny: Is that why you don’t fart in front of me?
Hank: No. I just like to do it alone, or hold it in. That’s what you’re supposed to do.
Manny: That’s so sad.
Manny: If my best friend keeps his farts from me, what else is he hiding from me? And why does that make me feel so alone?
Manny: I just had a thought about a thought. How do you hide your thoughts, and why do we have to hide everything?
Hank: I’m just a scared, ugly, useless person.
Manny: But maybe everyone’s a little bit ugly. Yeah, maybe we’re all just ugly, dying sacks of s**t. And maybe all it’ll take is one person to just be okay with that, and then the whole world will be dancing, and singing, and farting, and everyone will feel a little bit less alone.
Hank: Manny, you have no idea how nice that sounds.
Manny: We’re going to die. That’s a thought. Everybody dies. I’m sorry if this makes me weird, or you don’t understand, but I wish I was dead again.
Hank: No, Manny. I understand.