Wednesday Addams: Drip is for people who hate themselves and know their lives have no real purpose or meaning.
Tyler Galpin: Wait, you read Italian?
Wednesday Addams: Of course. It’s the native tongue of Machiavelli.
Lucas: We work at Pilgrim World.
Wednesday Addams: It takes a special kind of stupid to devote an entire theme park to zealots responsible for mass genocide.
Tyler Galpin: You’re not scary. You’re just kind of kooky.
Wednesday Addams: I prefer spooky.
Wednesday Addams: Dead people are notoriously bad at returning calls.
Wednesday Addams: [to Sheriff Galpin] My father’s twice the man you are, and the only thing he murders is the occasional opera in the shower.
Wednesday Addams: Edgar Allan Poe said, “Believe nothing you hear and half of what you see.”
Wednesday Addams: Emotions are a gateway trait. They lead to feelings, which trigger tears. I don’t do tears.
Wednesday Addams: Sartre said, “Hell is other people.” He was my first crush.
Wednesday Addams: I like being an island. A well-fortified one surrounded by sharks.
Wednesday Addams: I’ve been losing my mind. It’s not nearly as fun as I had anticipated.
Enid Sinclair: Want to take a stab at being social?
Wednesday Addams: I do like stabbing. The social part, not so much.
Principal Larissa Weems: No doubt you’ll find something that tickles your fancy.
Wednesday Addams: The last person who tickled me lost a finger.
Xavier Thorpe: Ever shot a bow and arrow before?
Wednesday Addams: Only on live targets.
Sheriff Donovan Galpin: What are you two yakking about?
Tyler Galpin: Video games, cancel culture, oat milk versus soy, it’s a wild time.
Enid Sinclair: [referring to Thing] He feels like you don’t respect him as a person.
Wednesday Addams: Well, technically, he’s only a hand.
Wednesday Addams: I know I’m stubborn, single-minded, and obsessive. But those are all traits of great writers. Yes. And serial killers.
Tyler Galpin: [referring to his father] You must think it’s weird I’m stalking him.
Wednesday Addams: No, I consistently stalk my parents.
Wednesday Addams: I accidentally walked in on two vampires fanging. I can’t unsee that.
Marilyn Thornhill: Are you and your mother close?
Wednesday Addams: Like two inmates sentenced to life on the same cell block.